Chapter 8.
Luckily the rain had eased up and it was now, quite simply, just a dark, cloudy night. Blake had been driving for a while and she was getting tired, it had been such a long day, but she knew this couldn't wait. Before her and Ryan had bought the house they lived in now, Blake lived in beautiful house in a pretty deserted street; but the main reason she loved her house so much was that it was only a 3 minute drive from Penn's house. Normally they'd spend most of their days together; sometimes the whole day was spent inside. But on the occasion when they were apart, sometimes she would just really miss him; so she'd get her stuff and drive over to his house and surprise him.
Blake opened the front door of Penn's house with her spare key.
"Guess who!" Blake dropped the keys on the table next to the door. She quickly made her way to the living room where she'd normally find him watching TV. He wasn't there.
"Penn?" She'd be lying if she said she wasn't just the tiniest bit worried. She tiptoed into various rooms of the house but he was nowhere to be found. Blake turned her head and glanced through the crack in the doorway between the kitchen and study area. She didn't expect to find him in his office since he rarely sat in there nowadays. But she was desperate to find him so she slowly pushed the gap open further and saw him sitting at his desk. His hand held a pen that he was tapping on a wad of paper. He had his headphones in and was clearly bopping away to some song. Blake breathed a sigh of relief and smiled as she glided over to him. Penn almost had a heart attack when he heard her.
"Oh my god, Blake! You scared the living shit out of me!"
"I'm sorry!" she stressed as she walked closer towards him. As his breathing returned to normal he slid his hands around her waist.
"What did I do to earn this lovely surprise?" Blake smiled as she slowly lifted her legs, one by one, and straddled him on his chair. "
I missed you?" A cute, childish grin appeared on her lips as she put her hands in his hair. He smiled in return; he loved how adorable his girlfriend was. He gazed into her eyes and then wrapped his long fingers around her neck and pulled her towards him. They kissed for what felt like hours, neither one making it anything more just enjoying the feeling of being with each other. Blake was the first to pull away and looked at him with a look that was only reserved for him, a look of love.
"You know how late it is right? Not that I'm complaining about you being here." Penn uttered.
"I know, I know." She fidgeted on his lap, to get into a more comfortable position. "But I wanted to see you. Is that okay?" Penn sighed.
"God, of course it's okay, Blake." He pulled her toward him but this time pushing her head towards his shoulder. She slumped down slightly so she was comfortably lying at his side. He played with her beautiful blonde locks as her fingers brushed against his chest.
Blake stepped out the car and slowly made her way towards his door for the second time that evening. It was if nothing else, a tad embarrassing. But she didn't care, this was something she had to do; and she felt a lot more confident than she did earlier on. Last time it had been out of lust and a sudden wave of emotion. This time she was more certain, she knew what she was doing and she wasn't going to run off this time. She'd had time to process her thoughts and although it felt a bit out of the blue on the surface, she knew these feelings had been swimming around inside her for weeks.
Seeing him in a coma was enough to break her heart and know that he was the only one that could put it back together. It's things like this that make you wake up, right? Make you realise what you want and that you'll do anything to get it. Maybe in a weird way Penn's accident was a blessing. Maybe it was what was supposed to bring them back together. Maybe…"Stop it, Blake" she uttered to herself. Blake raised her hand to the door, she was scared. Actually no, scared didn't do it justice; petrified would be more like it. She was shivering and Blake wasn't sure whether that was because of the cold weather or because she was as nervous as hell. But before she had time to settle on a judgement, the door swung open.
"Blake?" Penn was more than a little confused but he didn't have any time to think before she briskly walked past him into his living room. Her hands waving all over the place as she blurted out everything and anything she was feeling; Blake was always a bit of a rambler.
"And that's when I realised something." She turned to look at Penn; her eyes grew wider than usual as she stepped towards him. Blake smiled a little, knowing her words could change her life in an instant. In a good way. In a really, really good way. "I realised that I-".
"Hey Penn have we got any-...Blake!" Zoe came out from the kitchen holding a plate of some sort of weird sushi, her eyes had been locked on the plate she hadn't seen Blake in the room. Blake strained her lips into a forced smile.
"Zoe!" She said with a sarcastically upbeat tone. Blake nodded as she glanced over at Penn. His mouth was agape as he stared at her. He flinched his head slightly as a way of somehow apologising, without actually having to say it. Blake bit her lip as she continued to gaze at Penn. She was more than a little embarrassed and maybe even a little upset. Not that she had a right to be.
Penn's eyes were wide on hers and his mouth was still open ajar for a few seconds until he gulped it shut. Blake twisted in her spot, swung her arms around her waist slightly as she spoke; "Umm…I should get going. I heard about the accident yesterday, I uhh… I just wanted to make sure you were okay." She lied. Why had she lied?
"Anyway…I…I should umm…I should go." Blake stuttered. Penn looked at her defeated face.
Blake turned to leave as she slowly walked to the door. She was desperate to get out of there but somehow she walked slowly, almost as though she was allowing time for him to run up to her and grab her and kiss her and-
"Bye Blake!" Zoe shouted from the back of the room.
"Bye." Blake swallowed. Was he going to say anything? Penn was still speechless and hadn't said a word since she'd arrived. "Okay then." Blake's hand was on the door handle and as she pushed it down she turned her head towards him again.
She paused for a second "Umm...bye." She smiled a soft smile, but Penn could tell it was a broken one. He opened his mouth to speak, but before he had a chance to say goodbye; the door was shut. And she was gone.
Blake woke with the feeling of decisiveness on her shoulders. She needed to make a decision: go after Penn with everything she had or to let him be happy with Zoe. She hated how tempting the second option was. But it was; it was tempting. Wasn't his happiness more important than her own? I mean she was a...great influence on him, right? I mean sure he'd gotten back into smoking and looked unhealthily thin but who was she to judge. And appearances weren't everything; maybe she'd changed him on the inside. Maybe he was a better person now. Without her. Oh wow, I'm gonna have to let him go, aren't I? Blake thought to herself. As her words sunk in, she began to cry. Faint sniffs covered up the sound of a breaking heart. It was time to let him go, once and for all. Maybe she could be happy with Ryan. He was her husband after all. Decision made, Blake drooped out if bed and headed to the shower. It was a new day and it was time to change.
Later that evening Blake sat alone in the dining room; quietly munching away at her Chinese takeout. Ryan was away for the evening and normally she'd cook something for herself, but she really wasn't in the mood. Minutes later she heard a rather violent tapping at the door. Curiously she got up and slowly made her way towards it. She was always reluctant to open the front door, she knew it sounded stupid but sometimes she was still a little girl inside. Regardless, she grasped her hand on the knob and turned it open.
The opening of the door revealed him standing there. The harshly lit lamp in the porch highlighted all the features on his face. His brown eyes were glowing, his nose was slender under the light and his lips were tightly pursed together, like he was waiting to tell her something.
Blake's eyebrows squinted at the sight as she felt her heartbeats quicken.
"Can I come in?" Blake nodded in response as she moved away from the door to let him in. "We need to talk." Penn looked at Blake sincerely; eyes still wide and focused on hers.
"Penn you don't...if you're here about before, don't bother okay I was stupid and honestly don't know what I was thinking." Penn didn't believe any of it. She wouldn't show up at his place twice in one night for no reason. Especially when one of those times was to kiss him. The second, maybe it was unobvious for most, but Penn had felt her words floating around the air before she had a chance to say them. And from what he could tell they felt an awful lot like three simple words that when they were strung together could have overwhelming effect.
"Come on, Blake! You don't show up at your ex's house twice in one night just for nothing! Especially when one of those times..." He paused and inhaled a breath of air. "You kissed them."
The room fell silent and it seemed as though the world had stopped for a second. Although they were metres apart, they felt closer than ever. Both of them reliving in the moment that had consumed both their thoughts ever since it had happened. They could still feel it. She could still feel his hands on her waist and her back and the taste if his tongue in her mouth. He felt her body tightly pressed against his as her hands roamed in his hair.
Blake coughed in attempt to silence the awkwardness; which was, in reality quite clearly sexual tension.
"Can we just forget that ever happened please?" Blake smiled softly at him.
"I don't think we can just forget it, move on-".
"Look, you're with Zoe and you're happy. She makes you happy and I...I'm with Ryan and he makes me happy. So we're...we're both happy." Blake paused. "Apart." She looked down so Penn couldn't see the hurt in her eyes.
"Blake-". Penn attempted to get her to listen to him as he carefully stepped towards her.
"Penn." Her eyes dashed upwards to look him in the eyes. "Go. Be happy. With Zoe. I mean this, this was nothing, okay?" He tilted his head to indicate that it was a hell lot more than nothing. Blake flinched at his hard stare and slowly stepped towards the door.
"I'll see you." Blake opened the door and stood to one side so Penn could walk out freely. He reluctantly paced towards the door. He knew they still had a lot of things to talk about; a kiss wasn't just something you threw under the rug.
"Yeah." Penn fired a defeated smirk in Blake's direction as he dipped his head and he walked out the door. Penn was about 3 metres down the pathway when he turned to see Blake still watching him. Her blue eyes sparkled in the moonlight as she watched him leave. They were caught in one last glance, one last feeling of hope until it would all come shattering down when Penn turned his head to walk away. And with that he was no longer in her sight, she sighed as her head fell and hit the side of the door.
"I guess this was goodbye". Blake whispered under her breath. Tears filled in her eyes as she spilled out what she'd been longing to say to him for a long time now; "And I love you."
A/N: Unrealistic? Who cares anymore, this is the way it's going. And besides all fics aren't exactly what happened otherwise you wouldn't write them. They've all got certain adaptations to situations and since this hasn't even happened who are we to know if it's unrealistic? Maybe it's exactly what would happen! Haha, we don't know. But anyway please keep reviewing and let me know what you think of the flashbacks and stuff. Is there enough detail btw? Do I need to add more descriptions to the scenes, do you think? Can you see what's going on? Haha, if you get what I mean lol.