Cal was actually slightly alarmed by the message he had received from his son that afternoon. Even though it didn't say anything else but: can we talk when you get home? Hollie's here. Lewis didn't send Cal texts that asked to talk. If he wanted to talk he would corner his father once he got home. So the text message its self was far outside of the norm and that meant Cal was worried. Lewis had picked a good day for a conversation though, one that was obviously going to be heavy handed; Gillian worked late on a Wednesday and Owen was at baseball practice; she would pick him up on her way home. So the house was quiet when Cal came in and when he reached the living room Lewis and Hollie were sitting on the loveseat, holding hands, looking distinctly worried and Cal immediately felt worse. He was preparing for 'not good' and he was confronted with 'terrible', and that was all because of a text message.
"Hi," he greeted, hoping he was sounding casual but concerned and not like he could possibly freak out.
"Hey Dad," Lewis responded warily, practically dispirited. Hollie remained quiet. They stood, still holding hands and Lewis indicated Cal should take a seat on the other couch, opposite them.
Worst case scenario: they had killed someone.
It could happen, Cal mused to himself. They could have hit someone with the car, though he did notice Lewis's was out the front. Or maybe… there was some sort of self-defence issue. Though Cal would hope Lewis would actually call him, then the cops and they'd be having this conversation a police station. He hoped Lewis wasn't going to ask him to help hide a body. That might just be the limit to his 'cool Dad' image. Cal took a seat, watching Hollie and Lewis alternatively. Hollie's car was out the front too actually. But that didn't rule out vehicular manslaughter in its entirety. Lewis's friends had cars.
Second worse: they had been kicked out of school.
Lewis had admitted he knew kids who smoked weed and sometimes kids did stupid shit. All it took was a moment. Cal had. He'd smoked stuff in school and who was to say his own son wouldn't at least try it? For all Cal knew, Emily might have back in her day. That would mean… well it would hurt Lewis's chances for MIT if they had been busted and Cal liked Hollie well enough and all, but if she was leading him astray he would come down so hard on both of them.
"So what's goin' on?" Cal asked once he was settled. They took their seats too. Hollie refused to meet his eye and he knew it was her. He wasn't going to yell, he promised himself. He wouldn't yell, he would politely ask her to leave.
"Don't get mad," Lewis started, which was a really bad opening line.
"Lew," Cal started.
"Promise you won't yell," Lewis insisted.
Cal sighed. "I won't," he promised. "Whateva it is I'll hear you out," Cal assured. Now that he was prepared he felt a little better… and Lewis was a good kid. He didn't get into trouble. He often kept his head down and focussed on what was expected of him. So it couldn't be that bad could it? It was probably something of nothing and Lewis was just blowing out of proportion.
"Um," Lewis started and Cal watched his hand tighten on his girlfriend's. "Hollie's pregnant."
Cal sat still, watching. Waiting for his heart to start beating again. Pregnant. That… and the… Lewis looked over at him, his blue eyes begging.
"We were careful Dad I swear. Every time. We don't know how it happened."
Cal felt the skin of his face start to tingle. Pregnant. Fuck. In. Hell. They were barely half way through seventeen. And pregnant. And… He cleared his throat, felt the blood start to stir in his lips again. He opened his mouth. Hollie was staring pointedly at the ground and Lewis looked incredibly upset. "Hooow," Cal started. "When," he settled on. And then stopped. "Hang on," he raised a hand, feeling sick in the back of his throat and panic in his stomach. Pregnant. Fuckity, fucking, who was freaking yanking his chain this time? "When?" He tried again. Lewis opened his mouth to answer and Cal quickly cut him off. "I don't want to know when, I mean, when are you due? When's the baby due?" Because they might at least get out of high school first. They were so close.
"Uh," Lewis looked sheepish. "We don't actually know."
"The docta didn't say?" Cal asked incredulously.
"Oh, uh, well, we haven't been to a doctor," Lewis admitted. "We took one of those home tests," he added tentatively.
"Right," Cal confirmed he had heard clearly. Mostly for his own sake. Words seemed quite difficult to process right now. And thoughts. And logic. "Ok. And? What did that test say?" He asked slowly because it seemed quite difficult to also speak right now. His chest felt tight like someone had a vice grip around it.
"There was a line," Lewis answered.
"Ok." Cal stopped and blinked. He was reaching for something, reaching, and what was it? Oh yeah. "Those home tests, they're not a hundred per cent. You should really get a blood test to confirm." They could be all freaking out over absolutely nothing. And this should have been number two on the list of worst case scenario. Cal felt relief rush through him for a second and he sat back against the couch. The room was incredibly quiet. Cal just noticed it. Usually there was something in the background, the hum of other people or the outside world but perhaps everything was waiting with baited breath. It seemed Lewis and Hollie were. They were waiting for Cal to take control of this and he conceded that in some ways, while they seemed grown up and adult like and were generally responsible, they were also just kids.
"You have a docta?" Cal directed to Hollie. She nodded. "Make an appointment luv, as soon as you can. Lew you'll go with her." It sounded a bit like a question, but it wasn't.
"We can go tomorrow," Lewis murmured to his girlfriend and she nodded. She still looked scared and she would not even glance up.
Cal realised he was gripping the edge of the arm of the couch too hard. His fingers had gone white. He let it go and shifted a little and took a deep breath. "Uh so, when did you? When did you find out?"
"Yesterday," Lewis admitted.
Oh so that was why he had been so weird. "Well then, thank you for tellin' me," Cal tried again to voice coherent thoughts. Gillian would applaud him for that; positive reinforcement parenting. Well, actually, she'd kick his ass merely for the fact that her baby was having a baby even if that wasn't Cal's fault; but she would applaud him for reinforcing to their teenager that it was ok to come and talk to his father and for not completely over reacting and isolating the kid further. "What did your parents say Hollie?"
"Oh we haven't told anyone else," Lewis answered for her. "We didn't really know what to do next." He looked at Cal again, his eyes frightful and pleading.
Cal felt a spike of fear himself, tapping into his son's. If there was anything he knew about having a baby, it was that it wasn't always so simple. False alarms abounded and pregnancy tests could be wrong. He gave Lewis a firm nod and leaned forward where he sat, determined all of a sudden. "You should really talk to your parents," Cal went on talking to Hollie despite the fact that she hadn't looked up and appeared to be trying to shrink in on herself. He suspected Lewis had suggested coming to talk to his father and that she hadn't wanted to.
"No way," Lewis exclaimed. "They'll kill us."
'I might too,' Cal thought.
"Well they're gonna find out eventually," Cal pointed out. "So it's betta comin' from you."
"Are you going to make me tell Mum?"
Oooh Cal hadn't thought about that. "I think that you should wait for the results before maybe talkin' to your Mum," Cal admitted. Because Gillian really would flip out. "And Hollie's parents." He paused. That sounded like a good plan. "Let's just wait for the blood test results before we worry about anythin' else."
Lewis nodded and processed that information.
"All right Hollie luv?" Cal asked her softly. She looked up and met his eye. She gave a nod. Lewis gave her hand a squeeze. He wanted to ask how she was feeling but that was probably a redundant question. Like shit. Scared, no, terrified, by the look of it and relatively miserable and, well, if she thought she was pregnant, then she was probably feeling emotional or nauseous or something. Something like that would have warranted a home pregnancy test. Bloody hell.
Cal checked his watch. "You should probably head off before Gill gets home with Owen." Unless they felt like a confrontation with her right now too. He figured not.
Lewis stood quickly and pulled Hollie with him. "Thanks Dad." They rushed out of the room.
Cal also got to his feet. He had an insane notion to tell Hollie it would be ok. But what did he know? The teenagers headed out of the room and he sunk back to the couch feeling like the room was spinning. Twelve year old Owen was the one with so many girlfriends Cal couldn't keep track, or at least girls who liked him. He was the heartbreaker. He was the one who was reckless; so like his father. So how was it the sensible one was the one telling Cal he was going to be a granddad again? Cal sucked in a deep breath to stave off the nausea. Oh good lord. He was too old to be raising another baby. Lewis was mature and everything but wholly god would he really be able to cope with a baby? And what about school? And college? Cal was going to have to face Hollie's parents too. It was worse when it was their daughter. Ugh.
Cal heard Lewis come back and got to his feet. He was waiting for his son when he re-emerged from the hallway. The boy looked sheepish. "What the hell happened?" Cal started with more passion than he'd used when Hollie was in the room.
Lewis looked startled.
"You promised me you'd be careful!"
"We were careful!"
"Geeze Lewis. Do you know what it means if she's pregnant? You'll have to leave school. You'll have to get a job and support your family."
Lewis looked shocked. "I know that Dad. We were careful every time. Paranoid to be honest," he looked away showing a little disgust.
Cal was prepared for more of an argument and when he was met with no resistance he suddenly deflated. He sat on the arm of the couch.
"Are you going to tell Mum?"
"No you're gonna tell her," Cal jabbed a finger at him, the anger not entirely gone, just his energy for a rant.
"Dad I'm sorry," Lewis looked suddenly miserable. "I don't know what happened. We used the condoms from school." He looked a little abashed. "And those ones you gave me," he added.
"Lewis," Cal started.
"I'm sorry Dad," Lewis tried again. "I don't know what to say."
Cal got up and crossed to where his son was standing by the breakfast bar. He put out his arms and Lewis stepped into them. He was about an inch taller than Cal but still, when he dropped his head to his father's shoulder and wrapped his arms around Cal's waist in a returning embrace, he felt much smaller. Cal smoothed a hand over his son's strong shoulder blades; he was still all skin and bone but now that he was seventeen, also muscle. He was a young man; a mini-adult. Cal pulled his son back so when he spoke Lewis could see his mouth. "It's all right," he told him sincerely. "Condoms aren't a hundred percent eitha."
"I always remembered to use them and they never broke," Lewis told him earnestly. "I made sure."
"And accidents happen," Cal finished. "It's all right Lew. We'll work it out."
"Please don't make me tell Mum. Not until we know either way."
"You make sure you go with Hollie for that blood test. I'll write you a note for school if you need it."
Lewis nodded. "I'm really scared Dad."
Cal could see. It was all over the poor kid's face. Cal pulled him in for another hug and felt worse for his boy. Badly for having a go at him but worse because his son was afraid and Cal would do anything he could to stop that. He wanted to protect his child but he also needed to prepare him for the worst. He needed to prepare himself for the worst. And then he needed to prepare Gillian for the worst. He pulled Lewis away again to talk to him. "Look Lew, sometimes things happen. But I'll be here for you, every step of the way. And your Mum. For you and Hollie. You know that. All right?"
Lewis nodded. Cal heard the garage door start to go up. He signed to Lewis that he'd heard a car. Lewis looked stricken. Cal gave him a nudge. "Be cool," he commanded and Lewis nodded.