Author: Raven Shadowrose

Rating: M

Pairing: ?/?

Summary: Sequel to Epiphany, Jeff and Dixie are trying to have a baby, what happens when it is likely to be more difficult than they first thought?

Disclaimer: I do not know or own any of the characters from Casualty, any original characters and the story are my property and I do not give permission for either of them to be used.

A/N: This is a direct sequel to Epiphany, please read that first to understand this story :) Reviews are welcome :)

Thank you to BeethovenRIP, olivia. c. king1 and chan. nelson4444 for your reviews, I hope you enjoy this chapter

Chapter Twenty-Four.

Dixie sighed, the past couple of days had been very difficult, Jeff had told the kids that Lucy wasn't well, she'd stayed by his side and held his hand as he had told them. He hadn't told them what she had tried to do, only that she was unwell and the doctors were looking after her in hospital. Dixie admired Jeff's strength, he was being so strong through all of this. Alan was keeping them informed of any developments in her condition. Dixie wasn't sure what to think, Jeff was staying quiet over the whole thing, what he was feeling was a mystery to her. She'd tried to get him to tell her but he just clammed up, she'd resigned herself to waiting until he was ready to tell her. Dixie busied herself with putting Sophia's clothes in her new wardrobe, Jeff had banned her from putting the beds together, she was humouring him and doing as he asked. He would occasionally let her hold a bit while he put it together but that was all she was allowed to do.

Jeff checked the screws holding John's bed together, he didn't want it falling to pieces when John slept in it. He'd done the same with Sophia's bed too, he was glad that they had their own rooms, it wasn't healthy for them to share now that they were getting older. Having work to do helped him keep his mind off Lucy and what she had done, he was still feeling guilty, he should have known that she wasn't right, was he really that blinded by his hatred of her? Jeff got up and put the mattress on the bed, he was going to have to talk about this sooner or later but he didn't want to stress Dixie out. Dixie was pregnant and she needed to stay as relaxed as possible. He was doing all of the heavy lifting, he'd got the removal men to put the boxes and furniture in the right rooms but there were a few that had been put in the wrong place so he was shifting them about. His main concern was getting all of the beds put together, he wouldn't have Dixie sleeping on the floor while she was pregnant. He'd already put their bed together, shifting the furniture about into the right places within the room could wait until tomorrow.

Dixie sat on Sophia's bed, her clothes were away and the furniture was in mostly the right places. Dixie was relieved that they'd had the carpets fitted before they moved in. Sophia put her head around the door and Dixie looked at her. 'Hi Dixie, are you tired?'

'A little bit, it has been a long day for us all.' Dixie hugged the little girl when she sat down on the bed. 'Is daddy okay, he's been very quiet.'

'Of course he is, he's just had a lot to think about lately.'

'Is it about mum being in hospital?'

'A little bit, she is being looked after though, there is nothing to worry about.'

'I'm more worried about daddy, he seems sad.'

'Don't worry Sophia, your daddy is fine.'

'Okay, I'll give him an extra big hug later.'

'Good girl, why don't you go and find your brother and see what he would like for tea.'

'I will do.' Dixie watched Sophia jump off the bed and go to find John.

Jeff was putting the covers on their bed when Dixie came in. 'Oh, you've found the bedding, that's good, I thought we were going to be sleeping on a bare bed.'

'Yeah, I found it.'

'Jeff, is everything all right?'

'I don't know what you mean.'

'I've just told Sophia that her daddy is all right, I've convinced her and now you're going to have to convince me.'

'I'm just tired, that's all.'

'You're going to have to do a better job than that Jeff.'

'All right, it is everything with Lucy. I should have known that something was wrong with her Dixie, I'm a paramedic, I would have noticed that something was wrong in anyone else.'

'Jeff, blaming yourself is not going to do you any good.'

'Then who do I blame?'

'This is just something that happened, it is nobody's fault.' Jeff knew that Dixie was right, it wasn't really anyone's fault but blaming himself felt like the only course of action.

Dixie just looked at Jeff, it seemed as if he was determined to blame himself for every bad thing that happened in the world. She was determined not to let Jeff keep blaming himself. Dixie put her arms around Jeff and lay her head on his shoulder. 'Dixie, what are you doing?'

'Hugging you, is that a problem? You have some good things in your life Jeff and you need to remember that. Those kids of yours downstairs for a start, Sophia is beautiful and John is turning out to be a gentleman, you should be very proud of them.'

'I am proud of them, I always have been.'

'Then there is our baby.' Dixie put Jeff's hand on her belly. 'We have the scan on Monday.'

'I know, the baby will look like a baby by now.'

'Yes, he or she will.' Dixie felt Jeff's hand stroking her belly. 'Jeff, will you do something for me?'

'Anything princess.'

'Stop blaming yourself, please try, for me.'

'Okay, I'll try.'

'That's my Jeffrey.' Dixie was relieved that Jeff was going to try not to blame himself any more. 'Come on Jeff, the kids should have picked what they want to eat by now.'

'Do you want me to go out and get something?'

'Yes please love, the cooker is done but it has been a long day, I don't feel like cooking.'

'Put your feet up Dixie, I'll go and get whatever it is they've decided that they want.'

'You're a good man Jeff.' Dixie kissed Jeff and hugged him, she wondered how long the good mood he had acquired in the past couple of minutes would last.

Jeff took Dixie downstairs and made sure that she was sat on the sofa, they'd been busy all day and he wanted her to relax. 'Okay kids, do you know what you want to eat?'

'Fish and chips daddy, that's what we want.'

'Fish and chips Dix, is that okay with you?'

'Sounds lovely to me.'

'All right, I won't be long.' Jeff noted down what everyone wanted, he didn't want to forget anything. Jeff picked up his wallet and went over to Dixie and kissed her. 'I'll be back soon Dixie.'

'Take your time love.' Jeff smiled at Dixie and hugged the kids, he would try his best to keep his promise to Dixie that he wouldn't blame himself for everything that was happening.

Dixie hugged Sophia, John had gone upstairs to read his book, the young boy was still quiet but she hoped that he would come out his shell in time now that he had a more stable home life. Dixie made sure that John knew he could talk to herself or Jeff if he wanted to, that they would always listen to him. Dixie remembered that she had promised Jeff she would talk to Sophia about growing up, she thought that now was a good time. 'Sophia, did your mum ever talk to you about what happens to you when you grow up?'

'No, never.'

'Your daddy asked me to talk to you about it, is that all right?'

'Yes, I want to know what happens.'

'Your body knows exactly what to do, it is very clever and special. As you grow up your body will change, for instance you will need to start wearing bras as your chest develops. Hair will start growing under your arms and between your legs. Do you have any questions so far Sophia?'

'Will you take me to buy a bra Dixie?'

'Yes, when you need one.'

'What happens after that?'

'Your body will continue to change, you'll grow taller and gain a little weight, your hips will develop and your periods will start.'

'What's a period Dixie?'

'Every month your body releases an egg, that egg can make a baby, if that doesn't happen then the lining your body made to protect the baby breaks down and comes out in the form of blood.'

'Will it hurt?'

'It might hurt a little bit, sometimes your stomach muscles will ache as they are working harder than normal but you can take a painkiller for the pain.'

'How will I know when it is going to happen for the first time?'

'You might not know but when it does I will help you, your daddy and I will make sure that you have all the protection you need when your first period comes along.'

'Thank you Dixie.'

'You're welcome, is there anything else that you need to know? Any questions?'

'Not right now, if I have any then I will ask you.'

'Good, I am always here if you need to ask me anything.'

'I know, I hope daddy comes back soon, I'm hungry.'

'Me too Sophia.' Dixie hugged Sophia, she was quite pleased with how the conversation about growing up had gone.

Jeff put the bags down on the side. 'Dixie, I'm back.'

'Thank goodness, I am starving.' Dixie came through into the kitchen and looked at the bags on the side. 'It smells good, if I wasn't hungry before then I certainly am now.'

'Then I won't keep you waiting.' Jeff took some of the plates out of the box on the side and opened out the fish and chips onto them. 'Sophia, John, come on, food is ready.' Jeff heard the kids running down the stairs and into the kitchen. 'Take your plate of food and go into the lounge, you can eat in there for today but once the table is put up then we'll be eating in here.'

'Thank you dad,' John said and picked up his plate.

'Thank you daddy.' Sophia took her plate and followed her brother.

'You're welcome kids.' Jeff put his own chips onto his plate, Dixie was right, they did smell lovely and he was feeling hungry too.

Dixie heard her stomach growl, the smell of the food was making her feel very hungry, she followed Jeff into the lounge and joined him on the larger sofa. Normally she would have cooked but the move had exhausted her, there was still plenty of work to do but at least they had somewhere to sleep for the night. She didn't want to sleep on the floor as her back was aching and she had the odd twinge around her stomach area but that was due to her stomach stretching to accommodate her growing uterus. Dixie slowly ate her food, she wanted to enjoy it for as long as possible. Her feelings of nausea had been increasing lately, she felt lucky though, many people had a worse time with morning sickness than she was having right now. She was hoping that the feelings of sickness she was having would stop when she reached her third month.

Jeff put all of the plates in the sink when they had all finished, he was going to have to wash them by hand as the dishwasher wasn't ready yet. He left Dixie lying on the sofa, she was tired, it was a natural part of pregnancy, he would try and pick up some of the chores for a little while so that she could rest. He had hoped that they could leave moving until later on but the house had become available and they were offered it almost immediately. The move had been stressful but for the most part it had gone smoothly, they'd only really argued once when Dixie wanted to move something that he had thought was too heavy for her. Jeff knew that Dixie's hormones and the stress of moving were combining to make her irritable and prickly.

Jeff put the last plate on the drainer and went into the lounge. Dixie was sleeping on the sofa, she looked comfortable enough so he left her there. He put a blanket over her and kissed her on the head. Dixie wouldn't be able to sleep in their room just yet as the curtains hadn't been put up. Jeff quietly went upstairs, he would put the curtains up now, he really wanted Dixie in bed and resting. He picked up the curtains off the floor, attached them to the hooks and threaded them through the rings on the rail. Jeff checked the curtains were even and then drew them over, he was pleased with himself, Dixie would be able to sleep in their room now.

Jeff went downstairs and woke Dixie. 'Come on Dix, if you want to sleep then you can do that in our room.'

'I'm not asleep, just resting my eyes.' Dixie sat up and rubbed her eyes.

'Sure, you've never been able to convince me of that yet.'

'What time is it?'

'Just after nine.'

'I'll go to bed a bit later on, if I go now then I will wake up really early.'

'Okay, make sure you rest.'

'I will, stop worrying about me Jeff.'

'I know, you're an independent woman.' Jeff kissed Dixie on the head.

'Will you make sure the kids get to bed?'

'Of course I will, I'll be back soon.' Jeff kissed Dixie and went upstairs to help the kids get ready for bed, he couldn't wait to have the house in order and everything where it should be.