Author: Raven Shadowrose

Rating: T

Pairing: ?/?

Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?

Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.

A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)

Thank you to BeethovenRIP, chan. nelson4444 and Carlykinz for your comments and support. Thanks to WrittingWhat'sOnMyMind and Hanflan for following this story

Chapter Two.

Dixie let Jeff make her breakfast and drive on the way to work, she knew that he would worry even more than he already was if she didn't, he would think she was doing too much. He was trying to hide his feelings and be strong for her, she appreciated him supporting her and helping her but she wanted Jeff to talk to her too. It was going to be hard enough getting through this without him keeping things from her. Dixie knew that he wasn't doing it on purpose, Jeff was just very good at looking after people other than himself. Dixie was determined that she would get Jeff talking about his feelings later on. Jeff had volunteered to stay off and look after her while she recovered, she wasn't looking forward to not being able to work for a fortnight but she had no choice. She'd looked quickly at the information and the appointment letter they'd been given yesterday as she was going to have to book some time off work for herself and Jeff.

Tamzin waited for Jeff and Dixie, she was worried, she knew that they had found out the results of their fertility tests yesterday. She hoped that nothing was seriously wrong with either of them, it had been six months and Dixie still wasn't pregnant. She had seen Dixie get more and more frustrated as every month went by and still no baby. Tamzin went over to Jeff and Dixie as they came in, Dixie looked very pale and upset. Tamzin's heart sank, obviously something had gone badly at the appointment yesterday. 'Dixie?' Tamzin said quietly, she was worried, what if it was something that couldn't be sorted out?

'Jeff will tell you.' Dixie carried on walking towards her office and Tamzin just watched her. Dixie was obviously heartbroken, Tamzin could hear it in her voice. 'What happened Jeff?' Tamzin was dreading the answer.

'Dixie needs an operation to unblock her fallopian tubes, it is why she can't get pregnant.'

'Oh, how's she taking it?'

'As I knew that she would, she's blaming herself.'

'I'm sorry, how are you feeling?'

'Worried, I wish it was me that was causing it.'

'I really am sorry, I know how much you both want a baby. If there's anything I can do to help then let me know.'

'Thanks Tamzin.'

'Should she be in work today?'

'I wanted her to stay home but I think she needs to be here, it is how Dixie copes, she needs to work and solve the problems that she can.'

'When is she going in?'

'Next Monday, if she agrees to it that is, Dixie doesn't like being a patient.'

'I know.' Tamzin felt sad for her friends, all they wanted was to be happy and they were having to suffer through all of this. She wanted to help them but she had no idea how.

'How are you coping Jeff?'

'I'm trying to stay strong for Dixie, she's devastated, she needs me now.'

'You need someone too Jeff.'

'I'm okay.' Tamzin knew that he was lying and this was affecting him too.

'If you need someone to talk to then you know where to find me Jeff.'

'Thanks Tamzin.'

'I mean it, don't suffer alone, I am here for you both.' Tamzin hugged Jeff, being there for them was the very least that she could do after they had welcomed her in and taken care of her the way that they had.

Dixie picked up the phone, she was going to have to let the ambulance trust know that she was going in for an operation and would be out of action for two weeks. She had the letter in front of her, she hated hospitals but she would do anything to get pregnant. She picked up the phone and dialled, there was no point in delaying the inevitable. 'Hello, can I speak to Emma Johnson please?'

'What is it regarding?'

'I need to book some time off for an operation.'

'Wait one moment please.' Dixie ran her hands through her hair as she listened to the music on the other end of the phone.

'Hello, Emma speaking.'

'My name is Kathleen Collier from Holby, I need to go into hospital next Monday for an operation, I'll be off work for a fortnight.'

'Do you have someone to cover for you?'

'I'll be putting Tamzin Bayle in charge, my husband, Jeff Collier, will want to take leave too, could you send someone to cover for him?'

'That will not be a problem, thanks for letting us know.'

'You're welcome.'

'Bye Kathleen.'

'Bye Emma.' Dixie hung up the phone, she had taken the first step towards getting all of this sorted out.

Tamzin looked up as she heard her name being called. 'What is it Dixie?'

'Can I have a word?'

'Is there a problem?'

'No, I need to ask you a favour. Jeff, can you come too?'

'Sure.' Tamzin looked at Jeff and followed Dixie into her office, she wondered what Dixie wanted from her. 'What do you need from me Dixie?'

'I am sure that Jeff has told what is wrong with me by now.'

'He has, I'm so sorry Dixie.'

'I know, thank you Tamzin. I need someone to look after the station while I recover from the operation that I need to have. I want that someone to be you.'

'Me? Are you sure?'

'Yes, I am, you are talented and clever. I need someone that I can trust in here.'

'Thank you Dixie.'

'The rotas are done, all you have to do is make sure everyone knows who they are with and send the reports to the ambulance trust.'

'Okay, I'll do it.'

'I'll be on the phone if you need me or if anything goes wrong that you think you can't handle.'

'Thank you Dixie, for trusting me with this.' Tamzin hugged Dixie and smiled, she was happy that Dixie trusted her with something as important as this.

Jeff sat with Dixie in her office, she still looked pale but determined, he was happy to see that she seemed to have got some of her fire back. 'You just made a young girl very happy Dix.'

'Oh Tamzin, she has it in her to be duty officer one day. I trust her to do a good job.'

'What about you? How are you coping?'

'I'm okay.'

'Dixie.'

'All right, I'm not looking forward to being in hospital and having this operation scares me. I am going to do it though because I want a child more than anything.'

'I know you do princess. We'll have a look through the rest of information the doctor gave us when we get home and try to put your mind at rest.'

'Thanks Jeff.'

'You're my princess Dixie and I want you to feel safe and protected and I'll do anything that it takes to make you feel that way.' Jeff suddenly found himself enveloped in a hug. 'Dixie?'

'I just want you to hold me.'

'Anything for you my love.' Jeff just held Dixie in his arms and let her stay in his arms for as long as she needed.

Dixie had tried to concentrate on work but it was hard, she had other things on her mind, she'd managed to get through the day but she was glad to be at home. Jeff placed the information from the doctor on the table and he sat next to her. Dixie picked up the booklet that explained about what was wrong with her. 'Is it making you feel any better Dixie?'

'A little bit, I'm not the only one that has been through this.'

'You're not and it isn't your fault. You didn't make this happen, it is just bad luck.'

'I know.'

'Good.'

'I'm going to find it hard going into hospital though.'

'I know but I will be with you, you have nothing to fear princess.'

'At least I can leave on the same day and come home.'

'Yes, you can.'

'I've organised leave for you, I hope that's okay.'

'It is, I am going to take care of you.'

'Can you deal with that? I am likely to be in pain after it all.'

'I know, I will make it my mission to help you feel better.' Dixie smiled and hugged Jeff, she still felt apprehensive about the operation but she could make it through it all with Jeff by her side.

Tamzin was honoured that Dixie trusted her to run the station while she was in hospital, she was sad that Dixie and Jeff were having so much trouble having a baby. They were good people and suddenly they were having all this trouble and Dixie was having to go in for an operation. Tamzin hoped that it worked and made Dixie able to have kids. Dixie would make a wonderful mother, Tamzin remembered when she came back to Holby without Omar and Dixie had looked after her. She was grateful to Dixie for helping her when she wasn't always confident, Dixie had given her the confidence to go out and treat people. Tamzin wanted to help Dixie but there wasn't much that she could do, she would pray that the operation was successful and that Dixie and Jeff would have the baby they've tried so hard for.

Jeff sat on the sofa and held Dixie, he wanted her near him, he knew that operations could go wrong and that there could be complications. 'Jeff?'

'What is it Dixie, do you need something?'

'I need you to talk to me.'

'I don't understand.'

'Jeff, I know you're worried about all of this and about me.'

'Dixie, I'm fine, please believe me.'

'No, Jeff, you're helping me and I want to help you.' Jeff sighed, Dixie knew everything.

'Okay, I'm worried. I know that all you want is to be a mother and this is a big setback. I wish that I could be the one that is the cause of this, I never wanted it to be you Dixie.'

'I know, it is not your fault either, this is just something that happened.'

'I am going to be with you Dixie, through all of it.'

'We'll face it together.'

'I should be the one being strong for you Dixie.'

'Jeff, please will you drop the caveman act? I know it is in you to want to protect everyone and me especially but we have to work together on this. Together we are unbreakable.' Jeff smiled.

'You're right, nothing will come between us. After all this is over and things are back on track we will get to hold a child of our own. You will get to yell at me while you're in labour and tell me you're never going to let me near you again and I can take care of myself in future.' Dixie laughed.

'I'll hold you to it. You'll be a great dad Jeff.'

'You'll be an amazing mummy Dixie, we'll have a little girl and she'll have your beautiful eyes.'

'I bet we'll have a little boy and he'll have your good heart and protective nature.'

'Do you mean that Dixie?'

'I do, it is what I like best about you.'

'Come here princess.' Jeff hugged Dixie, he felt a lot better having talked with her, she was right, they would face it together.

Dixie was glad that Jeff had talked to her, she knew that the news they would find it hard to have children had affected him too. He had been preoccupied and not his usual self, when Jeff is in a good mood he tells jokes and always smiles. There hadn't been any of his jokes or smiles and it saddened her to think that he was suffering alone with his feelings. She was happy that he had opened up to her. Dixie was still a little afraid but she felt better knowing that Jeff would be with her and they would one day have a child. She would fight for it with everything she had, they would be parents one day.