Hello people!
thank you all again SO much for the reviews! this is the best response I've had to any of my fics so far, which is pretty awesome.
today is my birthday, which I am spending ALONE (for reasons that i will not bore you with) so reviews today of all days will be greatly appreciated!
DISCLAIMER: i do not own NCIS :( but as of today, i own a copy of Atonement! (the movie. not the book. havent read that. is it good?) :)
Chapter 3
It was 11 o'clock the next day when they final had a breakthrough in the case.
"Boss, you're going to want to see this," McGee said, taking out his headphones that he had been using to scan the CCTV footage from around the area. Kate and Tony picked that time to walk out of the elevator, having just returned from interviewing the deceased commanding officer and work colleagues. They had all said the same thing, that she had been a lively fun easy going kind of person until they were deployed. And then she had come back a different person. And none of them knew that she danced.
With the trip having been useless, the two of them were looking forward to some kind of breakthrough back at the office. McGee was not to disappoint.
"This," he said, hitting the controller to the plasma, "was taken from a traffic camera about 100 yards from the studio. Now zoom in…" he did so, and even though it was dark, McGee must have done some weird techno-thingy because they could clearly see the Lieutenant Commander leaving the studio. She pulled out a small bottle of pills, her shoulders shuddering violently as she cried, and tipping the bottle into her hand before throwing them back into her mouth. McGee fast forwarded the footage, and a few minutes later they saw her fall to the ground and not get up.
The team stood there, in their loose semi-circle around the plasma, all not knowing what to say. The evidence was as clear as day, the Lieutenant Commander had intentionally killed herself. But it was never easy, watching another person purposefully take their life, because they believed that they had no other option. And no matter how many suicides the team encountered, they still hit them hard. It was one thing dying a hero, dying because someone stood up for something. But someone feeling so alone, so desperate that this was the only option, it seemed like an even greater crime, not for the person, but for those surrounding them. For the rest of their lives, their friends and family would question themselves, torturing themselves with the "what if"s and all the possibilities. And that was never easy. At least with a murder, they had someone to blame. Without that, they would turn the finger on someone else. Possibly themselves.
The sound of Gibbs' phone ringing broke all of their gazes away from the plasma.
"Yeah, Gibbs," he said what he reached for his phone. The team noticed that his voice was not as harsh as it normally was, more soft and caressing the words. It was as if he was tired, tired of the job and tired of the emotional ties.
He nodded into the phone a few times, as if he had grown unaware of the fact that the person on the other end could not see him.
"Yeah, thanks Abs," he finished, and hung up. He turned to the group, "Abby matched the drugs in the Lieutenant Commander's system to the sleeping pills that she was prescribed."
The team let the information sink in. Gibbs saw how tired the whole team seemed to be, even though it was not even lunch time yet.
"Lunch break, be back by one," he said. He knew that they wouldn't be able to work, not in this state. If he gave them a break, maybe they would get some paperwork done in the afternoon.
The first place that Tony thought about going was to the studio to tell Ziva the news. He wished that he would be seeing her under better circumstances, but this was it.
When he reached the studio, the receptionist waved him in as he flashed his badge.
"She's in studio C," she said, and Tony sent her a nod in thanks. Had Kate or anyone else been there, they would have made a big deal about how he had not hit on the pretty blond receptionist. But now, his mind was preoccupied.
When he got to studio C, he found Ziva stretching on the floor in a dark emerald green leotard, pointing her toes and reaching to touch them.
"Hey," he said, starting of the conversation.
"Hello, Special Agent DiNozzo," she replied, straightening herself out, and gracefully moving to standing position.
"Tony," he corrected.
"Tony, " she repeated, and he may have been a little bias, but his name sounded far better coming out of her mouth than anyone else's.
There was an awkward pause as Tony tried to figure out how best to tell Ziva about the suicide.
"So, is there a reason why you are here?" Ziva said, getting sick of the silence. She was never one to beat around the bush, wanting to get to the point as soon as possible. Tony was not doing a very good job of it.
"I just thought you would have wanted to know," he started, his voice dropping solemnly, and Ziva knew that something bad was coming, "we found that the Lieutenant Commander had purposefully overdosed."
"She killed herself?" Ziva asked as if not quite believing him.
Tony just nodded and Ziva took a sharp intake of breath. She looked away from his enquiring gaze, and turned so her back faced him.
"Thank you for telling me," she said, keeping her voice level. Tony caught sight of her reflection in the mirrors, and she when she noticed this she turned her head to look away sharply.
There was a pause as Tony just stood there looking at her and Ziva tried her best to not look him in the eye.
"My next class starts soon, so if you don't mind…" she said again, looking towards the door as she said that. Her message was clear. Get out. And Tony could not do anything but listen to her, and leave. But that was not before looking back once over his shoulder, and seeing one tear drop from her eyes and onto the cold hardwood floor…
oooOOOooo
"Ziva! There is a cute looking police officer at the door looking for you!" Tali yelled down the hallway. It was seven in the evening, and as soon as Tony had finished his report and slapped it onto Gibbs' desk, he had been gone. He had found Ziva's address in some database that he probably shouldn't have been using for that purpose, and driven to see her. He did not want to leave the conversation that they had at the studio like that, and he was there to finish it, just as he wanted.
"What are you doing here?" Ziva said, as she got to the door, clearly surprised with his presence. And clearly not expecting visitors, wearing a huge sweatshirt with some dance competition emblazoned on the front, and baggy pyjama trousers.
"I thought I would drop by, see how you were," Tony said, trying to sound really casual about it. It didn't work.
"And how do you know where I live?"
"Background check."
Ziva gave him a look that said she found that a little creepy and weird.
"Which I totally have clearance to do, so…" he rewinded, but clearly Ziva was already not impressed.
"Are you busy?" Tony asked to switch subject.
"Actually, yes, we were about to eat," Ziva said quickly. Too quickly.
At that moment, Tali felt the need to intervene. There was clearly something going on between these two, and even though she had not forgiven Ziva for not mentioning this guy, she would be satisfied if they named their first child after her.
"He could stay for dinner?" she said, and both adults turned to look at her, leaning casually against the opposite wall to Ziva, "What?"
"I am sure Agent DiNozzo here has plans," Ziva said quickly.
"Do you?" Tali asked, crossing her arms defiantly staring at Tony. Tony found himself in a tricky spot, two pairs of beautiful brown eyes staring at him, one pair cursing him to the moon and back, one pair enticing him to come in. Following the first pair would have been the sensible thing to do. So of course, he didn't.
"If you will have me," he said, and Tali grinned, knowing that she'd won this battle. Ziva had to stop the immature eye roll that was inevitable, and Ziva knew that she had lost the battle. But the war was still up for grabs…
Ziva stood in the kitchen dishing out the food and inwardly grumbling to herself. When she had got home from the studio, all she wanted to do was flop onto her bed and cry herself to sleep. But she couldn't. She had to start a batch of laundry, and cook dinner for both of them, and now she had an additional guest to entertain. It did not help that he made her feel like some nervous school girl. Despite the fact that the case was closed, he still had not shown any sign of not caring. If anything the newly found closure had made him even more concerned for his wellbeing. She was humbled by his concern, but it made her feel small and weak. She did not need to be dependent on someone, especially someone who she had only just met. And yet, despite the fact they had just met, Ziva knew that there was something there, something more than respectful concern. But she did not want to be involved in that kind of thing. Between looking after Tali (who despite her age, would always be her baby sister), running the studio and the general running of the house, there was no room for anything or anyone else.
She could hear Tali and Tony's voices through the open door, and she prayed that Tali was not telling Tony anything embarrassing. That would make the situation even more awkward. Hurrying herself along, she picked up the plates, and turned around, just as Tony appeared.
"Woahh!" he said, as she steadied herself. She felt a sense of satisfaction to note that the food remained on the plates, as oppose to on the floor. That was nice.
"Here, can I get those for you?" he asked politely.
"No. but you may carry the glasses through," she said nodding to the cups on the side, and he did as instructed. Wise move.
"So, how does a guy like you become a cop?" Tali asked as they all sat at the table, spearing pasta onto her fork rapidly. There was nothing Ziva wanted to do more than sit in front of the television with some mindless TV junk to soothe herself. But of course, she couldn't. Instead she sat there, as Tali grilled Tony.
"What do you mean a guy like me?" Tony asked, mock offended, and Ziva noticed how he avoided answering the question. Interesting…
"Tall, handsome, American," and just as Tony began to look smug she continued, "arrogant, self assured, cocky…"
"Hey!?" he said indignantly. He did not deny it, but the truth did hurt.
"You pride yourself in knowing guys?" Tony asked Tali, turning the question back at her again.
"I know a few, the kind who walk up to you at clubs and try to do more than dance…"
"Tali! Why did you not tell me about this?!" Ziva said abruptly. She had been poking half heartedly at her plate of pasta, and had not really been listening to the conversation until that point. If anyone was giving Tali a hard time, she was going to hunt them down and…
"Because I knew you would freak?" Tali answered quickly. And then more to herself, "And Ari is bad enough…"
"Ari?" Tony asked, as he desperately tried to keep up with the tennis match of dialogue.
"Our older brother. Otherwise known as mother bear," Tali said.
"I'm going to tell him that you called him that," Ziva said.
"Bite me."
Tony tried his hardest not to laugh aloud. They were ridiculously close as sisters, and he could see that now.
"He's protective of you then?" Tony asked.
"The understatement of the century…" Ziva said, going back to poking at her meal. Tony was trying to include her in conversation, but she stubbornly refused to take part. Her sister, however did not have such an issue.
"So, do you have a girlfriend?"
"Tali!" Ziva admonished, and Tali shrugged.
"What?"
"No, I do not have a girlfriend," Tony answered.
"Boyfriend?"
Tony just gave her a look.
"Just asking…" Tali said, but she already had her answer. No gay man would be giving her sister the looks that Tony was giving Ziva now…
Fifteen minutes later, all the plates were devoid of food, and Tony leaned back on his chairwith a content smile on his face.
"That was amazing!" he said with feeling.
"It was just pasta…" Ziva said awkwardly, as she collected the plates to wash.
"Let me," he said, and before Ziva could protest he had collected all the dishes and was already in the kitchen.
"I'll leave you kids to it," Tali said, and she wandered off into her room, much to Ziva's dismay, and she was left alone with Tony.
She walked into the kitchen, and Tony already put on the rubber gloves and was dutifully starting on the washing up.
"You really shouldn't be doing that," Ziva said, trying to nudge him away with her hip as her hands were full. She however had not anticipated the strange feeling that she got when they made contact.
Tony was either oblivious to it, or a very good actor.
"I insist. I crashed your dinner, it is the least I could do," he said, and Ziva sighed in defeat. She would not have normally given in so easily, but today she was drained, physically and emotionally. So instead of arguing, she just flicked on the kettle.
"Coffee or tea?"
"Whatever you are having," Tony answered, not turning to face her, but putting the dish into the drying rack.
"What type of tea?" Ziva asked.
"What do you have?" this time, he turned around, and Ziva opened the drawer to show him what tea they had.
"Wow."
That was all he could say.
In the drawer lay a huge amount of tea, most still in the packaging, so easy to identify. However, he had not heard of half of the teas that were there, let alone what they tasted like.
"Tell you what," he said, "surprise me."
Tony turned around to go back to his duties. But if he had not, he would have seen the first real smile that she had smiled that day.
Ziva sat on the countertop sipping her cup of tea, as Tony finished up with the washing up. She handed him a steaming cup of something.
"Should we go outside?" Ziva suggested, thinking that the loud Washington skyline would swallow some of the awkwardness that was evident between them.
"Sure, lead the way," Tony replied, curious to where they were going.
His confusion was quickly answered when he followed Ziva through the living room and onto the balcony. There were a few potted plants littered around, all sprouting leaves and fruit that Tony could not name even if someone was pointing a gun at him.
"Do you plant these?" he asked, taking the first hesitant sip of the steaming liquid. Much to his surprise, the taste was vaguely fruity and slightly sweet, kind of like very diluted hot Ribena.
"No. Tali likes to grow fruit and vegetables. Something about air miles and the environment…" Ziva said, leaning against the railing and staring off into the evening sky. Tony almost didn't catch what she said because he was too busy watching her. She her long wavy hair was loose and blowing in the wind, the wind blowing in the right direction so instead of clouding her face, it cleared it so he could see her small elfin features perfectly. And with her standing there in her oversized pyjamas, he had never seen anything so beautiful.
"She seems like the kind of person," Tony said. Over the evening he had observed that Tali seemed young, but she was definitely a thinker. She had an opinion, whether that be on the environment or the government, and everything in between. She was definitely an intelligent kid. "Looks and books," he added, more as an afterthought.
"Are trying to push my sister?" Ziva asked sharply, and Tony had to think for a moment to understand what she meant.
"You mean "trying to pull your sister"?"
"So you are?" she said turning to him.
"Wait, no!" Tony said quickly, not liking that look that Ziva was giving him. She looked as if she could kill him several different ways, and was planning in doing so.
"Just to let you know, I can kill you eighteen different ways with a butter-knife, so do not try me," Ziva said, and somehow, Tony believed her.
"You can?" Tony asked, and when he got no reply he continued, "And where would you learn a skill like that."
"It is not important," Ziva asked quickly, again, too quickly, making Tony suspicious.
"You should really go," Ziva said turning away, and Tony knew that he had said something wrong. Why else would she kick him out by asking about her past?
"I am sorry," he said softly, so softly.
Suddenly Ziva turned around, maybe to apologise for her own behaviour. But she would never find out what she would have done for certain. Because when she did turn, Tony was gone, and she heard the front door close quietly behind him.
wow, that was long. :P leave a review on the way out, and i will be eternally grateful :)