Hitting the ground

"For Christ's sake, Tegan! I know you are not the one for gossiping, but literally EVERYONE in the Order could hear that warrior friend of yours yelling! I even had Mira knocking at my door asking if I let the devil loose in here!"

Lucan was fuming. He himself had understood everything Mare had been yelling, for Lucan had been born in Sweden, he knew the language – as the good old version of Norwegian was pretty close to Swedish and Lucan spoke both languages fluently. It had not calmed him down at any rate.

"Who IS he?!"

Lucan was pacing up and down in the tech lab, raking his hair with his hands, trying hard to remain as calm as possible and not to yell – but every syllable was darting out of his mouth like a bullet and every sentence was a hiss. When there was one thing the leader of the Order didn't like, it was not being in the know. Because that meant, he wasn't in control and not being in control meant he wasn't able to protect the ones at the compound. It meant he couldn't do his job.

It was already enough that they had a rebel queen, bloody MI6-Captain Breedmate on a suicidal vendetta trip who had dared to fucking SHOOT A WARRIOR IN THE SHOULDER which he hadn't been able to prevent.

Tegan knew exactly, what Lucan was thinking – he knew him long enough; there was no need for an emotional check with his gift. He just had to look at the vampire, who was trying hard not to snap.

"Luc, calm down, okay? That's not Tegan's fault, actually it's thanks to him we don't have that warrior going all berserker here.", Gideon interjected.

Lucan growled, glaring at Gideon.

"I know…!", he grumbled.

"Luc, don't beat yourself up over Niko and that MI6-Captain, she is a little devil, no one could see that coming and Niko just underestimated her, we all did that. And even now, it's no harm done, Niko is fine again, Tess saw to that and we all know about what she can do now."

Again, Gideon tried his best to calm him down – not without any success, Lucan was indeed becoming calmer, but he was a Gen One – calming down did not mean he was any less deadly – just the thing was, he was not really angry at the MI6-Captain or the warrior at the Medical Station. – Alright, he WAS angry at them. But that was no match to how angry he was at himself.

"Lucan. I'll tell you more about Mare as soon as I know more myself. I could tell you what he told me so far, but he is already fuming at me, he was completely taken aback when he saw me again – and after, well, almost five centuries. – Let's say his past and mine have certain, very similar parts. He thinks he failed to protect the Breedmate he loved. Right now he is a loose cannon, it just needs a spark to let him snap.", Tegan finally said calmly.

Lucan looked at him seriously. He knew how hard it was to lose a Breedmate from Tegan. The warrior had hit the ground so hard, he had barely been able to get up again and until Elise, he had been as cold as ice, wanting to kill Lucan with his own hands, living just to kill him one day, more repeating that to himself to not go insane, to not drown in sorrow himself.

"You mean that's not even the full story yet?"

Tegan nodded.

"I know from Trondheim that he took his father's head in revenge for his mother as you did. And when I met him, he poured his heart out to me after I read his feelings for Helin. He had protected and loved her from when she was a toddler. He just went away to look for his mother, just to find her dead and avenged her – it took him half a year – and almost his life. When he returned, Helin was married and pregnant. – She was giving birth to a son when I met him, I helped her with that, as did Mare."

Lucan cursed under his breath. Fuck it that was quite something already. And as Tegan had told him already, it was not even the full story – and even Tegan did not know the full story yet.

"And you left after THAT?"

"…Yes. Yes, I left him in an… quite unstable emotional state. Actually, I asked him to join the Order back then. But he declined, pointing at the responsibility he had with the newborn baby. He said, he was not his father, but the man was not even there when his son was born, actually Mare said Morten's father might not even know his wife was pregnant when he ran off and was never seen again – at least not until Morten was born. I don't know whether he showed up later, but I guess he didn't. Maybe he died, maybe he really just ran off, anyway, Mare was ready to rip his head off for the whole thing, even if he would have never done that, because he did not want to upset Helin in any way. – Or her son."

Milena had not seen what had happened, nor had anybody told her. But she had also heard the yelling, the screaming, noises of a very angry member of the Breed – and as always, people underestimated her gift.

She wasn't fully in the know yet, but she was not far away from that either. But right now she was following Tess again, who wanted to check on her ribs again.

Tess was carrying around her baby son, Xander, a cute, six week old baby with a few light brown strands and aquamarine blue eyes. And right now he was even cuter. Because he was soundly asleep.

"I'm fine, I have dealt with bruised ribs before…"

She was not going to be so honest to say she had been fighting with bruised ribs and an shot-through artery. – Or how she had collapsed in a colleague's arms, only surviving because he had carried her out of there to the ambulance.

Hours had passed since the yelling and it was close to three in the afternoon – a time when the warriors would usually sleep, or well, she had figured that much from the times when they were out usually. It was like working night shift.

But saying the yelling had ended? Right now she wasn't so sure about that, as a loud grumble came across the hallways, the sound emerging from the tech lab, followed by a harsh curse in Norwegian, and heavy, quick steps, a man pacing angrily obviously.

Mare's voice was a growl, a hiss, a curse, mixture of it all, but every bit of it sounded pained, nervous and angry. Tegan looked at him sternly.

"Jesus Christ, stop pacing, Mare! None of that is your fault, okay?"

Mare came to an abrupt halt, pivoting around, hissing at Tegan.

"No! It's not okay! - Fuck, Tegan! ME! Not my fault my ass! I left them behind when they needed me the most! I LIVE for killing Rogues, for PROTECTING them! - Tegan, the haven in Trondheim lies in ASHES!"

His hissing, the harsh words, everything he did - it was a rebellion against the feeling of guilt that was settling down on his shoulders like a heavy weight, almost bringing him down to his knees. And more than guilt. An excruciating pain, which felt like somebody was tearing his chest open and ripping out his heart. This haven had been the home of the only ones he had still been able to call family. His best friend and his mate – and their children. His godsons. Thore. Cassia. Jaron. And their youngest, just born 3 weeks ago… Eldar. And he hadn't heard a word from them. Not a single thing since he had seen the pictures of the destroyed haven.

Outside Tess and Milena looked at each other.

"Milena, can you take Xander? I'll get Gideon..."

The pretty, young Breedmate looked worried.

"Sure..."

Tess put the little sleeping boy in Milena's arms and dashed. Milena pulled the little one close, re-arranged the blanket around the baby boy and stepped closer to the door, looking through the glass.

Inside, Mare stopped midsentence. He was staring past Tegan at the woman with the short, wild hair, cradling a newborn baby in her arms, looking right back at him, her green-blue eyes meeting his steel blue ones.

"Mare?"

He staggered back, his hands reaching for every support he could get.

"No..."

Tegan followed Mares gaze - and cursed.

"Tegan, please tell me you are seeing them too...! Or am I starting to see ghosts while I am awake?!"

Tegan stepped up to him, blocking the sight between Mare and that damn woman with the kid, who now took in a deep breath, one hand carefully stretched out to the door handle, pushing it down.

"Stay out, woman!", Tegan hissed, a warning growl leaving his throat - a sound which would have more likely belonged to a lion.

But that was what he was, what he was doing. A powerful male member of the Breed, protecting his kith and kin. Mare was in a state, which he wished nobody to be in. He had been hunted and haunted by his memories as well, was still - seeing a woman resembling Sorcha had thrown him off his pins often enough.

Calmingly he put one hand on Mares arm, holding him still, trying to keep him from shaking more, from collapsing to his feet.

Immediately Mares pain, the feeling of guilt and a mixture of confusion and desperate hope was kicking in, rushing through his veins, making him growl lowly. Mare was at the mercy of his feelings - and his feelings hadn't much mercy left for him.

"Come, mate, come... It's all good, you aren't going crazy..."

He carefully unwrangled the desk from Mares firm grip, leading him to the next chair. Mare collapsed on it, still shaking, his eyes fixed on the spot where he had seen Milena and Xander - or in his vision Helin and baby Morten.

Tegan himself could not deny the resemblance, apart from her scars; Milena was like a copy of Helin Henderson.

"Tegan... What the hell... Was I seeing then...?", Mare whispered, a violent tremor in his voice, every syllable drenched in a centuries old pain.

"Sh... You need to calm down first, okay? It's good. Don't worry."

Hardly anyone had ever heard Tegan speaking as softly and calming as Mare did right now - and Gideon, who now yanked the door open.

"What happened?", he asked silently, approaching to the two of them carefully.

"Our guest happened; she was standing in the hallway with Xander in her arms."

Gideon looked at him seriously.

"The Breedmate you were talking about, who she reminded you of... It was his?"

The question came calmly, without any hint of an accusation - and still, Tegan felt guilty. He should have kept it in mind. But he hadn't.

"Helin. Yes."

It wasn't quite it, she hadn't been his Mate - but she had been the one - and the only in every aspect, as Tegan realized now, in almost 500 years.

He cursed silently.

"Jesus, Mare...!"

Mare looked up, realizing what Tegan had just felt through their touch. - What he probably could have guessed already anyway.

"It's... Not like you've been the womanizer either, Tegan...", he muttered in defense.

It was not like he wasn't right.