Chapter Twelve: By A Thread

The sound of Tony's feet connecting with the pavement echoed off the houses lining the street. Dash's tags rattled on his collar as he ran alongside the agent in the early morning hours. The air was cool against Tony's bare legs but he hardly noticed it. After Gibbs had fallen asleep on the couch with Mason and Sadie, Tony had taken Dash and slipped out for a run in hopes of clearing his head. He was just as devastated as Gibbs was about losing LJ but he knew he needed to keep it together for Gibbs and the children. He had to be the strong one. He was hoping a short run in the brisk March air would help him pull himself together.

Tony ran Dash to the park so he could take care of business. They slowed their pace to a walk and Tony stared at the sandbox, imagining little LJ digging a hole, chattering away with his new friend and then being snatched and taken away from everything he knew and loved. He'd read the police report. He knew exactly what had happened. He saw it every time he closed his eyes, every time he had a moment alone to think, every time the news broke in with a report on the kidnapping…

Dash whined and nosed Tony's hand, bringing him out of his trance. Tony cleaned up the dog's mess and tossed it into the pet waste disposal can then took off at a run before his emotions could catch up to him. In many ways he was only hanging on by a thread and knew if he dwelled on it for too long that he'd fall apart. The two took the long way home, watching lights come on in windows, cars leave and bus stops fill up as the neighborhood around them woke.

"Better get back before our crew starts waking up, Dash," he said. "We'll have to go to the airport later to pick grandpa up and I'm sure Gibbs'll wanna talk to Fornell. The little ones need baths and lots of love. You can help with that—the love part. I won't make you take a bath. It's gonna be another busy day, boy. And hard. And long. Another long, hard, busy day."

Dash barked in response. The living room light came on as they jogged up the driveway. They'd arrived back just in time. Tony rubbed his hand over the dog's soft fur as he released the leash.

"Let's do this, Dash."

After a long, trying morning, Jack finally boarded the plane that would take him to DC. He'd paid nearly double what he usually did and ended up with a first class seat after learning there was no more room in coach but no amount of money was going to keep him from his family.

His desperation to get to his son and grandkids was manifesting itself in impatience. He could've cared less about the hot towels, alcohol and three course meal the flight attendants offered him during the short flight and made sure to tell them how unnecessary all the fuss was just so they could charge an exorbitant amount of money. He cut off attempts by the well meaning man sitting next to him to make conversation too. For the first time in a long time he had no interest in talking. The only thing on his mind was the tragedy unfolding in Alexandria. By the time the pilot announced their descent into Dulles, he'd been labeled the grumpy old man by the passengers and flight attendants.

Gibbs and Tony were waiting right outside the security checkpoint with the kids. Tony was smiling, though it wasn't his most genuine smile, and Gibbs just looked miserable.

"Gampa!" Mason squealed, trying to free himself from Tony's grasp so he could get to Jack.

"Hi, bud," Jack greeted with a smile and a kiss as he whisked his baby into his arms. "How are you?"

"I o-tay," Mason answered. "LJ go bye-bye."

"I heard," Jack said. "We're gonna try to get him home real soon. Sadie, how you doing, sweet pea?" He kissed his granddaughter and brushed his fingers over her cheek.

"Seepy," she answered, cuddling into her daddy's chest.

"Sleepy? Did you have a hard time sleeping last night?"

"Uh-huh."

"Maybe we can all take a nap later," Jack replied with a wink. "How ya holding up, Leroy?"

Gibbs just looked at his dad and shook his head. Not well.

"Tony?"

"Hangin' in there," Tony answered. "How are you? How was your flight?"

"Frustrating," Jack answered, pointing them in the direction of baggage claim. He wasn't sure how long he'd end up staying so he'd packed his suitcase instead of his carryon. "Did you know they serve three course meals in first class for breakfast? Ridiculous! And all so they can swindle hardworking people out of their money."

"Does seem like overkill for a short flight," Tony said, "but as much money as those tickets cost, I'd be scarfing down anything they offered me."

"Wasn't much in the mood for eating," Jack replied.

"Yeah," Tony said. "Nobody here ate much this morning either."

"We'll have to fix that," Jack said. His nurturing side would not let his loved ones go without food because they were upset. They needed to be strong for the kids and strong for each other and sleepless nights and empty tummies wasn't the way to accomplish that.

Oklahoma Highway Patrol Officer Luke Metzger pulled up behind an abandoned car on a long stretch of road between towns. He peeked in the windows and saw two car seats in the back but no other personal belongings. The car had either broken down, run out of gas or someone had left it on the side of the road so the state would pick up the fee to tow it to the junkyard. Metzger had seen all three in his time on the force.

It was already ticketed and had been sitting long enough that it needed to be taken care of. Metzger slapped a bright orange sicker on the back window for the tow truck driver then returned to his cruiser. After looking at his map, he decided to call the tow service fifty miles north, not knowing Lisa was sixty miles west, and made the call as he continued on his way.

It had been a week since Blake brought Lisa and LJ to his farm. Lisa was a little odd, in Blake's opinion, but he couldn't quite put his finger on a reason. He chalked it up to the domestic abuse and left it at that. Besides, he knew he was odd too. Who didn't have a TV or computer in this day and age? Neither seemed to be bothered by each other's oddities though. Lisa had a warm, safe place to hide out and Blake came home to a clean house and hot meal each evening.

The cowboy had grown quite fond of having LJ around. He'd taken it on himself to be a friend to the little boy. The kid wasn't getting along well with his mother. The only two words he ever seemed to say to her were 'no' and 'daddy'. Despite all the tears and cries for his daddy, Blake enjoyed LJ's company. When he returned from his weekly haul into town to get supplies, he found the little boy wandering around the house, fingers in his mouth, crying for his daddy. Blake smiled sadly at the child and scooped him up into his arms.

"It's alright, big guy," he said. "Is your mommy still sleeping?" He walked far enough down the hall to see that the door to her room was still closed. "Looks like she is. Do you wanna help me feed the animals this morning?"

"Daddy," LJ shuddered through teary sobs.

Blake rubbed LJ's back as he made his way into the room he was using and grabbed the diapers and wipes. He told LJ all about his trip into town that morning while he changed his diaper then picked the boy up again and headed for the kitchen to grab a banana. He'd make a bigger breakfast after the animals had been fed but he needed a little something in his stomach to tide him over. He sat down in one of the rocking chairs on the porch with LJ in his lap. The sun was just starting to peek above the horizon. It was the most peaceful time of day.

LJ's crying slowed as they watched the horses and cows graze in a nearby field. Blake had quickly learned that his young guest loved to watch the animals. With LJ calmed down, Blake worked on getting some food in his belly, knowing hunger wouldn't help anything. They shared a banana then headed out to the barn together to get the bucket of chicken feed.

"Okay, LJ," Blake said as they approached the pen, "the trick to feeding the chickens is you've gotta throw a handful of food in there before you open the gate so they won't peck you when you go in their pen."

"Wer at?"

"Anywhere in there," Blake answered. "They'll find it. Grab a handful and toss it in."

LJ got two fistfuls of chicken feed and threw it through the fence. He shrieked in excitement when the chickens flocked to the scattered seed. Blake opened the gate and let LJ help him spread more feed then they headed into the coop while the chickens ate.

"Let's get some eggs," Blake said. "We gotta watch out for snakes in here. They like to come steal the chickens' eggs."

"Dat's n'nice," LJ said, watching with great interest as Blake pulled a couple eggs out of the first nest and put them in the bucket they'd used to carry the feed in.

"You're right, not nice at all," Blake agreed. "Your turn, kiddo. Be very gentle."

Blake tapped the board next to each nest to scare away any snakes while LJ collected the eggs with great caution. When they were done caring for the chickens, Blake fed the goat but made LJ stand back so he wouldn't get hurt. He didn't exactly have the nicest goat. They fed the dogs and Blake explained that they didn't have to feed the cats very often because they caught the mice in the barns. With the horses and cows grazing in the fields, their early morning chores were done.

"I think it's time to feed this little belly now," Blake said, tickling LJ.

LJ giggled and squirmed and tried to tickle the cowboy back but didn't have much luck before Blake got him again. By the time they arrived back at the house, LJ was much happier than he'd been when he woke up.

"Looks like your momma's still asleep," Blake said. "Let's wash our hands and get started on breakfast. I don't know about you but I'm so hungry I could eat a horse!"

"Eww," LJ said. He didn't think he'd like to eat a horse. That sounded yucky.

"How about some bacon and sausage, hash browns, eggs and toast instead?"

"Nummy."

LJ shadowed Blake all over the kitchen. He helped him move chopped potatoes, sausage links and bacon into the skillets, put bread in the toaster and crack eggs into cups. Blake enjoyed the little one's company and found it easy to be patient with him. It was nice to have the boy running around his farm and the cowboy felt good about rescuing him and his mother.

By the time Lisa got out of bed and made her way into the kitchen, breakfast was nearly ready.

"Mornin'," Blake said. "Coffee's hot."

"Thank you," Lisa said, "and good morning. Sorry about sleeping in. I guess I didn't realize how tired I was."

"It's not a problem," Blake replied with an easy smile.

"Good morning, LJ," Lisa said. "Can Mommy have a kiss?"

"No," LJ answered. He was still not happy with his mommy for taking him away from Daddy.

"A hug?"

"No."

"That makes me sad," Lisa said. "Can I give you a hug and a kiss?"

"I sayed no!" LJ demanded.

"Are you ever going to say anything besides 'no' to me?" Lisa asked.

LJ didn't understand the question so instead of answering he scrunched his face up at his mother to show his disapproval.

"We've had a busy morning," Blake said, trying to break the tension. "We fed chickens and collected eggs and fed the goat and the dogs and we watched the cows and the horses."

"Sounds like fun," Lisa said. "I'm sorry I missed it." She ruffled LJ's hair on her way to the coffee pot.

"I was wondering if you wanted to brush the horses this morning while I clean out their stalls," Blake said. "Have you ever done that before?"

"Yeah, and I'd love to," Lisa answered. "I was thinking I could brush the dogs too."

"I'm sure they'd like that," Blake said.

"This is a cowboy sized breakfast," Lisa said when Blake put a plate of food in front of her. "Are you going to be able to eat all yours, LJ?"

LJ crossed his arms and scowled at his mommy and Lisa decided she'd had enough of her son's attitude. How could the month he'd spent with his dad have erased the twenty two months she'd spent with him? "Excuse me. I need to have a word with my son."

Blake nodded as Lisa grabbed LJ's hand and led him down the hall. When he started resisting, she dragged him into her bedroom.

"What is your problem?" she growled quietly.

"No!"

"You have everything you could ever want here. You get to do all kinds of things you never got to do in DC. You're the center of attention. Why can't you just be grateful?"

"Daddy," LJ ground out, giving his mother his best glare.

"I wish I never woulda brought you here," Lisa snarled. "Sadie and Mason would've been thrilled to come on this adventure and I'm sure they would've behaved better than you are."

"No."

"If you're not careful, I'm gonna start smacking your butt, mister," Lisa warned.

LJ's glare turned even more evil towards his mother but as tempted as Lisa was to swat his butt, she didn't want to take him back out to the breakfast table crying. She opened the door, motioned for him to leave and followed him out.

LJ made a beeline for Blake. He tugged on the sleeve of the cowboy's plaid flannel shirt as crocodile tears gathered in the corners of his eyes. "Daddy," he said when Blake looked down at him. "Me wan Daddy!"

Blake scooped the child up and brushed his tears away with his thumb.

"Didn't take long for him to wrap you around his little finger," Lisa commented as she sat down at the table with them.

"It's a rough transition," Blake said while LJ sobbed into his shirt. He was a little annoyed with Lisa. He knew Lisa was frustrated but he and LJ had had such a good morning together and after five minutes in a room with his mom, the little boy was a sobbing mess again. Blake would be the first to admit he didn't know much about raising kids but he understood the concept of picking your battles and he didn't think this was one Lisa needed to pick with her son when he was obviously in such a fragile state.

He pulled LJ's plate over next to his and tried to pry the boy off of him enough he could turn him around in his lap but LJ wasn't having any of it. "I know you're hungry, big guy. Don't you wanna eat some of this breakfast you helped me make?"

LJ clung tighter to Blake and buried his face deeper into the man's strong chest. "Daddy!"

Two weeks passed with no news. Two weeks of barely holding on. Two weeks of pretending to sleep and forcing himself to eat. Two weeks of Tony and his father taking care of the children while he beat himself up over the one he'd lost. Two very, very long weeks. And just about the time Gibbs wasn't sure if he could hold on any longer, another obstacle was placed in his path. The kids' birthdays were only days away.

"What's on your mind?" Jack asked as he put a cup of coffee in front of his son. Tony was upstairs in the bathtub with Mason and Sadie. The kids loved it when he put on his swim suit and played in the water with them. In fact, they loved it so much they'd started begging Daddy for a swimming pool.

"Their birthday's next week," Gibbs answered.

"I know," Jack said.

"I was sure we'd have LJ back by now. Where's she hiding him? What is she doing with my son?"

"We can't give up hope, Leroy," Jack said.

"What if he's cold and hungry? What if he's scared? Lonely. Sick. Hurt."

"Leroy," Jack said.

"I'm not even being a good father to the two I have left." He'd been struggling to balance his heartache and desperation to find LJ with caring for Mason and Sadie. How could he be expected to go on like nothing was wrong? But how could he expect Mason and Sadie to stop living their lives? What the hell was he supposed to do?

"You're doing the best you can and you're doing just fine," Jack said. "You feed 'em, you hug 'em, you kiss 'em, you play with them, you read to them—"

"But all I can think about is the one that's missing."

"That's understandable."

"Should we celebrate their birthdays?" Gibbs asked. "Should I put it off until LJ comes back? I doubt they'd know the difference but what if he never comes back? What do I do, Dad? I'm so tempted to take Tony and go out looking myself."

"Tobias is one of your best friends," Jack said. "Do you not think he's doing everything he can to get your child back?"

"We shoulda found him by now!" Gibbs insisted, his anger growing.

"The best of the best are working on it," Jack said. "You're needed here. Mason and Sadie need to know they're still important too. They need to know their daddy still loves them. That is your job right now. I think you should celebrate their birthdays, even if it's just cake and ice cream and a couple presents. Then, when LJ comes back, and he will come back, we'll have another party."

"We're being invaded by little munchkins!" Tony yelled dramatically as he chased the little ones into the living room. "Run for your life!"

Mason dove onto the couch between his daddy and his grandpa and Sadie grabbed onto Gibbs' leg and squealed when Tony caught up with her.

"Do we have some squeaky clean children now?" Jack asked, tugging Mason into his lap.

"Very squeaky," Tony said before rubbing his fist over Mason's bare tummy and making squeaking noises.

"Me too! Me too!" Sadie said, pulling her shirt up.

Tony did the same to her and made more noises. "Yep, you squeak too and I brought her comb down, Daddy. She still only wants you to brush her hair."

Gibbs took the comb from Tony then situated his daughter in his lap and started brushing her loose curls. Thanks to quite a bit of practice with Kelly he'd learned how to minimize pulling while getting the tangles out. Sadie wouldn't let anyone else touch her hair with a comb.

"I think we should go to the mall today," Jack said.

"I don't know, Dad," Gibbs said.

"Come on," Jack said. "It'll be fun. Besides, we could all use a day outside this house." He knew it would give his son a chance to do some birthday shopping and the kids could play and have fun. There were toy stores and pet stores, cookie shops to stop and get a tasty treat and they could hit the food court for lunch.

"Does sound like fun," Tony said.

As much as he might've wanted to, Gibbs knew he couldn't say no. He also knew his dad and Tony were right. Sitting around waiting for the phone to ring wasn't doing any of them any good. He put the comb down on the end table and turned his daughter around. "Do you wanna go to the mall?"

"Yeah," Sadie answered.

"Mason, do you wanna go to the mall, buddy?"

"Uh-huh!"

"Alright," Gibbs said, "we'll go to the mall."

"Daddy?" Sadie said.

"What, baby?"

"I wub you."

Gibbs smiled and drew his daughter's head to his chest. "I love you too, Sadie," he said before kissing her. "And you, Mason, I love you too. Come here."

Mason hurried across the couch into his father's outstretched arm. Daddy had been sad a lot lately but that didn't mean he'd stopped loving them. They were still safe and loved and cared for and that was the only thing that mattered.

Gibbs held his children tightly to him, dropping kisses on their heads and combing his finger through their hair. The mall could wait a couple more minutes.

Jack and Tony looked at each other and smiled.