Spark of Genius
Disclaimer: I don't own buffy verse, girl genius verse, DC comics or any of that, so give it a rest.
AN: I think I'm going to continue this story. This is the plot bunny part that was itching in my head to get out while I was sleeping last night. Hope you enjoy the fun.
'Thought'
"Speech"
Chapter 3: It's Alive!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Are you ready?
Igor: Are you sure this is how they did it?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Yes! It's all written down in the notes! Now tie off the kites and hurry down as fast as you can!
Igor: What's the hurry?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: There's a possibility of electrocution! Do you understand?
[no answer, shouts]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: I said, there is a possibility of electrocution! Do you understand?
Igor: [suddenly appears next to Fredrick] I understand. I understand. Why are you shouting
~Young Frankenstein, the movie.
Xander was rudely awakened by the sound of his alarm clock, which was apparently the sound of an air-horn.
BWAAAAWAAAAAAAA!
"Ahhhh!" Xander screamed as he jumped in the seat he had fallen asleep in, causing him to rapidly flail his arms as with his feet on the table in front of him he lost his balance and flipped backwards to smack his head on the concrete floor of the junkyard warehouse.
"Owwww…" Xander groaned as he wincingly looked at the ceiling and wonder why the hell he had an alarm clock that used an air-horn.
Realizing that the concrete hadn't hurt that much, he chose to lie on the cool cement floor and wonder at why he had set an alarm.
'Hmmm, that's strange; I don't remember having an alarm clock when I went to sleep last night.' Xander thought as he counted the rivets in the steel roof above him and realized that they were a prime number. He was distracted by how much this new brain power and physical abilities had changed him. Before his mind could wander to what Willow and the rest of the gang were doing and how much he missed them, a sound interrupted his thinking.
"TooT!" a musical note tooted beside him.
Rolling his head to the side so that he could see what made the sound, Xander came eyes to 'eye' with the little pocket watch clank. A little clank that was holding an air-horn assembly salvaged from a big-rig truck.
Closing his eyes and putting his hand over his eyes, Xander again looked to check if a miniature robot was standing there blinking and waving at him while its other hand held an air-horn.
'Maybe I did hit my head harder than I thought?' Xander questioned to himself.
"Toot Toot, TOOT!" the little clank musically whistled.
"Yes yes, I'm awake already! Good morning to you too." Xander replied without thinking as he started to pick himself up off the floor, only to hesitate and look at the clank, wondering how in the world he had understood what the little robot had said.
"Toot Toot." The clank said with a wave.
"Um, you're welcome for creating you." Xander replied with a raised eyebrow to the little clank's thanks. "Um, just one question, when did I create you?"
"Toot, TOOT, toot toot." The clank replied as it chucked the air-horn assembly over its shoulder, were it flew for a few feet before skidding across the floor.
"Ok, so I made you while I was asleep." Xander said as he fully stood up and rubbed his eyes to get the sleep out of them, "Guess I picked up 'Mother' Heterodyne's little sleep building habit; that could be trouble if it is anything like the comic." Xander continued to mumble to himself as he shook his head and looked at the space around him.
Xander turned back towards the table and saw piles of half created clanks and bits and pieces of mechanical clockworks scattered around the table, interspersed with the doggy-bags of Italian food that he had taken home from the restaurant the night before.
Turning back to the clank Xander asked, "Ok, so I created you, what's your name then little guy?"
"Toot!" The clank replied, hands on its 'hips.'
"Oh, oh, sorry, you're a 'girl.' I understand, you don't have a name yet. Ok, I'll just call you "Toots" or you can go by Number 1, or first mate if you prefer?" Xander said, hands raised to deflect the ire of the little 'female' clank; apparently he couldn't escape somewhat bossy females, even in this new dimension.
"Toot toot." The clank replied.
"Ok, now that that is out of the way. First, it looks like we are going to be camping out here at the warehouse until I can figure out what to do." Xander said as he righted the chair and sat down in it; tilting it back and kicking his feet back up on the table.
Steepling his fingers, he looked out over the piles of truck and tractor-trailer parts that littered the warehouse floor, as ideas started to percolate up from the depths of his brain. His thoughts were slightly jarred away from the insanely genius very cool plans that were going on in his head when he remembered that he didn't know if he could stay at the junk yard.
"Hey toots, have you seen any sign of other humans around here in the junk yard?" Xander asked as he looked down at the clank, which was now climbing the leg of the table to get to the top of it.
"Toot toot."
"Well, besides all of the human junk that is piled up around here." Xander said as he shook his head at the clank's literal interpretation of the question.
The clank finished shimmying up the table leg and hopped to the top of the tabletop.
"Toot, toot, TOOT toOT Toot." The clank responded, followed by it picking up a screwdriver and a hammer and starting to pond and tinker with the clockwork mechanism inside of a brass box that lay on the table.
"Oh really?" Xander asked in reply, "So the sign on the front gate of the junkyard says that this place is full and that it is abandoned until further notice?" Xander answered back.
"Toot!"
"Alright alright, I know that is what you just said, but I'm still getting a hang of being able to understand everything you say." Xander said as he held his hands up in defense. "I can't believe that I built such a defensive little thing like you…" Xander said under his breath as he looked around.
"Hmmm, defensive…" Xander said to himself as he looked around the warehouse floor. "It looks like we can live her for a while, but we need to make sure that we are going to stay safe and comfortable." Xander stated out loud as he thought of all of the supervillians, aliens, thieves and other bad things that existed in the DC comics he had read as a kid.
"Toot, Toot." The clank stated, drawing Xander's attention to what it was doing on the table.
Bang, Crack! Ting!
Putting the final touches on the latching door on the back of the brass box, the little clank hit it with a hammer. In response, little arms and legs pushed their way out of the box like telescoping antenna, ending in little clawed hands and feet. Rolling itself over and into a standing position, the box turned towards Xander, and a little white eye opened and blinked at him.
"Honk Honk!" The new little clank honked at him and waved.
Xander merely blinked back at the little clank for a second, before a slightly crazy smile came upon his face.
"Ok you two, I get it. Now, Go forth and multiply!" He said, a wacky light seeming to shine from his face.
"Oh, and you are number two." Xander said, pointing to the little brass box on legs.
"Honk Honk!" "Toot!" Both clanks sounded, as they saluted Xander.
Both clanks then proceeded to pick up a hammer in one hand, a wrench or screwdriver in the other, and lept off the table into the piles of truck parts and broken machinery. The sounds of banging, small explosions, power saws, and ratchets being turned began to come from the piles of parts, as Xander merely smiled a slightly crazy smile.
Cracking his fingers, Xander hopped out of the chair and began to look around for something for him to work on. His eyes finally came to rest on the hulking, slightly rusty, form of what looked to be the crew cab and exposed engine compartment of a big flat faced semi-truck.
Memories flashed through his head, happy memories of times spent with his buddy Jesse, happy memories that were now twisted and brought to life with the possibilities of Science!
"WaHA HA HAHA HA!" Xander started to cackle manically as suddenly a wrench and a roll of duct-tape seemed to magically appear in his hands. Snatching a pair of goggles off of an acetylene gas tank welding rig that was sitting next to the truck, Xander dived into his new project.
After all, every teenaged boy needs to have a set of wheels to impress the girls with…
The sun was just setting, but the sky was black due to the storm clouds that had rolled in over Metropolis, effectively blocking out any of the pretty colors of the departing daylight. At the junkyard on the hill overlooking metropolis, the warehouse was looking and sounding decidedly different than when Xander had first arrived.
First of all there was sound of the maniacal laughter that issued up, with the occasional giggle of insane mirth. This was punctuated by the sound of hammering, the screeching of tortured metal, and the myriad of hooting, honking, tooting, tweeting and other musical sounds that seemed to come in a cacophony that would make a sane person back away slowly.
Yes, the sounds issuing from inside the building were not of the sane, more than likely the sounds would lead somebody to deem the inhabitants of the warehouse to be "a few fries short of a happy meal." And then there were the kites.
Blue ones, purple ones, red ones, some with spots, some with stripes, some with stripes and spots, and even one with Bill Clinton's face painted on it were flying from lightning rods that dotted the top of the junkyard's warehouse; kites that were flying just in time for the oncoming thunderstorm.
Booom! Boom Boom! Thunder!
Lightning split the sky as the storm moved from over Metropolis and encroached over the metal strewn junk yard. The junkyard and all of its superconductive metals were like a magnet to the lightning from the storm, and the kites were the highest point in the junkyard.
CRASHHH! ZAAAAPPPPP! Zap Boom! CRASH ZAAAAPPP! CRASH! BOOOM BOOOOOOOOOOOM!
The lightning ripped out the sky, striking down the kites and sending their flaming forms fluttering to the ground; the kite with the picture of Richard Nixon seeming to scream "Oh NO Mr. Bill!" as it was ignited by the blasts. The dark sky was continually illuminated by the lightning as the storm expended its fury on the kites and the metal warehouse on the hill.
In a matter of thirty minutes, the storm passed as it had seemed to expend what energy it had while over the junkyard; the flaming remains of the kites were soon extinguished by the gentle rain as the winds quieted and slowly gusted by.
Then the laughter began.
"Bwa ha ha… Wa Ha Ha HA HA HA HA HA BWA HA HA HA HA!" The sounds of Xander's insane laughter cut through the sound of the drizzle on the junkyards many surfaces.
" IT LIVES! IT'S ALIVE! WA HA HA HA HA HA HA!" Xander continued to laugh.
"Number Five's Alive!" Interrupted a high pitched electronic voice. Followed quickly by the sound of a boot thudding off of something metal.
Thud!
"Shut up you, you totally messed up my mad genius groove." Xander's voice pouted, "Go patrol the junkyard and make sure that nothing bothers us, ok?"
"A-Okay Xander Sir Buddy Old Pal!" the voice of Number Five stated as the robot headed out of the warehouse to patrol the junkyard.
"I'll see that a couple more of you are built soon, to share the load and for fun." Xander's voice trailed out of the warehouse doors as the sentient, non-pacifist, combat robot began its patrol route through the drizzle.
"Okey Dokey Smokey," Number Five replied with a wave as it closed the doors to the warehouse.
"Ok," Xander's voice stated, "Now back to you big guy. Let's get that power source of yours all buttoned up, and then we will go for a drive."
The sound of a revving engine of some large machine was all the reply that Xander received.
The week had progressed quickly as Xander kept his hands busy in fixing up the warehouse and trying to keep himself from thinking about returning to his own universe and how much he missed Willow and the rest of the Scooby gang. In the meantime he had bigger problems to deal with, namely he was quickly running out of the money that he had 'requisitioned' from the thugs. He needed more money and soon, as he was apparently a growing boy based on the amount of food he found himself eating every day. He noted that he seemed to be getting stronger, not needing to use a jack to pick up the front of the semi truck that he had worked on, and Xander had been able to fix up the warehouse to have a sleeping and eating area as well as a working area; namely, the work area was any flat surface not currently being used for food or sleep. The junkyard had been surprisingly helpful in providing salvageable kitchen equipment and even a washer and a dryer, but he needed to purchase a mattress for his metal bed frame and he needed more food. The little clanks continued to 'go forth and multiply' while at the same time being helpful in finding workable materials for his machines, his defenses, as well as finding scrap metals that were worth some serious money.
Abandoned boxes of x-rays were processed for their silver. Gold was scrapped from computer and tv components, and some rather rare mixes of platinum and other heavy metals were piled up in a corner of the warehouse for Xander to exchange for cash in the city. The little clanks had even found a large red ruby that had apparently been used as a focal point for an alien weapon, but Xander figured that it could be used for a death ray or a Twinkie processing machine, something worth more to him than merely its cash value.
That lead to him being where he currently was, trying to find a parking spot in Metropolis, a parking spot big enough for his large blue and red semi-truck crew cab; without the trailer.
"Parallel parking this big guy is a bitch!" Xander griped as he finally was able to back the semi into a loading zone in front of a store that was labeled "The Gold Exchange" with big pictures of golden doubloons and gold ingots painted on the glass windows; windows that were behind big steel bars.
Stepping down out of the truck, Xander made sure to lock up as he headed towards the door to the store.
"Bwa-beep, chirp chirp. Warning, protected by Scooby" The alarm system on his semi truck stated as Xander pressed the button on his key chain.
Smirking to himself, he opened the door of the store to the sound of its little bell's chiming… just as a display case was launched out into the street through the glass window that was less than a foot from his head.
Leaping back out the door to the street, Xander did a controlled roll across the sidewalk before popping up into a defensive stance.
A metal foot shaped like a garbage can lid stepped out of the hole in the front of "The Gold Exchange," followed by a boxy metal leg and the body of a cobbled together robot. The robot had red optical sensors for eyes and colored lights on its square chest, making it look like a 7 foot tall version of a 1950's toy mechanical robot, with flashing eye action. The robot carried a steal safe in its two clawed hands; the safe looking like it had been previously bolted to the ground before the robot decided to steal it.
Following behind the robot was a short rotund man, with curly hair, beady eyes, and reflective round glasses on, dressed in a foppish multicolored outfit. The man was carrying a bag that clinked and sounded like coins.
"Um, let me guess." Xander said out loud as memories of Superman comic books flashed through his head, "You're Toyman?" Xander finished, quirking his head at the little man.
"Why yes my good lad. Why yes I am, shall we play?" Toyman stated with a slight British accent, obviously not right in the head.
An evil grin spread across Xander's face and a weird glint came to his eyes.
"Sure! By the way, nice robot you got there… But mine's bigger." Xander finished as he took a couple steps back towards his truck.
Toyman merely looked at Xander for a second confused, he was about to say something when some catchy music started to blast from speakers on Xander's truck and it began to transform.
The shadow above Xander and Toyman grew, and grew, and grew, until a hulking thirty foot red and blue robot stood looking down at Toyman and his thieving robot.
"Optimus, would you please deal with this robot and detain Toyman." Xander commanded as he looked up and over his shoulder at his robot.
Toyman was speechless for a second, and unfortunately for Toyman that was all the time it took for Optimus to plant his fist straight through the thieving robot's chest and to retract it; pulling out a mass of wires from the smaller robot's chest cavity and causing it to keel over from lack of power.
"Eeep!" Toyman screeched as he pulled out a pogo stick and attempted to jump on it to make an escape.
Such was not to be, for Optimus reached out and snagged Toyman by the back of his coat, hoisting the little round man into the air and causing Toyman to drop his 'escape pogo stick.'
"What would you like to do with him Xander Prime?" Optimus's booming voice questioned Xander.
Xander smiled up at his boyhood dream come to life, "Let's just wrap him up with some of these parking meters, I'm sure Superman will be here sooner rather than later, and I don't really want to have to deal with him this early in my stay in this world." The sound of the alarm from the store punctuated Xander's statement, as apparently the owner had finally worked up the nerve to press the alarm button.
Optimus nodded and did just that, pulling a couple of parking meters out of the ground and using them to securely tie Toyman in loops of crumpled steel. Then, at Xander's pointing towards a street lamp, Optimus fastened Toyman upside down to the lamp of the streetlight.
Xander walked under the dangling Toyman, whose face was starting to turn red.
"Now normally the hero would make some sort of witty comment about how you should have played better with others, or how my toys are better than yours. Personally, I'm partial to 'My robot can beat up your robot.'" Xander said with a smirk before he took a look around.
"However, since I don't want to wait around for Superman, I'm going to hightail it out of here, so have fun in your time out." Xander stated with a smirk and a jaunty salute before he walked back to Optimus.
Xander nodded to Optimus and the large robot transformed back into his truck form. Xander, in turn, hopped up into the drivers spot before starting up the truck and pulling out onto the street to drive away.
As Xander turned the corner from the block that The Gold Exchange was on, he pressed a button and little spray nozzles popped out all over the frame of the truck and started changing the color of the truck from its blue and red paint job to a black and silver paint job. Pressing another button the flat front of truck cab telescoped out and extended to change the truck's form to look like a Peterbilt truck.
Poking his head out the window, Xander looked at the randomly selected paint job and shook his head in disgust.
"Going to have to work on that randomizer program, otherwise people are going to start thinking that Batman upgraded to a semi-truck and decided to visit Metropolis." Xander said with a bit of disgust.
Xander smiled as he saw a blue and red streak fly quickly down the street above him. Xander drove farther into downtown Metropolis, looking for another store to exchange his gold and silver for cash.
Behind him at The Gold Exchange Xander left a confused Superman and a Toyman who kept humming to himself about 'robots in disguise.'
AN: There you go, short but fun times. Xander is getting himself set up and then we shall see what he does next. We shall see what Xander left behind in the Sunnydale verse in the next chapter, as well as some more fun and crazy times with our newest mad scientist.
Poll: Should Xander attempt to go back to the Sunnydale verse
Or
Should he stay in the Justice League Verse?
Let me know!