A/N: Alive and updating. I really wnated this chapter to be flowing and perfect but instead it came out a little rushed- not too bad in the end I hope. I was rereading some of the previous chapters to remember some of the plotlines and whatnot and I realized that my author notes were atrocious. Made me want to smack myself. But it was like 11pm on a schoolnight when I posted them so yeah. that is my excuse. But finals are finally over (yes!) and I have a four-day weekend cause of the deficit in California (kinda confused on what emotion that brings out of me). Anyway, here is chapter 22 and I hope you enjoy it. Review with flames or compliments. Shower me in them, or torch me in them- at least I like hot temperatures :)
Disclaimer: I own nothing but I am going on a crusade to steal Merlin so that I can make a season 6 and I don't have to look at my computer in disgust every Saturday and notice the empty space where new episodes used to pop up.
Previously on Events Unexpected…
"Don't," Korra interrupted. She could see it in Kaji's eyes that she was not going to back off and that her mind was set. "If you have any love for me, any at all, you will stop this."
"I-" Kaji stammered. Korra looked at her, hating that it was taking the girl so long to answer. "I do love you Korra, more than I've loved anyone before. I need you to know that!"
"Save it," Korra bit out.
The captain had been instructed to wait for her before returning to the Earth Kingdom so, with no thought as to why his passenger looked like someone had torn her open and made her watch as her blood and organs spilled out, he turned on the giant engines and began the voyage back. Korra found a quiet little nook where she let go of all of her anguish, her cries quieted by the piece of her jacket that she held firmly between her teeth.
"Get me a ship to Republic City. I want it ready for departure by tomorrow evening at the latest. Also, make sure that any engagements I have for the next two weeks are either taken care of by my advisors or pushed back until my return," Kaji ordered.
Korra's eyes moved up to take in the dark amber eyes and tussled hair that pointed up to the ceiling in a spiky, yet flowy hairdo. As her brain was finally able to comprehend what was going on, only one word was able to leave her mouth.
"Mako?"
Korra was dumbfounded. That was the only word that was able to fully encompass how her mind turned from raging mess of harried thoughts into complete nothingness in less time than it took for her to take a breath. It couldn't be him; there was just no possible way, for all of the coincidences or spirit-induced fates in the universe, there was no way for him to be there at that moment. To be standing with the same old red scarf hanging precariously around his muscular neck and wide shoulders and his small smile that looked equal parts confident and shy in a vortex of oxymoron, as though he had never left. As though he had always been there and Korra was the one who had gone off to some strange, far off place and now she was returned, broken and shallow. The same feelings as when he had vanished from her world, only now it had been another who caused the emptiness and pain. In just that one word, that one movement of his lips when he said her name, it felt like she was remade. And yet, far from vanquishing the loss and hurt that had been left in the wake of Kaji's lack of candor, his presence served only as a distraction. A lovely distraction nonetheless and Korra soon found herself wrapped around him like some kind of human pretzel, mumbling 'hello's and 'how are you's with such ferocity that the words came out jumbled and unintelligible.
Mako's arms came to slip around her back and pull her tighter into him. The sensation of his strong biceps against her back and the warmth given off by his skin, even through the bulky grey jacket, was like coming home. It was so familiar and Korra ached for its stability, even with the instability that he had caused less than a year past. He gave a throaty chuckle against her head, burrowed safely into the crook of his neck where she could comfortably lose herself to the musky smell of his body, and said, "Good to see you too Korra."
Korra was at a loss for anything to reply. It was frustrating how she tried to form coherent thoughts and all her mind could think about was that his scarf had gotten a bit scratchier than it had been last time and his hair was quite soft underneath her fingernails. It had been kept about the same, but travelling must have allowed for some hairs to go further down his neck than he usually let them. Such small differences, but the profound effect was that he was indeed Mako and he was indeed standing and holding her up so that her toes were the only thing hitting the dusty ground beneath them.
"You're back," Korra mumbled into his clothing. Her cheeks turned red only a second later; inwardly she was chastising herself for not having thought of something beyond the obvious to say.
"I'm back," Mako assured, stroking her spine with one hand while still keeping her aloft with the other. Korra had to admit that she had grown unused to being caressed by someone with such a larger height disparity. She quickly put a stop to where those observations were leading her and focused on pushing herself off of the firebending boy in order to get a better look at him.
"Not that I'm not ecstatic, because I am," she began, "but why-"
"Long story," Mako interrupted, his eyes growing darker for a slight second before returning to their light bronze and giving her a wider smile. "Maybe for some other time. I want to hear about what's been going on here. Bolin just refused to talk to me until I came to see you and then you were gone so…"
Korra blushed, hoping that he hadn't been waiting too long. The trip to the Fire Nation had taken a week to go and a week to come back, leaving quite the gap. In retrospect, Korra wished she had never gone on that stupid errand. In retrospect, she wished she had never gone there in the first place. The anger that had been boiling just below the surface began to spill out of its tightly held container. Mako turned, confused, to look at Tenzin for a reason why his friend had just gone deathly silent and looked like she was ready to kick a puppy in fury. The only response he got was a shake of the head and a nod in Korra's direction. The subliminal message had been understood: if he wanted to know what was going on, he would have to ask Korra about it. That would be left for later though. It was still early in the day, not yet noon, and Mako was planning to make full use of the hours ahead to revisit some of his favorite places in Republic City.
"Earth to Korra," he joking waved a hand over her face, snapping her out of her trance only to get another bashful look from the girl. "So, I was wondering if you wanted to go into the city with me; reminisce about stuff and maybe even find a descent place to eat?"
Korra could have laughed at the way Mako raised his eyebrows to emphasize how great his proposed plan was. She settled for a smile and a nod. Her stomach twisted when she remembered that she had just come back from a rather important visit and owed Tenzin a debriefing- at least on the parts not concerning her relationship with a certain powerful political figure. The bemused chuckle he gave her stopped her midsentence as she was about to launch into a very concise retelling of 'yes, they were soon going to be in a state of war between three nations.'
"Go Korra," he prompted. "You can tell me about it later."
"Thanks Tenzin," Korra affectionately gave him a quick hug before following Mako to the ferry that would take them onto the mainland.
Mako wasn't kidding about the strolling and 'reminiscing about stuff' part of his plan for the day. They had been mulling around the city with no obvious destination in mind for at least three hours before stopping by one of the tea shops that was open into the street. The cheery disposition of the owner was also welcome and they settled onto two empty stools on the left corner of the booth. The rays beating down on them as the hour reached noon were deflected by a thin sheet of green fabric that had been stretched over the guests, creating a cool and relaxing atmosphere. The scents of the different teas being prepared and the dried plants used in them were overpowering enough to cause a few of the more allergic patrons to break out into minor sneezing fits. Korra was resting her chin on her hands, her elbows propped on the smooth wooden board that served as a sort of bar for those who preferred to enjoy their tea there. Her eyes couldn't help but travel to look over at the boy who was wearing a leisurely smile and chatting animatedly with the tea maker. His voice was deeper than Korra remembered it, but then again it had been a long time and her memory might have been a little off too. She just wished that she knew how long Mako intended to stay and what his motives were. Where Asami was, she couldn't lie to herself as the paranoia of losing him again set into her stomach. She was worried, that much was obvious, but Mako seemed keen on avoiding the subject altogether. Even during their earlier walk, he had insisted on conversing only about her. He had asked about the remaining rebels in the Equalist ranks and what she had been doing lately. Korra had given vague answers, recalling her trip to the Fire Nation but skimping on any details of what she had done there. She had told him about the team falling apart, but defensively blamed it on a bad season- certainly not mentioning how close to the verge of emotional depression she had come to at his leave. The rest was just quiet enjoyment of each other's presence. Try as she might, Korra could not ignore that, despite the presence of the man who had consumed all of her attention not even a year before, she still kept looking for a pair of golden eyes whenever she looked up to peer into his bronze ones. She knew it was unfair to not tell him, but Kaji- she shuddered even thinking the name- was not a subject she felt comfortable broaching. How could she tell him without revealing everything else; her weakness and the fragile state she had been in once he left? And the last thing she wanted was to compel him into some kind of guilt feeling just to keep him around for even a few minutes longer. Which brought her right back to her initial dilemma: how long was he going to stay?
Deciding that wracking her brain in mindless circles of anxiety was unhealthy and would surely spoil the day, Korra erected a mental shield and turned to gain Mako's attention, "So, how long are you staying in Republic City?"
Mako turned to her and gave her a warm smile before opening his mouth to reply. He was cut short by their order being handed over the small counter. The cups were warm but the pottery was a poor conductor and Korra was not singed when she rested her hands on the sides of the ceramic. Mako set his down before saying, "I was actually thinking of staying for quite a while. If nothing pulls me away, probably forever."
Korra's heart made a small, violent leap into her throat and she was, once again, at a loss for what to say. She was ecstatic, that was certain, but was it really worth such a feeling. She loved that he was planning on remaining in Republic City indefinitely, yet there was always that chance that something might take him away from her again. The forgotten, or buried, feelings of that first infatuation and eventual juvenile love she had felt for him returned full force; so did the knowledge of how painful it had been when it had all been ripped apart, the feelings only intensified by her last visit to the Fire Nation and Kaji. Korra was simply too much of a jumble of different, repelling forces that she could no longer make heads or tails out of anything at that point.
"So…" she began, her voice fading away until all she could do was look at her tea and focus on the swirling of the liquid. It seemed so much nicer and far more serene than her mind. The young Avatar found herself wishing that she could make her brain into tea; then she wouldn't have to make sense of all of the stupid emotions and problems, she could just let it swim around lazily and warm her head.
"So," Mako returned, his smile never leaving his face. One of his hands came up to grasp Korra's with a gentle, warm pressure. She flinched and pulled it away, marking the contrast between his rough sunburned fingers and the delicate pale ones of another firebender who seemed to haunt her every waking moment. Mako, if he had been offended or dismayed, showed no signs of it, returning to his tea and giving Korra the space she needed. The last thing he wanted was to push her away.
Bolin had joined the merry entourage before long; Mako had somehow known where to find the earthbender as though through some kind of brotherly telepathy unknown to Korra. The trio had been wandering around for quite some time before stopping by at a secluded little park on the opposite side of a shopping district. The people seemed to be more interested in buzzing in and out of the multitude of shops offering all assortments of things to notice the small, grassy clearing on the other side. Thankfully, it afforded the perfect climate for a small picnic. Bolin had, happily, offered to buy a few food items from the complex of stores and had disappeared leaving Korra and Mako to sit on the grass and wait in silence. Korra wanted to say something, anything, only to come up blank again. She felt so frustrated that she began to chuck little rocks into the bubbling brook that ran down the length of the park. Mako, not noticing the strained expression on his friend's face, decided to join her and make a game out of it. Soon, the two were busy trying to best each other in skipping stones and attempting to get them all the way over to the other side. Mako soon had to capitulate as Korra's waterbending gave her the unfair advantage. She was glad that she hadn't forgotten how to laugh, letting out a triumphant giggle when her firebending friend flopped onto the grass and gave a disgruntled huff.
"You owe me half of whatever Bolin decided to buy you," Korra prodded him in the stomach, her finger sinking only far enough into the fabric to brush against his hard muscle underneath.
"Whatever cheater. You don't get anything unless you win through skill," Mako retorted, scrunching his face into one of fake anger. Korra couldn't hold in her amusement.
"Hey, waterbending is a skill. How is it my fault that you happen to not have it and I do? And anyway, doesn't it hurt your pride to go back on your word oh noble and honorable firebender?" the teasing ensued for another few minutes before a food-laden Bolin crossed over to them.
"Glad you ladies are enjoying yourselves," he winked at Korra and dropped all of the parcels onto his brother's chest. Mako growled and moved to strew the unwanted packages off of his body before sitting up and grabbing the nearest one. The entire meal seemed to be comprised of a few sandwiches and some drinks. Korra got a fruity one while Bolin and Mako were both gifted with green tea. The atmosphere was so well known and comfortable that Korra felt her shoulders relaxing and the tension breaking. Her eyes slid shut as she allowed herself to beam and laugh at Bolin's atrocious jokes and just become apart from the world outside of their own little bubble.
And then it was broken. Bolin looked up at Korra and said in a winded voice- having just gotten over the effects of his latest horrible pun, "So, where did you disappear to for the past two weeks huh? I heard Fire Nation so I'm guessing it was to see our friend. Get up to anything?"
Korra's eyes widened slightly and her mouth dropped from its enthusiastic grin into a thin line. She quickly looked down, seeking a place to hide within the food held in her hands, but there was hardly enough space to hold her and the ground seemed convinced that it would not swallow her up.
"I-" she started only to have her words catch in her throat. Bolin knew about her liaisons with Kaji and would probably do something drastic if she revealed what she knew about the young monarch's involvement with the onset of war. That and she would have to explain the complex turn of events to Mako; something she had no idea how he would react to.
"Bolin, leave her alone," Mako's gentle tone was her saving grace. "Sometimes you really have to stop sticking your nose into things that don't concern you."
Bolin bristled under the harsh ending remark. The good-natured boy prided himself in not getting mad quickly and without provocation, but his older brother's words elicited a foreign response in him; somewhere in between indignation and pettiness he snapped back, "What, like where you've been for all of these months and why you didn't even bother to write or contact us. And why you suddenly come crawling back with no Asami in sight and no explanation as to what happened?"
"Exactly," Mako erupted. His eyes were narrowed and his lips were drawn into a deep frown. Korra placed a hand over his wrist to keep him from doing anything he would regret. It was heeded only enough to keep him from crashing into his brother and giving him a good beating. Mako instead settled for a growled, "I don't even know why you have to be such a pest."
"You know what!?" Bolin had had enough. He was grateful that his idiot brother had decided to come home, that was undeniable, but the pigheaded firebender was not forgiven for all of the time he had vanished into thin air. Korra might have been hiding it well, but Bolin remember what it had done to her, what it had done to him. And now Mako wanted to play it off as though nothing had changed and he had only been away on a weekend getaway or something of the kind? That was bullshit. And that was exactly what he called it. "This is bullshit Mako. You can't just expect me to accept all of this blank time where I have no idea what went on. I was worried about you asshole, and the least you could do would be to tell me that you are okay and nothing bad happened to you!"
"I'm okay and nothing bad happened to me," Mako deadpanned.
Bolin let out an exasperated grunt before getting up from his seat on the meadow. "Fine," he said before turning and stalking away. "Come find me when you're ready to apologize and open yourself up a bit. If you aren't, don't bother coming after me."
The figure of the seething earthbender was soon lost amongst the crowds of passerby's and automobiles chugging along the streets. Korra was somewhat disheartened that the entire argument had been started over her even though she knew that there were underlying factors at play as well, so she settled by moving closer to Mako and crumpling the empty wrapped left from her meal into her hands and promptly lighting it on fire.
"He shouldn't have pried before you were ready," she whispered, her shoulder touching his arm. Mako could only nod and look in the direction where his brother had disappeared.
"Still," Korra continued, feeling the boy beside her stiffen as though preparing for a physical blow. "When you are ready, you are going to have to tell us something."
"I want to," Mako said. "I just-"
He went silent, unsure of his reasoning as to why he was avoiding the subject. It wasn't a particularly horrible one; rather something in the back of his mind just was not mentally fortified for it yet. He was afraid, irrational as it was, of saying it aloud because of the implications that came with that. And he could never admit it to Korra; not when he had chosen Asami over her and, cruelly, fate had come back to haunt him. There was no way to say it, no way to confess how wrong he had been in pushing away the girl now looking at him with those large blue eyes brimming with understanding and compassion. Not yet; not until he was ready; if he could ever be ready.
"You know you can trust me," Korra brought her hand to rest on his shoulder. Mako had all but forgotten how much her soothing presence calmed his hyperactive mind. "I am not going to judge you."
Later on he would not have been able to justify or quantify why he did what he did. The moment had been right; maybe it was her words and how perfect they had been; maybe it had been his soul, caught on fire by the despair of loss and the hope of finding something familiar. It was not love, or perhaps it had been. What was love anyway? Some sort of indefinable, intangible strand of cosmic energy or hormonal imbalance that slipped through ones fingers like sand granules in the wind. In the end it didn't matter. In the end Mako leaned in and drew the dark-skinned girl to him. In the end his lips parted and pressed against her, first gentle and questioning, then harder and burning with all of the intensity of his desire and need. In the end his doubt was suppressed by a false certainty that pushed him to hold onto Korra for dear life and press into her until he felt everything bad melt away. And she kissed him back, with that same hunger. Both felt it, that it had not been like the first time where Korra had been infatuated and Mako had been preoccupied. In that moment, they were seeking solace from their own pain within one another; only neither knew the other's scars; only that, for a moment, the searing within their chests was drowned and the emptiness was covered up by a thin sheet that just barely held them above the void. And for that moment, it was enough.
After a time they pulled away from each other. Korra licked her lips and tasted the saltiness of Mako's, so different from the sweetness of the 'other' firebender's'. It was a stronger taste, domineering and pronounced. Alien and yet so familiar that it lulled her into a sort of catatonic rapture. She moved to rest her shoulder against Mako's and drew him in for another soft kiss. She wanted more time feeling him. She wanted to assess the emotions that came with his touch. There was no electricity, no bursts of light or claps of thunder, but there was warmth and catharsis and cleansing. It was what she needed.
That time they stayed apart once their lips came away. Mako looked into Korra and she into him. They both could feel the gap, the 'something' that was missing, yet it was so faint that one only had to ignore it and eventually it would be plausible to figure it as a figment of the imagination.
"Hey, let's get out of here," Mako beckoned, getting to his feet and offering Korra a hand. She took it with only the hint of a blush, tilting her head down to avoid any eye contact.
Kaji was off the ship the second she felt the ramp steady itself against the edge of the wharf. She had no time to lose as it was officially dusk and Korra's ship- through careful calculation and a worrisome amount of effort on her part- had landed in approximation that morning. The firebender had put on a simplistic garb to hide her identity and draw less attention. The pants were loose but clung to her thighs with a soft beige coloration that matched the soft white trench coat that kept the cold air out. The winters in Republic City only got snow in the mid-January to early March time period so it was mostly a chill wind and minor frost clinging in the air that would cause her discomfort. However the weather was the last thing on her mind as she raced down the streets in her knee-length ember boots. The first place to check for her Avatar would have been Air Temple Island but she would have to find the ferry before being able to get to it. Using the ship that had brought her there would alert too many eyes, even if the overbearing Water Tribe witch had returned to the spirit-forsaken wastelands of the southern arctic continent. Spinning around a corner, Kaji found herself in sight of the last boat of the day. She would have to hurry, but with luck she would be able to be on it and transported to the island just as the sun's final rays left the surface of that corner of the world.
The Fire Lord found herself at a loss. She had disappeared within the crowd of evening tourists come to see the last remnant of the airbenders and their ancient culture and had been able to slip into the tower that housed the monks and their gifted compatriot. Her memory had brought her directly to Korra's bedroom, which in itself was all according to her plans. Speech and groveling all set up and ready to go, Kaji had burst into the small quarters only to be faced with an impossibility that made her stomach clench and her heart drop. The room was empty. The bed was made and had evidently not been touched for some time yet. The closet was closed; Kaji perused it to find Korra's usual getup missing which led to the assumption that Korra was either out or was in some other part of the tower. The firebender cursed under her breath. There was no way that she would be able to check the entire expanse of the building; she hadn't the time not to mention the obvious fear of being caught. She had no explanation for her presence and to confess was to give up everything- her plots, her involvement in the upcoming battle, her forbidden affections. Still, Korra was more important. Kaji searched through the expansive archive of her brain, looking for the places Korra usually visited whenever she was within the tower.
Quite a long time later- mostly due to the incessant need to keep hidden and the obnoxiously large number of monks that happened to walk in all of the passages that Kaji had to go through- the Fire Lord found herself outside of the building, slumped against an old tree trunk with her head between her knees. A growl ripped its way out of her lips; her fists moved from their clenched positions by the side of her head to hit the ground by her hips. At that point there was no use in staying. Korra had been nowhere to be found and the stars had long since come out to sparkle over the landscape. The city shined in its own celestial glow, seemingly so far away when it was only separated by a thin strip of water. Hanging her head, and finally noticing how damn exhausted all of the travelling and sneaking had made her, Kaji stood up from her forlorn position and trudged down to the seashore. The ferries had long since stopped their transits so she was more or less stuck… unless. Almost as though by magic, a small fisherman's boat came sliding into the sand with the evening surf. Kaji had to raise an eyebrow at the obscurity and sheer lack of sense that accompanied the vessel. Not one to look a gift ostrich-horse in the mouth, she shrugged and took a seat on the rough wooden bench. Two oars were conveniently located beneath the seat and, much to Kaji's increasing good fortune; the tides were calm without the presence of a breeze so setting off was not hindered by any waves. After a time- and the assurance that there were no holes, assassins, or any other form of problem- Kaji relaxed her strokes and settled into a relaxed position, allowing the tides to push her into the dockyards of the metropolis. She would have to find herself some kind of hotel or something to stay at for the duration of the evening as there was surely no one aboard the large Fire Nation ship that would take her home in the morning. Not to mention that she was not ready to give up on her initiative quite yet. A new day meant a new chance to find her elusive Avatar. Korra would have to return to the Air Temple at some point and, if Kaji was able to wake early enough, she could probably intercept the girl before Korra left again. Giving herself a nod of approval, Kaji took up the oars again and slid into an empty space next to the wooden beams that flanked the walkway onto the stone alley that greeted her.
The boat secured, Kaji had left with high hopes for the morning to come. Walking with a purpose, she didn't even notice the boy running toward her with the velocity of a komodo-rhino until he was right on top of her. As it was, the movement caught the corner of her eye and she was able to pull a swift maneuver of stepping to the forty-five and catching him in the chest in a sort of clothesline with her arm. The impact of his back to the street caused her to wince when she realized who exactly had been coming at her.
"Hello again Bolin," she offered a hand to the gasping earthbender. He took it with a slightly uncomfortable smile, groaning when he had to bend to get to his feet. "How have you been since we last saw each other?"
After their kiss in the park, Korra and Mako had kept a good distance from one another. The streets had soon gotten devoid of people as the afternoon closed into darkness with the sun's absence. Only a few drunkards and loners had been going about the walkways and the shadier crowd of people started making its appearance. As such, both had silently agreed to retire for the night. Korra had noticed, with a slight twinge of something akin to happiness, but not quite, that the last ferry had long since departed and returned from Air Temple Island. Mako, always a gentleman, had cordially offered her a place in the little apartment he and Bolin shared. Neither of them was looking forward to the awkward reunion with the earthbender. It wasn't that Mako was mad anymore and Korra definitely understood where Bolin was coming from, but the tension was not something to be looking forward to. Still, the small attic of the Pro-Bending arena was far better than the rapidly cooling exterior.
Mako couldn't help but feel relief as he set his eyes on the sparse expanse. The large windows looked out in all directions, giving the perfect view of the beauty of the lights in the city. The reflection of the large building on the murky waters was also like some kind of golden mural, moving ever so slightly with the billions of water molecules bumping together within the sheets of black liquid. The ladders leading to his and Bolin's beds were still in their same positions and, if one were to decide to move them, one would be able to see the small squares of polished wood where the dust never accumulated. The orange sofa where he had lounged and mused over long forgotten worries with the outlook of the city beside him was a little more worn, but otherwise just as he remembered. Yes, that was home. Despite the turbulences and grievances of the years, some things never really seemed to change. Perhaps it was the air that hung around with the comfort of familiarity draped over every object in a blanket of peace. Well, either way, Mako was home and he was thoroughly ready to immerse himself in its sensation.
"You hungry?" he asked Korra. Her eyes had been locked on him since the moment he set foot into the small living space. He wanted more than anything to reassure her that he was okay, but that would feel too much like lying and Mako was done with that.
"Not really," Korra mumbled. She had hoped that being with the firebender for the day would have set her mind into another topic other than Kaji; alas it seemed that even entering the building resurfaced the long passed day when they had snuck in and fought with the Raging Komodo-Rhinos. It had been that night that Bolin had become the only one, other than themselves, to know about Korra relationship with the Fire National. Former relationship, Korra bit out in the back of her mind. Even then, she was at war with herself over the question of whether she had overreacted. Kaji's words had hurt, but had it been enough? She had said that she loved Korra; she had also turned around and supported something that would hurt Korra in the end as well. It was all so damn frustrating and complicated and Korra felt foolish and selfish whilst also trying to convince herself that she had done the right thing. If only she knew whether to fight for the firebender or to let her be. Kaji was as much of an enigma as ever and Korra wasn't sure if any of her actions would pull the girl closer or push her away. And had she mentioned that it was damn frustrating and complicated?
So wrapped up in her own dilemmas, Korra didn't even notice the hand Mako had placed on her waist or the way he was slowly turning her to face him. The lights in the room were dull, the electricity having been lowered to conserve energy and not disturb any of the neighboring buildings- not that there were any but laws applied to everyone even giant domes buildings which were closed to the public at such a time. His lips against hers took her by surprise. At first she instinctively placed her hands against his chest as what was meant to be a push, but her brain registered that she was in no peril and her grip relaxed. Some part of her was shouting that it was wrong to go through with what was happening. She was too raw and it was unfair to Mako. The rest of her yelled for that section of her to just shut up and think of consequences later; it would have been easy to ignore that rational entity begging her to stop and think. But she was the Avatar and rarely was she allowed to take the easy choice in anything.
"Stop," Korra gasped into Mako's imploring mouth. "I- I shouldn't do this."
And why not? she wondered, her body still pressed into the firebending boy's arms. Mako opened his mouth, and then closed it as nothing came out. Korra's eyes flickered to his topaz and she was astounded to find hidden moisture in them. The tears were small, not even a mist really, yet she had never seen something like that in him before.
"You're right," Mako choked out. His arms moved to release her only to be stopped as Korra grabbed his biceps and pressed herself to his chest, hearing the beating of his heart like that of a steady drum. "I was hurt by Asami and using you as a crutch isn't fair to you or me; especially not to you Korra."
Korra looked back up in surprise. She hadn't expected him to open up so soon. Maybe a few days, a week, but never this spontaneously. Still, she had a feeling that such matters were better said and heard whilst sitting on a comfortable cushion where there was no danger of their legs giving out under the pressure of the secrets confessed. Taking his warm, rough hands, she led Mako to the orange couch and plopped down before pulling him next to her. His eyes were full of fear and gratitude; quite the inexplicable combination though one Korra was familiar with. The emotions had been mirrored by her own eyes when Kaji had found her in that lonely garden all those months ago. That was all anyone ever really needed, someone to listen to them and not judge. So listen she would, and hope that it would help.
"I don't even know what happened. I thought things were going just fine," Mako began. His head leaned back to find the sofa, eyes running along the ceiling and the planks of the two walkways above them. Anywhere really, as long as he was able to avoid looking into his companion's face. He knew he would sound pathetic to Korra; bemoaning Asami when she had been the one he had chosen over the Avatar. Still, he wanted to say it, to unload all the bitterness.
"We had been travelling around the Earth Kingdom, staying in the major cities mostly. Asami was trying to get an apprenticeship with some major inventor or another and I just took the odd jobs to keep us with a roof over our heads. Six weeks ago we had just arrived at Omashu- Asami had gotten a notice from a man saying that he was interested in hiring. He was some big shot in the railroad industry or whatever and wanted help in designing sturdier frames in the tracks, I'm not really quite sure. She went on and on about it but it was way beyond me."
They both chuckled knowing how the former-heiress loved to immerse herself in her odd contraptions. Mako's tone returned to its somber lull after the moment had passed, continuing and trying to keep in control of the overflowing doubt resurfacing in him.
"About three weeks passed and she kept staying late at the office and we barely saw each other. When we did, she was always so snippy and we fought a lot. It was just… I don't even know how I didn't see it coming then. One night she came back early; I was planning to cook something special and then take her out for a walk around the city to make up for all of the spats we had gotten into. When I asked her where she wanted to go, she burst into tears and started apologizing to me. I didn't know what to do… I froze…"
Mako couldn't go on; his teeth ground together to keep from gasping in anguish. He should have done something, anything, just not what he had done. Asami was gone because he let her slip out of his fingers. He should have held her; begged her not to go; melted the door into the wall to keep her with him. But he had done nothing; he had stood like some sort of statue as the girl he had uprooted his life for disappeared into the night and vanished. He had done nothing. Mako hated that sensation, the blankness that overtook him and kept his central nervous system from reaching his peripheral nervous system. His muscles hung limp, his skeleton had felt like it was made of cartilage, as though even the slightest shift would send him to the floor. Electricity from his hand broke through the veil of the past and Mako realized that Korra had given his hands a squeeze. He almost laughed at the thought that she was the one who was helping him. If anything, Korra was the one who should have turned him away; yet there she was, holding onto him as a tether against the storm.
"She left," he finished. It was not an explanation at all but it expressed everything so much more profoundly than any other words he knew. Asami left. Asami was gone. Asami abandoned him. Korra hated the snide part of her that wanted to smile at the irony of it all. Mako was her friend, her first love, and he was not some kind of cruel joke.
"I want to tell you that it'll be okay," Korra whispered. Her voice was audible to Mako only because her head was so close to his, also resting on the back of the couch. Taking a breath she finished, "but that would be a lie. It hurts like a bitch and it really doesn't go away."
Mako chuckled. The phrase had been vulgar and concise but it pretty much summed it up. That was another feature of Korra he appreciated: she was straight and honest. Sugarcoating things was not really in her repertoire. "That's definitely not what I wanted to hear… it was what I needed to though."
"So, you decided to come back and that's it?" Korra wrapped up the end of his misfortunes.
"That's it," Mako affirmed. His chest felt lighter and he couldn't help but feel the urge to express his thanks to the girl next to him. Turning to give her a wide smile he was interrupted when her lips crashed into his. Korra's momentum as she flung herself at him caused them to flop over onto the couch. The cushions were soft under Mako's head and gave way easily for Korra's hands as they buried themselves into his hair. A moan escaped his lips without consent. The kiss was so alien to the ones he had experienced; definitely different than the first one he had shared with Korra. It was harder, more feral, and held a confidence that had never been there before.
There is a very short, not very well described lemon. Just skip over to the next bold in order to skip it. To those who will read, I am not very good at this sort of thing and am sorry for skimping the details.
Korra's body wrapped around Mako's so that she could deepen the kiss, opening her mouth to allow him access. She hated what Asami had done to him; hated that she had just thrown him away when he had left Korra broken for the nonbender. It was as though her heartbreak had been trivialized with that act and Korra wanted revenge. Revenge on everything and everyone. And Mako's hands running over her back just felt so good. She felt his arousal against her as she grinded her body along his. She didn't know when she had pulled his jacket and shirt off but they were gone and she was lying over a beautiful expanse of skin. Mako was tanned from his travels, though his genetic pallor still kept him fairly light. Korra sat up to examine him from a distance, her hips digging into his abdomen with a sweet pressure that set Mako's breath rate askew. He hadn't expected Korra to be that knowledgeable when it came to such intimacy. As her tongue ran over his body and her hands caressed his muscles, he couldn't help but wonder at how wrong he had been.
Not one to be outdone, Mako quickly removed Korra's top and flipped them over. The couch was small and not shaped very conveniently to accommodate that sort of thing, but they were able to keep on it with a bit of adjusting. Mako's mouth went down to cup Korra's collarbone as he undid her bra and let it drop to the ground. As he moved lower he was encouraged by the sighs and moans of pleasure that the girl underneath him was giving. His lips wrapped around her perked areola before moving his hand to caress the other one. Korra gasped as her sensitive areas ignited. Mako's touches continued to get lower until he was at her waistline. Korra almost expected the foreplay that Kaji always did, heating her up and making her wet with her lips before plunging her fingers in and bringing Korra over the edge. Mako's movements weren't even comparable. It was not that she didn't enjoy it. In fact it was pleasant. As he removed his clothing and the rest of hers and entered into her they both gave a cry, their voices rising in unison. Korra breathed in Mako's perspiration as he thrust into her, filling her completely, before pulling out and repeating the process. Still, it was nothing like the passionate, scorching nights in Kaji's embrace which set every iota of her body, mind, and spirit into an ecstasy-induced oblivion. Shut it Korra, she growled, hiding it in another moan as Mako's thrusts increased and she clenched into him. Now was not the time for those thoughts. She felt her walls throb each time Mako's length moved into her, preparing for her climax that was swiftly approaching. Korra allowed herself to flood all of the worries and regrets out of her and lose herself in the raw sexual motions. She started to convulse and knew that it would be soon. Mako's mantra of saying her name let her know that he was close too. And that was when the door opened.
Okay all good. Continue on my dear readers!
Kaji couldn't help but think that there really was someone in the Spirit World looking after her. If she had a choice, she knew who she was hoping it would be, but it didn't matter. After running into Bolin and making up a quick story about how she was visiting the city on business and had set off to find Korra- mentioning her miserable failure at it- she had been informed that Bolin's older brother had come back and he and Korra had been spending the day together last he saw them. Kaji felt a twitch in her smile at the mention of Korra gallivanting about with someone other than her, but then she reminded herself that Mako had been Korra's friend as well. In all probability she was just overreacting and would laugh about it later. Bolin offered her a place to stay for the evening and, since she had taken a limited amount of funds with her for the journey, she took his offer. He optimistically added that, since Korra had not been in the Air Temple, she might have decided to go over to their place as well.
"She was acting kind of strange when she got back from seeing you," Bolin chatted as they walked along the well lit streets. He knew that they would be alright if they were confronted by any pickpockets or other criminals, but it was best to avoid those areas altogether.
Kaji's face fell as she remembered how hurt Korra had been when she ran out of the throne room. "It's complicated," she answered. Bolin was perceptive enough to drop the subject. It seemed like everyone around him had closed themselves off and it was starting to concern him. Kaji was someone he knew would figure it out on her own though so he was more comfortable in letting her puzzle it out for herself.
They had come up to the walkway leading up to the Pro-Bending arena and Kaji turned to give him a quizzical look. He smiled and ran a hand through the hair on the back of his head before explaining, "We live up in the building's attic. Toza let us stay up there since we were young as long as we were able to pay a little bit of rent and run errands for him. It became more permanent after we started participating in the tournaments."
Kaji didn't really know a proper response and settled for nodding and continuing along the concrete bordered by the still dark waters of the bay. They entered through a side door- something that made Kaji wonder why they had allowed her to drag them through the trouble of climbing the roof to get in that one time- and moved up several flights of stairs before Bolin stopped and placed a hand on the handle of a small door.
"It isn't much but, ladies and gentlemen," he started in a hushed voice made to mock an official announcer before a grand ball. "Fire Lord Kaji of the Fire Nation!"
His hand twisted the knob and the door fell away to reveal a small expanse. Windows surrounded most of the room, containing a small kitchen area and a table for meals and just sitting. Two ladders led up to makeshift walks leading to a hidden upper story. Those details, however, completely escaped the mortified Fire National. Kaji's eyes could only pick up the small orange couch tucked to the right side of the far end of the room; or rather, what was currently on the couch. Bolin had had his back to everything until he noticed that Kaji wasn't moving and her eyes were the size of saucers. His ears picked up the muffled moans and some mumbled words coming from behind him and, by the expression of the girl standing to his side, he had a good idea what was going on. It had only been a few seconds that they just stood as though time had stopped. Bolin was unsure as to whether he wanted to turn around, afraid of what he would find but also knowing that he had to do something. Kaji was still having a difficult time remembering how breathing worked, her gaze stuck on the scene playing out before her as though staring might snap her out of the nightmare she was in- because surely it was a nightmare as no other explanation was presentable.
Korra threw her head back as the onset of her climax hit her. She had kept her eyes open, not really for any particular reason in mind, when she saw that they were no longer alone. In fact, the last person she could have imagined to be standing in the miniscule doorway just so happened to be there. Kaji's hand was propped on the frame of the opening to the outside corridor, her right foot somewhat in front of her left in preparation of entering. Her hair was in a ponytail and her clothing was so casual that Korra would not have recognized her if it hadn't been for her eyes and the defining features of her face. As it was, the world resumed its orbit and time began to move again.
Kaji felt sick to her stomach and backed away from the room as though she had been burned. Bolin tried to reach for her but she slapped his hand away and tore down the corridor to where the stairs were. Korra screamed her name and slid out from under Mako- who had the most confounded expression on his face. She quickly put on her clothes and set out after the retreating form of the Fire Lord. Bolin, safe with the knowledge that he was not about to be faced with a naked Korra, turned to look at his brother. Mako was panting and sweaty, making no move to clothe himself as he was still trying to figure out what the hell had just happened. Bolin wasn't sure whether it was his place to tell him just how bad this was; deciding that it was Korra's life and it should be her lips he heard it from, Bolin crossed the small room and threw his brother's underwear to him. Mako caught the drawers and slipped them on.
"What?" he began only to be cut off by Bolin's shaking head.
Kaji felt a burning in her lungs. It wasn't the burn of fire, more like acid eating away at her heart and bronchi, travelling through her blood until her cells screamed in their final death throws. Of course she wasn't really dying, but it felt like it. The stairs blurred as her eyes brimmed with tears and the image of seeing Korra and someone who most definitely wasn't her in bed replayed itself in an endless reel behind her retina. Her foot snagged on one of the steps and she came crashing against a wall. Her shoulder took the brunt of the impact but nothing was majorly injured so she pushed herself off and continued down until there were no more steps to take. Rushing through a door, she found herself in the same room that Bolin had entered after they had come in through the side door. Suddenly Kaji was overwhelmed by a suffocating sense of claustrophobia. She had to get outside. Every fiber in her cried for a burst of cold air.
Before she could get to the opposite end of the room where the portal to her freedom lay, Kaji was pushed into a wall by a panting and very flustered Avatar. Korra panted with the exertion of chasing Kaji and her time with Mako before that. When she finally found that she had enough breath to form a coherent sentence, she realized that she had no words to say. All she could do was look into Kaji's wide eyes and grimace at the sheer terror that was reflected in their molten gold depths. Kaji's wrists were pinned to the wall above her head, Korra's body leaning into them so that Kaji would not be able to wrestle free; not that the firebender was making any indication of wanting to move. In fact, Kaji looked like she was about to faint then and there. Both girls stood in silence for what seemed to be milliseconds and eons at the same time, the paradoxes swirling around them in a vortex of vertigo.
"Korra?" Kaji's voice was hollow. She didn't know what to say; hell, she couldn't even remember the words necessary to say anything at all. All that was left in her memory was the name of the girl she loved. "Korra."
Korra's pulse raced with each enunciation of her name. Kaji's voice was so small, uncertain and questioning; asking her whether she was really there or some sort of horrible phantasm conjured to send Kaji into insanity. Korra's hands shook against Kaji's wrists, not willing to let go but wanting nothing more than to pull the firebender into an embrace. She looked so fragile then, prone against the wall like some kind of martyr. And all Korra could think to do was press her lips into the girl's, reassure her that she was there and, as improbable as it surely was, compel her to forgive Korra's transgressions.
The kiss seemed to have the opposite effect to her hopes. Kaji tasted the heavy saltiness and musk on Korra's mouth and felt her mind snap into place once more. Her eyes narrowed at the audacity of the girl to do such a thing when, not even ten minutes before, she was committing an act of infidelity. Had they been broken up with Korra's flight from the Capital? Kaji's mind screamed at her that it was no time to be debating the details. Anger bubbled up from the pit of her stomach, the center of her firebending and her chi. Her hands started to heat up innately, reading her body's signals for attack. The epinephrine levels in her blood soared and her heart pumped it into her brain at a ramming speed. It was Korra's turn to look afraid as she witnessed the change in demeanor. Her hands were getting uncomfortable against the increase temperature of Kaji's wrists and palms. She sincerely hoped that they would not combust in blue fire as she was in no position to waterbend.
"I'm sorry," she said. A small section at the back of Kaji's head told her that it really was her fault that the entire mess had occurred but it was quickly silenced by the rest of her. She was not one to appreciate betrayal and she had trusted Korra with something she had never offered to anyone before. And now all she got were two small words; as if they could make everything alright.
Kaji wanted to retort; wanted to push Korra away and storm out; wanted to evaporate the entire ocean to release the fury building within her, pressing against her skin in waves of pure power. Instead, all she could do was lock her jaw and stare at Korra, unsure as to what she was going to do. She could not deny that a part of her wanted to lash out at the girl, but she loved her and would not hurt her physically. Mentally was already out the window it seemed.
Silence enveloped them again and Kaji lost her patience. Steeling herself, she snapped, "If that is all I will be on my way."
Korra opened her mouth, desperately trying to come up with something to make the other girl stay. She searched every recess of her mind for something to say that would take back the events of the previous few minutes. She wanted to prove to Kaji that it was a mistake. She had been hurt and found a kindred spirit in Mako; he had been the first person she had held affections for; he wasn't meant to replace Kaji, it had never been about that. But it had, hadn't it? She couldn't stop the tears streaming down her cheeks even if it was pathetic and cruel.
"Stop it!" Kaji's shout shook Korra, making her cringe at the intensity of the gaze directed at her. "You don't get to cry now. You don't get to make me feel bad. You don't get to do that. Don't cry."
The last words were said in a hush and Kaji ran a hand along Korra's cheek to wipe away the small droplets of moisture. The softness of the touch contrasted the violent feelings within her, wanting to tear apart everything in sight. But it was Korra and Korra had always been untouchable. Kaji wondered at the circumstances that had led them to this. She had forgotten her mission; discarded the purpose given to her by Princess Azula. In the process of her indecision she had come to wound both herself and Korra. She should have never stepped out of the path that had been set for her. It was too late now to think of such things, that she knew. It was time for the choice and Kaji knew what it would have to be. Azula had warned her of the temptations of the heart, so much stronger than those of the flesh and Kaji should have heeded them. She would continue to follow Azula, but it was true that she was tearing Korra apart when doing it. And despite everything, Kaji really did care for her in her own twisted way. So she hardened her heart to the stone shell it had once been and resolved to leave the chapter of her life taken up by the Avatar behind.
"Let go of me Korra," she commanded. Her voice was smooth, back to the nonchalance she had become so familiar with in the past yet had never resorted to when speaking to the younger girl.
"No," Korra shook her head violently.
Kaji grimaced, her façade a forgotten shield already too chipped and battered to offer any sort of protection anymore. "You have to let go. It is obvious that we can only hurt each other if this goes on any longer. I cannot confess my love for you to anyone and thus you can never truly be mine. It was only confirmed tonight. If you are honest to yourself you would see that what you want this to be is impossible."
"No," Korra's hands finally released Kaji's wrists in order to bury themselves into the trench coat she was wearing. Kaji hesitated but figured that the small hug she gave the sobbing girl would not necessarily be a bad thing. She immediately regretted it as her hands reflexively clung to Korra's back. Kaji closed her eyes and opened her senses to the Avatar in her arms, knowing it might very well be the last time she held her like this. No, it had to be the last time. There would be no turning around at that point. Not anymore.
"I'm sorry for everything," Kaji whispered. And then, remembering something she said on that far off night when it had all begun, she repeated in a hushed voice, one used when expressing the most guarded secret, "You are deserving of the most love in this world. If you forget everything else, don't forget that."
Korra gasped at the words. Her legs gave out as Kaji pushed past her and exited from the small door leading to the cold outside where she continued to find a hotel where she could spend the night even though there was very little of it left at that point. Within the small room, Korra was found by a worried Mako and a hesitant Bolin. The earthbender boy knew of Korra's relationship with Kaji and hadn't wanted to interrupt anything. Seeing Korra kneeling on the floor with dry tracts of tears along her face made him regret his trepidation and appreciate his brother's initiative. Mako gathered Korra in his arms and proceeded to carry her up into the apartment again. She made no sound or movement even as he laid her in his bed and blew out the light before returning to the landing and moving to sit on a rickety old chair, not willing to move to the old couch after what had just transpired- even if he still wasn't quite sure exactly what that was.
In an alcove in the darkest reaches of the Spirit World, a large, pale face grinned wickedly and dozens of sharpened insect legs rubbed together in anticipation for the unfolding of fate and the prizes that awaited it at the end of the road. The Noh mask was then covered in shadow and Koh returned to his slumber with a satisfaction and excitement rarely felt by the spirit.
P.S: And done. Hopefully I will be updating sooner than last time... this time? Whatever. I will write as soon as I can, reviews spur the creative juices! Bye for now!
P.S.S: To all my beautiful reviewers to whom I cannot send a PM, you are amazing and I hope that I will keep hearing from you as well. I love each and every one of you. To the people who review and I can PM, well, I try to make each response personal and if I lag behind it is due to school. I love you all! Forever! Or unless you are uncomfortable, then I will leave you alone.