Chapter Five Summary - Sam and Daniel arrive at his house to find that the moving party has increased by four people. Lantash "confesses" something to Sam that makes her even more glad that she chose to accept Daniel as Lantash's new lifemate.
"Italics" - Symbiote-Host communication
Always Be Ours
Chapter Five
A Wonderful Bond
Daniel and Sam walked up the steps juggling three large pizza's, two twelve packs, two pillows, and three movies, having been unable to make a decision, i.e. agree on, which movie to watch. Walking into Daniel's house, they almost dropped everything. Chaos reigned.
The moving crew had enlarged by four. Janet and Cassie were busily going through Daniel's clothes. Jack and Teal'c had unpacked every box and General Hammond was re-arranging furniture with the help of Paul Davis who had come in from Washington that afternoon and been astounded by the news that Major Carter and Daniel Jackson were getting married and having a baby.
Seeing Sam walk in carrying a pillow, three movies, and three pizzas he jumped forward, and took them out of her hands, before guiding her to a chair, and admonishing her not to overdue it, while she looked at him in astonishment, not yet accustomed to being "pregnant".
He then put the movies on an end table and added the pizzas to the three already in the kitchen warming in the oven, others also having thought to bring food and drink.
Daniel followed with a pillow, and two twelve packs, some instinct having told him to get a case, not a twelve pack. Paul grasped the twelve packs, shoving them into the fridge, while Daniel threw the pillow, and the keys, onto the kitchen counter.
"Hey, Paul, when did you get in? What's up? Nothing drastic I hope? Meaning, of course, I have absolutely no intention of coming in off leave, so do not try to call, either Major Carter or myself, back in for anything short of an all out galaxy wide war." Daniel opened a beer and took a very long drink, groaned, and took another drink. "And I don't even like beer."
Paul grinned. "Nothing drastic, actually. I just need to go over some things with General Hammond, before writing up a report I have due in a few weeks. So you and the Major can take your leave without fear of being called back by me. Ah, so far, anyway. I can't promise it will stay that way, though."
Daniel grimaced good-naturedly, shrugging, "Tell me about it." He raised his eyebrows questioningly and pointed with his beer, "Back into the fray?"
Paul laughed, "Sure. Why not?"
Daniel laughed back, "Bodily harm, injuries, and pain?"
"Dr. Jackson, I'm shocked. I never took you for a Coward."
"Ah, but then, you haven't been around them as often as I have."
Paul lifted his beer in a salute, "Touché," he answered, before heading back into the living room. They were a comradely bunch, and he enjoyed the times he managed to be here when they were together off base, and he was invited to join in.
There was a lack of formality during off-time that didn't exist in D.C. When you were there it seemed like you were always on display, even during off-duty hours. Here, once you left the base, you were allowed to be yourself. Within reason, and as long as you didn't embarrass the USAF.
Sometimes, he seriously thought about transferring to the SGC. Someday, he'd do it, too. He just needed a push, just some little thing that could make the pain of moving more than half-way across the country worthwhile.
His eyes settled on Janet Fraiser. They'd been doing that a lot lately when he came here. He wondered if she could be the push he needed. He'd never know if he didn't make a move to get to know her better. Maybe he'd ask Daniel a little more about her after while.
Sam sat in the chair where Paul Davis had put her and appeared to listen to the chatter going on around her. In reality, she was listening to Lantash, "Samantha, I am going to become dormant and do some more healing and regaining of my strength. The more I rest, the faster I will be able to blend with Daniel. I will only answer you in an emergency. Please, do not be alarmed if you feel as if I am not here."
"I understand, Lantash. Daniel and I will talk to you in the morning then?"
"Yes, but—Samantha, there is one other thing that I should bring to your attention, if I am to be completely honest with you. Now, is not exactly the best time, but I feel I should tell you before you and Daniel become intimate tonight, and I may not awaken until morning, as you know. We did not plan on having this many people here, or I would have given you this information earlier."
"It concerns me staying dormant while you and Daniel become intimate. There is more to the situation than I have told you, although, everything I have told you is the truth. The information about the difficulty when mates share the same body and crave physical release is exactly as I explained to you."
Sam glanced around the room and no one appeared to be paying attention to her. She leaned back in the chair and relaxed as if she were resting. No one would bother her in that case, she was fairly sure. "Lantash, whatever you have to tell me will not change how I feel about you. Please, don't keep things from me."
She felt his embrace and smiled faintly. "It is nothing terrible, my Samantha, but I do not know if you will be able to understand my hesitation, or if it will seem inconsequential to you."
"Lantash, if it is important to you, it will be important to me, and if it is something that bothers you this much, then I will treat it seriously, I promise you."
She felt him hesitate one last time, before saying, starkly, "I have only been in a female body once in my entire life and then for only a few days; therefore, I find the thought of being made love to by a male quite disturbing. My female host did not have a lover, or if she did, she was not with him during the time we shared her body. We never planned to stay together; I was meant for someone else and, in fact, left her as soon as he arrived."
Sam's eyes widened slightly before she gasped to herself and him. "Oh, god, Lantash, I'm so sorry. I never even considered that. Of course, you don't want to make love to Daniel. I don't blame you. That would be—you don't need to say anything more. I understand."
She paused, and then, as another thought became conscious, she asked sharply, "Lantash, what would you have done, if you had stayed with me permanently? Between feeling the revulsion of being made love to by a man, and wanting me as a man wants a woman, your position would have been intolerable. And you wouldn't have told me, would you?"
"Samantha, that would have been a different situation entirely. Had I stayed with you, I would have blended completely with you and taken on your female hormones, thus changing my urges. It might have been hard in the beginning, and I would, perhaps, have remained dormant at first, but soon the hormones would have worked on me. Eventually, I would have begun to feel and react in a more female manner."
"We would have been all right, Samantha, the scenario you are envisioning would not have occurred." He felt relief surge through her as the horrendous visions of him miserable and trapped in her body disappeared to be replaced by a more feminine version of him. Totally wrong, of course, but if it helped her to accept the idea, he would not correct her.
"The other part, the urge to love you physically, would not have changed for many years according to what I have heard from others, no matter how much your female hormones tried to help; I would always have wanted you as a man wants a woman."
"As you know, it is rare for a Tok'Ra to have a fully human mate. It is even rarer to have one who then takes the symbiote on the mate's death. Nonetheless, over the last two thousand years, it has happened, and all of their stories are the same. It is many, many years, sometimes never, before the physical urges and yearning for the mate abate."
"It is not a good solution, and most do as we are planning to do, even years after the fact, simply because the urge to love one another does not abate. I am sorry, Samantha, but I see no point in hiding this from you any longer, as it is already beginning for me, and it could happen to you as well."
"Since it is beginning to appear that changing hosts is a distinct possibility, and that I may not remain within you, I would rather not experience the sexual experience from the female perspective, though I have been told by some that it is enlightening."
"Therefore, if I happen to awaken during the act and do not find it as upsetting as I fear, I have to admit, I am curious to experience your climax. I would also like to allow you to feel what Daniel is feeling, which I could do.
"So, if, and only if, I awaken during your intimacy, I may take part at the ending, for that would not be the same as participating in the totality of the love-making."
"Furthermore, I must admit that it is a gift which I wish to be able to give to Daniel, just as I can give you the gift of his climax. If, that is, you think you would wish him to experience what you feel when he makes love to you. Do you believe that this is something you would wish me to do? I cannot promise to do it, but I can at least attempt it."
"I would love to give that to him, Lantash, but not at your expense. If it proves to be something that you can do comfortably, then yes. Otherwise, no."
He agreed, then said, "So, the reality is that there are actually two reasons that it is better if I remain dormant, while you and Daniel become intimate. I do not want to learn to enjoy Daniel as a woman would, although I'm not sure that would happen, and I also find the idea of being loved by a male unsettling. I hope that it does not disturb you that I will not participate in the preliminaries, Samantha."
"No, it doesn't disturb me at all. And now that you have brought that up, I realize that I should have thought of it myself. I can understand both reasons completely. They both make sense, and I don't blame you for not wanting to do that. Don't worry about it, please."
"Lantash, I want to be held in your arms again. I-I'm glad that we're seriously working toward this exchange. I am going to miss you, though. I never thought I would say that about having a symbiote, but, I really will miss you. Not as much as I want to be in your arms again, though."
"I know, Samantha, I, too, am beginning to wish for you, and it has only been a few days. We will not allow that to blind us to the truth, however. If the situation with Daniel will not work for some reason, I will not blend with him just to sate my longing for you. The two of you must be compatible. Then we shall see."
"I do not foresee a problem, though, my love. I believe the two of you will be very compatible, and then I will look forward to blending with him."
"I think Daniel and I will be compatible, too. But, Lantash you have to be well first. I won't lose you. I'll lose this baby before I'll lose you. Do you understand?"
"Yes, my Samantha, I understand."
"All right, just so you do. Go ahead so you can rest and heal because you are more important to me than anything else. Please, remember that."
"I will, my love. I am glad you understand why I shall stay dormant. Above all other reasons, I just know that it would only make me want that which I cannot have. Mating, er, making-love with you is something I do not believe I will ever lose the desire to do with you, my beloved."
"Why did you change what you called it, Lantash? Is there a reason?"
There was no answer for a moment, and then he said softly, "I do not wish to upset you, so if I do, I will take control, so that you will not break down here in front of these people."
"The reason I changed it is that after last weekend, Martouf told me that never again should we ever call the act of mating by any name other than that of the Tau'ri word for it, because the Tau'ri word making-love or love-making was the most descriptively true name he had ever heard it called."
"He said that when we were with you we were not simply mating, we were, in fact, making love to you and with you, just as you were making love to us and with us. Never again would he ever think of it in any other way. The three of us made-love all weekend, you made-love to us all week-end, and all weekend we made-love to you."
"It was the most beautiful mating either of us had ever experienced; therefore, he felt it should be called by the more beautiful, descriptive name. I agreed completely, beloved, for neither of us had ever experienced anything remotely as lovely and profoundly soul-deep as that which we shared with you."
"It was special to him, that word, because that is what you called it, and his request that it always be called by that name by us is a promise I wish to keep. Please Samantha, do not cry. Not now. Please." He held control until she was all right and then released her.
As she forced her mind to think of other things and Lantash calmed her, she once again found herself in command of both her body and her emotions.
She made no comment on what he had told her. None was needed. He had felt her response, the surge of love and longing that had swept her. "I will be alright now, Lantash. You said you needed to become dormant and rest. Really, I will be fine, and if not I can always awaken you."
"As for becoming dormant now, it is better that I do not keep talking to you and distracting you with this many people around, which I am doing. It is one thing when it is only Daniel and those few who know. However, this is a larger group of people, and we have been conversing for quite sometime. I have been monitoring, and no one has been talking to you, but Cassie is beginning to now."
"I understand. I love you, Lantash, please remember that."
Lantash caressed her softly. "Believe me, beloved, that is something which I will never forget. Goodnight."
"Goodnight."
Sam returned to the world around her to hear Cassie saying, "Aunt Sam, we have all of Uncle Daniel's drawers emptied. Which side do you want your clothes in? The right or the left?"
Sam stared at her and then looked at Daniel as he entered from the kitchen. He shrugged. "Well which is it going to be, Sam? Are you going to let me have the right side permanently now, are you going to insist on it, or are we going to keep switching?" Nice tidy way of letting me know that you normally sleep on the right side of the bed Daniel, but that you'll switch for me.
"I think I'll let you have it, Daniel. Actually, I usually sleep on the left, I just wanted to see if you'd give up the right side, or not," Sam said slowly, as she traced a pattern on the arm of the chair she was in.
Daniel's eye's narrowed. "That's sneaky, Sam. It's not nice to be sneaky with the man who makes breakfast."
Sam cocked her head and looked at him. "That's true, so I'll try to do better. I'll definitely take the left side Cassie, and be sure that Uncle Daniel gets at least two drawers. I'm sure he needs that many."
"Two? Sam, I have two dressers full of clothes in there."
Sam smiled. "Not anymore."
"Jack, tomorrow we're going back to Sam's and getting her dresser. Maybe two of them. That's a big bedroom and there's room for it. One can go in one of the guest bedrooms. I can't have all my clothes on the floor, or in boxes," he wailed, as only Daniel could.
Then he shook his head and laughed with the rest of the room full of people. Sam looked a little pale and her eyes were red, but all in all, it could be passed off as remnants of yesterday's trauma. Since everyone here knew the story, except Paul Davis and Cassie, it would no doubt be all right. He walked over to Sam and grasped her hand.
"Come on, I think we should oversee the placement of our apparel into the proper drawers, or we may never find anything again. Especially with you taking all of my drawer space." He kissed her on the nose as they walked up the stairs.
Paul Davis turned to Janet Fraiser, "You know, I never gave it any thought before, but now that I see them together like this, they are absolutely perfect for one another. They're both so smart they understand each other, and they are comfortable together. I think it's great that they're getting together."
Janet smiled at him. "So do we. We all want nothing but the best for them. They both deserve it." They could hear Daniel laughing with Cassie in the bedroom, as the drawers opened and closed. Then he was groaning and insisting that they were taking all of his space away from him and leaving him with nothing.
They heard Cassie telling him to stop moaning and whining, or go away, and knew that Sam was no doubt methodically continuing to work and getting things finished in spite of them.
If Paul saw the worried look Janet cast upwards toward the bedroom, he said nothing. He watched her go into the kitchen, the frown still creasing her forehead. Not long afterward, he followed her through, and found his way to the bathroom off the kitchen. He leaned back against the door.
Janet Fraiser was concerned about something. She had been so deep in thought she hadn't noticed him walk by her and into the bathroom. He wondered if it had anything to do with the top secret document that had arrived for the President. He supposed it might since it was from the SGC.
He pushed off from where he was leaning against the door to do what he had come in here to do, which was not to speculate wildly about the team members out there.
He was right. Janet was concerned. She had seen the shadows and the tell-tale signs of a hard crying jag. Not just a few tears, but an out and out full blown jag. The fact that Colonel O'Neill and Teal'c arrived without them had been a hint that something had happened, but they hadn't said anything, just started unpacking, beginning to work, obviously what they were supposed to do.
They had all set to then, knowing that they didn't know when Daniel and Sam would be there. She had been surprised to see them so soon, actually. Sam had seemed in good spirits. Well, she was pretending to be in good spirits. And, that was almost as good. The longer she could act as if she was, the more real the acting would become.
She hadn't realized she was staring at the wall, until she heard Daniel behind her, "Penny for your thoughts?"
"I doubt they'd be worth a penny, Daniel."
"Oh, I don't know, they looked to be pretty deep to me. Worried about Sam?"
She turned to face him. "Yes. Yes, I am. I was just wondering what had happened earlier that you two were so late getting here, and she came in with all the signs of a woman who had been crying her heart out."
Paul Davis, drying his hands in the bathroom, suddenly realized he was caught in there and wished he was anywhere but. This had the sounds of what was going to be a very private conversation, and he couldn't just walk out there now. Then again, maybe if he went right now, he could. However, Daniel's next words stopped him cold.
"Yeah, well, we were ready to leave for here, and she grabbed the pillows off her bed. Evidently, they still had Martouf's scent on them, and she lost it. I found her on the bedroom floor, crying like her heart was broken in two. But then," Daniel said sadly, "that's probably because it is."
"I shouldn't have left her to walk around the house alone, Janet, not when I knew they spent the entire weekend there making love just a few days ago."
"The house is full of his ghosts. She told me she was seeing him everywhere. You know as well as I do that, since it was the first time they were there, they had to have made love in every room, on every piece of furniture, hell, probably up against some of the walls. He had to be everywhere she looked, and I left her alone in there."
"Daniel…"
"Janet, it's okay. I know that Sam cares about me, and in time, we'll be all right. Right now. Well, right now, she's grieving. Five days ago he was alive, laughing, vibrant, and in her arms. Now, hell, he's only been dead since yesterday, and she is being forced to make some life-changing decisions. Lantash, the baby, me, what to do."
"It's all falling in on her, and I think she's holding it together pretty damn good. In a way, I'm kind of glad that Lantash can't transfer to me just yet. I think that right now she really, really needs him there, inside her. Later—well, later—she's going to want him to hold her and love her and once he blends with me, he'll be able to do that. And we all know that it will be safer for the baby, if he transfers to me."
"I just thank whatever deities are out there that we can hide the fact that this child is Martouf's and pass it off as mine. Lantash told us tonight that it won't look enough like Martouf to give its parentage away."
Daniel laughed, but it was a little choking sound. "The funny thing is that I wanted it to look like him, for her sake. I hadn't even thought of the consequences of that, but she already had and was worrying about it."
"Only five days pregnant, and already she can't be happy about it because she has to worry about the damn System Lords, the N.I.D., and god knows who else finding out who the father really is."
"And to top it off she can't even take the time she needs to mourn for him, because she has to fall in love with me, and become my mate in the eyes of this world and the galaxy to throw dust in everyone's eyes."
"She has to pretend the scene in the gate room was just a remnant of something else that meant little or nothing and put up with the rumors about it. She's a hell of a strong woman, Janet. I feel honored that she is accepting me, and I'll do everything I can to see to it that she is protected."
"And the rest of us will do everything we can to see that both of you are protected, Dr. Jackson. I'm sorry. I was in the bathroom and before I realized what was happening, you were talking. I was trapped and had heard too much already by the time I realized that what I was hearing was basically a state secret."
"I have to assume the President knows since there was a report that was for his eyes only from the SGC. One that, as far as I know, he destroyed, by the way. That's, ah, not generally done, but he did, so I assumed it was a personal information document, not a state document. I can only believe it pertained to this situation."
"You can rest assured that I will do my part in spreading the news that Major Carter and Dr. Jackson are very much in love, living together, and expected to make it permanent. I will also be sure to spread the pool dates around so that it will appear to be a long standing arrangement."
"I do need to know how to answer questions about the scene in the gate room once it starts to make the rounds. Fortunately, very few people in D.C. know about the Stargate program, but of those who do, eventually it will make the rounds. My being here so shortly afterwards puts me in a position to have what would be considered "reliable" information."
"It's also believed that I am more "informed" than most on what happens here. Any rumors I spread will be given slightly more weight than some others might, so I will see to it that it is known to have come from me. It's the least I can do. However, if there are already rumors about Major Carter, Martouf, and Lantash, what do I need to say about them?"
"I would suggest a form of the truth, Paul."
"Sam. I'm sorry; I didn't hear you come in." Paul Davis looked uncomfortable at being caught discussing her.
Sam walked to Daniel, and as he held out his arm, she slid under it. She looked thoughtful for a moment. "Since you know so much, you should know the rest. I do care for Daniel very much, and I expect those emotions to grow, rather than lessen."
"As for the rumors about Lantash and Martouf, the truth is the best thing to tell. Because of Jolinar, I have always loved them. True, I developed feelings of my own for them, but that can be conveniently left out. So—because of those feelings—I am mourning them. I did love them. It did affect me deeply."
"Daniel was with me and he helped me, knowing how much it would hurt me. Knowing that I, as me, Sam Carter loved him, he knew that I, as Sam Carter/Jolinar, would be mourning Martouf/Lantash. Very, deeply."
"That's why he suggested that we take the time off now, to move me, instead of waiting for another month, as we had originally planned, when we thought we would be able to get away easier. We simply took work home with us instead of waiting."
"Will that do, Paul?"
"I think it will more than suffice, Sam. I'd like to offer you my condolences as well. I didn't know them, but, I am sorry."
"Thank you. You'll get to meet Lantash after he blends with Daniel."
"Won't that mean that Daniel will live to be a lot older than the rest of us?"
"Yes, so I'll probably blend as well after we have our children. I'll want to spend our entire lives together, not grow old without him growing old with me."
Daniel looked at her with shock on his face. "You will? I mean, you really will?"
"Yes, I have no fear of it now, after having Lantash. It's a wonderful bond, Daniel. I didn't understand before. I didn't have Jolinar long enough without fighting her, to understand."
"I'm already beginning to realize how much I'm going to miss him when he leaves to blend with you. It's going to be a very emotional parting, in many ways. But even without all of the other circumstances, I would simply miss having him there. I'm looking forward to having my own symbiote."
"Seriously, Sam? I mean, you really will miss just having him in there? Isn't the lack of privacy driving you crazy?" Janet asked, fascinated.
"No, it's not like that. It's nothing like we've all assumed it was. Nothing at all. It's—special. At least, that's what I've seen so far from Lantash's memories, and I believe this is the norm, not an aberration. I mean, I have all his knowledge and he has mine. I can see his past lives, all of his hosts, his mates, all of it really."
She paused for a moment, obviously assimilating her thoughts, and then continued, saying, "That's not completely accurate. It isn't just what I can see and feel from his memories. I can feel it within myself. My own emotions accept that this is a very intimate and special bond. I'll never be nervous of it again. I can hardly wait to have my own now that I've experienced it."
"The Tok'Ra are very open with their hosts and hide almost nothing. In return, the host generally doesn't either. Both have some memories, or thoughts, that are just too personal to share. But, it's not like he's there monitoring every thought I have or anything. I really can't explain it other than to say it is not what we think it is, and I am going to miss it very much. I'm already dreading losing him."
Daniel appeared stunned by Sam's comments. Maybe having a permanent boarder wouldn't be as bad as he thought. If Sam wanted one of her own now, it couldn't be that bad.
It put a whole new light on the entire situation of the blending. Maybe he and Lantash would become as close as he insisted they would. Perhaps he should believe him. Now, he was beginning to get impatient to see what it was like for himself. Sam smiled at him and he smiled back. It would all work out.
"I think everyone's getting hungry and everything's pretty much finished. Why don't we turn the oven up a little, and heat the pizzas a little more while we get the plates and stuff? We can argue over the movie while we eat." Sam suggested.
That suggestion found favor and before long the group was seated comfortably in the living room, pizza everywhere, beer for everyone but Sam and Cassie, and a movie that the guys had to admit was not as bad as they thought it would be.
Sam quietly cleared up some dishes and took them into the kitchen. After putting them into the dishwasher, she found she couldn't face the other room again yet, and made her way outside to the deck. She was surprised to find Paul Davis there before her.
"Paul? Is something wrong?" Sam questioned him softly.
He jumped slightly and turned to her. "No. No, actually it isn't. I was just enjoying the night. It's hard to see sometimes in D.C. The night that is. Not just because of the light from the capital, but because we lose sight of things. The government doesn't always see what it should."
Sam looked sad for a moment. "No, it doesn't. But you can't really blame them sometimes. They have to balance the good of all against the good of one. Sometimes, one loses, unless there is a broader picture where the good of one, also means the good of all."
Paul watched her as the moonlight played over her face. Even in that pale light you could see the pain in her eyes, and if you looked closely you could see the emotional toll that was being taken from her. "I meant what I said earlier, Sam. I am sorry. I didn't know about you and them. It wasn't any of my business, anyway, but usually gossip, you know." He shrugged, obviously embarrassed about the gossip.
"Paul," Sam waved his comments aside, "You didn't hear anything because there was nothing to hear. Martouf, Lantash, and I, "She sighed deeply. "It's complicated. I don't know how much made it into the official report. The symbiote that died for me. Jolinar. She was their mate. For almost a hundred of our years. I have her feelings for them, a hundred years of love."
"I have a hundred years of memories of loving them in my mind. A hundred years of being loved by them. We had one weekend together physically that were truly mine and theirs. One weekend out of one hundred years of memories."
"So, you see, I have this very old love for them within me, and then, I have this very young new love that is all mine, that had nothing to do with Jolinar, in me, as well. So, I am mourning him twice I guess you'd say. It's very confusing."
"At times like this, when I look at the stars and a moon, I have flashbacks of being with them and making love to them, when it couldn't possibly have been me, but I feel it, as if it was me. I can feel their touch on my skin and the taste of them on my lips."
"The symbiote does that. It gives you tactile memories. As a consequence, it's more than just a memory in your mind, it's as if it's a memory in your body and you live it again. It's a blessing and a curse."
"I'll always know exactly how he tasted, his scent, the feel of his lips on mine. I can feel him caress me, but he isn't there and, really, for me, was never there, unless I bring up a memory of last weekend. And then, then the smell and taste and feeling are all mine. So old love, new love, it's all the same, I loved them for a hundred years even though I wasn't even born yet," She murmured lowly, softly, her voice shaky.
"Then there's Daniel. I love Daniel, too. Lantash says I always have, but more importantly—I always will. It would never have developed into anything stronger if Martouf had lived, but now that he hasn't, Lantash is forcing me to admit the feelings have always been there buried in my subconscious."
"He's right, too. They have always been there. But there's always been something between us keeping us from acknowledging it. Until now."
They both stood quietly for a moment before Sam turned back to him. "I don't think that's why you're out here, though. What's on your mind?"
He laughed quietly. "Pretty obvious, huh?" Sam raised an eyebrow, and he shrugged. "Okay, so I am. I realized a little while ago that the last three times I've been to the SGC, I could have done what I did by having files sent to me. I didn't have to come here to get them."
"Now, that leads me to believe that there is some other reason that I am making the effort to come here. Now that I've realized that, I'm honest enough with myself to want to know why I'm here. So, I was standing out here trying to figure it out."
"I see. And did you answer yourself?"
"I'm not sure. But I think I want to transfer to the SGC from D.C."
"Okay. Why? I mean that's good as far as it goes, but why do you want to move to the SGC? Do you want to join a team and work off-world? Because the General doesn't have an attaché."
"No, I know. That's part of the problem. I'm not really SGC material. But I know I want to be here. So, I guess I'm going to have to go into training to make an SG team."
"Not necessarily. You have to pass certain physical fitness tests anyway. It wouldn't hurt you to go for the next couple of levels if you really want to be at the SGC. Start now."
"But, I could use you in my group. You're good with the computer and the programs. I know it's a big change, but maybe you need a change. You could fit into the control room staff very easily, and it wouldn't hurt the general to have an attaché, actually. Let me see what I can do, Paul."
"Why, Sam? Why would you do this?"
"Because I think I know the real reason you want to transfer to the SGC. And I think it might work out because your reason wouldn't be averse to it. I've always liked you, too. We have worked together on and off for a long time."
Paul looked confused. "I don't understand."
"All right. Why do you want to move to Colorado Springs and work at the SGC?"
I want a change. I think I'd find it interesting. I might like the idea of going off world."
"You forgot that you like brown eyes and auburn hair."
"Well, yes, there is that, too. And she's very petite. I like…" Paul's head snapped up and his mouth dropped open. "What did I just say?"
Daniel sauntered up behind them and put his arm around Sam, "I think that Sam just did a nice bit of subtle digging and managed to get you to find the real reason you want to transfer to the SGC. Her name is Janet, she's single, very nice, a good doctor, and a lot of fun. Go for it, Paul, we'll help you out. She deserves to be happy."
Paul Davis looked from Sam to Daniel, before saying, "You may be right. I was thinking earlier that I was going to ask you about her, Daniel. So, you really think she's the reason I want to transfer to the SGC? Hmm…I was wondering the same thing earlier, but didn't quite see it."
"Well, I knew I needed something to push me into it and wondered if she might be it, and that's when I thought I should ask a little more about her. Maybe that's done it. And Sam, I, ah, started on the working out several months ago."
"Good for you. Go for it, Paul. Life's to short to wait on it because it won't wait for you. Trust me, I know." Sam leaned forward and kissed him lightly on the cheek. "Come on. It's time to find out how the movie ends, and see if the Colonel stayed awake or not."
"All right. I'm right behind you. I wonder if she'd drive me back to the base tonight?"
"You could always ask her. She has Cassie with her, but that shouldn't matter. In fact, I'll get the General to forget about you. And Teal'c is staying at Jack's. Who knows, if you luck out maybe you'll end up in her guest room, instead of on base. I'll make sure that Jack and Teal'c make a hasty retreat, too. You two, loiter for a bit in here in the kitchen, okay?"
"Sure, Daniel," Sam laughed at him and pulled him in for a quick kiss. "Go get 'em, tiger." She grinned at him and he flicked her a haughty look as he turned and left the room.
"I always forget how much fun Dr. Jackson, er, Daniel, can be. It always surprises me when he suddenly goes into action, arranges stuff, and it goes off without a hitch. He just gets so bubbly that everyone listens to him."
"Yeah," Sam said, a soft, gentle look on her face. "He's pretty special is my Daniel. He's not appreciated enough for everything he's done, though. He should have been given the highest honors a civilian could be given a long time ago. He should have been given military honors for all of the military offensives he's been in and the number of times he's saved our world."
"It's wrong that they don't honor him somehow." She sighed, and her eyes were sad. "So many heroes and no one to mourn them, but us."
"Sam. Sam, someday, it will be known, and each and every man and woman that have given their life to save this planet, their names will be known. And Daniel's name will be known most of all. He will be given the honor he should be given, and so will you and Colonel O'Neill and Teal'c. Every one of you. And with Daniel taking Lantash, he may even live to see it. And so may you."
Sam smiled at him. "I hadn't thought about that, but you could be right. Thank you, Paul. I'd still like to see him honored now though, even if it is just by the president and the chiefs of staff. He deserves so much. He's given more than any of us. As you say, though, maybe someday."
"Someday. Count on it."
Sam smiled at him, nodding. "I will."
Daniel sauntered casually into the room. "Movies over and Jack and Teal'c will meet us at your house tomorrow, so we can go get your dressers. I don't know why we didn't think of them earlier. Anyway, they just left. Oh and the General left a little bit ago, too. Cassie is in the bathroom, and Janet is getting ready to go. Cassie is in the one upstairs."
Paul took his cue and stepped into the one off the kitchen as Sam and Daniel went into the living room to wait for Cassie and Paul. They wondered who would be first. Paul made it. They turned toward him as he entered the room.
"It's really a beautiful night out. I got caught up and couldn't make myself come in. Where is everybody? Did I miss the end of the movie?"
"Yes, I'm afraid so. No doubt you'll run right out to rent it so you can see it."
"No actually, I was thinking more along the lines of having someone tell me how it ended." He frowned. "Ah, Sam, where's the General?"
"He left a little bit ago, didn't he, Daniel?"
"Yes, and so did Jack and Teal'c. Why?"
"I, ah, rode with the General. I don't have a car here." He sounded so helpless, Sam almost laughed aloud. She couldn't have sounded that bereft. "I wonder why the General left without me?" Daniel's phone rang.
"Want to bet that's the General?"
"Hello? Oh, hello, General Hammond. Major Davis? Yes, sir. Yes. No. Well, yes, sir. No, sir that won't be necessary, we'll take care of it. Of course, General, don't worry about it, it's not a problem. Well, no, but Dr. Fraiser is still here. I'm sure she wouldn't mind. I can ask her now if you'd like."
"Tell the General I'll take care of Major Davis, Daniel."
"Thanks, Janet."
"Yes, she did, General. Yes, sir. Good night."
"He's not used to bringing anyone. He forgot. Thanks, Janet, I didn't want to have the General come back."
"Listen, I can call a taxi. There's no need for anyone to go out of their way for me. It's not like it's unheard of for me to get a taxi."
"It's not a problem, I can just…"
"No, really, I won't make you drive all the way back to the base. Not at this time of night, and then have to drive back to your home."
"Really, there's no problem, we can simply…"
Cassie came hopping down the stairs, "Are you staying at our house? Cool, you can have the guest room. Come on, mom, lets go, so Aunt Sam and Uncle Daniel can be alone, remember?" She jerked her head toward the door.
Daniel and Sam smiled as the young girl herded her bewildered parent and her intended victim to their car. When they pulled out of the drive they didn't turn in the direction of the base. Sam and Daniel burst out laughing. Cassie one. Paul one. And although she didn't realize it, Janet was the winner.
"I like Paul. He's a really nice guy. I think he'd treat her really well, don't you Daniel?"
Daniel heard the anxiety in Sam's voice and went to her. He sat down in the recliner they had brought from her house and settled her on his lap. "What's wrong, Sam?"
She shook her head. "Nothing really. I just hope we didn't make a mistake interfering in their lives."
"Sam if it's meant to be, it will be, and if it isn't, it wouldn't matter what we did, it would never happen. It's all right. You can't take responsibility for everyone's happiness or unhappiness, Sam. What brought this on, anyway?"
"I talked to Lantash earlier."
"Yes? And?"
"He's never been in a female, or well, he was in one for a few days once, but she didn't have a lover. He finds the idea of being made love to by a male disturbing. I would have trapped him in my body, Daniel, with my love for him, if you hadn't stepped in and offered to take him and me. He wouldn't have told me."
"I guess it made me wonder if we are ever right to make decisions for other people. He suggested taking a male host, you know, and I refused. I wouldn't even consider it, until he suggested you. That wasn't fair to him. I know it's not the same thing as Janet and Paul, but it just made me think about stuff that's all."
"Sam, I knew about Lantash. And I also knew that he would never voluntarily give you up to a man that did not love and care for you. Period. End of discussion. He loves you too much to do that. If his choice was to give up his male body, or be with you, he'd give up his body in a heartbeat, don't ever doubt that. Not ever."
Sam nodded. Daniel was right. She was analyzing things way too much. She needed to start feeling her way through this instead of trying to think her way through it. She couldn't think her way through it. But her heart could and would guide her. It was time to follow it.
Sam pushed herself off his lap and stood by the chair looking down at him. He was a hell of a man; there was no doubt about that. Smart, kind, funny and sexy. Yup, hot as hot could get. Sex appeal and Daniel Jackson. Oh, yeah, you could say both in the same sentence and use them interchangeably. She could follow her heart, and her libido, too.
She smiled, held out her hand to him, and helped him from the chair, "Let's go to bed, Daniel."
TBC