Hey, Victorie here. JKR and Warner Brothers own Harry Potter, all related characters and concepts. They own other stuff too, but if I told you, I'd have to kill you...Wait, what did you say, boss? Never mind, apparently if I told you, I would get fired and you would get obliterated. Unspeakables don't have a license to kill. Enjoy!
"So, sir, remember when I had to transform into a beautiful, "well-endowed" barmaid named Bambi?"
"Lupin, you never call me 'sir'. What's with this sudden respect for authority?"
I sit in Todd Tompson's cramped office the next rainy Monday. For once, his office window matches the weather outside. A sudden burst of rain swept over the London area Sunday night, drenching the summer warmth right out of the city. Normally, the Magical Maintence would just make it sunny down here, but our level's guy is a little, shall we say, 'emo' or 'scene' or whatever the kids are calling the counterculture where one listens to screamo and writes bad poetry. Apparently our society has become disconnected from the beauty of a rainfall or whatever. I consider myself more of a hipster guy personally, so I can get that some could consider sunny days a little to 'mainstream' but come on? For one month?
"So, um, I received some information while off-duty about a missing person," I tell him nervously.
"Missing person," Thompson mumbles, grabbing a piece of parchment and leaning forward. "How old?"
"About three years at the time of his disappearance. Male," Thomspon nods and scribbles frantically. "His name is Caleb Keel. Mom's family is dead now. Dad had died, but I don't know about his family much."
"Need to track down the grandparents. Aunts and uncles too. Family will take kids all the time," Thompson says quickly. "What else do you know?"
"The guy who told me this says he and his mother are werewolves. He thinks that had something to do with it."
"Good. Good. When did this kid go missing."
"March 25, 1997."
"1997!" Thompson exclaims and stops writing. "This guy is older than you!"
"Yeah, well, you know how it is."
"We can't open a missing person case from the war! Do you know how many werewolf kids went missing during the war? A lot of them, that's how many. And the ones who we found got put with other families. I'm sure this guy's fine."
"Look, I just want to reunite a family separated by war, alright? Just give me a little bit of time, please?"
Todd Thompson stares at me for a long time. "One week," He tells me. "You have until your wedding to find this guy. Carter can work with you."
"Thank you so much, Thompson," I say as I get up to start on my work.
"Hey! I'm only doing this because The Boss said I have to give you a good assignment after those two last messy ones."
"I know Thompson. Thanks again!" I say, waving and running off.
The next thing I know it's eleven o'clock and my good friend Carter and I are standing knee high in dirt at Marta Keel's house, digging up a coffin marked only by a pile of rocks and a little plaque reading 'Caleb Keel'.
"This is creepy, Teddy," Carter tells me, taking off his robes to reveal a thin white undershirt and boxers. I had already taken off mine. "When I signed up to be an Auror, I didn't think digging up dead kids was part of the job description," Carter tells me. I'm not gay or anything, but Carter looks pretty nice. He is very muscular and toned, without bulking out too much. He's 'smoking hot' as my girl friends would say. Above his sweat covered abs and pecs sits a chiseled face adorned with a bit of light hair and hazel eyes. He seems to have just the right amount stubble, all the time. I'm a metamorphmagus and I can't accomplish that.
"Found the coffin," I say, levitating out a long box just large enough to fit a child. The two of us gather around it and slowly open the box.
"Gross!" Carter says, turning away. I glance in to just see a bunch of bones.
"Carter, the meat's decayed off. We've seen worse when Dark Wizards want some Sectum-torture time. Let's put the dirt back in and get out of here."
"What are you doing?!"
We turn around and see who I assume is Marta's old muggle neighbor walking through her garden with a cane. She raises it up and points it at us.
"Uh, MI6!" Carter yells, using the name of an elite muggle organization who has the authority to dig up coffins, I think. He grabs his badge from his robe pocket and flashes it, knowing she would in fact see an MI6 badge. "This is really important business, ma'am."
"Then why are you in your underpants?"
"You try digging through dirt in the beginning of Augest without getting sweaty!" I yell back. Carter quickly kicks the soil back into the whole, grabs the coffin and my hand, runs around to the side of the house and apparates us out of there.
We arrive back at the the office to find ourselves standing directly in front of Harry Potter, my godfather and Head of the Aurror department.
"Do I want to know why the two of you are standing in the middle of the hall with just your boxers and a- is that a coffin?"
"Missing persons," I tell him as Carter thrusts the coffin into my hands and runs off in fear of getting fired.
"Tell me about it at dinner. Tomorrow night at my house? You and Victoire?"
"Sure. We'll bring soup," I tell him as I throw my robes back on. "Have you seen Spenser? I need her to do a few spells on these bones."
"She's in her office. I think she has time," Harry tells me and glances at his watch. "I don't though. I told Hermione and Ron I'd meet them for lunch," He says quickly, turning a corner and rushing off.
I wipe the rest of the dirt off my face in the Men's room and walk into Diana Spenser's office. "Hey Lupin," The raven haired woman says sleepily as I place the coffin on her desk and open it up. "Bones!" She says excitedly, spinning in her chair and examining them excitedly. "But my birthday's not for months!"
"Can you tell me something about these?" I ask her. She leans over and waves her wand around them, muttering incantations and occasionally stopping to write down a note or number.
"M'kay," Spenser says after a few minuets. "This kid was a werewolf. Seems he was killed by, well, more werewolves. From a few tooth marks, I'm going to say during the full moon. Odd. Why didn't he transform? Unless he died from the bites...Died about a quarter of a century ago, so…"
"Greyback," I tell her. She shutters and continues. "He was five when he died. A bit small, but five none the less."
"Five!" I say excitedly. "The kid I'm looking would have died when he was three. This isn't the right one! Though, I guess it's a shame this one's dead,' I add, glancing down at the bones.
"Let me study these a little longer," Spenser says. "Maybe I can identify them."
"Knock yourself out," I say. "I'm trying to bring a family closure. Maybe we'll both be successful."
Excited about my, admittedly small, progress, I decide to take lunch with someone else. I send a quick memo to Vic, but she's tied up. I check my watch and remember Chelsea has her lunch break in five minuets. I quickly apperate to the Diagon Alley ice cream shop she manages and get there just in time to see her removing her candy cane striped apron.
"Lunch?" I ask her.
"I brought mine."
"Great! Me too!" I say, leading her out of the shop and to a bench. She reluctantly pulls out a tuna fish sandwich while I quickly magic up a PB and J from the peanut butter, jelly and bakery bread I have in my bag.
"So, had Russell tried to seduce you again?" I ask. She nods.
"You didn't invite him to the wedding, did you?"
"Of course I did! I invited all my friends."
"Ew, you're friends with him? Now I defiantly can't be your bridesmaid."
"Of course you can. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Have you seen a mental healer? They can give you potions for depression you know."
"I'm not depressed."
"Oh, right. That's just how you're making me feel. Look, why not you just go on a date with him, okay? He may just surprise you."
Chelsea scowls at me as she takes a large bite of sandwich.
"TED LUPIN!" I hear someone yell. I turn to see Diane Spenser running towards us, almost out of breath. She places her hand on her knees and pants heavily as she waves a piece of parchment with her other hand.
"What is it, Spenser?" I ask the witch, trying to help her on to the bench. She waves me away.
"Remember how in school we learned that the Ministry administered 'tests' during the war to see if one's blood was pure? They were bullshit of course, but we still have the blood samples. I compared the bones to all the five year olds on file and found the one I'm looking for. The kid has already been declared dead because the dad checked the pulse and tried to pull the corpse inside, but failed and ended up leaving it for the werewolves.
"Who is it?" I ask.
"Carlisle Lytton."
Chelsea and I are silent. "Lytton?" She asks. "As in Annalise Lytton? My former best friend and Teddy's school day's arch nemesis."
"Does this woman have clearance?" Spenser muses.
"Arch-Nemisis is a little harsh," I tell Chealsea.
"The two of you once offset all of the points your houses earned in a class by arguing."
"Okay, maybe that one was bad-"
"The two of you destroyed a hallway in a duel over the best qudditch team."
"We were a little sensitive-"
"You beat her up in front of Professor McGonagell!"
"Okay, one, she called my mother a pasty whore and my father an evil child murder! Two, she was wrong; My dad never killed anyone and my mum had a very nice tan."
"Alright, Ted," Spenser interrupts. "I just got some human potion ingredients from some creepy wizard in Wales who the top guys brought in this morning. Can you give the family their child's remains?" She says, handing me a small bag out of her pocket I bet somehow had the coffin in it.
"Sure," I say. Spenser waves and runs off. "How long's your lunch, Chase-face?"
"An hour and half. I missed a few to make up for it so I could refill my potion kit. I'm out of a few herbs."
"I'll get you some herbs fresh from my friend's garden. Annalise still lives at home, right?"
"Last I heard," She says.
"Cool," I hand her the bag. "You can give this to them."
"What?!"
"Annalise used to be your best friend. You're getting her back."
"I don't want her back! Stop meddling, Teddy!"
I grab her arm and took us to the home of the person who hates me most in the entire world. Isn't this job great?
Author's Note: So sorry for the long wait. I was away from the internet for a few days. Any way, I promise the next chapter will be up sooner than this wait. Feel free to leave a review, if you want to say anything, or a PM if you need it to be more...private.