Chapter Three
Where Am I?
Part One
BPOV
The pain was unbelievable. I had not expected that. It had been painful for the last month, especially when my little nudger
had begun to really make himself known. But then the cup of blood spilled and all hell broke loose inside my body. I couldn't
describe that level of pain for I had never imagined it existed. The morphine Edward jammed into me had little to no effect.
I knew something was wrong with my baby. I screamed for Edward to get him out of me immediately. There was utter chaos
in the room and in my head. Jacob was nearly frightened out of his skin. In my pain-hazed stupor, I was surprised he hadn't
phased right there in the delivery room. Rosalie and Alice had to retreat from the amount of blood pouring from my body.
Edward eventually gave up on the scalpel and used his teeth to extract my baby.
A girl! I was wrong! Renesmee. I held my arms out to take her to my breast. She was beautiful. She bit me. Ow! Was that
normal? No, couldn't be. She's not normal. She's a hybrid. Nothing should be unexpected. Nothing could really be anticipated.
I was exhausted and needed to rest. I relaxed back to the pillow and started to close my eyes. The room began to spin and the
edges of my vision began to iris in with blackness. I heard Jacob and Edward both yelling. Jacob was grasping my hand and
shouting something about a promise I had made to him. What promise? I couldn't remember just then. I would think about it
later. Right now I just needed to rest.
My vision blurred over completely and finally faded all the way out. Suddenly, I was in no pain at all. None. I no longer struggled
to breathe. I couldn't really put my finger on a description of how I felt at that moment. Only two words came to my mind, and
they played over and over, growing louder, more prominent. Comfort. Peace. I had never been as comfortable in my entire life
as I was right now. I was warm. I felt safe. I felt peaceful. I couldn't remember any worries or problems or sorrows that I had
ever experienced. I seemed able to see now, except there was nothing to look at. Not exactly nothing, everything around me
was white and light. It was bright and I was warm, comfortable, peaceful and safe. This was a most beautiful place to be. I
wondered where I was.
I wasn't in Carlisle's office/delivery room any longer. There were no bookcases lining the walls. There were no walls. Was I
dreaming? And I was alone. I wasn't too sure how I felt about that. Not pleased, I would think, but I couldn't actually place any
unhappiness. None at all. How strange.
Then I heard the voice. It was female, but I didn't recognize it at all. She sounded mature and kind. There was love in that voice,
and compassion. It made me feel happy to listen to her. Then I realized she was speaking to me.
"Isabella? Can you hear me, dear?"
"Yes, I hear you. Who are you? Where am I? Where'd everybody go?"
"Oh my, so many questions so soon!"
"I'm sorry. Is that not allowed? Asking questions?"
"Oh no, it's perfectly acceptable, dear."
"Do I know you?"
"You knew me when you were very small. You knew my whole family."
"What's your name?"
"My name was Sarah."
"Jacob's mother?"
"At one time, yes I was Jacob's mother."
"He misses you a lot."
"I know he does, dear. It's the way it must be."
"Am I a vampire?"
"Not exactly."
"What is that supposed to mean? I'm sorry. That was rude of me."
"It's alright, Isabella. You're not expected to understand and be calm all at once. It can be confusing."
"You're right about not understanding. What should I be confused about? Are you here to explain things to me?"
"Yes, I am."
"Okay then, tell me. I'm ready. Let's have it."
"There's been a mistake. Well, to be accurate, there've been a bunch of mistakes."
"By me? I know I've made tons of mistakes."
"Yes, that's true, you have made quite a few, and they are on the list and have contributed to the special circumstances in
which you now find yourself."
"What, exactly, does that mean, Sarah?"
"I'll explain as much as I can, Isabella. Yes, you have made mistakes. Everyone does. Sometimes, when a series of mistakes,
a collection of mistakes comes together, they make a really big mistake. Really big mistakes call for interventions. This is why
I'm here. I'm supposed to break this to you as gently as I can and try not to traumatize you. Please try to listen and stay calm,
can you do that for me?"
"Okay. I'm calm. I'm also impatient."
"Very well. You're dead, Isabella."
"'Scuse me?"
"You're dead. I'll move along, shall I? You died giving birth to your daughter."
"But Edward's going to turn me at the last minute. I'm going to become a vampire, like him and his family. We're going to be
together for eternity."
Sarah laughed softly, shook her head and said, "You should reconsider that for a bit, dear."
I started to argue with her but she turned and walked away. I quickly lost sight of her and could not make my feet move to
follow her. I was alone. I was still surrounded by whiteness with nothing whatsoever to see and it was incredibly quiet. I
didn't think I'd ever felt so alone. I couldn't get a grip on any passage of time but it felt like Sarah had been gone for many
hours. I don't know if I drifted off to sleep or lost consciousness or what, but suddenly a bright light began to shine in my
eyes. I raised my hand to try to block it and see what was going on. Eventually I became aware of someone approaching me.
"Sarah? Is that you?"
An unfamiliar male voice answered me. I was instantly afraid.
"Nope, ma little chickadee. I am most definitely not Sarah. She is nice though, isn't she?"
"Um, yes, she is. Who are you?"
"Oh, nobody you would recognize. You can call me Timothy. That's got a nice ring to it, doesn't it?"
"Yeah, if you say so. Hi, Timothy. What do you have to tell me?"
"Hah! Oh dearie! What makes you think I have anything to tell you?"
"Oh, um, I don't know. I figured that's why I was still here and now you're here. Is that wrong?"
"Nope, that's not wrong. I was just messin' with ya. HA HA HA HA HA! I'm so funny! I crack myself up sometimes."
I was getting a little pissed off with 'Timothy', he didn't strike me as being that funny and apparently my annoyance was
showing on my face. He shook his finger at me admonishing me to behave.
"Listen here, baby doll, you need to step down off that tall horse. You do understand why you're here don't you?"
"Well, I thought I did. Suppose you tell me again. Refresh my memory."
"Ooohh! Feisty aren't we? Okay, whatever, we don't really have time to bond anyway. You're dead and you're not supposed
to be. Got it? Good. Now, what do you suppose should happen to you, or what's left of you, now?"
"Well, all I know is what I thought was going to happen. My husband, Edward, is going to change me. Well, that was the
plan anyway."
I trailed off at the end because it was becoming evident that things were not exactly progressing according to my plan. After
staring at me without speaking any more for several minutes, Timothy shook his head, rather sadly I thought, and turned
and began walking away from me.
"Wait! Where are you going?"
"I'm kicking your case up a level Bubela. I'll be sending someone I can be certain you'll listen to. Don't worry, she won't be long."
"Is Sarah coming back?"
"Oh no, not Sarah. She's busy sending down some fresh waves of comfort to the spot you just vacated. You really left a mess
down there, didn't you Iszzzzzy?"
"I didn't mean to!"
"Yeah, that's always the story, isn't it? They never mean to."
His voice drifted away and I barely heard that last bit. This was exasperating! Was this the way things were going to be for the
three days it would take for me to complete the change and become a vampire? This was nothing like the way Edward and
Carlisle described what the turning would be like.
An indeterminate amount of time passed by without me being aware at all. Finally, I saw a figure walking toward me in the
distance. It got closer quite quickly and I saw that it was a woman. Good! The women around here were at least easier to
talk to. Timothy was a real piece of work. As the woman drew near me, my mouth flew open as I realized who it was.