3. Miracle in the Sky

It is an endlessly strange feeling to have been.

I have been a refugee, though, in this part of the world, at this time, that's not uncommon.

I have been a teacher to a group of sweet, though somewhat simple, aliens.

I have been blind.

I have been a mother.

That's the one that sticks.

When I first got hurt, I understood that I couldn't be a mother anymore. I couldn't remember Tobias. Couldn't take care of him. Couldn't keep him. I'm sure every woman who has given up a child imagines reuniting with them. I'm equally sure none of them imagined the reunion that Tobias and I had.

I had liked Tobias.

It sounds ridiculous. I was his mother. A long time ago. But we hadn't been a family. Not really. I'd known that. I could see Eva's family: her husband, her son, happy and together. Also reunited. They were family.

Tobias and I were friendly, which was to be expected from two people who were just meeting each other. Back then, in the camp, when everyone's world had changed just as much as mine had, I couldn't shake the feeling that I made him sad.

I had tried to just not interfere. I let him be with that beautiful blond girl that he had obviously loved. I let him win his war. I had no power to stop him.

Cassie's mother Michelle, an unfailingly kind woman who still sends me a Christmas card, and stops to chat on the very rare occasions that we ran into each other in town, had asked me, during that battle we all knew would one way or another, be the last, if I would take Tobias home with me.

I'd said yes, without taking so much as a moment to think. And I'd known that I meant it.

It hadn't worked out that way, and I was saddened by that, but it was the ache of regret, not the acute pain of loss.

I had liked him.

What else do you say about a son that you can't remember who shows up as a red-tail hawk, save you from monsters, heals you and gives you magic powers before bringing you to a meadow full of creatures? It was like an old myth. It wasn't something that really happened.

Tobias, the boy I'd never really had, was gone now. But his gifts lingered.

I could see. I'd gotten a good paying job and moved to a safer place. But it wasn't until I saw Marco on TV, suddenly handsome and grown up, turning into animal after animal for the cheers of the crowd on some silly late night show, that I realized I was only using one of the gifts Tobias had given me.

It was miraculous that I could see, sure, but I could also still morph.

After a lot of dithering, I finally called Cassie's mother. She was a vet for the local zoo. I asked her for a favor. I don't think I could have convinced her if Cassie hadn't happened to have been home and made my case for me.

I went to the Gardens with the two of them and with Cassie's mother's keys and Cassie's experience and advice I had acquired what felt like half the zoo. Creature after creature. I looked at the tigers for a long time, but the sadness in Cassie's eyes at the enclosure stopped me. I couldn't ask for this.

But now?

I have been a panther.

I have been a dolphin.

I have been a squirrel.

I have been an antelope.

I've run straight up trees and prowled through the forest. I've gone leaping in and out of the ocean waves.

And I have flown. So many times, I've flown over the world.

I always fly as a red-tailed hawk and every time I see another one I think about that miraculous boy who came in and out of my life so quickly. And whenever I see another, I call out Thank you!

They've never answered back. Maybe they never will.

But just in case it's ever him, I want him to hear it.

Thank you.

Next Chapter: The Wife in Her Home