A/N: Hello, again. This was faster then I expected, but I needed to post this chapter before I can go on with the story and especially before I can change it again. It's short and I apologize to all of you who enjoy long chapters, but anything longer would be too dragged out.
Hope you enjoy it and I'll try to explain a few things in another note at the end.
Chapter 2
His thoughts were a mess and no door slamming could bring him out of it. He was furious; at Professor McGonagall for asking stupid questions over and over again, at Harry for not leaving him alone once and for all, at those two brats parading with their 'we are a happy couple' picture... At himself, for letting all of that affect him in ways it did.
What he wanted the most is for people to stop pretending like they live in a beautiful world. The world sucked. And like that wasn't enough! Now they wanted it to suck for those kids, too?!
He smiled bitterly.
Who knows what kind of fairytale books those people were reading when they considered him a hero. A hero has to care. A hero has to have a higher purpose, a goal, a world to save... Princess to kiss.
Don't go there, idiot!
Too late.
Ron sat down in the chair and rubbed his face. Once a year he allowed himself to let memories take over. Usually in September, when he'd buy something for her birthday and read a story from her copy of 'Tales of Beedle the Bard'. He wouldn't come to work that day. He didn't give excuses to anyone as to why. It wasn't his style.
This year, September came early.
Four years ago things were different. In the meantime he grew tired of listening to people telling him how he has changed. It took a while, but they seem to have grown tired of it, too. It simply had no effect. It's not like he would wake up one morning and all of the sudden their words would snap him out of what ever he was in. He was a completely different person now. They just had to deal with it.
And it all started one week after the Battle of Hogwarts.
Their world celebrated victory and mourned the fallen. Weasleys weren't spared. He clearly remembered the unbearable silence that engulfed the Burrow in those days. There wasn't running up and down the stairs, Ginny wasn't shouting at him like he was the one to blame for every single thing that would go missing in the house. There was no sound of gentle scrubbing against the dirty dishes or clincking of the knitting needles. Their improvised Quidith pitch wasn't used and it looked like it'll never be again. All he could hear were queit sobs of his parents they would try to swallow every time any of them walked in the room.
He almost started hating his home.
She was the only one who could make it better. It wasn't because of anything wise she would say, though she did try. It wasn't because she knew when to hold his hand or when to kiss him. She was just there. She was Hermione. That alone was enough.
Harry was there, too. He had the weight of the world on his shoulders and enough guilt to last a lifetime, but he and Ginny were there for one another. Few times he heard them laughing, but they would stop after few seconds like on command. Ron always thought they made themselves stop out of guilt for letting it happen in the first place. He wished they knew that those few seconds were what gave him hope that one day they would all be able to do the same. He never told them that.
Ron remembered how Hermione didn't talk as much as she used to. In fact, she would be quiet for hours. He'd try to say something stupid just so she would at least look at him. Then he started doing stupid things so she would get angry. It didn't work. At nights, he pretended he was asleep and listened to her heavy sighs. He never said anything because somewhere deep down he knew she wouldn't want to talk about it. Or maybe he was just too afraid he wouldn't know what to say and that he would only make it worse. It was a long time ago and he didn't care about the reasons.
One night, as she lay on his shoulder sighs became sniffs. He felt his T-shirt go damp and before he knew it he blurted out her name. He said ' 'Mione ', actually. She stiffened and tried to lie, but there was no point. He wanted to talk, she didn't and theystarted arguing.
"Fine, you don't have to talk. But I love you and I just want to be able to help you, like you've been helping me".
It was probably the first time he managed to say something articulate and rounded without curse words and 'uhms'. The truth was he had planned it for days and given everything it turned out pretty well.
It became even better when she said it back.
She hugged him, then; held onto him for dear life and kissed him like there was no tomorrow. There didn't have to be, for all he cared. He tried so hard not to feel embarrased by the sound his heart made. When she timidly put her palm over it, a sudden realization hit him; why should he be afraid to let her feel what he couldn't say. It was like he matured in that moment, like he found out the ultimate truth. It's not like his palms weren't sweating anymore, he just didn't mind if she noticed when he touched her.
She didn't stop him when he did, so he looked at her... Terrified.
Her eyes weren't seductive, but they were unmistakably inviting. He starred at the corner of her lips waiting for it to move. Upwards, he hoped. She finally gave a small smirk and he chuckled. Wicked.
"Fair warning, Ron. I have no idea what I'm supposed to do" she said weakly.
And it was clumsy and bumpy. And yes, he accidently put his elbow on her loose hair, causin her to yelp and she did almost died laughing when he fell on top of her after she accidently kicked his knee. Minutes later, as they stared at the ceiling and giggled he was pretty sure that was how bliss felt. Then she cried a little. He held her close and told her he loved her again. When he asked he how she was feeling, she simply said 'Alive'. They fell asleep and after a long time he was looking forward to the next day.
He couldn't possibly know that she was going to tell him about her plans to go after her parents to Australia. Alone.
Ron called her mental and barmy. She then cried again and told him that what happened between them gives him no right to treat her like that. He spent the rest of the day apologizing, of course.
Upon hearning about her intentions the whole Weasley clan put an effort to convice her that it wasn't a good time. She finally agreed, but still insisted on visiting the Ministry to learn about her options and reversal of the Obliviate charm.
It was Wednesday morning when she left. She wore black blazer over gray knee-lenght dress. Her hair was put up in a loose bun and even though Ron thought she looked beautiful, he had to ask why she chose such formal attire.
"I plan on building a career there one day, Ronald. I don't think they would ever take me seriously if I showed up wearing a pink sweater and frizzy hair" she replied confidently.
"It worked for Umbridge" he mocked her.
"All the more reason".
That Wednesday, May 10th, was the last time he saw her. He bit all of his nails until afternoon and by nightfall Harry and Ron were at the Ministry while Arthur went to notify the Department of Aurors. They tried to speak with every single person that saw her that day. Kingsley had no information of her whereabouts even though he gave them full details about the course of their conversation. He sent them home and promised them they'd do everything in their power to find her.
None of them slept that night.
By tomorrow, every corner had a MISSING poster plastered on. He watched angrily as people approached them, read, shook and bowed their heads in apparent pain in disappointment.
They turned every stone, but she was no where to be found. Every possible tracing system failed. It was as if the Earth had swallowed her.
Before they knew it a month had passed.
They were all in the living room when Harry got back from the Ministry. He accepted the offer from Aurors to join their ranks and now he was there every day for consultations. He was tired, like every night, but this time there was something else. Ron knew he will never forget the look on his face.
Harry lifted his hand and held something wrapped in red velvet.
"They found her wand" he stated and swallowed.
He was staring back at Harry in disbelief. He saw faces distorted in pain out of the corners of his eyes and listened to their cries.
"They found her wand, Ron"
"Shut up" he said firmly.
"They tested it. It's hers" Harry continued in shaky voice as if having to spit it out.
"Shut up!" Ron repeated threatingly.
"They said there wasn't anything else. Just some... um, bl-... blood stains on the fl-" tears got to him and he couldn't finish.
"I SAID, SHUT UP!" Ron growled making every eye in the room attach to his red face and darkened eyes. He made a step towards Harry, snatched the package out of his hand and went up the stairs.
No one came to see him that night.
The next morning he climbed down and found everyone seated at the table.
"Tell Kingsley I'll accept the offer".
With that, he left the house.
From that day forward the only thing on her became to hunt down and punish what took her. He didn't know who was guilty, but to him every evil thing they came across served well; if guilty - good, mission acomplished, if not - great test subject to see if he could make them scream loud enough.
He became famous. A hero. Routhless, unforgiving hunter. People congratulated him at first. After a while they became too frightened to come near. Just ocasionally, someone would shyly say 'how they sleep better knowing he's out there' or 'You're so brave'... It's easy to be brave when you've got nothing to lose, he'd always reply.
Yet, there were tiniest threads hodling him together, keeping him from going over the edge. He'd ignore them and deny the fact that there's so much more he could lose. He does that most of the year.
But, sometimes memories come and he lets them take over. Then the old Ron lives. It usually happens in September when he buys something for her birthday and reads the story from her copy of 'Tales of Beedle the Bard'. Especially now...When September came early... Unexpected... Just to knock him down.
Just some comments about the chapter:
- first, I like writing dialogues and I have no idea how it turned out that I have put only few spoken lines in this one. I know that this kind of chapters are sometimes hard to read so I tried to keep my paragraphs and the chapter itself shorter.
- second, frist draft of this chapter had flashbacks which I decided to rewrite. I had a hard time picking out the right moments and keep it fluid, so I went with this approach. I hope it wasn't a mistake. *frown*
- third, don't worry about Weasleys. They are in there somewhere... I had to write this chapter like this because its purpose wasn't to retrace every step Ron took in the past four years.
- and YES... as Zalini mentioned in the review it will be a bit dark and depressing ( not pathetic, hopefully ) at first but it will lighten up.
- and YES, I know it's all a bit confusing right now but I don't plan to make this story too long, so you'll learn more soon.
Thanks for reading, folks.