* 82 * 3/5/13

Lily felt embarrassed, exposed, like she just wanted to go hide under a rock. She would have felt bad earlier for seducing Casavir like that, but didn't he want it too? Maybe she had interpreted his recent, passionate kisses all incorrectly.

Great. She felt ashamed, now, too.

Her emotions were so befuddled that she definitely wasn't in the right state to go find Casavir, and especially not to see Bishop. But she indeed caught sight of the ranger entering the large doors to the main hall, though, and quickly retreated to her room before he saw her.

Lying on her bed, staring at the ceiling, Lily felt like crying. Much to her chagrin, she started to, though she managed to keep her sobs quiet.

Then she heard a knock on the door and almost threw her pillow at it in insolence before realizing it was probably Bishop. When she thought this, she almost instantly stopped crying, her mind developing a sort of mask. She got to her feet and went to the door, opening it.

The ranger hadn't really planned things out. Even though the door was opened, he didn't look at her yet, because he had no idea what to say.

"Well, are you just going to stand there?" Lily said with a chuckle.

Hearing the grating sound of a fake laugh, Bishop looked at her. Something about her face, too, seemed off.

"Come in," she said, rolling her eyes at the spaced-out ranger.

He did, and immediately spotted the cat in the corner. The little thing apparently had its own bed now.

"Lily," Bishop started, whirling around to face her. Lily turned around at the sound of his voice. Just then, as a light in her quarters illuminated her face, Bishop saw a reflection below her eye.

She was crying. Now that he thought of it, her eyes were a little red.

He frowned, but he chose not to mention it. Instead, he wanted to get her to show some feeling. He wanted to start by bringing up a neutral subject, but every topic he initially thought of eventually came back to how she ran out into the woods, got sick, and stayed in bed for a few days. There hadn't been much going on since then.

As he was thinking, though, Lily seemed infinitely patient. Bishop gave her a weird look. Normally she'd implore him with a "Yes...?" or something, but there was just an idle grin on her face. The tears didn't make it look any more genuine.

"The cat has its own bed now, huh?" he tried.

"Yeah," she said, looking at Ounce. The cat seemed just as confused by Lily as Bishop was.

Bishop frowned, not getting nearly enough of a response from that to be able to tell anything yet. He thought, trying to come up with something he knew got on Lily's nerves.

On second thought, that was probably why he irritated her so much.

He continued anyway. Hmm. Her cat. The only thing that came to mind when he thought of her cat was...

"Those other cats are probably dead by now," he said.

He certainly wasn't winning any points for tact.

Instead of being exasperated by his rudeness and insensitivity, though, Lily shrugged. "Could it really be helped? They were bred to fight, not to mention terrorize humans."

Bishop's eyes narrowed. Part of him almost viewed this as a sick game, trying to come up with things to unsettle her so she showed some damned opinion again. He thought this was something he'd be good at normally, but he was probably thinking too hard for it to work.

"You could have taken them all in so they didn't have to die."

Come on. Tell me I'm the one who brought him back, so it's my fault.

"I don't really think it'd be nice to ask the Keep to take care of a litter of man-eating cats for me. One is manageable enough."

Bishop wrinkled his nose in disgust. She was starting to act as blank as Casavir.

The ranger sighed in frustration, eyeing her impatiently. Her hair was still down. He wanted to feel it. He'd usually keep this urge in check, but he decided to let it go this once. Maybe that'd get a reaction out of her. He took a piece of her hair and ran his finger through it.

No reaction. She didn't even tell him to stop.

He'd had enough. "Ugh, I'm leaving." Bishop turned back toward the door.

"All right."

"It's not 'all right'; you're acting like a –" Bishop didn't continue, because as soon as he whirled back around, he caught sight of the wet spots near her eyes again.

"Why were you crying?"

Lily smiled. "I wasn't."

Bishop looked at her awhile longer, trying to think of something to say. But the gesture would be lost on her in her stupid daze.

"Whatever," he mumbled plainly. He definitely needed some fresh air after this.