A/N: Thank you for the reviews, everyone. (And sorry about the delays, I went from exam time to writing my dissertation time. Eeek!).

Housewarming presents

"What about Monica?" Rory walked in the kitchen, kissing Jess' shoulder. "Or Rachel?"

"No and no. No to Phoebe as well."

"Wait, we couldn't use Rachel anyway."

"Why?"

"It's Luke's ex girlfriend's name. I doubt mom would love me too much if we used it. Oh, Remy?"

"What?"

"There was a rerun of House on earlier."

"No." Jess shook his head. "And I thought I'd told you no more medical shows after last week."

"Don't worry, I checked before I watched it, there were no sick babies in that one."

"Good. I don't like coming home to you crying."

"Then you should quit your job and sit around the house all day so you can make sure I'm never alone and watch sad things." She smiled, picking up a carrot from the chopping board and starting to chew on it. "I swear though, the doctor they had in that episode looked so much like Lane it was crazy."

"Uh-huh."

"Fine, don't believe me. See if I care." She stuck out her tongue, laughing.

"Ror, I'm not allowed to have an opinion since I'm not allowed to watch the show any more. Not that I was a huge fan to being with."

"That's because you think Thirteen's hot and then I get silly."

"I think you're hotter." Jess smirked, leaning in and kissing her cheek.

"Not the point. I still don't like you liking other women."

"But she's on TV. I'd get it if we were talking about a real person but an actress…?"

"That's why it's silly."

"But you and your mother having half an hour long debates on how hot George Clooney is?"

"That's fine. We're making up for centuries of women's suppression."

"Right. My bad." Jess laughed, shaking his head. "I do however find it amusing that you don't like me finding Thirteen attractive, but naming our daughter after her is perfectly fine with your silly brain."

"That's different. I'm not entirely sure how, but it is." She giggled as well, shrugging. "Poor baby, your parents are crazy."

"Hey, I'm offended. I'm perfectly sane."

"Yet you voluntarily married me and work with Matt and Chris. Sane. That's what we're calling it these days."

"I make bad choices, but I'm sane." He smirked, kissing her quickly while his hand ran down her stomach. "And stop telling the kid otherwise, she'll believe you and then we'll be in trouble."

"We're already in trouble." She smiled back, placing another kiss on his lips. "You were making me dinner."

"Yes, I was. Now I'm not." He pressed her back against the counter, cupping her face in his hands. "Now I'm trying to distract you."

"But I'm hungry."

"Huh." He started tracing kisses down her neck. "How hungry?"

"Not that hungry." Rory laughed, circling his neck with her arms. Hearing her phone ring a few minutes later, she sighed, pouting. "I should get that."

"No, you shouldn't. You should let me continue to distract you."

"It could be important."

"It's probably not going to be."

"You're right." She smiled, running her fingers across his back. "They're insistent."

"Then it's probably your mother. Or your grandmother. Both of whom would be a buzz kill."

"And the phone constantly ringing?"

"Ignorable." Sighing when the phone kept ringing, Jess stepped away from her, placing one more kiss on her cheek. "Maybe not so much. Go answer while I work my way through the list of bad, bad words I know."

"While making dinner?"

"Yes."

Ruffling his hair, Rory stepped into the hallway, picking up her phone from the table.

"Hey, grandpa." She smiled, leaning against the kitchen table again, watching Jess as he started chopping the vegetables again.

"Hello, Rory."

"Sorry it took so long to answer, I couldn't find my phone." She lied, blushing slightly.

"Oh, it's fine."

"What's up?"

"I was just wondering if you're doing anything this Saturday."

"Not that I know of, why?"

"I'm coming to Philadelphia on Friday for business and a couple of old friends and I arranged to meet for dinner on Saturday night, giving me just enough time to take you and Jess out for lunch."

"Grandpa, you don't have to see us just because you're in Philadelphia. Don't add too much to your schedule."

"I'm sure even my doctor would agree that having lunch with my granddaughter and her husband isn't a particularly strenuous activity."

"Ok, but I will need to see the doctor's note." She joked, making the man laugh. "If you can swing it time-wise, we'd love for you to come see our house."

"I'm sure I can fit that in somewhere."

"You're welcomed to our spare room, but there isn't any furniture in it, so that probably won't help much."

"Oh, don't worry about it.

"You sure? Because I could figure som…"

"Rory, I'm fine."

"Ok." She nodded, smiling.

"Good. I'll let you go then and I'll see you both on Saturday. Say hello to Jess for me."

"Will do. Say hi to grandma."

"Of course."

"Good bye, grandpa."

"Bye."

Hanging up the phone, she put it back on the table, walking to Jess and ruffling his hair. "Grandpa says hi."

"Ok. What was that about?"

"He's coming to town on business and wants to have lunch with us on Saturday."

"Huh."

"What? I though you liked him." She moved away and he twisted his head to look at her.

"I do. I'm just wondering how you haven't realized yet that the second your grandmother finds out about this, she'll decide to come along."

"…Crap." Rory sighed after a few seconds of silence, laughing. "This means that…"

"We have five days to get this place white glove clean."

"More like four." Kissing him quickly, she ran her hand over his back. "It's ok, you don't have to do anything."

"You, pregnant." Jess looked at her stomach, smirking.

"You, overprotective." She stuck out her tongue.

"Me, helping."

"Ok, Tarzan. Whatever you want." Rory laughed before kissing him again.

"Grandma's coming as well." Rory sighed, sitting on the couch Tuesday night. "She called this afternoon and mentioned it."

"Huh. I'm shocked."

"You may say you told me so." She smiled, kissing him. "Could be worse, they could be staying here."

"That would be worse. Much, much worse. You're sure they're not?"

"Yes. She said their hotel isn't too far away from here." She nodded reassuringly. "I'm sorry about this."

"It's ok. You'll be the one dealing with them, I'll just sigh stoically through it."

"You can even pretend to be busy that morning at work so that you're spared the tour and the coffee and whatever else."

"Very self-sacrificing of you."

"Jess, they're my family. You put up with them more than enough as it is."

"You put up with me."

"You're amazing, it's not that hard."

"Nice. Are you feeling guilty over your grandparents' visit or did I just happen to be around in the 30 seconds you're on the sappy end of your emotional range?"

"You're a jerk." She slapped his back, sticking out her tongue.

"You change your mind every other minute whether or not you love me."

"I always love you, I just can't stand you at times."

"Oh, I apologize."

"And anyway, you got me pregnant, you have to suffer the mood-swings. I've been telling you that for months, you'd think it would have gotten through that thick skull of yours." She pointed out as he kissed her quickly. "Am I not nice enough to you? Do you want me to try harder? Because I really don't mean to be…"

"Ror, it was a joke."

"Sorry. I'm stressed about grandma coming." She shrugged, lying back against the couch. "And I can't even clean properly since I need to make sure Brett only has one head or something."

"But you're ruining her circus freak career."

"You're silly."

"What, she could start making money right away instead of having to wait until she grows up. She could support us."

"I'm going to stop listening to you now." Rory laughed, looking at the door. "I'm going to go dust upstairs."

"Does this mean I need to start cleaning?"

"Can you do the windows?"

"Sure."

"Do you hate me?"

"I'm not cooking all week."

"OK." She nodded, waiting for him to stand up before extending her arms. "Help the whale."

"Buckets of water until we can get you back in the ocean?" He smirked, taking her hands.

"Hilarious, that's what you are."

"Oh, I know."

"Hey!" Rory greeted her grandparents on Saturday morning, stepping aside to let them in the house. "Come in."

"It's good to see you, Rory."

"You too." She hugged her grandparents quickly while Jess watched, trying not to let his discomfort show. "Through here." She pointed to the living room, letting the older couple walk ahead before taking Jess' hand and following them. "Can I get you some coffee or something?"

"Coffee sounds good, thank you." Emily smiled at her granddaughter, looking around the room.

"Grandpa?"

"Yes, coffee does sound very good." The man agreed and Rory tried to move but Jess stopped her, a slight shake of his head.

"I'll get it, you stay here."

"Thanks." Turning back to look at her grandparents, she smiled again. "You want the tour while we wait? I did invite you over to see the place and, while showing a picture slideshow could be a suitable alternative, we can just go for the live action version." She finished with a grin and Emily nodded, still smiling.

"The tour would be lovely, Rory."

"Ok. So…this is the living room." Rory laughed. "The yard's through here."

"And this is the baby's room." Rory finished the tour, leading her grandmother in the room. "We were going to leave it pink but I'm starting to change my mind. Not sure. Maybe. Thinking about." She rambled, standing next to the crib. "I can't even make up my mind on bedding for the poor kid, I doubt we're going to make any progress with the walls any time soon."

"I'm sure whatever you chose will look good, Rory." Emily smiled, looking around the room.

"Aw, thanks."

"The crib isn't as bad as you made it sound either."

"Thanks." She replied again, this time sarcastically. "Do you want to go steal grandpa away from the books and finally have that cup of coffee that I promised you eons ago?"

"That sounds fine."

"Let's go." She lead Emily downstairs, tilting her head towards the living room when they got there. "Go have a seat, I'll be there in a minute."

Nodding once, the woman headed for the room and Rory walked in the office, finding her grandfather standing in front of the bookshelves, looking at the books.

"Having fun?"

"Your book collection is quite impressive, Rory." The man took his glasses off, after putting the book in his hand back on the shelf.

"Having a husband that publishes books helps with that particular addiction." She smiled. "I'd offer to loan you whatever you wanted, but I've seen your books. I know you have most of these."

"I appreciate the thought." Picking up one of the books, he looked at it before looking back at Rory. "I've never seen his one though. I realize I'm old, but I don't think I'm that easily offended by literature that neither you or Jess wanted to tell me about some of the books he writes."

"Oh…" Blushing, Rory bit her lip, looking at the book. "That wasn't really…I mean…it's nothing. Just something Jess wrote for me and then put it in book form. It was never sold or anything."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to intrude in your personal things."

"Don't worry about it. I promise I'll tell you about anything else he writes. I like to brag about him." She smiled affectionately, unconsciously rubbing her wedding ring with her thumb. "Coffee's ready." She looked at the door and the man nodded.

"And Emily and Jess have been left alone for long enough?"

"That may be my biggest concern." Rory giggled before walking out of the room, Richard following behind her.

"Christ, your grandmother is exhausting." Jess sighed, rubbing his temples. "I think she set a new record for passive aggressive jabs an hour."

"She was in fine form." Rory agreed.

"Did she say anything about the spare room?"

"No." She shook her head. "It wasn't anything more than a quick look, so hopefully she won't focus too much on it. And I did end the tour with Brett's room, so she could have something else to think about."

"Lorelai will be proud of you."

"I learned everything from her." Rory smiled, running her hand down his leg. "Did I apologize enough to you?"

"No." He smirked, looking at her. "Get naked, really make it up to me."

"Who says romance is dead?" She rolled her eyes, trying not to laugh and Jess leaned closer, cupping her face in his hand and placing a quick kiss on her lips.

"Well, you know, I try my best."

"Yes, you do." Placing a kiss on his palm, she smiled, glancing at the door. "You want me to go make you coffee or something?"

"You're feeling that guilty?"

"Oh, you have no idea. You could probably get away with getting me to do anything you wanted for the next few days. She wasn't very nice to you."

"She never is. And just how exactly are we defining this 'anything'?"

"Anything." She smiled, biting his lip gently.

"Huh. They should come visit more often." Jess smirked, resting his hand on the back of her neck, holding her place as he covered her mouth with his.

"I am so, so sorry." Rory stepped in front of Jess as he walked in the house on Monday afternoon. "So sorry. And I didn't know anything about it until they called and then I tried to stop her but I couldn't and I am sorry and please don't divorce me."

"Stop." He put his hands on her arms, stopping her monologue. "I'm going to need more details here."

"Before you decide if you're divorcing me?"

"I'm pretty sure I'm not divorcing you."

"Only pretty sure?"

"Ror, focus."

"Just remember you love me and I am not to be held responsible for my crazy family." Taking his hand, she started leading him up the stairs. Standing in front of the door to the spare room, she looked at him, mouthing "Sorry" before closing her eyes and opening the door to a now fully furnished room.

"Your grandmother?"

"Uh-huh. The delivery guys called while I was at work and they really wouldn't take no for an answer.."

"Grandma, you can't buy us furniture!"

"You're supposed to greet the other person when they pick up the phone."

"Hello. You cannot buy us furniture!" She repeated, still angry.

"You can exchange it if you don't like it. I can arrange to have someone pick it up."

"I haven't even seen it yet, I'm still at work. It's not about the furniture itself, it's about the gesture."

"What about it?" Emily asked.

"It's our house. Mine and Jess's. It's our responsibility to furnish it, not yours."

"So people are not supposed to buy their loved one presents? Housewarming presents are nothing new, Rory."

"Then get us a plant, not a bed!"

"You didn't seem to mind it in college."

"That was different. You were paying for Yale, I couldn't say no."

"Oh, so you did me the favor of letting me spend thousands of dollars on your furniture."

"Grandma, that's not what I meant." Rory rolled her eyes in frustration.

"What did you mean?"

"Just that that was a different situation." She sighed, shaking her head. "I have a job. So does Jess. We can afford to buy all this stuff for ourselves now."

"No one is doubting that. I just wanted to do something nice for you."

"A new set of towels is something nice. Furniture is over the top."

"You got plenty of towels at your wedding."

"I'd mention the plant again but it seems pointless."

"I just don't understand what's so horrible about me trying to make sure you and Jess don't uselessly waste money that you could be saving for your daughter."

"Grandma, I didn't say it's horrible."

"So why am I not allowed to do this for both of you?"

"Fine. Whatever." Rory conceded, starting to feel guilty.

"Good. I'll see you Friday night." Emily announced before hanging up the phone, leaving her granddaughter staring dumfounded at the computer screen.

"And then your mother mocked you falling into that one?" Jess remarked as soon as Rory finished her story, smirking.

"Oh, yeah. One of the many things grandma is great at is guilt tripping everyone until they feel like dirt for even bringing it up in the first place."

"At least you tried." Jess kissed her cheek, shrugging. "Fuck it, at least we don't have to buy it now." He sat down on the edge of the bed and Rory walked to him, running her fingers through his hair.

"You're not mad?"

"I'm surprised it took her this long to start ignoring us on this. I don't like it, but it's done and I don't have the energy to fight it."

"But you said they're not allowed near this place because they would do this. Jess, I can fight with her over this on Friday. I'm sure I could get through to her in person."

"I'm sure you couldn't, but that's beside the point. Seriously, screw it, it's a spare room, I don't care."

"Promise."

"Your mother is unbelievably frustrating at times, kid." Jess smirked, kissing her bump. "Promise. I don't care." He repeated, shrugging.

"At least now mom has furniture if we want her to come help with the baby after she's born."

"Your mother's staying with us?"

"No. She just offered. I said no."

"Ok. She can though. If you want her to."

"No." Rory shook her head, smiling. "I think we need to learn how to do everything by ourselves. But I reserve the right to have a breakdown in the middle of the fifth sleepless night in a row and call mom over to help."

"Sounds fair." He smirked, nodding. "So, you know how you were doing anything to make it up to me for your grandmother's visit?"

"Yes."

"Can I suggest messing up this nice bed of hers as part of that?"

"Only because I owe you."

"I don't really care about your justifications." He smirked, pulling her down on the bed next to him.