Chapter 24

Then:

Dean doesn't look at him as he slings his duffel bag over his shoulder. He walks to the door and, waiting for Sam to see, drops the amulet into the trash can before leaving the motel room. I don't want to look at Sam's face, but I get a glimpse of it, anyway, as he follows Dean. He looks wounded, as if he's been stabbed in the back, and the lump in my throat grows more painful.

I wait for Sam to leave the motel room before going to the trash can and pulling out the amulet, tucking it into my pocket. I'll return it to them eventually.

"Home?" Gabriel suggests quietly and I nod.

"Home." I should be relieved when we land in the living room of Gabriel's house, Cola barking happily and jumping up to greet me, but there's a hollow emptiness in my chest that just won't go away.

Not to mention I have a few questions for Gabriel, now that I've seen Heaven for the first time.

Now:

It's not until the next day that I get my opportunity to ask questions. Gabriel leaves me to my own devices all of the previous night, but the next afternoon, he corners me in the kitchen.

"Hey, you wanna go for a walk?" he asks brightly. I raise an eyebrow at him. "We'll take Cola, too." With a shrug, I get up and follow him through the living room. "C'mon, mutt!" Cola barks and leaps off the couch, allowing Gabriel to clip a leash onto him before we go outside.

We're in a large park covered in a few inches of snow - after all, it's still halfway through February - and fat lazy snowflakes drift down slowly from the gray sky. Cola jumps up, attempting to catch the snowflakes in his mouth excitedly, and Gabriel rolls his eyes as he unclips the leash again.

"Okay, fine, go nuts." Cola barks and races off to roll around and play in the snow.

"Don't you ever worry that he'll run away?" I point out as I pull on the gloves in my pockets before my fingers freeze.

"Nah, Cola always comes back. He's a smart dog." Gabriel watches the tiny Jack Russell terrier roll in the snow for a few moments before saying quietly, not looking at me, "You scare the hell out of me sometimes."

"Sorry," I say on reflex.

He smiles wryly. "Most people would ask why."

"Oh." I flush. "Well, why?"

"I guess it's 'cause you remind me of how things used to be back home." He still doesn't look at me. "I've had a long time to hide my wings, and now you've pulled them out again. And with what Famine said...I might've gone too far trying to prove that I do care about you."

"Sorry," I apologize again, this time understanding what he means and feeling guilty for causing that fight.

"Nah, don't be. I went overboard and I know it." He wraps an arm around my shoulders, smiling down at me at last. "Now I've gotta ask. What was your Heaven like?"

I can't help but grin. "Well, you held out on asking longer than I thought you would, well done." He grins back at me. "I think it was a memory from before."

"Yeah?" He raises an eyebrow.

"We were in the infirmary. All of us. Your wing was broken."

He grimaces. "T-Rex?"

"Yeah. Speaking of which, what the hell were you thinking?" I demand.

"It was funny at the time," he admits with a sheepish grin before adding, "That was your first day working with Raphael. We were all so proud of you that day."

I can't help the rush of heat to my cheeks as I ask, "But if I don't remember it, then why was it my best memory?"

"Well, that's partially my fault. You can't just wipe someone's slate clean, that would take all kinds of delicate work and risk of brain damage. Your memories are just sort of locked up in the back of your mind where you can't reach, but they're still there."

"So that's why I chose that one over, say, my high school graduation," I point out.

"Something like that," Gabriel agrees wryly, "Although I'm flattered that my broken wing is happier for you than graduating high school."

"Oh, shut up, it's not like that." I punch his shoulder lightly, even though it feels like I'm hitting a brick wall. "I think it was because we were all together."

"Mm." Gabriel avoids looking at me now, focusing on scuffing the snow with the toe of his shoe. "Lucifer and Michael were really tearing at each other's throats at the time. The day you found your healing talent was the first time in a long while they didn't have a go at each other."

"You think that's why I chose that memory?" That's kind of sad, now that I know the real reason my subconscious had made that my best memory.

"Probably. Y'know, I would've thought you'd have chosen something from your human life." He grins at me, though I can see the apprehension there.

I shake my head, looping my arm through his. "If I picked that memory, it's 'cause no human memory of mine could compare." That earns a more genuine smile from him. "After the infirmary, I went through a forest. But isn't it supposed to be, like, some kind of tunnel or road?"

"The Axis Mundi," Gabriel confirms, "And it differs, depending on the person. I guess to Sam and Dean, it showed as a road, because that's where they spent their lives. The forest, on the other hand..." He frowns thoughtfully before it seems to click. "I remember. You used to take Castiel down those trails all the time when he was a fledgling. He liked playing by a little stream in the woods."

"I jumped over it when I was running from Zachariah," I recall, and the idea of me raising Castiel is enough to put a smile on my face. It disappears just as quickly. "Where did Cas go?"

"Who knows?" Gabriel grimaces. "I can't find him now, I warded him with enough sigils that no one can sense him."

"He really believed in God," I say quietly, nudging a pile of snow with my foot.

"Yeah, I know. He must be heartbroken." Cola returns to us, shaking snow from his fur, and I pick up the little dog. He nuzzles my neck with his cold nose, curling up against my chest to soak up my body heat.

"We should look for him," I point out as I rub Cola's ears gently, "What if he gets hurt when his Grace is this weak?"

Gabriel stares at me for a moment before chuckling. "Now you're starting to sound like your old self again." He nods. "Okay. We'll try tracking Castiel down."

"Thanks." I smile and Cola takes the opportunity to lick my nose. I make a face at the dog. "Ugh, Cola, that's gross." Gabriel laughs as he leads us home again.

We try every tracking spell Gabriel knows, but the sigils he had imprinted into Castiel are strong, not to mention whatever wards Castiel himself had implanted are still holding steady.

Luckily, by the third day of trying, Sam calls and eases my worry.

"Cas is here."

"What? Where?" I demand.

"Blue Earth, Minnesota. It's a mess over here," he admits, "There's this false prophet and the whole town's gone nuts and-"

"Whoa, whoa, slow down," I say hurriedly, putting the phone on speaker and placing it on the table. "Okay, repeat that?"

"This girl, Leah Gideon, claims to be some kind of prophet of the Lord."

"No way," Gabriel says, "Leah Gideon isn't a prophet name."

"Yeah, that's what Cas said. Apparently, she's the Whore of Babylon, from Revelation."

"Well, if she's bearing false prophecy, her goal's to send as many innocent little humans to hell as possible, which also means she has to be stopped." I'm totally lost, but Gabriel grasps my shoulder and tells the phone, "We're on our way." I barely have time to grab my phone before we're suddenly in a dark motel room. Dean is leaning against the kitchenette counter while Sam sits on the couch with Castiel.

"Cas!" I shove my phone into my pocket and hug the angel tightly. He smells like cheap beer and I wrinkle my nose. "Are you drunk?"

"...maybe." He sounds sullen, his words still slurring slightly. "I drank a liquor store."

"Just one?" Gabriel snorts. "Lightweight."

I smack Castiel upside the head, noting that it doesn't hurt my hand, but he winces. He really is turning human. "You had me worried sick, you jerk. We've been searching for you for days." I hug him again and this time, he returns the embrace awkwardly.

"I apologize," he murmurs, "I didn't mean to concern you."

"Idiot." I press a kiss to the side of his head.

"All right, so now that the teary reunion's out of the way, how do we go Pimp of Babylon all over this bitch?" Dean asks and I don't let go of Castiel as I settle on the couch between him and Sam.

"Stake from a cypress tree in Babylon," Gabriel answers easily.

"Yeah, because we totally have one of those lying around," Sam deadpans.

"Right." Gabriel snaps his fingers and a twisted wooden stake clatters onto the coffee table in front of us.

"Great. Let's ventilate her," Dean says, reaching for the stake.

"It's not that easy," Castiel interrupts.

"Of course not, when is it ever?" I mutter.

"The Whore can only be killed by a true servant of Heaven. Not you, Dean, and certainly none of us." Castiel gestures vaguely at himself, me, and Gabriel. "Sam, of course, is an abomination." Sam looks briefly hurt.

"I don't think you were mean enough, Cas," I say sarcastically as I pat Sam's shoulder comfortingly.

"What about a pastor?" Sam suggests, "Leah Gideon's father would work."

"He'd count," Gabriel agrees thoughtfully, "So long as he didn't turn against Heaven at any point during his life."

"Yeah, I doubt that, the guy's a stickler for whatever his fake daughter's preaching," Dean says, shaking his head, "So what, we nab him, give him the stake, and tell him to go nuts?"

"I'll be in touch." Castiel stands from his seat and is gone in the next second. Gabriel huffs and disappears after him.

"Thanks for leaving me behind, guys," I tell the ceiling dully.

"Join the club," Sam says wryly, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.

"At least you're less dickish than your brothers are," Dean adds and it's then that I notice just how worn out he looks, as if the weight of the world is finally pressing in on him.

"Much appreciated," I tell him wryly. I'd have to talk to him later. Just then, a gray-haired man is shoved into the room from out of thin air and stumbles.

"What the hell was that?" he demands.

"Yeah, they weren't lying about the angel thing," Dean says, pushing himself up off the counter and approaching the man. "Have a seat, Padre, we're gonna have a little chat."

Gabriel and Castiel return to the room, the archangel flopping down on the couch beside me and tossing an arm around my shoulders lazily, knocking Sam's arm off me in the process. Sam glowers mildly over my head, but surrenders me to my brother's grip. Castiel leans on the divider in the motel room, looking drained. The transportation must have taken a lot out of him.

"I knew Leah's been unlike herself for a while, but-" Pastor Gideon is saying when I return my attention to the conversation.

"That girl is not who you think she is. She is the Whore of Babylon, and only a true servant of Heaven can kill her," Castiel says quietly, nodding to the twisted stake on the table.

"No. She's my daughter," Pastor Gideon protests weakly.

"I'm sorry, but she's not. She's the thing that killed your daughter," Dean says grimly.

"That's impossible."

"You've been claiming to hear messages from angels and fighting the Apocalypse, not to mention all the demon attacks on your town, and you think this is impossible?" I deadpan.

"Who're you supposed to be, anyway?" Pastor Gideon snaps at me.

"Oh, I'm an amnesiac fallen archangel named Ariel. Nice to meet you." The pastor looks scandalized. Gabriel snorts with amusement.

"Look, we get that this is tough," Sam cuts in gently, "But if you don't do this, she's going to kill a lot of people. And damn the rest to hell."

"Why does it have to be me?" Pastor Gideon says weakly.

"You're a servant of Heaven," Gabriel points out.

"You two are angels!"

"Poor example of one," Castiel intones and Gabriel shrugs.

"I'm kinda in between at the moment." I elbow him, ignoring that it feels like I'm hitting a cement block. Reluctantly, Pastor Gideon sighs and picks up the cypress stake.

"Heads up." Dean tosses an aspirin bottle to Castiel as the angel sits on the sidewalk in front of the motel room. The hangover's begun to set in and Gabriel, much to Castiel's irritation, refuses to heal him for a while. He and Sam are inside the room with Pastor Gideon, informing him on what exactly to do. I sit next to Castiel while Dean packs the trunk of the Impala, offering as much comfort as I can to him.

"How many should I take?" Castiel studies the bottle.

"You?" Dean squints at Castiel before shrugging. "You should probably down the entire bottle."

"Thanks," Castiel says quietly.

"Yeah, don't mention it." Dean shoves his hands into his pockets. "I've been there, man. I'm a big expert on deadbeat dads. So…yeah, I get it. I know how you feel." I get the feeling I shouldn't be here for this conversation, but Castiel's arm is looped around mine, keeping me from moving. I press my shoulder against his instead.

"How do you manage it?" he asks as he looks up at Dean.

The older Winchester smiles tiredly. "On a good day, you get to kill a Whore."

"Are you okay?" I blurt out as Dean turns away and he looks back at me, frowning.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine." He smiles again, but it doesn't reach his eyes. I unwind my arm from Castiel's and get up.

"I mean, you've been like this since we got back from Heaven. I'm worried."

"Well, don't be." He chucks my chin lightly. "I'm okay, Air." I hesitate, but before I can press the issue, the motel room door opens and Sam, Gabriel, and the pastor come out. Castiel gives Gabriel a mild glare and Gabriel rolls his eyes, snapping his fingers.

"You're fine, you drama queen." Castiel rubs his forehead as the headache clears. "Honestly, I'm surprised the place isn't warded in Enochian, we could fly ourselves right in," Gabriel adds.

"Because she doesn't expect us to interfere," Castiel points out.

"Well, that's just points to us, isn't it?" Dean says, raising an eyebrow. "Beam us up, Scotty." Gabriel reaches out to grasp my hand and Pastor Gideon's while Castiel holds Dean and Sam's shoulders. Within the blink of an eye - I'm really getting used to this angel travel - we land in a church office, where a pretty young girl is looking into the mirror. Her reflection, however, is that of a monster, and that's what gets me stumbling back in shock.

Castiel grabs the girl and spins her around.

"Now, Gideon!" Sam yells, but the pastor is frozen now, faced with his daughter.

"Daddy, don't hurt me!" the Whore cries and Pastor Gideon hesitates. The Whore then murmurs something in Enochian and the incantation sends both Castiel and Gabriel to their knees with identical groans of pain.

The Whore shoves her hands out, sending an invisible force out to push me, Pastor Gideon, Sam, and Dean into the wall. The stake clatters to the floor and as we climb to our feet, she makes her escape. Pastor Gideon runs after her.

"Wait, no!" Sam and Dean race out of the room after the two, and I scramble over to Castiel and Gabriel, who are both on their backs.

"Ow, that bitch," the archangel mutters, grimacing as I help him sit up. His voice is strangled, his fists clenched.

"What happened?"

"Enochian torture spell," Castiel rasps, screwing his eyes shut against the pain. Gabriel leans heavily against the wall as I help Castiel sit up, too.

"Well, what do I do?" I demand helplessly. I don't want them to suffer, but I don't know enough Enochian to stop the spell.

"Just give me a sec." Gabriel winces as he struggles to his feet and promptly collapses again. I catch him before he hits his head. "Or an hour. I'm good with an hour."

"Is there some kind of counter-spell or-?"

"Hang on." With effort, Gabriel snaps his fingers and the heavy book I'd once attempted to learn Enochian from drops into my lap. I flip through the pages frantically, searching for the incantation the Whore had used.

There's an Enochian alphabet at the front of the book. I find each word of the incantation, putting them together to form "pizin noco iad," which translates loosely to "a torment upon the servant of God." I piece together a counter-phrase, "Iehvsoz idlvgam noco iad," the translation of which I assume to be "His mercy is given to the servant of God." I guess that lifts the spell, because Gabriel and Castiel are no longer writhing in pain. Instead, they just look exhausted, as if they've both run a ten-mile marathon.

"Did it work?" I ask tentatively.

"Yeah." Gabriel grasps my knee, the closest part of me he can reach, and gives me a tired smile. "You did good, kiddo." He pats my knee before leaning against the wall again, closing his eyes and catching his breath. Castiel simply nods in agreement and then stiffens, tilting his head.

"The Whore is dead."

"Well, what do you know? Pastor managed to man up after all," Gabriel deadpans and Castiel shakes his head.

"It...wasn't the pastor. It was Dean."

"Dean?" I look up from the book, startled. "But he's not a true servant of Heaven, you said so yourself." Castiel shrugs, clearly too weak to contemplate it further, and closes his eyes, leaning against the same wall Gabriel is using.

Just then, Sam and Dean enter the room again, Dean's expression carefully blank. Castiel fixes him with a scrutinizing glare, but is too tired to keep it up and lets Dean help him to his feet, leaning heavily on the hunter.

"Ugh, you're heavy," Sam mutters teasingly as he picks Gabriel up with ease and sets the archangel on his feet, "Must be from all that junk food you eat."

"And here I thought you thought I was pretty," Gabriel retorts as he lists to the side. I catch his arm, steadying him and letting him lean on me as we leave the church office.

Getting the angels down the stairs is surprisingly easy, given how cooperative they are, but it's getting them in the car that's tough. Pastor Gideon had apparently hit his head, so Sam helps him into the front seat while Dean ushers a half-conscious Castiel into the back. Gabriel ducks his head as I push him none-too-gently into the car, grimacing at me.

"Be gentle, woman." I smack his shoulder to prove my point as I climb into the car beside him while listening to Dean and Sam's conversation.

"What can I say, Sam? I saw an opening and I took it."

"You're not gonna do anything stupid, are you?"

"Like what?"

"Like Michael stupid." The thought hadn't occurred to me, but now that it had, I can feel cold fear settling in my chest. What if Dean does say yes?

"Come on, Sam. Give me a break." The weariness in Dean's tone doesn't reassure me, though.

Once we've got Castiel, Gabriel, and Pastor Gideon situated in the motel room with appropriate pain medication - Gabriel refuses to accept the pills at first and it's only when I threaten to cram them down his throat that he swallows them sulkily - I finally allow myself to relax, leaning against the headboard of Gabriel's bed.

He nudges my leg lightly. "Hey. You were pretty good with that Enochian."

"I was just lucky there was a phonetic spelling next to each word," I point out wryly, "You ought to teach me how to speak Enochian properly sometime."

"Yeah?" His eyes are closed, but he smiles slightly. "Maybe I will."

"Good." I let my fingers intertwine with his.

"Good," he repeats quietly, leaning his head against my shoulder. Within seconds, he's asleep, and I find myself tightening my grip on his hand as I watch Sam finish bandaging up Pastor Gideon's bleeding head.

"How's the head?" Dean asks, keeping his voice down for the unconscious angels' sakes.

"I'm seeing double. But that may be the painkillers," the pastor says wryly.

"You'll be okay," Sam reassures him.

"No." Of course he wouldn't be. The man had to watch what he'd believed to be his daughter for months die, knowing that his real daughter had been killed long ago.

Dean heads for the door and Sam looks up. "Where are you going?"

"I'm just gonna grab some clean bandages out of the trunk. Relax." Dean shuts the door behind him and I hesitate before untangling myself from Gabriel and getting up to follow Dean.

It hasn't escaped me that I've reached out to everyone except Dean. I don't know why that is, but I intend to correct it as soon as possible. I find Dean leaning against the hood of the Impala, his expression drawn and pensive.

"Hey." He looks up at me, startled.

"Air." He straightens, crossing his arms defensively. "What're you doing out here?"

"It's just weird. That you managed to kill the Whore, I mean." I cross my own arms, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, I guess I got lucky." He shrugs uncomfortably.

"You're never lucky," I point out.

"Ariel, just drop it."

"You're going to say 'yes,' aren't you?" I press and his eyes dart to the side before he shakes his head. "You are," I realize, "Dean-"

"Please just go back to the room, Ariel," he says quietly, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Is this because of what Joshua said?" I ask and his silence proves me right. "Screw what God wants. We've done this well without His help."

"You call this 'well?'" Dean snorts humorlessly. "Look around, Ariel. The world's in the toilet, and we're at the end of our rope. I hate to break it to you, sweetheart, but we're boned."

"I have faith," I insist.

"In what? In us?" Dean shakes his head. "I don't get why."

"What else would I have otherwise?" I remind him, "You, Sam, Bobby, Cas, and Gabriel are all I've got. If I don't have faith in you, I've got nothing."

"Well, then, you're screwed, kid. I'm sorry." He looks back up at me and I can see tears shining there. "I'm done."

"Please don't run off on us, not now," I say weakly, "We need you."

"I can't-" Dean breaks off and coming to a decision, heads for the car door. He slides into the Impala and revs the engine. Impulsively, I run in front of the car and cross my arms. If he's going to leave, he'll have to run me over. Thinking quickly, he spins the wheel to angle the car away from me and slams on the gas pedal, pealing away.

"DEAN!" I scream after him, but he's already out of the parking lot. Sam bursts out of the motel room and his face crumples with disappointment when he sees that the Impala's gone. "I tried to stop him," I tell him weakly as he approaches me slowly.

"I know." His voice is hollow.

"Sam, he's going to say 'yes,' we have to stop him."

He nods, looking over my head in the direction the Impala had gone. "As soon as Cas and Gabriel get better." I don't say what we're both thinking: that by that time, it might be too late.

Damn it, Dean. Why must you give us feels? Oh, well, at least Ariel tried to stop him.

I was actually quite proud of myself for finding an Enochian dictionary to help me find out what the spell was (and to help me make up a counter-curse). Enochian is actually very interesting in its pronunciation and things, look it up if you want to feel just a little more angelic XD.

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