Demi's POV

I'm staring at Jalizza as she is telling her story knowing the pain she has went through. She is recovering so fast, when I first came out of treatment, it took four months of serious therapy and I still relapsed. I wonder if her being so strong is just a face so she doesn't have to deal with her problems again. I remember the day she first went into treatment like it was yesterday.

I'm staring at the beautiful scenery for the first time in a year. Most people would say I'm crazy for coming in the area that brings back all the pain I had released in treatment. The memories aren't all that horrible but they are just emotional. I remember coming back for the documentary and just crying when I walked through the front doors. Timberline was what rescued me from the mental sicknesses I have endured for so long. It helped me get off the path of self-destruction and be able to feel again.

Most people think treatment in like a repair shop. You come in and come out all fixed. But the truth is, is that everyday is a struggle. It takes constant fixing. Recovery at first was so hard. At Timberline I had people helping and supporting me every second of everyday. I was so used to keep my emotions bottled up and in secret that I had forgotten what it was like to really deal with people. Yeah when I came out I had all the support from the world but it wasn't the same. It is still a constant struggle wondering if I want to go back to my addictions, but I just have to push through it.

It's been hard but I got through it, and still am. That's why I know Jalizza will to. That's why I am here in Chicago after all. She is in such bad shape right now. As she sleeps with her head in my lap I can't help but wonder what got her to this point. I understand that eating disorders and self harm and mental things but what's triggered it. Does she have Bipolar like me? She has the same habits as me but it could've also happened because of all the stuff she went through.

She told me that people were assholes to her but never as far as bullying. She never talked about it though, like it was something to be ashamed of. I wish she would open up about it. She also said she can't remember a lot of stuff though. She said there are a bunch of patches in her life that are just blank that she can't remember. Was it really a lot worse and she ended up dissociating it?

Maybe her family is a lot worse than it seems. Her brother treats her like she's garbage. Always calling her mean names and being rough with her. He needs help to but that is for a different time. Her parents are bad to. They expect so much and put so much pressure on her. Before I met her she was apart of four clubs, was a techie for the school play, taking voice/piano lessons, was gonna start working a part time job and her parents still EXPECTED her to get A's. I would understand if she wanted that for herself because I can tell she wants better for herself in life in general but she didn't care about her grades. It was all her parents. And then when she would lash out at them she would get grounded.

I was really worried about her the whole time I was on tour. I almost get the same feeling of the need to protect her as I get with Maddie. Maddie was basically the only thing that got me through all of the dark days in treatment. The thought of her being in pain and possibly not having one of her sisters. That killed me. I only can wish that Jalizza can find inspiration so she gets out in one piece.

The car goes over a big bump and Jalizza opens her eyes. She is still very unhappy with me for revealing all of her dark secrets but I did it for her own good. I can only hope that one day when she is recovered, she could understand. I say hesitantly, "Good Morning."

She rolls her eyes as she picks her head up and says, "What's so good about it? My life is over..."

I really don't think that she understands the severity of her problems. I then remember that I need to be completely honest with her so she can get it. I want to say it, but I know she is not gonna like it at all. I then say, "Wanna know what! You need to stop pitying yourself. You do understand you have been hospitalized three times in the last month. You think your life is over and I get that. You're right, life won't ever be the same. You're gonna have a lot of bumps in the road and a lot of days you don't think you can make it, but you'll get through it. Right now you aren't living.

I get everything you are going through, in ways I'm still going it still to this day. Wanna know what tomorrwo is? One year clean. I have been clean of purging and self harming for one year. When I tell people my story it isn't just for them to get help. It's for them to see living breathing proof that no matter what they are going through, that they will be able to get through it. You have so much talent in general, never mind for your age. You are throwing it all away by doing this to yourself. I know you don't believe it but you are beautiful and smart. The first time I saw you at your school I asked myself how could someone as amazing as you be so unhappy and depressed. But then as I got to know you more I realized why. You have very real and serious things that's going on with you mentally. Treatment isn't the end of you. Treatment is a new beginning to a left that will be worth living!"

Jalizza just sat there speechless. I can't tell if she is in shock that about the truth, or if I told her. She then whispered to herself after a long silence, "tragic realization." I look at her and she then says at a normal volume, "Greek tragedies is one of the things we were learning about at school. A tragic realization is when the main character puts all the pieces in to place and realizes everything they've done wrong and the effects they have caused. My parents didn't even come with us because of how scared of the person I have become. I can't even look in the mirror and see myself."

She starts crying and looks up and mouths, "I'm sorry" I can tell she is talking up above to her grandmother.

I look at her and say, "You have nothing to be sorry about. Everything that has been happening isn't even your fault. You are so strong. You have nothing to be ashamed of, you just need to trust me and know everything I'm doing is to help you."

She looks at me and says, "Then why can't I just stay with you now and not go to treatment."

"Because if you don't go now you never will. You'll just get sicker and sicker." I hug her as we pull into the parking lot.