THIS RANT IS 90% TAKEN FROM Kal Ancalas, AN AWESOME WRITER OF FANFICTION. SO MOST OF THIS RANT DOES NOT BELONG TO ME. I JUST ADDED/SUBTRACTED SHIT.

Hi.

It's me.

Remember? Max, 12-year-old girl, lazy-ass procrastinator?

ANYWAYS. . .here's an update of sorts because I got a very. . .interesting PM from a. . .fellow FF member.

I'm not going to put their name, nor their PM, because I'm too lazy to copy-paste, and I also don't want to make my REAL FF friend's eyes start bleeding by the sheer lack of grammar in their pathetic excuse for a PM.

In a nutshell, he/she was incredibly mad (and displayed it well) because I haven't updated in like 2 weeks or so.

Begin rant now.

I do understand that you people have needs to tend to, but at the same time, I don't exactly have all that much free time on my hands. Don't believe me?

On a normal day, I drag myself out of bed at six, brush my teeth, get dressed, and eat a delicious, nutritious breakfast consisting of an apple slice. Then I waste eight and a half hours of my life at TPWOAKMYFIS: The Place Where Other Asian Kids Make You Feel Incredibly Stupid.

Also known as school.

After which I do another hour and a half of taekwondo and return home to a comfortable shelter with a loving family. . .

"IF YOU DON'T GO DOWNSTAIRS AND PRACTICE YOUR PIANO THIS INSTANT, YOU'LL REGRET THIS DAY!"

In case you haven't noticed by now, yes, I am Asian, and I reek of every single Asian stereotype that ever existed. In fact, I think my family probably invented a few of them. And don't laugh when I say that my mother is the Adolf Hitler of piano. I love and respect my parents very much, but when you have a maternal figure that screams her head off every time you get up from the fucking piano bench to get a drink of water or go to the bathroom, that's crossing the line, don't you think? And like many high-school students, my parents have been reading me the "If you don't play piano/other retarded extracurricular activities, you won't get into a good school, blah blah blah" riot act every day. EVERY FUH-REAKING DAY. I understand all of that, but it's still a royal pain in the ass.

Yes, I am good at piano. I finished my CM Level 10 test a couple of years ago and playing stuff like Mozart and Clementi is history to me.

BUT STILL.

"There's always someone better than you."

WELL NO SHIT SHERLOCK.

Personally, I can just picture my admission interview playing on in my head. The way my parents have been going on about it, you'd think it would go something like this:

"Okay, Ms. Maxine Liang, we've looked over your records. Apparently, you have a perfect A+ on all of your AP courses, your record is absolutely clean, and you obtained a perfect score on your SAT's, a feat only achieved by one student out of ten thousand. In addition, you are the captain of your school's tennis team and chess club, the president of the Student Council for five straight years, and you have performed various acts of community service and have been an upstanding member of your community. However, there is one slight problem."

"Yes?"

"We have scoured and cross-checked all your records, and we have unfortunately been able to find no record of you ever having played the piano. We are sorry, but we, at Stereotypical-Ivy-League-Big-Name University cannot accept students with a lack of knowledge of musical study. As a result, your position has been forfeited to a Russian exchange student who has a F average and a 400 on the SAT, but has been able to, however marginally, play the piano."

"B-but I can play the opening theme to Naruto!"

"We don't care about contemporary Japanese pop music. We only care about classical pieces by a bunch of old, dead, white European guys that have a lot of notes and waste their life writing little black dots on pieces of paper - excuse me, parchment. Thank you for applying and have a nice day."

Yep.

I explained all of this theoretical conversation to my parents. They were less than amused and rewarded my well thought-out argument with an extra two hours of practice.

Now that I've wasted your time by dedicating a page to piano, I also must devote an hour each every day to "getting a jump-start on Calculus".

Trust me, it's not as glamorous as it sounds when your mother bitch-slaps you for every formula you don't know. And when your father is a PhD with a degree in God knows what, apparently, it stands that you must spend time learning bullshit like derivatives.

And then I ask my parents how this will help me in life, and then they blow off their heads screaming about "DO YOU WANT TO WORK AT WAL-MART?"

. . .the fuck, bruh.

See, my parents have this deranged idea that in order to demonstrate that I've truly "mastered" the concept of God-knows-what, I'll have to do EVERY FUCKING PROBLEM IN THE FUCKING BOOK AND ON THE FUCKING INTERNET.

The INTERNET, man.

Yeah - no. I'm not cool with that.

Not to mention that all this doesn't include my usual super-sized order of homework from school every day, which usually results in me getting virtually no sleep.

And, being Asian parents, anything less than an A- results in me being a disgrace to my family and a shame.

FML.

So, returning to the original point before I ended up going on this huge-ass rant, I obviously don't have a lot of time to write. Although I don't want to sound like a jerk (too late), it is slightly disheartening to realize that you still have rabid people out there who want to read the next installment of your story, so you better fire up the computer and start , writing Fanfiction should be a joy and pleasure. It shouldn't be a two-ton ball and chain around your neck.

~Max.