As Starscream's moment of truth is approaching, he is being forced to face the human in front of a mirror. Now that the initial shock is over, now that the sight of flesh is starting to become normal, the real impact of his drastic transformation is taking shape in his mind. As much as we are trying to keep him in character during this story, we are also trying to imagine believable reactions to situations he's facing for the first time. A lot has been written about Starscream, but the best way to interpret his complex personality is to go the original sources. Although we are writing G1 Starscream, we are also taking bits from all his versions, cartoon, movies and comics included. We are aware that there are people that disagree with us, and we welcome diversity of opinions. However, we highly believe human nature is more powerful than stereotypes. We hope you enjoy the following chapters, every one very important to the development of future events.
Thank you very much for reading and reviewing. Sometimes we don't have the time to reply all of your comments, but everyone is very important to us :o)
Chapter 21
Pain and Pleasure
Blood stained the pavement where Starscream had fallen, a vibrant pool of red to match the one a few metres behind him. A string of irregular rubies dotted their way between and beyond them, working their way to the dark corner in which a young human male sat huddled and shivering.
The silhouettes in the windows had disappeared like spectres of his imagination; macabre curiosity a far cry from anything that could be considered concern. But what was to be expected when brown stains on the street spoke of past bloodshed; it was always possible to grow cold and accustomed to the suffering of others when it was waved like a flag of conquest before the eyes of the condemned.
But Starscream understood that; he understood the concept better than any of those pathetic flesh creatures that moved with habit to and from the windows, their apartments looming above him like silent sentries. After all, he had seen it all before. Kaon had taught him well, granting him the dual roles of victim and aggressor, providing him with an insight many would never be blessed with.
Blessed or damned...it was the same thing in the end.
Finding the strength to move again, he lifted his left arm and peeled back his jacket; sticky with blood it came away like latex, revealing a stained shirt clinging tightly to a gaping wound. Starscream hissed with pain as he pulled the fabric away, tearing the garment so that he might gain better access to his damaged flesh, to his badge of shame and weakness...
"Stupid slagging fool..." he cursed himself as he leaned his head back against the brick wall, allowing the white fog of unconscious to dissipate once again. He had already succumbed once, lying in the street like a worthless piece of scrap for Primus knew how long; there was no way he would give in a second time.
As colour returned to his field of vision, Starscream brought his attention back to his shoulder. With tentative fingers he traced the outline of the wound, feeling its slippery, raised edges, the warmth of his flesh and the vital fluid still trickling forth in partially clotted rivulets. Pain surged through him, acid spears on a spider's web, and he repressed his need to cry out; there was no one to hear him anyway.
He didn't know what to do; it wasn't the first time he had been wounded, it wasn't the first time he had been left alone to suffer... But his new body presented him with new questions and uncertainties – was the thickening of his blood a good thing? Was he going to die?
Starscream knew humans were fragile creatures, but he had never really paid any attention to the levels of damage they could sustain before being faced with termination; a dead human was a good human and thus he had always gone for the maximum.
For the first time in his life he cursed his malicious nature...if only he had been more observant.
He felt like a fool.
A fool for his ignorance, a fool for his arrogance, a fool for his stupidity...
There was no doubt in Starscream's mind that his transformation had changed his mental capacity too, it was the only explanation for his moment of hesitation and thus his current situation. He shook his head, groaning in pain as he did so.
What was he supposed to do now, cold, alone and quite possibly bleeding to death? He pressed his palm against his wound, unsure of what he was doing, and immediately regretted the action. But despite the agony, he kept it in place; if nothing else the extended pain would remind him to stay online, would remind him to keep functioning, to keep fighting...
To find help...
He thought of Johnny; the pathetic earth germ that was to blame for all of this. Perhaps the simpering creature was still lingering in the shadows, awaiting another scrap of attention like a starving empty crawling through the streets of Kaon. Starscream opened his mouth to call him; yes, he had condemned him, but he knew that if Johnny heard his cry for help the shivering human would be there in an instant. There for his scraps, there for the blood-stained dollar bills that would come in exchange for his help...
The Decepticon shook his head with a grimace. No...what was he thinking? Seeking assistance from such a miserable excuse for life...? It was one thing to have him seek out accommodations for him, but to heal him...to touch him...?
No way.
He closed his eyes, deep in thought.
Hospital...
That was the place that Stella had mentioned the night they had met; the place that she couldn't afford to take him. The human equivalent of a Repair Bay... Starscream opened his eyes again. Yes, that was where he needed to go...
Although...
He didn't know where it was. He grimaced, another groan escaping his lips.
And another problem...
He wasn't fully human. What if they detected his true form? The idea was worse than a death sentence; being discovered would mean the end of his mission, would mean the end of any chance he had of regaining Cybertronian his body...
No. It wasn't an option...
Gritting his teeth, Starscream focussed all his energy on his legs. Using the wall as a brace, he forced himself onto his feet and suddenly felt as if the world were spinning around him. The cold night air embraced him painfully, sending tingles through his numbed limbs.
With shivering fingers he pulled his jacket back over his shoulder and zipped it up as a barrier to the night. Easing himself away from the wall Starscream took a defiant step forward...and another...and another...
A smirk formed on his lips. He didn't need anybody's help.
Another step.
He was Starscream; wounded, but a Cybertronian god nonetheless...
And another...
A god that had never needed anybody's help before...that never would.
White fog began to drift into the street, melding with the dark shadows, filling Starscream's field of vision with a stark landscape of contrasts. The buildings around him began to sway, or perhaps it was his own body, and the sky began to enclose around him like a suffocating hand.
He cried out in defeat as his knees hit the pavement, sending another wave of pain through his shivering body.
He had been wrong.
He needed help...
Shaking his head, Starscream tried to gain his bearings again. He knew there was no way he'd be able to balance on his motorbike in his current condition, thus he had to find assistance close by. He looked towards the apartment Johnny had pointed out; perhaps Johnny's friend would be able to heal him.
Starscream turned his head and gazed blearily in the opposite direction. And then he suddenly realised where he was.
The dishevelled apartment block just a few streets away...
The human that had already healed him once...
Painfully, Starscream forced himself onto his feet again.
Slagging fool...
……….
Stella hadn't turned off the lights too long ago when she heard the irregular footsteps in the hallway.
Some drunk guy, probably Mister Stephenson returning home after having too much scotch once again. He had never been able to hold his drinks after all.
But the footsteps stopped right outside her apartment, followed by a fist that started to punch her door.
Stella got up from the bed and wrapped herself in her red night robe. She wasn't scared of who could it be; she had lived alone for too long to be afraid of strangers. But if the one knocking on her door was the one man she feared, she knew better than to keep him waiting outside.
Everybody had an owner, and a dog, she said to herself as she reached the door. As every whore had a pimp…
But she didn't find the face she feared when she opened the door. She didn't had time to enjoy her happiness, though, as her smile quickly disappeared.
"Sean! Oh my God, you're bleeding! What happened?!"
Sean entered, pushing her away and starting to unzip his jacket.
"It was my fault! My slagging, Pit-spawned fault! I should've never lowered my guard that way!"
"Were you… stabbed? Sean, this is serious! I have to take you to a hospital!"
"No hospitals!" he roared. "This injury doesn't seem very serious, but I need immediate attention. Repair me!"
Stella was too shocked to realize that, once again, he was speaking weird. She helped him to get rid of his bloody jacket and shirt and guided him to the big couch in her living room.
"Here," she said, making a ball with his shirt and giving it to him. "Put this against the wound and press hard. I'll get something to clean you up."
Sean did what she said and sat down, resting his back against the couch. He heard her moving some things in the wash room and in less than a minute she was back carrying a thin, metallic, white box and a small bowl of water.
"Fortunately for you I've seen this kind of wound before," she said, sitting beside him and uncovering his shoulder. "More times than I can count, actually…just comes with the job I guess... Now, this is important sugar. Did you get that with a dirty weapon, maybe rusty? I can help stop the bleeding but I can't prevent an infection."
He shook his head, allowing her to touch him. "It was a sharp weapon… a knife, but it wasn't rusty."
Stella began to wash his wound. "Who did this to you? Kane's men?"
"Do you know that Kane creature?"
She smiled slightly. "Honey, everybody knows Kane in this neighborhood… And some better than others. I kinda work for him, actually."
"I should've guessed."
"Kane controls everything here, Sean. I can't work the streets without his permission, and without him getting his weekly cut of course… You made a mistake defying him."
He frowned. "How do you know about that?"
"Everybody knows about the mysterious sexy guy who beat Maximus and Kane's closest lieutenants. You've suddenly become very famous around here, sugar."
"Just for beating the slag out of some greasy man? You certainly make a circus out of nothing."
She smiled again. "Maximus is not just some greasy man. He earned his nickname for a reason… But it doesn't surprise me that you defeated him. You're quite strong, Sean. I could see that the first night you came here."
Already out of the shock, Stella felt the unmistakable tingle of desire running through her veins once again. The proximity of his body gave her instant fever, her hands touching his skin wanted to do so much more than just cure him…
"See what I mean? You're not bleeding anymore, how strange. I was sure you'd need some stitches but I don't know anymore… Anyway, I'll clean you with alcohol now. Hold still, this will hurt."
He cringed slightly when she applied the cotton dampened with alcohol, but didn't complain. Stella didn't know why, but she had that strange feeling again, the feeling that he was experiencing all that for the first time.
"Okay, we're done…" she said, covering the wound with a bandage. "Be careful when you shower, try not to moisten it. My guess is that you'll be as good as new in about a week, maybe less, considering how fast you heal, although you will have a scar."
She got up when she finished, gathering everything she had used and putting it in the bowl, now filled with reddish water.
"Now just let me wash this and I'll fix you something. Are you hungry?"
She yelped in surprise and delight when he grasped her by the waist, the bowl falling to the carpet.
……………..
Once he realized he was in no danger because of the injury on his shoulder, Starscream stopped listening to what Stella was saying.
His attention was easily caught by her hands, healing him with so much care. Once he had swallowed his pride and accepted his situation, coming to her that night had been an easy decision. She had helped him before; there was no reason to think she wouldn't do it again.
And he hadn't been mistaken. She hadn't hesitated, just momentarily taken aback by the sight of him with his clothes soaked in blood – fortunately, not all of it actually belonged to him – but immediately had assisted him, washing and disinfecting the injury.
As she adjusted a bandage over his wound, Starscream straightened himself on the couch and fixated his eyes on the opening of the upper part of the piece of textile wrapping her body. He could see her breasts through that opening, at least a part of them. Perhaps there was no spark beneath them, but Starscream already knew that was his favourite part on a human female's body. How could it be that he had never noticed before how fascinating human breasts were?
When she got up, Starscream put his hands on her waist. She was saying something but he didn't listen, immediately focusing on the ribbon tying her night robe and undoing it.
The textile opened, exposing more of that skin he wanted to see. Beneath her night robe, she was not wearing anything but a small garment covering her intimate organs.
Her smell arrived at his nose, immediately seducing him. He knew it was disgusting, primitive at the best, but he was already starting to understand that some things concerning humanity were not made for reasoning. His body simply reacted, instinct taking the place of logic. The strange thing was that he was beginning to be comfortable with that chaotic way in which humans functioned.
He approached his face to Stella's stomach, touching it with his nose. Her scent was becoming more intense every moment, an open invitation. He wondered if the Autobots' female pet smelled like that. The thought caused him an immediate arousal.
He felt Stella's hands touching him, starting to caress his hair.
His hands moved too and pulled her underwear down. He wanted her so much at that moment. It was intoxicating.
Stella removed her night robe and lowered her body, her skin rubbing the fabric of his jeans. Starscream lifted his head and found the mouth of the naked woman sitting on his lap. He kissed her with increasing passion, feeling her flavour invading his mouth.
Her hands went down, helping him to get rid of the obstacle his pants had became. He didn't even feel when his jeans were unzipped, all he felt was the sudden freedom between his legs, his organic virility exposed only to find immediate shelter.
Without ceasing his kisses, Starscream grasped her by the waist once again and began to move inside her, feeling his desire increase even more with the sound of her first moans inside his own mouth. She embraced his neck as her body was charged powerfully by Starscream's insatiable masculinity. One of her hands went down, scratching his chest and finding his wounded shoulder.
Starscream was assaulted by pain, but his arousal only increased. Pain, pleasure… they were not that different, not when the one inflicting it was also the one who could heal it.
Starscream got up, his hands beneath her buttocks and his arousal never abandoning her delicious femineity. She embraced his torso with her legs as he put her against the blue fabric of the coach, pinning her down as both lovers existed only for passion for the next few hours.
To be continued.