So since school is officially out I am going to be hopefully updating faster. This chapter is a big I'm sorry for taking so long with the last one. It took so long due to the end of the school year. I had to try and bring up grades and worry about finals, I'm pretty confident in them all except science since I really did not get it but I'm pretty sure I did a decent job. I'm also super confident that I got an A+ on my History final. Thank You Hetalia, I kid you not, I used Hetalia in my notes. Every time a countries name came up I drew their flag and on stuff like the Franco-Prussian war I drew a picture of Prussia Kicking France's butt. SO yeah anyone who says anime is not productive in the least ,tell them they can leich mein Arsch cause It helped me get a kick ass grade on my history final.

So anyway, enough of my rambling; on to the Story!

Here you go: Chapter 9 ^-^

Chapter IX

Matthew's POV

I stay tense until we pull away form the store. Gil is giving me concerned looks the whole time.

"Hey, you okay, Birdie?" he asks after we're a little ways from the store.

I jump a bit in surprise and nod my head yes.

"You sure? You seem really tense. You want me to take you home?"

"No, I'm okay. I'll be fine," I assure him, though I'm attempting to assure myself at the same time.

"Okay, if you insist. Hey, you wanna sleep over at my house tonight?"

I pause to think about it for a moment. No one's ever invited me to sleep over at their house before, but I decide that I don't want my time with him to end yet.

"I'd love to, Gil. I'll just need to give my parents a call so they know where I am."

"No problem," he says.

I use my cell to call Francis and leave a message on his voicemail saying that I'll be spending the night with a friend. When I finish, we're already at Gil's street and pulling up to his house. We enter to find Ludwig and Gil's grandfather in the kitchen.

"Hey, Vatti! Can Matthew sleep over here tonight?" Gil asks him with his usual cocky grin plastered across his face. His grandfather looks at me for a moment before turning back to Gil.

"Das is fine. Just behave and don't stay up too late," he says finally.

"Danke Vatti!" Gil grins wide and drags me down to his basement.

The basement has been transformed into a large game room with a huge television hooked up to an Xbox, Wii, and PS3. There's even a karaoke system hooked up to it. There's a huge couch, about20 bean bag chairs, and even more large pillows scattered all over the floor.

~~~Several hours later~~~

After getting my butt kicked in Modern Warfare 2, Gil kept snipping me from the tower on a map called Rust- we switch to Super Smash Brothers Brawl. This is a game that I'm actually really good at when I use the character Pit.

After a while of Kicking Gil's butt up and down every stage in the game, we take a break.

"Man you're good, Birdie. How'd you get so good? Surely you've got some kind of secret," Gil asks me, relaxing back on his couch.

I relax back into the large bean bag I'm sitting in and shrug. "I play it with my brother sometimes and I only ever use Pit, so I have his moves memorized and have gotten really good at using him," I tell him.

"That's awesome, Birdie."

We sit for a bit in a comfortable silence. It's only broken when our stomachs decide to growl at the same time, creating a grumbling harmony. We laugh and Gil suggests we get something to eat. I agree, and we head up to the kitchen in search of food.

Gil grabs a root beer and offers me one, but I turn it down and just have water. Gil heats up some kind of German sausage that he calls wurst and tosses me a roll of bread. We head back down to the basement with our food and start to eat.

"So tell me some more about yourself, Birdie. I hardly know anything about you, besides what you told me earlier at the mall. I want to know more," Gil tells me as we settle in to our previous seats.

I think for a moment before saying, "Well, there's not much more than what I already told you. I'm Canadian, I love hockey, I'm a good cook and according to my brother my pancakes are heaven on Earth, and I think maple syrup is the source of all happiness in life."

"I still have no idea what Pancakes or maple syrup are. You'll have to make them for me sometime," he says.

"Deal," I say with a smile. If there is one thing that I'm proud of about myself, it is my ability to cook a mean plate of pancakes. According to Alfred, they're the best things next to hamburgers.

After that, we eat in silence for a bit. The sausages and bread are actually quite good. When we finish, Gil takes our plates up. I stay in my seat and watch his back as he leaves.

I've known I'm gay for a long time, and Gilbert has been so nice to me. He's treated me with more kindness than anyone else ever has. I don't know why he's doing it, but I know without a doubt that I've fallen for him.

I mean, with his pale skin, silver hair, and captivating crimson eyes, It's no surprise I've fallen for the self-proclaimed Prussian boy. However, he's too magnificent to be with someone as plain and invisible as me. I'll just enjoy the attention for now until he forgets me like everybody else.

The thought of Gilbert forgetting me makes my chest instantly tighten and an overwhelming sadness wash over me. That sickeningly familiar feeling rises in me. As the urge grows, I quickly realize that I will not be able to ignore it this time.

I stand and hurry off towards the bathroom that Gil showed me earlier, feeling the razor I always keep with me, cold against the skin of my ankle where it is hidden away in my sock.

I need to cut. I need to cut NOW.

Gilbert's POV

I take Birdie and my plates up to the kitchen. I do this partly because Vatti and Ludwig would chew my ass out if I didn't clean up, and the other part is because I need to get away from Birdie for a moment to think.

I need to ask Birdie about what happened earlier at school. I'm also curious as to why he never takes off his hoodie. I have a feeling that I know the answer, but I just pray that I'm wrong. I have so many questions that need answers, and I have a feeling that Birdie is the only one who can give them to me.

I think over how I'm going to approach him. I need to be careful. I don't want him to feel threatened at all or to freak out and run away from me. I just want to help him, and scaring him away will be counter productive.

It's strange, feeling this way towards another. I've never been so protective or caring towards anyone else before. Well, except for Ludwig, but he's my brother, so it different from how I feel for Birdie. I really care about Birdie, and I truly want to help him. It's odd. I guess that this is what it feels like to love someone who's not your family. After I help him, maybe it could be possible for him to return my feelings. But first, I need to figure out the answers to my many questions.

I take a deep breath and head back downstairs, only to find it empty. I look around for him. Where could he have gone? Maybe the bathroom?

I hurry back upstairs to the bathroom that I showed Birdie earlier. I see the light on through the space at the bottom of the door. I knock and hear a gasp from the other side and a hiss of pain.

"Birdie…are you okay?" I call through the door, fidgeting slightly, starting to get nervous as I hear something that sounds like a repressed sob.

Birdie's crying? My face hardens instantly at the thought. What the hell is going on? Why the fick is Birdie crying? I need to get to the bottom of this and NOW.

After finding the door is locked, I back up slightly and kick the door with all my strength. I hear a crack and the door slams open, revealing a sight that I never want to see again as long as I live.

Birdie is on his knees in front of me, his violet eyes red and puffy as tears threaten to spill down his cheeks. The sleeves of his hoodie are pushed up to his elbows, revealing arms covered in scars that criss cross down their entire lengths. There are several fresh cuts from which blood is dripping steadily. The blade of a razor is clutched so tightly in Birdie's hand that his knuckles turn white as he stares back at me with wide eyes full of fear, sadness, self-loathing, shock, and heartbreaking loneliness. It's the kind of loneliness you'd expect from someone who has not felt love in a long, long time.

It takes all of one second of Birdie and me staring at each other in horror before my mind finally registers that the sight in front of me is real and not in my imagination.

"Oh mein gott!" I scream as I rush forward, dropping to my knees in front of Birdie. I yank the razor from his fingers and fling it across the room. I grab towels from under the sink, wrap them around Birdie's arms, and apply pressure to try and stop the bleeding.

I look up into pale violet eyes with a look of worry, caring, and pleading.

"Why, Birdie? Why did you do this to yourself? What made you feel unawsome enough to do this!"

I look into his eyes, trying to see some kind of explanation hidden in their lavender depths. After a few seconds, those pools of violet fill with more tears, which begin to trail down my precious Birdie's cheeks.

I can't stand seeing Birdie cry. It just breaks my awesome heart. Without thinking of the possible consequences, I wrap my arms around him and hold him close. He lets out a surprised squeak, then relaxes a bit before bursting into tears against me. He sobs openly into my chest as I hold him close to me. I stroke his hair gently and whisper to him, "Shhh, shhh. it's okay Birdie. Everything is going to be okay. Just let it all out."

I continue holding him and stroking his hair until he's done crying. When he's quieted down enough, I release him from my tight hug. I unwrap the towels from his forearms so that I can inspect the extent of the damage that Birdie has caused himself. I get a clean hand towel and soak it in warm water. I use it to gently wipe away the blood, some of which has dried by now. I dab rubbing alcohol on them, causing him to hiss in pain and try to pull his arms away from me. I stroke his hair gently and whisper words of soothing and encouragement to him. I try to be as comforting as I can. I bandage his arms and lead him back down to the basement, my mind swimming with even more questions then before.

A/N: Well what do you think? Gilbert knows now! I cut it off right before the good part though. KESESESE I am so evil! I will make sure that I hurry and upload the next chapter soon though. I will not be able to type this weekend though due to me going away to Hershey Park with my mom, her boyfriend, and my little brother. Wish me luck, I have to share a bed with my brother and I am NOT good at sharing a bed with ANYONE.

Anyway give me your feedback I love to here it and tell me what you think! I love to here it and any suggestions for more. OH and I have decided that Reviewer 60 will get a one-shot so please review!

Translations:

German:

Vatti-dad

Das- that

Danke-thank you

Fick-fuck

Mein-my

Gott-god

Here are some words from my fantastic an wonderful BetaSakura414:

(Wolf-chan started calling herself Wolf-chan? I feel like a trend-setter!) *sigh* Alright, readers. What do you say we kidnap Gil, clone him, distribute the clones amongst ourselves, and then throw him back to Mathew? Seriously, everyone needs someone like this! He's so sweet! As always, on behalf of myself and Wolfen Artist of Hetalia, thank you all for reading!

SO yeah, Until next time mein kleiner leiblings!

~Wolf-chan out.