Just warning you that this is utter nonsense and I shouldn't have posted it at all. Promist my next chapter will be more... everything! Also, there's a fair amount of bloodshed towards the end. You can't write CLAMP without a little okay? Try and enjoy~!

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Yuuko lept out of her bed in a single fluid motion as an alarm began to bleet an urgent signal throughout the house. A small light was flashing red, urgently and rhythmically. Yuuko's eyes widened as she realised the danger that she all of her guest were in. She hurriedly wrapped her yukata tightly around her and dashed to the common room, where most of her guests had crowded, all woken by the same alarm that was ringing through the house's new PA system.

There weren't many worried faces until Yuuko entered, but after that they all became panicked as they saw genuine distress in her sleepy face. A feminine voice raised a question, but Yuuko quickly executed an effective "Shhhh!" Somehow managing to make it an exclaimation. When silence fell over the small crowd Yuuko whispered one, terrifying word which sent shivers through the group.

"Fangirls."

Many turned and fled back to their rooms in fear, the rest were ushered out by Tomoyo, who was still in her nightcap, under which was a face filled with concern.

As the last couple disappeared silently back to the safety of their rooms, Yuuko turned to the wall at her back and pushed a huge red button, which no one had ever seemed to noticed before. She grabbed the stopwatch which Hokuto had stumbled in carrying, as per her instructions on the event of a disaster like this. Tomoyo had carefully locked all the windows on her way back from checking rooms and began to set her camera up at the front door where she had a clear view of the enormous crowd which had gathered out the front of Yuuko's house. The fence's forcefield against evil seemed to be holding them at bay, but the ferocity with which the girls tried to get in intimidated even Tomoyo's fanatic nature and Hokuto was impressed by some of the interesting outfits displayed.

Yuko's head flicked left towards the kitchen as a loud crash was heard. Fujitaka gave a small cry of alarm as two mecha-suited figures burst out of the oven where he had just a moment ago been preparing midnight snacks. She readied herself to push the stop button as a red and blue blur sped past her. She cried out their record time as they got to the door, where Tomoyo captured their high speed banter on her precious camera.

The fangirls squealed as they sighted their prey exiting the house. The two suited, obviously male, figures struck a fetching pose in front of the crowd, inciting sudden silence. But before they could cry their catchphrase, one of the many girls squealed: "It's Duklyon Defenders!" Which caused many of the other to squeal too.

There were more squeals as the red figure removed his helmet and turned to the blue.

"Hey Take-pon! They know who we are! We're famous!" He cried with much glee.

The blue figure responded by removing and throwing his helmet at his companion. "Kentarou! Who is Take-pon? My name is Takeshi!" His words managed to be heard over the noise of the fangirls, some would say that it was because of hidden microphones, but who would incite such a wrath as that of a fangirl.

The fangirl crowd was awed by this display of companionly conversation before their eyes. Many fainted and others began to speak in a language unknown to any living creature. Takeshi's eyes widened as her took in the impressive sight before him. Never in his life had he seen so many girls gathered in one spot. He saw Kentarou straighten up, after having ducked the well aimed helmet, and scowled.

Placing his hands on his hips Kentarou looked around, savouring the oppotunity to finally get outside as they had been confined to a small section of the house as guards. He grinned at the crowd of females and then at Take-pon, who was already scowling in his direction.

"Oi, Take-kichi, I haven't seen so many girls since the General held that Valentine's Day festival!" He crowed happily, throughly enjoying Takeshi's face-palm response. He had tried to repress those memories, but, as always, Kentarou was there to remind him.

Tomoyo's camera whirred as she endevoured to capture Kentarou's sad face as he tried to cheer up his friend. There was a commotion behind her, but she paid no attention, too focused on her work to realise there was a terrible event just about to happen.

Hokuto blocked the door with her slim body as a panicked Yasha held Ashura over his shoulder and demanded to get outside. Yuuko slipped into the room, now dressed in a much more suitable kimono, and enquired as to the noise inside. Ashura looked up from Yasha's shoulder as she entered and grinned evilly at her.

"My wish is to go outside Witch, what is my price?" He said darkly, an evil aura clouding around him. Yasha's panic grew and Hokuto drew aside, afraid of the demonic voice coming from the tiny figure in Yasha's eyes. Yuuko just shook her head and waved him outside, a glint of fear and regret in her eyes as she did so.

Tomoyo's eyes widened as she saw Yasha strumble out of the house with Ashura in his arms. She almost shouted a warning, but decided against it when she saw Ashura's face. Instead she gave the signal for the retreat of the Duklyon, but her attention had wavered too long. There were cries of glee as the pair was carried away by a group of fangirls, no doubt to be tortured into reading fanfictions about themselves and having to cosplay. The cried of fear from the pair of captured boys brought tears to Tomoyo's eyes and even Yuuko turned away in despair.

A fair sized group remained at the gate, a few daring to slip through a small hole and gaze wonderingly around. It was this distraction which allowed Ashura to approach quietly and unnoticed. There was a disconcerting growl and a cry which sounded suspiciously like 'I smell fangirl blood' and Ashura devoured them all.

The next morning shop was surrounded by an aura full of fear and shame. Ashura was asleep in his room, carefully watched over by Yasha who was attempting to clean the blood from his charge's little hands. The angels wept as Yuuko performed some purifying spells over her now blood-stained front yard. The Kokuyo lay with his head in Hisui's lap, stomach full after devouring many souls. Everyone was a little shocked, although Tomoyo was managing to take advantage of the fact that most of the couples were comforting each other in heart rending and touching scenes.

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Apologies! SOrry to let you down! I'm really just posting this to get it out of the way. It's been sitting around for a little while now and I've tried rewriting it a couple of times and I think this is as good as it got. Sorry to shock anyone with the violence with which I solved the problem, it sort of wrote itself. :S Who's next? Urrrr... Probably Rikuo and Kazahaya, just to lighten the mood a little.

Again, I apologize for the poor quality and non-existent purpose of this chapter. I'm not very clever okay? I couldn't save it okay? *weeps*