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Dogward/Brokenward/Virginward/Beachward

Chapter 31

BPOV

I wake in the morning, snuggled up next to Edward. His arm lies across my body. I move as little as I can to see his face. He looks so young, unbothered. A small smile plays across his lips.

Did I put that smile there? Did I push him too much? I told him, no regrets, and I meant it. I have no regrets, only concern that my forwardness was too much, too soon.

My body was telling me it wasn't soon enough, but my brain knows I have to take baby steps with Edward. The problem is, I didn't think he was ever going to initiate anything physically between us.

Being the aggressor was easier than I thought it would be. I just had to do what my body wanted. I am so intensely attracted to him. My draw to him is practically an instinct. Convincing him to go along was the difficult part.

He let go, and it was beautiful to watch. He's so shy, but so sexy. He doesn't even know it, which makes him even more appealing. When we kiss, I'm on fire. Wherever we touch, I burn. I burn for more. More of him. Fully clothed, and that was the best sexual experience of my life. Pathetic, I know.

And then there's the bombshell he dropped before we went to sleep. His parents were killed by a drunk driver and he was in the car with them. Well, that explains his aversion to drinking and driving.

I have so many questions, but I can be patient... about some things.

I sneak another look at his face and he's watching me. Smiling.

"Good morning, beautiful." He says, sleep in his voice.

"Good morning, handsome." I respond.

No awkwardness between us, whew.

~MMB~

The next few days are a blur. We're still in our little intimate bubble. Soft touches, fiery make out sessions. Nothing as... fulfilling as the night on the couch. Sign...

"I need to go by my house pretty soon. I've been putting off doing some work for my editor for too long." I say over breakfast one morning.

"Of course, when do you want to go? I can go with you this weekend, or you could go with Seth." He says disappointment in his voice. Aw, he wants to go with me, so sweet.

"I can wait until the weekend. Maybe we could spend the night there so I can air the place out. Jake has been watering outside, but otherwise the place has been closed up. I'm sure it's stuffy and dusty."

"Actually, my parents are home from their trip and they want us to come to dinner on Sunday. We could sleep at your place after dinner. They live closer to your house anyway, if you want to come to dinner at my parents that is." Why is he so insecure?

"I'd love to see your parents. Will everyone be there?" I say enthusiastically.

"They usually are. I can call Jasper and Emmett if you want me to find out."

"No, it's okay. I'm sure I'll talk to Alice this week."

This should be interesting. How are Edward and I going to be around his family? Is our affection only for private? If they question us about our relationship, what do we say?

"Um, I'm going to see my therapist twice this week. She would like to meet you." He says not looking up from his plate.

When I don't respond, he gets all nervous. "You don't have to meet her, Bella. It's nothing formal. She just wants to put a face with the name, since we talk about you a lot."

"You talk about me?" I squeak. Oh, shit. What does that mean? I need counseling too? I'm hindering his progress? My heart is pounding. "Uh, I don't know."

He reaches across the table and takes my hand. "I didn't mean to upset you or put you on the spot. You're a big part of my healing right now. She just wants to meet you. Just think about it, no pressure." He says, giving my hand a squeeze before releasing it. He smiles at me nervously.

"Um, okay. I'll think about it." I say.

We wash the breakfast dishes side by side. I'm too lost in thought to talk. I catch Edward watching me. When our eyes meet, I can tell he's trying to figure out what I'm thinking so hard about.

My thoughts and emotions are all over the place. I feel like I'm in over my head with Edward and his revelations right now. He's shared some really heavy stuff, especially lately. He keeps sharing without my asking or questioning. That's good right? Or is it not? Why does the therapist want to meet me? Am I a bad influence on him, a distraction?

I take a deep breath before I speak. "I don't mind meeting your therapist as long as she's not going to ask me to stay away from you." I'm laying my insecurities out there.

"What?" He asks, obviously shocked. "Why would you say that?"

"I don't know. Maybe she thinks I'm not good for you. You're making such great progress talking about your past. Maybe she thinks you'd be doing even better if I wasn't around." I shrug.

"Exactly the opposite, Bella, she probably wants to thank you. I've opened up to you more than I've ever opened up to anyone. She probably wants to meet the person who's helped me so much." He says, pulling me into a hug.

"Are you sure? I want to be good for you. I only want to help you." I sigh into his chest.

"You are good for me. The best." He says, rubbing my back. "Please, don't ever worry about that."

"Okay."

"I better get going. My appointment is in an hour." He kisses me on the lips, and heads to the shower.

That was scary. Just thinking about being out of Edward's life almost gave me a panic attack. I'm almost as scared to realize how strongly I feel about him. No matter what, I will see this through. I will be there for him as he faces his past. What happens after that is anyone's guess.

~MMB~

In the nights that follow, Edward tells me that he spent almost a year in and out of the hospital because of his injuries. He doesn't elaborate on those injuries. I've seen no outward signs of injury as he doesn't have any visible scars or physical limitations that I can see.

I learn that he met Esme while he was in the hospital, and Esme brought Carlisle back to meet Edward that same day. They visited him every day they were in England for the medical conference. They started the adoption procedures during that visit. Carlisle and Esme used to go to a conference in England every year until Edward came to live with them.

He tells me that his Aunt and Uncle planned on adopting him, but his money was tied up in a trust fund until he was eighteen. Without access to his money, they didn't want him anymore. They blamed it on his health issues, but he knows it was the money. What horrible people. How could they do that to an injured child, family?

On Friday, we go together to his therapy appointment. I wait uncomfortably in the waiting room during Edward's session. I try to keep busy reading emails, playing Words with Friends, whatever I can do to keep myself from freaking out. I want to make a good impression on his therapist.

The door opens making me jump. I stand as Edward enters the room. An older lady with a kind smile is following him.

"Bella this is Maggie Cope. Maggie, this is my... Bella." Edward says proudly.

She grabs my outstretched hand in both of hers. "I'm so happy to meet you, Bella." She smiles, looking me directly in the eyes. It should be unnerving, but it's not. We have an immediate understanding. We are both here for Edward and what is in his best interest.

I smile in return. "It's a pleasure to meet you too, Mrs. Cope."

"Please call me Maggie." She says, giving me a squeeze and a wink, before releasing my hand.

"Thanks, Maggie, see you next week." Edward says grabbing my hand and heading out the door.

I smile and wave to her over my shoulder.

"You're very, um, excited." I say as he drags me into the elevator.

When the elevator doors close he spins me around and pins me to the wall with his body. His hands are on the wall on either side of my head. He just looks at me, smiling.

"What?" I ask nervously.

"You are very beautiful, Miss Swan." He says kissing my neck. "And you smell amazing." Kiss. "I'm lucky to have you in my life." Kiss.

He's never done anything like this before. Just when he's about to kiss me on the lips, ding. The elevator door opens. He pushes off of the wall, taking my hand like nothing happened.

If he wasn't holding my hand I don't think I could walk. I'm a panting, hot mess.

He smirks like he knows what he's done to me.

Besides needing a change of panties, I'm able to function while we go out to lunch. However, the sexual tension is at full force.

I'm sure we look like any normal couple. Touching, laughing, kissing. It's nice to pretend.

Before dinner, we work out together in his home gym. He has weights, a tread mill, an elliptical type machine and a mat for stretching. Over the past week he's shown me how to use everything.

Don't ask me how a sweaty Edward can be so damn sexy, but he is. All he's wearing today is a pair of long gym shorts, no shirt. He knows I like it when he works out without a shirt on. He's such a tease. Maybe I should work out topless?

I get my revenge after our workout. When we're heading out of the gym to take showers, I purposely walk ahead of him. I start shedding layers of my workout clothes as I go; tank top...gone, exercise bra...gone, shorts...gone. I smile over my shoulder at him; just before I bend at the waist and remove my panties. I go into the bathroom, leaving him there standing in the hallway, his hands over his junk. Internal fist pump, Bella! Enjoy your shower, Edward.

That night we watch a movie, his choice tonight, an action movie as usual. I doze off part way through with my head on his shoulder. When I wake up my head is in his lap and he's stroking my hair. I turn to look at him and he grimaces. I quickly raise my head and he gives me a tight, apologetic smile. Did I hurt him? Why the grimace?

"Sorry." I mumble as I get up and head to the bathroom to brush my teeth.

When I go into the bedroom the lights are already out and he's lying on his back staring at the ceiling. I climb under the covers and he opens his arm for me to lay my head on his chest.

"Maggie thinks you may have some questions for me. But I may not answer them all just yet. Are you okay with that?"

"It doesn't matter what I want, Edward. Are you okay with that?" I ask.

"Yes, I think so. Some things just might be too difficult for me to answer, now."

"Um, okay." I pause for a minute. "What were your parents like?"

"I wish my memories were clearer. I know I look a lot like my mother, but I'm built like my dad. They were very much in love and affectionate. Our house had a lot of love and laughter. It wasn't perfect, but we were happy..." He drifts off, pausing. "I have a few family photos. I'll show you some time."

"I'd like that." I say yawning. "Thanks, Edward, for sharing yourself with me."

He kisses me on the head and we fall into a peaceful sleep.

As usual we wake wrapped in each other's arms. I didn't think I was a cuddler, but with Edward I am.

Edward starts to get up, but leans over to give me a kiss. I grab him and pull him down on top of me. We both start laughing.

I don't know if it's the laughing, the weight of his body on mine or just because it's us. But the laughter turns to sexual tension very quickly.

I wrap my arms around his shoulders and shift my body slightly. Our bodies are lined up perfectly.

"Bella." He moans, closing his eyes.

I wrap one leg around his thigh. He pushes his body into mine very slightly.

I move my hips under him. I can feel his hardening cock on my inner thigh.

"Edward." He opens his eyes and looks at me. I see desire, lust, conflict, fear.

"Kiss me?" I ask.

He pauses and then lowers his lips to mine. He gives me sweet pecks, no open mouth, no tongue. It's not enough. He's holding back.

I start kissing down his neck, licking, nipping. My hands are in his hair, scraping his scalp. I know he likes when I do that.

He makes these cute little growling sounds when I do something he likes His breaths are becoming irregular and I feel the weight of his body pressing into mine.

"You taste so good. You feel so good on top of me." I say breathlessly as I nibble his earlobe, trying to crumble his resolve.

That earns me a groan. He presses his cock into my leg. Move just a little to the left and higher, please.

"Bella." He moans putting his hands on either side of my face. "We need to stop. You feel too good."

"That's exactly why I don't want to stop. You feel so good." I say lifting my head to kiss his lips, sweeping my tongue across his bottom lip.

"Oh, God." He moans, opening his mouth to mine. We kiss slowly, passionately, until we're both panting.

I slide my hands under his shirt and raise it up. He hesitates and then helps me pull it over his head. My hands run over the hardness of his chest as he watches me intently.

I reach down and grab the bottom of my tank top and raise it up. His breath catches when it rises above my breasts.

"Help me get this off please." I ask. He silently shifts his weight to the side and helps me get it over my head.

He stops and just gazes at my breasts in awe. "Can I touch you?" He asks.

"Please."

His hand circles my breasts, avoiding the sensitive nipple. I push my chest into his hands and he smiles.

Finally, he gently rubs his thumb over my sensitive, hard nipples. I moan in pleasure.

He pinches, rubs, and squeezes, until I'm a writhing beneath him.

When he stops, I open my eyes, ready to convince him why we shouldn't stop. Instead, he looks like he's looking at his last meal.

He shifts his weight over me again and kisses my stomach, between my breasts, my neck. He takes one of my nipples into his mouth, licking, nibbling, and sucking. I think I could cum just from this. Well, almost.

While his driving me crazy with his mouth. I'm writhing and seeking friction with my lower body. My thigh rubs against his hardened length, and he hisses. I do it again and he thrusts into my leg, it's not enough.

I wriggle my body and wrap my other leg around his thigh, opening myself to him. I move until I have him right where I want him, need him. I lift my hips and grind into his cock.

"Oh, Bella." He sighs, kissing my lips.

I pull his hips into me with my legs, setting a rhythm. He gasps, or groans with each thrust.

"Oh Bella. You feel so good. You drive me crazy. I can't stop." He thrusts getting stronger, more purposeful.

"Then don't." I moan.

I'm lost in the sensations, his cock rubbing my clit just right with each thrust. I move my legs higher and wrap them around his waist.

"Oh baby. I'm gonna... are you close?" he breaths out between thrusts.

"Oh yes, right there. Harder, Edward." I yell.

"I can't last much longer. So good, Bella, you feel, perfect." He moans.

I hit my peak and shatter under him all but yelling his name.

He cums right along with me, moaning my name.

We lay there panting, sweating, sated. I rub his back gently as we come down.

I love the weight of him on me. He's so hard and strong, yet gentle and soft.

"Wow, that was..." I offer.

"Yes, yes it was." He says into my neck where his head is resting.

He lifts off of me, giving me a sweet kiss. "I think we need showers. I know I do." He smirks, as he leaves the room.

I lay there a little longer relishing in the moment. That was mind blowing, and once again we have clothes on. We managed to get topless this time. Baby steps, like I said.

A/N

Playful Edward! I like him :)

Some of you are getting impatient with Edward. If you stick with me, I guarantee you will understand why he is how he is.

Thanks for the kind words.

Hope this holiday season is finding all of you healthy and thankful :)

Next update Monday.