Culture Shock
1959
I glanced over at the clock, feeling a bad mood simmer under my skin. Ugh. It was only about seven in the morning on top of it. Everyone else was probably already up. Not that I cared, I wasn't one of them. I may sympathize with the Captain, and last night was fun, but that doesn't mean anything. I am his enemy. I'm on Khan's side by default and when push comes to shove, I have to pay my debts.
I shook my head and sighed. It almost felt like I was reminding myself of that; almost like I had forgotten those things in his presence. Looking back on last night; maybe I had.
I stood, and looked around. The room was blank, adorned with sleek furniture. All of it was white.
How dull. No colors at all.
I walked over to the bathroom, shedding my clothes and taking a shower. I wanted to wash away this world, all of it's unpleasantness. 1971 was a lot less complicated.
I looked at myself in the mirror, my red hair brushed back completely out of my face showing my scar. I smiled, thinking back to when I thought I wasn't pretty. I grew up in a time where heart shaped faces with delicate features, smooth cheeks and doe eyes were popular. My cheekbones were too prominent, my face shape stronger and less round. It looked like I might've been related to a Native American. My eyes, while big but far from innocent.
My skin also wasn't pale. I had a slightly tanner complexion which offset my eyes and bright hair. I had a proud face, and in a time where women were supposed to be submissive; it wasn't popular. Back in the sixties and seventies people thought I looked prettier; and people admired my proud features.
I turned away and put my clothes back on. I dried my hair and put on my bandanna before walking out. I didn't care much about looks now; seeing as the scar pretty much fucked up what I had going.
Not that I was ugly…but I've been over this before. The past is better left behind and dead.
I walked out of the room, shoving my hands into my pockets when I saw Kirk, the doctor and the alien speaking to Khan. Khan looked emotionless. A carved Greek statue came to mind as I watched the Doctor McCoy take a blood sample from him. Curious… were they looking to harness Khans blood to further engineer humans? It was possible. It was obvious I didn't know jack shit about this new government... Starfleet.
"Why aren't we moving at warp-speed Captain? An unexpected malfunction; perhaps in your warpcore? Conveniently stranding you on the edge of Klingon space." Khan asked, his voice low but flat. Spock stared back, contemplating the situation while the doctor and Captain looked taken back.
I felt mistrust bubble up. Those aliens were hostile, and if they found us we would die.
"How the hell do you know that?" The doctor murmured, regarding Khan with narrowed eyes.
"Bones." Kirk cut in. It was obvious that he didn't want to give out any information to Khan…which would be the correct move. Unfortunately, Khan already knew everything. Khan had years of experience, and Kirk had none.
They were in deep shit.
"I think you would my insight valuable Captain." Khan finished, his voice perfectly grave against the air. Kirk stared on, unmoved before looking at his doctor.
"We done here?" He muttered, and the doctor nodded. They walked away, completely disregarding their prisoner.
"Ignore me and you will get everyone on this ship killed." Khan yelled, but only Spock turned to look at him.
"Captain, I believe he will only try to manipulate you. I would not recommend engaging the prisoner further." The dark haired man said, and I almost smiled. The emotionless alien knew what he was talking about at least. The more you talked to that man, that genetic monster, the deeper you dug your own grave.
"Give me a minute." Kirk whispered, and I shook my head silently. Nothing was going to end well now. I felt the tension in the shadows around me, and watched silently as Spock left Kirk. All of the anger Kirk had held back flooded around him again, making his eyes almost glow as he strode back towards Khans glass prison. I held my breath, waiting.
"Let me explain what's happening here. You are a criminal. I watched you murder innocent men and women. I was authorized to end you. And the only reason why you are still alive is because I am allowing it. So. Shut. Your. Mouth." Kirk snarled, authority and anger ripping through the ship. So he was a Captain after all. I was impressed.
"Captain, are you going to punch me again, over and over until your arm weakens? Clearly you want to; so tell me," Khan said, voice low and deep, looking up at Kirk blankly. "Why did you allow me to live?" He hid his emotions extremely well, because even as a trained spy I didn't know what Khan was thinking. His lightning eyes were impenetrable.
"We all make mistakes." Kirk answered, trying to make it come off as a threat. Khans eyes narrowed and a ghost of a smirk appeared. He had caught Kirk. He was using the good Captain's humanity against him. It lasted for the briefest of moments before it was gone. He shook his head and looked away.
"No, no." He tsked, "I surrendered to you because despite your attempt to convince me otherwise, you seem have a conscience Mr. Kirk. If you did not then it would be impossible to convince you of the truth. 2-3-1-7-4-6-1-1. Coordinates not far from earth. If you want to know why I did what I did, go and take a look."
"Give me one reason why I should." Kirk replied, eyes narrowed suspiciously.
Khan stared back, eyes blazing in his blank face. "I can give you 72, and they're on board your ship Captain. They have been, all along. I suggest you open one up." Khan responded darkly, voice lacking any noticeable emotion. Kirk's eyes widened and he walked away. Khan smiled triumphantly before his bright eyes raised to find mine. What was up with the torpedoes? Why were weapons such a point of focus; especially to a man who couldn't die?
"You can come out of hiding now."
I snorted and walked to stand in front of him. I didn't care about the weapons or lack thereof.
"Looks like you've gotten yourself in trouble." I jabbed, crossing my arms. His face remained emotionless, and I had to wonder if he had been acting when he would show me emotion. Then he smirked, his eyes shining cruelly and I knew better.
"Eavesdropping? How typical of you." He remarked, eyeing me as I shifted my weight. I frowned slightly. I ignored the remark, he didn't know anything about me; no matter what he said. We weren't alike, and I wasn't going to continue this conversation.
"You've really got the Captain riled up." I said quietly, looking down the hallway where Kirk had left. Khan followed my gaze.
"Making friends already are we? Having fun?" He murmured, eyes coldly searching mine. I sighed and shook my head.
"No. I'm regretful." I admitted my grey eyes mapping out his mundane cell.
"Why." He softly demanded, face blank. I looked away, my jaw clenching. I debated on whether or not to tell him.
"You're going to destroy him. And everyone else here." I whispered, staring at him. I wanted to be angry with him; with myself for discovering this. But I couldn't be. All I could do was shake my head and play my part until it was over. I didn't know how they had slighted Khan, but God help them. He wasn't going to rest until he'd gotten his pound of flesh.
His eyes sharpened. "If he's half as intelligent as he thinks he is, he'll do as I say. He might survive, and so will his crew. For now I am not his enemy." He answered me, and I felt like I was taken aback.
"You're convincing him that you're not his enemy when you are." I stated, blinking. Tactically, it was genius. But it was so very wrong. So very cruel.
"I meant what I said. I am not his enemy. You and I both know the Admiral is." He reiterated. I watched him careful searching for any lies. What had Kirk done to offend the Admiral? I hadn't liked him, that was true, but was he going to kill another one of his officers and his crew? My eyes were still sharp and suspicious; Khan could easily be lying, in case I decided to run to Kirk.
"Why were they taking your blood?" I asked, looking at his right arm. The grey sleeve of strange suit was covering his arm. I wonder if his blood stayed alive after they took it from him?
"Humans are overly curious, and covet what they do not understand." He answered and I snorted, rolling my eyes. His arrogance was nearly stifling, and it was annoying as hell.
"Whether or not your genes were manipulated, you're still human biologically speaking." I snapped, hoping to take him down a notch. At his core, even if he was an arrogant psychopath, he was human. He had a human's genes. He was just evolved past us. Just like if I was sent back to the cave man era, I would be a god in their eyes, so he was with us. Fancy healing and strength; he had human bones.
The comment struck a tense cord; his harsh blue eyes narrowed almost immediately. Fury tightened his face, and I couldn't help but notice how deadly he seemed. Like some beautiful monster.
"I am not human; I am better." He spat through clenched teeth. Khan's eyes were alive with violence and I smiled, backing away.
"Yes, because a murdering psychopath is preferable to being human." I commented flippantly. The anger left his eyes, and once again they were as cold as ice. He looked resigned, yet indignant.
"I did what I had to for my family." He said, giving me a long look. I felt my face twist in disgust. His words weighed heavily on us both; and I resented that he knew things about my past he had no right to.
"Stop it." I muttered, watching him with burning eyes. A lazy smile slid up his pale face and he inclined his head towards me.
"Why stop while I'm ahead?" He whispered. I felt annoyance creep up my spine. I wanted to rip him out of the cage and strangle him. But, since there was a foot of glass between us, I opted for just walking away and exploring the ship.
The hallways were strange, with people tapping on weird paper thin devices. Technology was so advanced, it was almost frightening.
Suddenly, something bumped into me. I caught myself, turning to see a blond woman in a blue dress thing sprawled on the floor. I helped her up and saw that her nose was probably stuck to the strange device she had wrapped under her arm.
"Oh, thank you. God, I'm so sorry." She said, looking down at the floor then back up to me. I smiled, looking down at her. She was smaller than me, but not by too much. I was a bit tall.
"It's fine."
She looked at me quizzically, her eyes searching my face before landing on my bandanna. I held back a frown. I hated it when people looked there. It's like they could sense that there was something hidden under the red cloth, so they stared and stared. As soon as her eyes landed on it, her face lit up and she smiled brighter.
"Oh, I know who you are, you're that girl they brought in with John Harrison! I thought they had you locked up somewhere…Say, aren't you from the past?" She asked brightly, and this time I couldn't hold back my frown.
"Yeah. My name's Ranger." I said awkwardly.
"Oh, I know. I've read through the file they had on you. You were supposed to be in some sort of rehabilitation facility with John Harrison before he broke out and black-mailed you to go with him." She continued, walking past me. I followed her, easily keeping up with her. So that's what they put into a file about me? Wow. She looked over at me apologetically. "Oh, I'm sorry. My names Carolyn."
"So, is your job to walk around and run into people?" I asked sarcastically when she almost bumped into another person. She 'humped' walking slower and taking care not to collide with the people walking past us.
"I'm a weapons specialist, I'm actually going down to take a small ship to examine the torpedoes Harrison mentioned." She said, turning down another hallway. She stopped abruptly, turning to face me. She stuck out her hand, and I shook it, giving her a curious look
"It was nice meeting you Ranger; I'm afraid this is where we part ways. Wish me luck." Carolyn said, sighing. I looked at her suspiciously. She seemed to be a very straightforward (and talkative) person. I couldn't tell if I liked her or not yet. There was nothing overly suspicious about her. I waved, and turned back.
I stopped in at the bar, and got something to eat. They had one thing I was familiar with. A burger. I got that, and some tequila. After I was done, I managed to knick the bottle and sneak back to my room. I even managed to slip past Khan's piercing gaze. Slightly intoxicated and very tired wasn't really a good way to deal with that asshole.
I got into my room, and just began drinking. And drinking. I felt tears slid down my face, warming the numb skin. I wasn't sure if I was crying because the shit tasted so bad, or because of something else. Jack. That's why I was crying.
I wiped my burning eyes with my sleeve and set down the bottle. I stripped off the awful suit I'd been given ages ago. Agony burned through me as I settled down on the bed. It wasn't because of Jack I was crying now.
It was because of Kirk, and the Doctor and the alien man and Carolyn and the African American woman. Khan was going to kill them; he wanted them all to pay and I couldn't do anything to help them. I was helpless again, so utterly helpless to save them. What could I do? Nothing. Something. I don't know.
Khan wouldn't stop. If I tried to help Kirk, he'd kill me. Dying; dying doesn't bother me. But that doesn't mean I want to kick the bucket just yet. I'd be more useful alive to Kirk than dead.
I drifted off, looking at the white door and wishing that I could just go back to when I was a kid. With Jack. Everything was so much better. So much simpler.
1959
I watched Jack through the window of my new home. My red hair had been scraped up into a fashionable bun for the party we were going to that evening. Jack's new mother chased him down in the snow, scolding him and dragging him back into the house. She was pretty, with brown hair and blue eyes, but she was very strict.
So were my new parents. I wasn't allowed to get into fights at school anymore. Being nine, they expected me to act more 'civilized' or something like that. Jack got the same treatment from his new parents. We had to read big boring books every afternoon for an hour. It was dreadful. No more playing in the mud and getting into fights with each other. We still played, it just wasn't as fun.
Mom came in with her pretty blond hair up in an intricate bun. She had a beautiful flowing pink dress, contrasting with her pale face and red lips. She smiled, leaning down to look in my face. My new mother had a beautiful face, delicate and soft, it practically radiated goodwill and happiness. My new father was the same way, his tan handsome face always seemed happy, even in his dull black suits.
"Come now darling," She said smoothly. "It's time for us to go to the party. Isn't that fun? When I was a girl, I used to dream of dressing up and going to parties." She went on smoothly, and I listened intently. Mom told me she got sick when she was little, and couldn't have children. So her and Dad got me.
Personally, I hated parties. The only good thing was that Jack was there to make it less boring.
Mommy strapped an ugly jacket on me, telling me that plaid was 'so in these days'. I usually ignored her. She was eloquent and pretty…but dumb.
Daddy was already outside in the sleek black car waiting for us. I was ushered into the car quickly. I watched the snow fall as we drove to a fancy house up the street. When we got into the house, it was warm and bright. Everything was golden and fancy.
I felt a hard shove and I stumbled forward. I whirled around only to see Jack. Annoyance and excitement welled up in me. I looked around at the adults, seeing that they had gotten too drunk to care, before I bolted after Jack. I'd hate to get caught attacking Jack and get in trouble.
He ran out the door, into the snow laughing, and I followed him. It was dark outside, and cold, but it didn't really bother us. We'd been playing in the snow for about two months now.
My eyes brightened as Jack stilled, listening for me. I crept up behind him softly and tackled him.
I laughed, then shrieked when he pushed me over into the snow. I was getting up when snow hit my face. Jack laughed.
"Come on Ranger, let's go explore!" He said, pulling me up out of the snow. I looked over at the house, at the bright yellow lights and then to the dark forest.
I grinned. "Yeah! But first we have to fix my hair. It'll get stuck in the branches." I said, sitting down. Jack stood behind me, trying to pull out all the bobby pins and hair ties. He tugged my hair a few times, just trying to rip it out.
"Ow!" I snapped, throwing my fist back to hit him. He swatted my hand.
"Geez, calm down I almost have them out." Jack snapped back, pulling a few more times before he shoved me face first into the snow. I kicked my feet out, shoving snow out towards him and he sputtered before we both laughed before running out into the woods.
It was dark in the woods and a little frightening.
"Jack, do you think they'll notice we're gone?" I asked, looking for his face in the moonlight. He smiled.
"Nah, they're too busy drinking." He assured me.
We walked on for a while, saying nothing, just looking around. "Ranger?" He asked suddenly. I looked up at his golden face.
"Yea?"
"Are you…are you scared of dying?" He asked, and I scoffed, standing taller.
"Nope. Everyone's gotta die sometime Jack. You know that." I answered. He stopped suddenly, and I looked back at him. Tears streaked down his face.
"M-My new Dad doesn't like me or Mom." He said suddenly. I looked at him, worried.
"What do you mean? I'm sure he likes you and Mrs. Hade. Him and my new Dad are good friends, just like our new Mom's." I said, walking closer to him. He sniffed.
"No. He hates me. He cusses at me, and damn it I hate him too!" He yelled. I looped my arm around his.
"Maybe he just hasn't gotten to know you yet! I mean, Mr. Hade works just as much as my Dad does, and they're gone all the time! He just hasn't really had the time to meet you. I'm sure he'll warm up to you once you've lived there awhile. Mom's two cats were the same way with me. One of 'em hated me, and the other loved me. It took the grey one awhile before it wouldn't attack me." I explained, hugging him around the waist.
"I don't know Ranger. He gives me these nasty looks all the time and tells me stuff that I don't want to hear." He went on. I frowned and started to lead him back to the house.
"Well, you know I'll come over there and beat the hell out of him if he ever hits you Jack. We're friends, remember? And you know, I think I can take Mr. Hade." I said gruffly. His arm tightened around me.
"No, I don't think you should. He really doesn't like you. He says you're some kind of godless heathen." Jack said, worry lacing his tone. When we got back into the yard, our parents were there waiting.
"Ranger! What in Gods name do you think you were doing out there?!" Mom scolded, pulling me in front of her. Mr. Hade grabbed Jack roughly, shaking him.
"What do you think you were doing out there boy! What have I told you about wandering off with that girl, huh?" He whispered harshly while my mother and father laughed off my stunt as just exploration. They were never serious people. Anger roared up in me when I saw Jack's Mom letting Jack get talked to like that.
"Jack was helping me!" I blurted. Jack looked towards me fearfully.
"What?" Mr. Hade asked, more like growled, glaring at me through his horn rimmed glasses. I stood taller.
"Yep. I ran off in the woods and got my hair stuck on a branch and Jack helped me untangle it." I said boldly. Dad clapped Jack on the shoulder, and Jack forced a smile.
"That's just astounding. A real good show of character." Dad said to Mr. Hade. Mr. Hade looked as if he just drank cough syrup. Then he smiled at my father and mother, pulling Jack to his side. The movement was rough and harsh, but my parents didn't notice.
I saw the look Mr. Hade gave Jack through his ugly glasses, and I noticed how his wife frowned at her husband.
The ride home that night was long. It was cold and lonely and my young mind was buzzing. Finally we got home; my ugly jacket was stripped off along with my dress and I was sent to bed. I looked out my window at our neighbors, hearing angry shouts and swears. I flinched when I heard someone getting hit. Tears ran down my face.
I felt so useless and small. So helpless, unable to help Jack. I couldn't save him. I couldn't help anyone. Nobody. I cried and cried, watching Jack's house until all the yellow lights flickered out. Then I saw Jack's face, the left side bruised and swollen. I pressed my hand to the glass, trying to save him. He pressed his hand to his window.
I was so scared.
I missed this Jack. I missed my friend. But somewhere along the lines I let that Jack die, and killed the one who took his place. He betrayed me, and so I betrayed him.