The TARDIS' lighting kept changing back and forth as it bobbed in the time vortex. One minute, it was a harmless, pleasant green, happy that its inhabitants had figured it all out, and the next it was a whiny red that urged her pilot to take her to Stormcage.
It wailed, and the Doctor peeked his head from around the door to Clara's bedroom. "Will you please hush up, Sexy? We're going, we're going… She just needs some time to get used to things, and I need to figure out what I'm going to say to River, all right?"
The TARDIS keened again in protest but then switched to a bubbly green, gleeful over the fact that her thief and his daughter were reunited.
The Doctor shook his head at the interior lighting and turned back to Clara's room. It had been decorated with the desktop version of a cloudy blue sky with autumn leaves blowing periodically by. Posters from all of their travel destinations so far covered one of the room's walls, while the other had a huge bookcase and a comfy armchair. Every inch of it was Clara, spunky, clever Clara. His brilliant companion who, up until fifteen minutes ago, he assumed was a random woman. An important woman who clearly was a message from the universe that he hadn't deciphered until a few moments ago.
Clara had been following him in different forms across the universe, and he hadn't been able to figure out why. He'd only just realized that it was his own daughter, sent to himself by himself via the TARDIS in an attempt to save her life. He'd been terrified that it would take centuries to find her again, but she'd managed to find him before he even knew she was alive.
Lyradesphielumandar. Lyra Song. His clever girl.
Clara was lying on her bed with a pillow over her head, still quivering with shock. He sat on the edge of her bed and twiddled his thumbs. "If it makes you feel any better, I didn't know either, and you were only a few hours old when we met. You're not really required to remember who you are."
"But I do," she moaned under the pillow. "I remember everything, Doctor—I kissed you! Back with the Snowmen!"
"Yeah, well…" The Doctor didn't really know how to respond to that one. "Weirder things have happened. I snogged my mother-in-law on the night before her wedding."
"WHAT?"
"We should definitely go through family history. Besides, Marty McFly kissed his mum! And don't even get me started on Luke and Leia, because they are seven different kinds of warped. Besides, we don't think that way now! We didn't back then, either, not really! It was more of a 'heat of the moment' thing anyway! I've been treating you like a little sister…maybe that translates! Maybe I knew it on a biological level!"
Clara cried harder into her pillow and he panicked, flailing his limbs over her form.
"Clara, please…I know this is difficult to understand, but I've only just found you, and I can't lose you again." The Doctor decided to put a hand on her back. It usually soothed River. "Clara, darling…this doesn't make a lot of sense to me, but let me have the chance to explain it, and to…be your dad. I never thought I'd get the chance to say those words again. I thought I was too late."
Clara sniffed and lifted her head from under her pillow. The Doctor's heart couldn't help but warm up at the sight of her red nose and puffy eyes. It was endearing. Usually crying terrified him, especially when the tears came out of female eyes, but seeing them come from his daughter made him want to hold her. So he did—he wrapped his arms around Clara and held her close. "Clara, Clara, Clara…"
"That's not my name," she whispered, clutching his shirt. "All over the world, I've been Clara Oswin Oswald. Or Oswin Oswald. But you didn't name me that."
"No, I didn't."
"And the parents I remember…I've had many different ones, but they were never really mine. I wasn't related to them." She shuddered. "I'm so lost. I can barely remember you, but I know it's true. You showed me the constellation and you told me you loved me." She looked up at him. "What does Mum look like? River Song, I mean? She's my real mother, right?"
"Why don't we go see her right now?" The Doctor jumped off the bed and gave a hand out to Clara. "She will be thrilled to meet you. She made me promise to take you to her as soon as I found you."
Clara looked more than a little terrified. But meeting her real mother for the first time was a very tempting offer, despite her confusion. She took his hand. "Will you explain everything?"
"Everything, I promise. Come on, Clara."
"I want to know something first." She sat down on her leather armchair and crossed her arms. "Clara isn't my name."
"No, it's not. When I was typing…well, that's a long story, and River should be around to hear it. We named you Lyra, after the constellation I showed you. It's River's favorite," he explained, sitting cross-legged in front of the chair, "because Time Lords and part-Time Lords can hear the song it plays. You could hear it when you were a baby and you can hear it now."
"But I remember…it was a lot longer than that," she said. "When you first held me, you said something a lot longer, and you said other people shouldn't hear it."
"Time Lord names are given by their parents at birth, and they usually have a special meaning behind them. Some of these names have meanings so powerful, that when they're uttered by certain people, things happen. So, most names are kept a secret and shared under very special circumstances."
"What are those circumstances?"
"I'm afraid I can't tell you that. When the time comes, if ever, for you to tell someone your full name, you will know."
"What is it, then?"
He smiled and leaned forward to whisper it. "Lyradesphielumandar."
She repeated it and wrinkled her nose. "Mouthful, that one. What does it mean?"
The Doctor considered the native Gallifreyan. "Roughly translated, it means, 'The song that illuminates the answer'."
"What's the answer?"
"Isn't that your job to tell me?" he laughed. "Anyway, most Time Lords pick titles to use. I'm the Doctor. I used to have a friend named the Master. You get to pick one yourself, if you want. Your mum picked one, and she's only human plus."
"What's Mum's?"
"The Professor. But she also goes by River Song. But she does have a Gallifreyan name, and so do I. If you want to keep going by Clara or if you want us to call you Lyra, or whatever you'd like, it's fine."
She bit her lip. "Can I get back to you on that?"
"Fine by me. Anyway, don't you want to meet your mum?" The Doctor tried to leave Clara's room again, this time managing to escape to the console and firing it up. The TARDIS was happy to steer its way to Stormcage and parked itself in its familiar spot in River's cell. "She is going to be so happy to meet you."
"Oh, I am so not happy to see you," River growled when the TARDIS landed in her cell. She crossed her arms over her chest to show the Doctor she meant business.
He winced when he walked out of the blue box, taking in the picture of his very cross wife. He'd left her only a few minutes ago, in his timeline, but he was clearly late. "Sorry, honey—how long has it been, exactly…?"
"Three weeks, you perfect idiot. Did you not think to check on me?" She huffed and blew a wayward curl out of her ice-blue eyes that could cut a hole in his hearts. His poor, beautiful River Song—she'd been left alone to her grief. Well, he was about to change that. Best to ease into it, though.
He walked up to her and kissed her sweetly, melting the ice in her eyes. "I love you so much. So, so much, River."
She blinked in confusion. "What's gotten into you, sweetie? You don't say those words unless you know you're about to get in trouble with me."
"Oh, you're definitely going to kill me for this one, but I wanted you to know before you destroy me that I adore you." He led her inside the TARDIS. "You're going to want to sit down for this one."
"Did you crash my motorcycle again, dear?" She noticed Clara, who was standing in shock by the opening to the corridor. "Oh, hello, darling. Have we met yet? You must be Clara—the Doctor's told me all about you."
"River—" the Doctor said in a warning tone that River always ignored, and she cut him off and bounced up the steps to shake Clara's hand.
Poor Clara. She had to deal with all of River Song, in all of her splendor and intimidation, walking right up to her with huge hair and big curves and gun and prison uniform and flirty smile. She could have melted into a puddle of fear and terror. River pumped her hand with a mischievous grin. "Clara Oswin Oswald. You're a clever one—and cute, too."
"River, trust me, don't embarrass yourself anymore," the Doctor sighed, leading both women to the parlor he had a few halls down. There were several comfy chairs and a roaring fireplace that they arrayed themselves on. The Doctor sat on a huge, high-backed armchair and stooped over, fiddling with his thumbs. River leaned seductively on a settee and Clara placed herself like a china doll on a footstool with perfect posture.
"Clara, dear, I can't say thank you enough for saying yes to the Doctor," River laughed. "He was so alone after…well, we both lost some people very important to us. And I told him, I told him, he couldn't travel alone. And then he got you, and now he's happy again. Though, dear, I'd appreciate it if you could tone down the flirting a bit—I know it's difficult with a face like his, but he's a bit taken."
"River…" The Doctor didn't know exactly how to approach this. "What was I doing after I left you a few weeks ago?"
Her face fell, but she tried to hide it. She'd been taking care of herself for the past three weeks. "You went to go look for our…for…you went to look for Lyra." She shook her head. "I know, sweetie. I've been looking, too. But I want to hear more about your and Clara's adventures. It's a nice diversion from all the…well, I've had a lot on my mind."
Clara gulped. Not once did she take her eyes off River.
River looked puzzled. "Sweetie?"
"River, look at Clara."
"I'm looking at her. She's wonderful."
"Tell me…who…what does she look like?"
River laughed a bit and studied Clara's blanched face. "Dark hair, straight, floppy—no offense, Clara. Brown eyes. Great smile."
"Not curly, then."
"Nope." She enunciated the 'p' with relish and grinned at the Doctor until she noticed his expression. "Doctor?"
He sighed deeply and then gave her a small smile. "She didn't get your hair, River. Beautiful, of course, the most gorgeous girl, but the poor thing got my hair."
The ghost of River's laugh remained, disbelieving, for a moment until it died away and her eyes went blank. "But…how…" She stared at him and switched her gaze quickly to Clara, then the Doctor, then Clara again, and then backed off the settee.
"River, please—"
"Shut up." She glared at the Doctor and effectively shut him up. Slowly, she approached the still-frozen Clara. She moved like she was making her way through water, bringing a tentative hand up to her face, afraid to touch. With a careful hand, she touched the outline of Clara's cheek and traced her eyebrow, then put both hands around her face and tried to memorize the twenty-odd years they'd missed together. "Brown eyes," she chuckled in disbelief. "Rory had hazel—your granddad. And the Doctor has a sort of grey-green. I remember…" A tear slipped out of her right eye. "You had brown eyes, when you were born. First regeneration, and all that."
"Mum…" Clara hadn't blinked since River came toward her, completely awestruck.
Without another word, River folded her into her arms and held her as close as humanly—or Time Lord-ly—possible. Rocking back and forth, River just cried into Clara's hair while Clara remained frozen, allowing River to rock her over and over while just repeating, "Mum…Mum…Mum…"
It was a painful moment to watch. The Doctor could feel the pain radiating off of River from the weeks of utter grief and loss. It was oddly equivalent, in parts, to watching River realize that she'd lost her child. Finding her again, in the most unexpected of places, was uncomfortable for them all. Clara had just realized her true parentage, River had just found out that her husband's secretive new companion was her own daughter, and the Doctor had just found out that his cheeky, enigmatic, mysterious Clara was really his own child—and that he was responsible for her mystery.
He cleared his throat. "River, there are some things I should explain. If you could sit."
River rearranged herself, pulling Clara with her on the settee and firmly grasping her hand. It seemed to be all Clara could take.
They were all silent, unsure of how to begin this new family, until Clara said in a tiny voice, "You told me you'd tell me everything."
"Yes. I did promise." He looked at River for encouragement and began. "You already know me—I'm the Doctor. I'm a Time Lord with a blue box and I travel the universe, and this is your mother, River Song. She's the daughter of my two previous companions, Rory and Amy."
"That's a bit weird."
"It's a bit complicated. Anyway, we were married in an aborted timeline when she tried to kill me because she was kidnapped by a religious order and brainwashed and—"
"Doctor." River shook her head. "Too much. Keep it light."
"Right. Anyway, she's a time traveler with a bit of Time Lady in her, and she's my wife. And somehow, through some strange sort of miracle, she got pregnant with you. Only, I didn't know it until it was too late, and she was kidnapped by another adversary, a real beastie named Jim Moriarty. It was a really nasty business with parallel worlds and paradoxes, and that's when the trouble really started." He looked wearily at Clara. "Do you remember the lesson I gave you about paradoxes?"
"Companionship 101, yeah."
"You became one after that day. By rescuing your mother and defeating Moriarty, we created a paradox around your birth and when you were only a few hours old, though we'd barely gotten to meet you, you disappeared. You didn't exist anymore, but I managed to save you as a file, like a computer, onto the TARDIS mainframe."
"Must be why I'm such a computer whiz," Clara joked. "Besides, it would explain why the TARDIS doesn't like me."
"What do you mean, the TARDIS doesn't like you?" River asked.
Clara shrugged. "She always whinges about when I'm around. She hates me. But maybe she was just trying to get my attention and make me remember everything. Or maybe it's because I'm a paradox and she'd having trouble housing me."
The Doctor smiled. "Oh, you are clever. Didn't I tell you, River—didn't I say she'd be clever?"
River smiled. "She's brilliant."
Clara mirrored her smile and gave her mother's hand a squeeze. "Apparently you can inherit cleverness. And a taste for mischief. And being sexy."
"You are so my daughter."
"Ladies!" the Doctor coughed. "Focus! So, I saved her into the computer mainframe onboard, but I was distracted when I did it—I was thinking about you, Clara, but not you as my daughter, you as my companion whom I left behind for chips, and I was thinking about you, Clara, not as my companion but as my daughter, Lyra, and I sort of typed Clara instead of Lyra, which is an understandable mistake, considering there is only a two-letter difference—"
"Doctor," both women said in unison.
"Sorry. So, I emailed you out into the universe to be downloaded into different bodies and have thirteen different regenerations—thirteen different lives. It was the best I could do to ensure that you could live. And now it makes sense, and now you remember all the times we've met before. You met me first when you were a Dalek, and then in London with the Snowmen."
River shook her head. "That means, you remember—you kissed him."
"I didn't know!"
"Oh, sweetie, I don't care anymore—I only pity you, poor darling."
The Doctor giggled. "I sent out copies of you all over the Earth, all over the universe—and this entire time I've known you, I've been trying to figure out your mystery. Why you keep coming up. It's simple, really—I keep finding your file over and over. The TARDIS was either looking for you, or I am just the luckiest man there ever was, because I found my daughter before I even knew I had one, and she's perfect."
Clara grinned. "This is so weird. So I'm a Time Lady?"
"Not exactly. You used to be, but after you ceased to exist, the only part left of you was your mind and potential. That's what was downloaded into a form that was approximately what you would have looked like if you'd grown up as a Time Lady."
Her lips curved into a mischievous smile. "Can I drive the TARDIS then?"
"She'd never let you. Furthermore, I'd never let you. You're grounded, Miss Oswald," he (almost completely) joked. "Is it too weird? I mean, this is all a lot to take in."
Clara shook her head. "I can deal with it. I think. It'll take some getting-used-to, but I feel…right. Like everything in my head is in its proper place again." She looked at River. "Wow. You're just…You're really cool. I can't believe I have a new mum, a real mum. My other one, she died when I was a teenager—but then again, I can remember two other mothers. Was I related to them?"
"Not genetically," the Doctor explained. "But they did raise you, so they count in some way as your mother, I think. They certainly loved you."
Clara nodded and stood up. "Right, then. Resurrected daughter demands a hug."
With a hearty laugh, the Doctor drew Clara into an iron embrace, followed quickly by River Song. Neither parent had any intention of letting go, and after a moment, Clara was returning the hug she had initiated and they all felt, within the heat of the circle they'd created, that somehow, wounds they'd considered irreparable could find a way to be healed.
The Doctor pulled away first. "I think this merits a photo. River, old girl, will you fetch the camera?"
River made no move to let go of her newly found daughter.
"River, please, I promise she won't disappear. Please get the camera?"
"You're definitely going to owe me one," she sighed, reluctantly letting go of Clara. "Don't move—I'm picking up where I left off when I get back. And I want to know everything about you, sweetie, every single thing I've missed."
She hopped off to the closet across the hall to search for a camera, leaving the Doctor and Clara alone. It would be easier for them—they had an established dynamic they could depend on, though the flirting would have to stop, immediately. Clara gazed at the fire and suddenly felt very vulnerable. "River is wonderful."
"She is."
"Do you love her?" The question seemed out of the blue, but Clara had been worried. The Doctor showed so little genuine emotion that it was hard to believe he'd ever bared his feelings in such a way.
The Doctor sported an odd grin. "Why do you ask?"
"Well, it's you, Doctor. She doesn't travel with us, so you two don't live together."
"It's not like that." He blew air through his teeth. "We're not like that. She travels, and I travel. If we were together all the time, we'd go mad. But it doesn't mean I don't—I do tell her, you know. I tell her I love her."
"And you do."
"Yes, dear. I do love that barking mad lady. It's complicated and it always will be, but I do happen love your mother, Clara."
Clara beamed. "Good. I love to hear a good love story. It's good to know I'm part of one."
River rushed back in and pecked the Doctor on the cheek before returning to her daughter. "Come on, sweetie, I want to hear every detail. And then we're going to make a visit."
