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Dogward/Brokenward/Virginward/Beachward

Chapter 32 Part 2

EPOV

I am struggling to process what I'm seeing in front of me. I can barely hear the dogs barking over the sound of my heart pounding loudly in my head.

"Get rid of those dogs or I will." He spits.

I'm afraid to avert my eyes for fear he'll take her or hurt her. Glancing back at him frequently, I corral the barking dogs and lock them in the bathroom. They are still barking, but at least it's muffled.

I return to the doorway. Nothing has changed.

James is standing behind Bella. His left hand is fisting her hair tightly to her scalp; his right hand is holding a butcher knife to her throat.

The look on her face is sheer panic and pain. Her eyes plead with me. To do what? I don't know.

"I knew you'd eventually come home my pretty girl. I've been waiting. Right here in your house. I was hoping you'd come alone, but bringing your boyfriend might just suit me better." He coos to Bella.

"No security, no bodyguards? I'm surprised, Edward. You strike me as being more thorough than that." He says glaring at me.

I don't answer.

"Edward, how does it feel to know another man will soon have your woman?" He goads. "I know things about her that you could never know. I've known her since we were kids. I've looked in every drawer, read everything she's ever written and seen every photo she owns. How can you compete with that pretty boy?"

He turns his attention back to Bella, stroking her chin with the thumb of the hand holding the knife. "We'll be alone soon, little one. Don't worry. I just need to eliminate him and we'll take off together. Where do you want to go, my pretty girl?"

I see tears running down her face. He's hurting her.

I weigh my options. I could distract him and lunge for them. I could try to convince him to take me with them. I could sacrifice myself in hopes she'll be able to get away. Why didn't we wait for Seth? Seth! I need to buy some time.

"How did you get in here, James?" I question.

"Oh, that was easy. The back door could be opened with a butter knife." He boasts.

"How did you and Bella meet?" I continue.

"I think it was in elementary school. I saw her across the playground and I knew she would be mine. I've tried for years to get her to realize that we're meant to be together. But you're a stubborn one aren't you." He coos to Bella in a sickly sweet voice.

"You two lost touch for a few years. How did you find her again?" I probe.

"Our reunion is thanks to you, my friend." He laughs bitterly. "You brought us back together when you hired me to investigate your neighbors. Imagine my surprise and delight when I found my Bella again." He smiles. "Ironically, you reunited us."

"What are your plans for you and Bella once you leave here?"

"I have big plans for us. An extended vacation so to speak. Maybe a honeymoon. Should we give Edward a taste of what we're going to be doing together pretty girl?"

He starts moving her towards the bed. I can hear her muffled cries. A trickle of blood runs down her neck.

"James, you're hurting her. She's bleeding." I urge.

"You have some sharp knives, pretty one. I didn't mean to cut you. As long as you cooperate I will never hurt you."

"Maybe you should tend to her cut?" I suggest.

"Get me what I need then, Edward. Your last kind act for your girlfriend." He laughs.

I quickly go to the bathroom and get a damp rag and a few bandages, making sure to not let the dogs escape.

"Throw it." He says. I toss the items on the floor in front of them.

He unwinds his hand from her hair and bends down to retrieve them. He's no longer blocking the window and that's when I see Seth in the backyard, standing just outside the slightly open bedroom window. His gun is drawn. He signals something to me that I hope I understand. It could be the difference between life and death.

James stands and gently wipes her neck.

I count; one, two, three. I lunge for Bella, pushing her away from James.

I hear the pop. The motions are a blur, it happens so fast.

I cover her body with mine. She's free of James.

Someone enters the room.

"It's okay, Edward. He's dead." I breathe for the first time in minutes.

"Bella, it's okay, Bella. I've got you." And I do. She's in my arms, she's safe. Why is it getting dark in here? Blackness.

~MEB~

My body feels like lead. My arms and legs weigh hundreds of pounds. It hurts to breath. I focus on shallow breathing as I fall back into blackness.

I hear voices, some I know, some I don't. It's noisy. I'm not at home, or at my parents'.

I'm still stuck. I can't move. I drift off again.

I hear her. She's saying my name. I want to answer her, but I can't make my mouth move. She's crying. Why is she crying? All goes black.

"Edward. Come back to me." I can feel her breath on my face. It gives me goose bumps.

"Edward. I need you. Your family needs you. Booboo needs you. Wake up baby."

I want to answer her. My brain is telling my body what it wants, but my body is slow to respond.

"Bella." I rasp out. My throat is so dry.

"Yes, Edward! I'm here. Wake up. I want to see those beautiful green eyes." She encourages.

My eyes flutter. It's so bright. I close them again.

"Let me dim the light." I hear her move away and come back. "Okay, it's not so bright now. Open those eyes, baby."

I try to open them again. Everything is unfocused. I turn to where her voice was. She's smiling at me through her tears.

"Bella, are you okay? Did he hurt you?" I force out.

"Shhh, I'm fine. Thanks to you. You're the injured one." She says rubbing my arm.

"What happened?"

"James is gone." She says looking down. "When you pushed me out of the way you fell on the knife."

"Where?" I can't tell. It hurts everywhere.

"Your chest, your lung. It was touch and go for a while. Your chest filled up with blood. You had surgery and you lost a lot of blood and had to have a transfusion."

I grimace when I try to move. "Can I get you anything? Are you in pain?"

"Can I have some water?" I ask. "How long have I been here?"

She holds the cup while I take a long drag from the straw. "Two days. It's Tuesday night."

"Your parents and Alice have been here most of the time. They just went to grab something to eat."

"I'm glad you're here." I try to smile at her, but fail miserably.

"Edward." She grasps my hand. "I could have lost you. I've never been so scared in my life."

"I'm sorry James touched you. Are you sure you're not hurt. What about your neck?"

"Just a superficial wound, I'm fine." She rubs her thumbs on my palm. It feels good.

"Are the dogs okay? Seth?" I ask.

"The dogs are fine, but missing you. Seth has been busy talking to the police, answering questions. He and Paul are still at the rescue helping out, especially with Buddy and Booboo."

"Okay, I say." Closing my eyes.

"You rest. I'm not going anywhere." She says kissing my forehead. I think I manage a real smile this time. I doze off again.

Dreams and reality are blending together. I like sleeping, it's less painful. I want to see everyone, talk to them, but it's easier to sleep. I can hear them sometimes. They were talking about me, like I'm some hero. If it wasn't for me there would be no need for a hero. I'm the cause of this, all of this. Hero, pffttt.

I wake up when my family is here. They gently hug me and treat me like I'm something special. I don't like it. I smile and I'm polite.

Emmett and Jasper come by. They try to cheer me up with their antics. Talking about how we can have a guy's night now that I'm not tied down anymore. Like that is supposed to make me feel better. It only makes me feel worse.

Bella is here almost every time I wake up. She's the best thing about my day right now. Hell, not right now, for the last month or more. She knows I'm having nightmares again.

They sense something is off with me. I hear them whispering. Hospitals, I hate hospitals. I just need some time, and I need to get out of here. The memories. This place brings them all back.

"Bella, you don't have to do this." I say over my yummy hospital lunch tray.

"Do what?" She questions.

"Be here, taking care of me. You don't owe me anything."

She looks hurt by my words. I don't want to hurt her, but I want to give her an out, a chance to go back to her life. Not the life that was forced upon her with me, by me. I've been really selfish.

"Edward, I want to be here." She says shyly, looking out the window. "I don't feel like I owe you. We are friends remember? You said it yourself. Even after James." She smiles at me.

I'm still not convinced. When I get home she can go back to her life, and I can figure out mine without her.

Bella seems nervous this morning. They are talking about discharging me. I don't know where I'm going to go. I can't take care of myself, yet. My parents will drive me crazy if I stay with them. I want my own apartment, my own bed. Maybe I'll hire a nurse until I get stronger and can move around more easily.

The door to my room opens, "Hi Edward, so glad to see you awake and doing well. I came by a few days ago and you were resting." She turns to Bella. "Good to see you again, Bella. How's our patient?" She teases.

"Hi, Maggie. He's getting better every day." Bella responds taking my hand. I nod at Maggie.

"I'll let you two talk." Bella is up and gone before I can protest.

Maggie sits in the chair and eyes me carefully. "What's going on, Edward?"

"What do you mean?" I evade.

"You're different. Even I can see it and I've been here for about a minute." She says.

"I hate hospitals." I say sounding like a whiney child. I'm reverting, ughh.

"Bad memories?"

"You could say that."

"How about nightmares?"

"Those too." I nod.

"That's to be expected. They should subside when you get back home." She pauses. "There's something else bothering you. Do you know what it is?"

I shrug.

"Would you mind if I tell you what I think?"

I shrug again.

"We've know each other for a long time, Edward. I wouldn't say this unless I was absolutely sure. We've discussed this before. You suffer from Survivors Guilt and PTSD. Both of which have been triggered by being injured and in the hospital again. You feel vulnerable. The loss, the fear, everything you felt as a small child in the hospital has flooded back."

I nod. "They treat me like I'm something special. It just makes me feel worse. I feel like I have some ugly secret and if they find out about it, I'll lose them."

"What secret?" She asks.

"That I'm not special. That I'm broken. That I hurt people because they get close to me. That I'm not worthy of their love." My voice breaks as the tears seep out of my eyes. "Especially Bella."

"Why especially her?" Maggie asks.

I shrug again. "She's special, she deserves... better... everything. And now she's free to find it."

"Are you afraid you're going to lose her?" Maggie asks.

"I never had her. We were forced together. She wasn't with me by choice. Now she knows me, the real me. She'll be gone." I sniff.

"Do you really think that Bella doesn't care about you?"

I shrug again.

"You need to talk to her, Edward. Really talk to her. You are pushing her away with how you're acting right now. At least give her a chance to make her decision on the right information, not secrets and lies or half-truths. You deserve to be happy. It will take time to fully get over the PTSD and guilt, but you can do it. You're not broken, you're human and we all need help sometimes."

"May I talk to Bella? I can't discuss with her anything you and I discuss, but I'd like to see if she needs to talk to someone." She asks.

"Sure, of course." I mumble.

"Edward, think about what I said. You don't want any regrets. Whatever happens between you and Bella, make sure you're honest to her and to yourself. You both deserve that."

I nod. "Thanks, Maggie."

"You have my number, Edward. Anytime you need to talk, don't hesitate to call."

I close my eyes and try to calm myself. Bella doesn't come back before I fall back to sleep. Maybe she's already gone?

A/N

Well... what do you think?

Edward has closed himself up tight this time. What should Bella do? Will she leave?

Disclaimer- I'm not a doctor. I did some research on the type of injury Edward has, but I may be off on the length of recovery, etc. Gotta love fiction :)

Thanks for reading. Next update on Sunday!