A/N: My dear reviewers, hannon le. I cannot even begin to say how AWESOME you guys are.
Disclaimer- I don't own Lord of the Rings. No really, it's true.
5. Drinking is never a good idea. Doubly so when you are a Mary Sue.
A briefing about what happened since we last saw the Fellowship:
The gang got into 'a spot of bother in a lot of snow', as the Mary Sue called it, and chose to travel through the mines of Moria. They fought off a pack of orcs and a cave troll, and came face to face with a Balrog. The Balrog was thrown into the abyss by Gandalf's powerful magic, and Gandalf jumped in as well, as a protest to the Mary Sue following them.
After much mourning over Gandalf's death and yelling at the Mary Sue, the Fellowship were led by Aragorn into the forest of Lorien.
They met the Lord and Lady of Galadrim. Galadriel looked into all of their minds (What she saw in the Mary Sue's mind: 'LeggyArry LeggyArry LeggyArry LeggyArry…Eww, this Gala-lady needs make-up, like, soooo bad…Her hubby looks stoned, tee hee… LeggyArry LeggyArry LeggyArry LeggyArry'). The Fellowship were welcomed graciously to Lothlorien despite you-know-who.
Now for the story:
Night had fallen in Lothlorien. The air was filled with sad, beautiful elven singing.
'What are they singing about?' whispered Sam, awestruck.
'A lament for Gandalf. I cannot tell you what it means, for the grief is still too...'
Suddenly the music and singing changed. It became angry and pissed off. Legolas gulped as he heard some Elvish curses in the song.
'Um… I think they are not too happy with us about bringing that wench here either.'
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A feast was organized to honor the guests. The dance floor was a spectacle and the food left the hobbits speechless. (It's hard to talk with your mouth stuffed full, anyway.)
Everyone was enjoying themselves when the inevitable happened.
The Mary Sue appeared.
The dress she was wearing had so many slits and lace that it looked like something Arwen or Galadriel would call lingerie. Not to mention that it was neon pink.
Two elleths rushed around the hall, handing everyone aspirin.
The Mary Sue looked around for Aragorn (who was hiding under a table) and Legolas (who had borrowed one of Galadriel's dresses and was pretending to be an Elf Maiden). Failing to locate them, she proceeded to dance with nearly every male Elf in the room.
She poured herself a glass of wine. Then a second glass, followed by a third. Then a fourth. A fifth.
The Mary Sue swayed on her lovely feet (Elven potent is very wine, you see.)
She looked around, her vision blurred. To her utmost delight, Legolas came towards her, holding out his hand.
'Come, you must go to your chamber.' he said gruffly. 'You are intoxicated.'
Giggling tipsily, she allowed him to escort her to her room.
When they were inside, the Mary Sue slowly closed the door…
…I'll spare you the 'details'(of which there were a lot. A lot.).
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The next morning, the Mary Sue woke up feeling great. Fabulous. In the seventh heaven of delight. She let out a long sigh. Oh that beautiful night…
She turned her head to look at her Legolas, who was also waking up.
Something was wrong.
'Good morning, lass.' Gimli grinned, throwing away a long blond wig and walked out of the room to collect the money Legolas owed him.
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A/N: Don't forget to review! :-D