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Ladies, gentlemen, sorcerers, warlocks, and variations thereupon; it's time to play SPOT THAT REFERECE! First one who can correctly find the references and name the Fandom wins a box of virtual Chocolate Frogs! (Btw, that is NOT the reference.) You will also be granted a shoutout on the next chapter's Author's Notes. May the odds be ever in your favor! (that's also not the reference…)
This last chapter's winner was again Alligates for spotting the reference from Iron Man 2. The quote went: Make god bleed, and people will cease to believe in him. You go girl!
This time there are two references, one from a MOVIE and one from a BOOK! Happy hunting!
Super extra bonus brownie points if you can find the Bible verse hidden in here…
oOo
It was late. Very late. Merlin knew he would regret this when tomorrow came, but for now, like the past two nights, Merlin sat near the fire, occasionally poking the smoldering embers, but mostly just staring into the flames, thinking.
Anxiety sat heavy and choking on his chest. The other Knights badgered him endlessly about it for that first day, but when Percival saw how badly the pressure was affecting Merlin, he pulled Arthur to the side for a quick word. None of the knights said anything since.
Merlin sighed and pulled the amulet from under his shirt, where it had rested, a constant reminder of the choice he had to make. The deep red stone glittered in the orange light of the low fire.
A voice startled him out of his reverie.
"Merlin?" asked Leon. Merlin's head whipped around to see the knight getting out of his bedroll. "What are you still doing up?"
Merlin rolled the amulet around in his hands. "Just…couldn't sleep I guess."
Leon settled beside him, and said, "The same for me. Are you still thinking about that?" He gestured to the glittering object in Merlin's grasp.
"Yeah, I-" Merlin sighed, "Leon, what's your biggest secret? The thing you're most ashamed about? You don't have to tell me, just think about it." Merlin paused to let the older knight gather his thoughts. "Now," Merlin continued, "think about telling Arthur. And Percival. And Gwaine. And Elyan. And me. But make that secret something terrible. Something you would never tell anybody. Now you know why I don't want to show you."
Leon sighed and ran a hand through his dark blond curls. "I see. Well, you're faced with a conundrum there, Merlin. Because now, all of us know you have some sort of secret. Don't you think that Arthur is going to think about that every time he wants to confide in you—I know he does. More than with the rest of us, at any rate. Are you willing to let his imagination run wild? What if he starts thinking, I don't know, you're a sorcerer or something?"
Merlin's eyes flashed to his face, shock written in his eyes for just the slightest second, but Leon was looking into the fire, and didn't notice.
They sat in silence for a while, each mulling over their own thoughts, before Leon clapped him on the back. "Just think about it, alright? If you truly do not wish to share with us, then don't. But Arthur is driving himself crazy over this. One day, he's going to need to know."
"Yeah," Merlin whispered, "he does."
oOo
When the small company had arrived home to Camelot, Arthur was welcomed home rather enthusiastically by his Queen. He kissed her soundy, and then began to go through the list of all the things he needed to do now that he was home. "Merlin, I need you to- where's Merlin?" Arthur looked around for the dark hair and bright neckerchief, but they were nowhere to be seen.
A servant—Jacob, his memory supplied—stepped forward to take his reigns, and said, "Merlin's left to see Gaius, Sire. He said to tell you he would come and pick up your gear to be cleaned later tonight. We'll deal with the horses for you."
Arthur nodded, "Thank you, Jacob."
"Sire,"
"Yes, Jacob?"
"He said for- for me to call you a p-prat, Sire."
oOo
"-and now I don't know what to do! I'm damned either way, Gauis! If I don't show him, I am treated with suspicion for the rest of my days, and he'll never trust me, and if I do show him, he'll burn me at the stake! What kind of choice is that?"
Merlin was pacing around Gaius's chambers frantically, running his hands through his hair, making it stand up and making him look even more frazzled than he already was. He groaned and fell onto a bench at their table and buried his head in his hands. "What do I do, Gaius?"
Hearing Merlin sound like this hurt Gauis's heart. The boy was like a son to him, and all Gaius ever wanted to do was protect him from pain. The physician had taken a seat rather quickly when Merlin began to tell his tale, and he was sure his face was white as bone now. Just the thought of someone putting Merlin through that made a rage rise up in him like he hadn't seen in years, but more than that he was just tired. Tired of everything that he had to watch and not take part in, but let Merlin suffer on his own. I am too old for this, Gaius thought.
"I don't know, my boy. If I were you, I would probably let Arthur see it, and the knights too. But this is your decision."
Merlin snorted at that particularly helpful piece of advice.
"I mean it Merlin. I cannot make this decision for you. I am not you. I don't fully understand what those memories contain. As I fully do not understand the workings of the relationship between you and Arthur." Gaius stood and placed his hands on his ward's shoulders. Merlin leaned into the comfort. "I will stand beside you and protect you no matter what happens. The truth will come out one day Merlin, whichever day you choose that to be. But do you really think that Arthur will be able to unite Albion if he doesn't understand all that you have done for him?"
Merlin took a deep breath, and stood, hugging Gaius. When he pulled away, a fierce determination settled on his face. "I know what I'm going to do."
oOo
Arthur strode through the castle, cloak billowing out behind him, as he made his way to the council room. Just a few minutes ago, a messenger had poked his head into Arthur's rooms, after politely knocking and waiting for a response, and said that there was an "urgent assembly of the Round Table. I was told you would understand what that meant, my lord." So off Arthur went, hoping that this time, it wasn't Morgana, it wasn't certain death, and it wasn't something that he would lose sleep over.
However, if this was the result of Gwaine's most recent drinking binge, Arthur might have to let him take Merlin's honorary place in the stocks.
Arthur flung open the doors, and walked briskly to his seat at the head of the table, where the rest of the Round Table were already assembled. He was met by a cacophony from knights.
"Arthur, what's happening?"
"Is Morgana-"
"-just told to come, and now-"
"Where's Gwen, is she-"
Arthur clapped his hands onto the table, and proclaimed in his 'kingly' voice, "Quiet!" When the room fell completely silent, he said, "Does anyone want to tell my why the reunion with my Queen was cut short?" His sharp eyes darted from face to face, and when no answers were forthcoming, he asked, "Well? Anyone?"
"I called this meeting."
Arthur and all the knights' heads turned to the door, where Merlin was standing, his straight backed, resolute posture only marred slightly by the shaking in his hands. He took a few quick steps into the room and tossed a glittering object on a chain, where it slid to a halt in the middle of the table. The amulet.
All eyes were on Merlin, but he stared straight at Arthur. "I've decided to show you what's in here. It's only fair, after all." His breathing was just a bit too erratic, and his tone a bit too light to be convincing. Everyone knew Merlin was panicking inside.
Arthur took a seat. "Are you sure, Merlin?"
The young manservant exhaled and said, "If I don't do it now, I never will."
Elyan spoke up. "How many memories are inside that thing? How long will it take?"
"Oh, there's a fair few," Merlin said. "There's no possible way we can see it all tonight. I just mean to get us started on the first set. I just ask one thing of you."
Everyone waited for Merlin to continue.
"Don't think any less of me."
That is not what they were expecting. Gwaine, startled, began to shout, "Of course we wo-"
"No!" Merlin said sharply. "Don't just say that. I need you all to promise that you won't jump to conclusions about me, that you'll think before you do anything…drastic. Especially you, Arthur."
Blue eyes met blue eyes as Merlin waited. Arthur nodded.
Merlin reached for the Amulet.
oOo
The magic swirled around them, making the room around them transform into the scene from Merlin's memory.
A young Merlin was making his way over a sandy hill. As Merlin walked the well-worn path, he caught a glimpse of parapets in the distance.
"God, mate," whispered Gwaine, "You're so young!"
Merlin smiled despite himself. "This was the first day I ever came to Camelot."
Merlin had arrived in Camelot. He walked along the market place, taking everything in, a look of amazement on his face.
Percival laughed quietly, "Country boy. I did the same thing."
Overlooking the palace courtyard, Uther was addressing the crowds.
Arthur looked pained at the image of his father, so bright, vibrant, and alive. It had been such a long time since he saw his father look that way.
"Let this serve as a lesson to all. This man, Thomas James Collins, is judged guilty of conspiring to use enchantments and magic. And, pursuant to the laws of Camelot, I, Uther Pendragon, have decreed that such practices are banned on penalty of death. I pride myself as a fair and just king, but for the crime of sorcery there is but one sentence I can pass."
Morgana looks down from her window.
The newer knights—Elyan, Percival, and Gwaine—gasped in shock and reflexively reached for their swords.
Arthur's look of pain deepened when he remembered how close they used to be, like brother and sister before they even knew it, contrasted with her hatred of him now.
Merlin's heart felt guilty when he remembered what exactly made her change. My fault, he whispered to himself.
The man is forced to his knees, and then on Uther's signal, the man is beheaded.
Merlin flinched.
Elyan saw the flinch. "That was the first thing you ever saw in Camelot?" Merlin nodded.
Morgana looked away along with the many of the crowd.
"When I came to this land, this kingdom was mired in chaos, but with the people's help magic was driven from the realm. So I declare a festival to celebrate twenty years since the Great Dragon was captured and Camelot freed from the evil of sorcery. Let the celebrations begin!"
"He's calling for a feast right after an execution? Who does that?" Gwaine asked.
"Have care with how you speak. He was of Camelot, and he was my father," Arthur snapped.
With a shriek, an old, weathered woman who they all knew to be Mary Collins appeared.
"There is only one evil in this land, and it is not magic! It is you! With your hatred and your ignorance! You killed my son! But I promise you, before these celebrations are over, you will share my tears. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a son for a son!" she wailed.
Arthur's eyes widened "Nobody told me she announced it like that!"
"Did you expect us to, Sire? Uther did not want to truly acknowledge the danger your life was in." Leon countered.
"She was right," murmured Merlin.
"What?" cried the room.
Merlin backtracked hastily, "No, not about killing Arthur, gods, no. Just that Uther's justice did nothing but bring trouble down upon Camelot."
"Seize her!" Uther shouted.
Then Mary Collin screeched words of magic and disappeared in a flash of smoke.
Everyone (but Merlin) looked astonished at the blatant display of magic.
Merlin then walks through the castle and sees the guard.
"Where would I find Gaius, the- the court physician?" asked Merlin.
The guard pointed Merlin in his direction. Merlin knocks on the door and enters Gaius' quarters and looks around.
"Hello?" Merlin calls out.
He wanders into the room. Papers, books, bottles, and jars cover every available surface, and a nice fire burned in the hearth. Potions bubbled over fires.
Merlin smiled at the familiar scene, but then his heart dropped and his veins turned ice cold at the memory of what happened next. This is it. Oh god.
'Hello? Gaius?' calls out Merlin.
Arthur looked strangely at the real Merlin, who had gone pale and started to hyperventilate.
Gaius is standing on a ladder in a bookcase, but, started by Merlin's voice, he looks around then falls backwards off the ladder, breaking through the railing at his back.
"No!" cried everyone.They were all fond of the gruff old man, and, even though they knew he survived, it seemed impossible.
Then the unthinkable happened.
Merlin's eyes flood with gold, and Gaius's fall seems to slow, leaving him hanging in midair. Merlin looks around, then sees the bed in the corner, and his eyes glow again as the bed slides across the floor underneath Gaius's suspended form. As Merlin's eyes flash one more time, Gauis begins to fall again, but this time onto the safety of his bed.
Merlin quickly wills the memory to stop, and waited for the backlash.
The room was utterly silent. It seemed that no one drew breath. The scene around them was paused onto Merlin, his eyes still golden, with Gaius falling onto the bed.
Merlin stared resolutely at the floor, shaking all over, feeling all five pairs of eyes bore into him.
After a few moments, Arthur broke the deafening silence. "You- you have…"
"Magic? Yeah, I do."
A thousand emotions were running through Arthur's head. Shock- Merlin can't be a sorcerer! He's Merlin! Betrayal- He lied to me. I can't believe he lied to me. Everyone has lied to me! Anger- what right did he think he had, to come to Camelot and practice magic! Fear- He's a sorcerer. He's a sorcerer! He could kill me, kill us, kill Gwen! Have to protect Camelot! Indecision- He's my friend, he's Merlin. Merlin's not evil… Sorrow- there goes another friendship, ruined by someone who just wanted to use him.
Every conversation, every ill- concealed lie, every time Merlin mysteriously vanished, every time a stroke of luck just happened out of nowhere, all of it flashed through his mind. Was all of that a lie? Was Merlin just another faceless evil come to steal, kill, and destroy?
"You have magic."
Merlin looked up at Arthur's face, carefully schooled into a blank expression. "Yes." He whispered.
"You."
"Yes."
Anger now built up in Arthur, blotting out every other emotion. "You have magic! You come to Camelot, commit treason, for what? To kill me? Is this a plot? You've been working with Morgana against me all along!"
Merlin's eyes widened at the accusations. "No, Arthur, I would never! You must know that! Never, never, have I done anything to hurt you Arthur! If you can't see that, you're a bigger prat than I thought!"
Arthur just stared at his manservant for a moment, then said, with an air of incredulity, "How dare you!"
Merlin's blue eyes flashed - not with magic, but with anger. "How dare I? How dare I?! No, how dare you, Arthur, for treating me like some criminal, after I've been hunted, after I've been hurt- No, Arthur, how dare you for not seeing everything I've done for you, and all I have lost."
And the tears that had been threatening to spill from Merlin's eyes fell.
And so did all of his hopes for Albion.
He knew it, he just knew that Arthur would react like this! Why did this have to happen now? They were so close, so close, and Merlin had ruined it.
"I have given everything. Everything! My family, my safety, my home, my love! I have given everything for you Arthur! For you!" Merlin was hysterical now, tears running unrestricted down his face, voice rising, breathing harsh and erratic. "I r-risked my lif-fe so many times, I've done so m-much—this is what I get?! H-hatred, rej-jection, and persecution?"
Merlin abruptly threw his hands in the air, "I can't do this anymore! I can't deal with everything. If you want to kill me, Arthur, just do it. Just make it quick." And Merlin, steeling himself for what was to come, knelt before Arthur and squeezed his eyes shut, waiting for the blow to fall.
oOo
Alligates, that was for you. Mwahaha! *kate wears Morgana's smirk*
That really was evil wasn't it? But I am soooo good!
So ladies and gents, once you all put away your knives and pitchforks, I has a question. Which scenes are you particularly looking forward to and why? How would you like me to approach them?
Follow, Favorite, Review! It's kinda the best part of my day.
DOCTOR WHO EPISODE TOMORROW YOU GISE DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND IT'S THE 50TH ANNIVERSARY OF DOCTOR WHO AND MATT SMITH IS BACK AND I CAN'T WAIT BECAUSE THEY ARE PERFECT AND JUST AASFADF;KLFJ'DKFJ.
If you're a Whovian, 1) you're amazing! Brilliant! Fantastic! 2) PM me and tell me what you think of "Bells of St. John." I can't wait to hear your opinions!
You Know You Wanna Be Kate!