Chapter 12

When I woke up the next day, it was dawn. I saw Fishcreek sharing tongues with Shinewhisker. I smiled. Awww that's so great, I thought, my grouch of a mentor might get a mate if he dosen't mess things up. Maybe that was part of the reason he had been so cheerful lately. I decided not to interrupt them. I headed for the lake, to do some early morning hunting.

I sat down on the riverbed hoping a fish would appear soon. My mind started wondering idly. I found myself questioning if fish sleep. Do they have family they care about? Are they terrified of cats coming to hunt them? Do they like swimming?

What was I thinking?! I needed to find some prey to take back to camp! I focused hard now, watching the river intensely. A fish appeared! I scooped it out and gave it a killing bite. "Thank you Starclan!" I whispered looking at the sky, imagining Mosskit was watching me proudly. I scanned the river, but it seemed all the fish were hiding today. I grasped the fish in my jaws and padded deeper into the forest. I buried the prey next to a large boulder and tasted the air for any scents.

Squirrel! I looked around trying to pinpoint the creature. Where was it? I pricked my ears and sniffed the air. There! It had been hiding behind me. I whirled around and sprang at it. The creature was dazed and easily killed. I buried it by the fish, and checked scents again. I smelt my clanmates, prey and fox. My heart thumped in fear. I dug up my prey and ran to camp.

The camp was so different from this morning. I dropped the prey on the fresh-kill pile and walked up to Fishcreek, who had just finished setting the patrols. "I see you have been hunting. Great job Silverpaw." I nodded in acknowledgement, surprised he was so complimentary. Shinewhisker must be making him happy. Or maybe she was rubbing off on him.

"Thank you. While I was out I smelled fox." He called Willowshadow, Sandclaw Spashspot and Wetfoot and told them about the fox. "So we have to go track it down and make sure it doesn't have cubs. Then we chase them out of the territory."

I noticed he kept saying we. "What do you mean we?" I asked him.

He meowed, "I am going with them." He spotted Oakstorm the same time I did. He had just emerged, climbing out of the warriors den after sleeping late. "Oakstorm," he called, "Will you show Silverpaw some battle moves please?"

So that's how I got to spend an afternoon training with my ex best friend. I sighed as I followed him into the forest. He set the pace and I struggled to keep up. He got to the training hollow way ahead of me. He didn't comment, starting the lesson instead. I found myself thinking about the day when we were friends, and all the games we played together was kits. It was enough to kill me.

I didn't know someone important to me was dying too. If I did, I would have been doing everything I could to save him. Meanwhile Oakstorm snapped at me, saying that I had better learn to listen to warriors if I was ever going to get respect from my clanmates. I sighed again, and threw myself at him and wrestled him to the ground, clawing him with sheathed paws. He seemed to have forgotten his defensive moves. I switched from clawing his face, keeping my paws sheathed, to battling his stomach. I would show him he had to respect me! My expression twisted into anger.

I wished I had him back. My anger melted into pain. I hated being mad at him, hated feeling that I was second best. The sudden pain made me flinch. I lost my focus and fell off him. I stayed on the ground, too heartbroken to get up. I stared out into the distance still thinking about our lost friendship. I felt a single teardrop fall down my face. Oakstorm nudged me to my paws. My heart soared at his touch. "Come on," he growled, "if you are just going waste time, you can do that at camp." My heart dropped to my paws again. I followed him, my heart getting heavier with each step.

The patrol was back already. I saw Oakstrom run up to Sandclaw, saying something like how worried he had been. I rolled my eyes. But then I noticed a bleakness in her eyes. Graymist! I rushed into the nursery. She was curled up, napping with her three kits. I returned and Willowshadow walked up to me. The expression on her face… reminded me of how she looked when Mosskit died. No! No it can't be! Fernpaw! Shadpaw! I dashed to the medicine cats' den. I swallowed a wail of despair. On the ground of the den laid a still figure. I knew that figure. Oh StarClan…

The cat's fur was scented with lavender and rosemary, just as Mosskit had. The blue eyes I knew and trusted were closed and would stay that way. The gray fur I always saw as sleek and well taken care of was matted and covered in scratches. Watersong emerged from the rock cleft alone. She dropped her mouthful of herbs and padded up to me. She tried to comfort me but I wasn't having that. I left the den, choking on sadness.

Fernpaw was waiting for me outside the den. She pressed close to me. My sisters were the only cats who could comfort me. They were the only ones who really understood me. Shadepaw entered camp and dropped her herbs off to Watersong before padding up to me. They escorted me to Mossrock, where the whole clan had gathered. I didn't even hear Rainstar call the meeting.

"Silverpaw, your mentor was Fishcreek, and the clan grieves for him. Now you must learn your warrior skills under a new mentor. Sandclaw you will continue her training. You are a great hunter and kind. I know Silverpaw will learn a lot from you." Oh no! I frowned. No way would I ever accept her as my new mentor.

"They aren't being cruel. Starclan is preparing you for your destiny. For you to completely fulfill your fate, you need to be strong," I heard Mosskit telling me. I clenched my teeth and touch noses with her, but true acceptance would take a long time to earn.

"I will have to name Riverclan's new deputy before midnight. But first I wish to thank Starclan for his life. He was a great hunter, a noble deputy and a good mentor. He would have been a great leader." I recalled Rainstar having three lives left. He could very well be choosing the next leader. The meeting ended, and the clan scattered. I helped the elders bring my mentor into the heart of the camp so we could all share tougnes with him one last time.

I stayed by his side with my sisters until Rainstar called, "Let all cats old enough to swim gather around the Mossrock for a clan meeting." The moon was rising in the sky. Rainstar took that as his signal to speak. "It is my job to name Riverclan's new deputy. I say these words before all of Starclan and Fishcreek so they can hear and approve my choice. Smallflower will be the new deputy."

Fernpaw was the first to cheer, since she was Smallflower's apprentice. The clan joined in. "Smallflower! Smallflower!" She dipped her head in acknowledgement.

"Thank you Riverclan. I vow to serve you the best I can." The happiness was too much for me. I ran to Fishcreek and buried my head in his might have had a rocky start but a bond had quickly formed between us. The night slipped away but I stayed that way the whole time, ignoring everything but the pain.