* 83 * 3/6/13, 3/8/13

Lily stared at the door for awhile after Bishop left. That was strange, was all she thought.

Not quite sure what else to do, she figured she'd go to the war room to see if it should be remade into something more...well, useful. They had barely gone into it once since acquiring the Keep. She was desperate to latch onto anything that would occupy her mind now.

However, in order to get there, she had to pass by the west wing, which contained the rooms of everyone except Bishop and herself...including Casavir's. She huffed and straightened, deciding to make the trek anyway.

Neeshka had returned from harassing Bishop awhile ago. The tiefling noticed when Lily crossed the main hall, mostly because of Casavir's presence where the elf was headed. Ever interested in such affairs, she sneakily followed the Leader to the west wing.

There, Casavir stood in the hall. He had come back to the west wing but had not yet returned to his room, possibly for how uncomfortable the surroundings made him feel. When he saw Lily approach with a severe, determined expression, he asked, "Is something wrong, my lady?"

Lily glared at him. "Move," she commanded, shoving him to the side and out of her way.

Casavir was surprised. She had actually shoved him. Was she really that upset?

Neeshka's eyebrows shot upward. Lily was being hostile to Casavir? She obviously took great interest in this, but she felt it'd be better to leave Lily alone instead of play around like this. After trying to make sense of it, the thief shrugged and retreated to go play with Ounce.

Casavir knew by now what happened if he let Lily seethe all alone, so, despite her unkind mood, he followed her into the war room. She was poring over one of the war strategy books inside, and he stood his ground when she looked up to glare at him again.

"Do not be upset, my lady."

"Then don't be delusional, Casavir," she spat in a mocking tone.

The paladin's brows furrowed at her attack. He hadn't expected that. "What do you mean?"

"You're in such denial about everything! About how you feel, about what you are...even about what you believe!" For the first time, Lily was as frustrated about it as Bishop. She felt like she was being really harsh to him, but she really couldn't care less at the moment.

Casavir frowned, not appreciating the unexpected affront. "Why do you think that?"

"You can't let go and just do anything, you always have to think it all through!"

"Forgive me, my lady, but I believe that is part of what makes me an able warrior."

"And a heartless lover," she finished for him.

Casavir gasped. "My lady?" He was beyond hurt, and the severity of the emotional blow absolutely stunned him to his core. He normally would try to understand what she meant, but this time, he already knew. That had hardly been the first time he'd heard that accusation. He could not even describe how much it hurt to hear it from Lily, had no words for how paralyzed he felt to know she thought that way.

"Do you think it feels good to have you enjoying yourself so much with me one second, then pull back like I'm the embodiment of the plague the next?" She felt so exposed and unwanted.

Casavir's expression softened, but he remained serious. "That was not my intention." Guilt began to swallow him, even more than it had when he reciprocated Lily's physicality hours before.

"You left, Casavir!" she almost shouted at him, tears welling up in her eyes.

"I had overstepped my bounds, my lady," he said, keeping his tone level despite Lily's rising.

"And you were enjoying it. Tyr forbid you enjoy yourself once in awhile, right?!"

Casavir stiffened.

"And why do you say things like that? That you 'overstepped your bounds'? I told you to!"

"Forgive me, my lady, but you do not possess your fullest faculties."

Lily's mouth fell open at his audacity. "So now I'm a headcase and nothing I say is what I actually mean? You think I wasn't being serious?"

"...No," he admitted honestly, even though he felt ill of what the consequences would be.

Lily marched over to Casavir and slapped him right across the face. The smack echoed through the war room's walls, as well as the paladin's heart, but no one else was contained in such fortresses to hear it.

"You're such an ass!"

Casavir had recoiled in surprise. When he looked back at her, he had no idea what to say. He'd never seen her so angry. Stunned, he couldn't even muster enough bodily feeling to hold his smarting cheek.

When Lily shoved past him again, he asked, "Where are you going?"

"I'm leaving!"

"No," he stated firmly, his senses fully regained now. He grabbed her arm lightly, but firmly, and would not let her continue despite her tangible anger.

"Don't touch me!" she shouted, swatting at his hand. When that didn't work, she tried to pry his grip open.

"You will not leave like that again."

"Casavir, you're hurting me."

"I am not."

Lily had wanted to scowl at him, but instead, her eyes grew wide. She was genuinely surprised her farce didn't work.

"Let me go."

"Then you cannot leave."

"I can't make any promises," she replied obstinately with the hint of a snarl.

"Then I will not let you go." He grabbed her other wrist and stubbornly made her face him to solidify this point.

Lily looked up haughtily into his hard, icy blue eyes with her fiery greens. From the way he held her arms, the valley between her breasts was deepened, giving him ample sight of her cleavage above her black shirt. Knowing this, she would normally try to use it to her advantage in this kind of situation, but with Casavir's recent actions, it just made her feel exposed and uncomfortable. She wasn't even entirely sure the heartless paladin noticed.

A few minutes passed. Lily had never seen him act like this. He seemed to actually be standing his ground and asserting control for once instead of deferring to the decisions of someone else.

"Casavir," the elf said quietly as the moments lingered on. She had her eyes turned to the ground and was now beginning to feel a little hopeless instead of mad. "Don't you feel desire?" She finally looked up at him again.

He returned her gaze severely. "Do you truly believe I stopped due to lack of desire?" he asked in disbelief, letting go of her wrists.

"You just looked so horrified," the elf reasoned sadly, dejectedly.

Her expression pained him. He couldn't stand knowing she felt he had rejected her. He thought for a long moment.

"I was not horrified from what we were doing, my lady. I was only horrified at what I was doing to you." Lily was unresponsive, and her silence made him uncomfortable.

"Do you really wish for me to display more of it?" he asked, referencing the desire she accused him of lacking.

Lily looked at him hopefully. "I do. I...need it," she nodded, swallowing. She felt sheepish. Earlier, he had been sating her needs for affection and love, but his sudden departure had left her feeling even more vulnerable than before. She felt immature and whiny, and it embarrassed her.

Without warning, the paladin moved toward her and embraced her, wrapping his arms securely and protectively around her smaller frame. Lily, shocked, just looked over his shoulder. He grasped her tighter.

Suddenly, Casavir kissed her cheek. Not having expected that in the least, Lily's eyes grew wide. They stayed that way for several seconds, his lips grazing her face, as she felt her loneliness slowly begin to fade once more.

"Casavir?" she questioned as he pulled away from her cheek.

The paladin slowly opened his eyes. He responded to her soft inquiry by releasing his grasp on her and just barely touching his nose to hers. Then, he reached up to clasp her hand in his, holding it gently.

"Lily," he whispered, elated to use her real name in such a tender moment. "You are dear to me," he professed sweetly, kissing her cheek again.

Lily felt like a blushing schoolgirl at this confession, at his new demeanor. Casavir's sweetness meant more to her now than it ever had before, so soon after she had felt so hurt. Now, the paladin actually seemed to have a will of his own instead of being a holy lapdog. He was even holding her hand completely of his own volition.

Her anger had dissipated at his earnest displays of affection. She was touched even by how he hadn't needed to close the door first to treat her this way. Was all he had wanted this whole time just my permission to romance me?

"Is this better, Lily?"

Lily smiled at her knight, starting to feel content again.

"Much."