Life of a Lily Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Downton Abbey!

I had already written chapter 2 completely different but decided to add it a chapter before it because I wanted to write the dynamic of Mary and Matthew with her pregnancy and continuing to raise two boys.

This is just odd moments of Mary's pregnancy, cute moments with Matthew, cute moments with the children, just a bunch of fluff to take away from the sorrow I'm sure we will all have come the start of season 4 (especially after seeing the promo pic of Mary and the baby for about the twentieth time!)

Mary heard the familiar clink of the Anna placing her tea tray on the nightstand and felt the sun on her face, but she was downright exhausted, pregnancy was particularly exhausting when you have two children under the age of five who love attention from their Mama.

"Morning my darling," Matthew smiled and laughed as Mary groaned and rolled over, her arm draping across his chest and her face nuzzling further down into the covers. "Or not." She heard an echoed chuckle from her lady's maid who took her reluctance to wake as a dismissal for the time being.

"I'm pregnant Matthew," Mary sighed. "I am perfectly content with sleeping all day."

"I'm not sure your mother would approve, or me for that matter," Matthew smirked and pressed a kiss into her hair. "And our sons would most certainly not." He pressed another kiss behind her ear.

"They could join me," Mary quipped.

"If they start thinking they can come in here every day," Matthew whispered, "How could I ever do this?" Having not even opened her eyes yet Matthew flipped her over and got on top of her. Kissing her lips, face, and neck ravishingly. Content Mary moaned and unconsciously wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer. His hands wandered to her breasts before falling lower. Suddenly he snatched his hand away as it landed on her stomach.

"What is it Matthew," Mary tentatively opened her eyes, his kisses having revived her. "What's the matter?" She met his gaze and noticed a foolish grin on his face. "What?" she snapped. Without a word Matthew guided her hand with his to her stomach. Mary's eyes widened as she felt a swell there that had not been there the night before.

"That is what is the matter, or rather, what is amazing," he tried to kiss her again but Mary pushed him off. Sitting up.

"But I've only just stopped getting sick in the mornings," she gasped. "With William and Bertie, I hardly showed for months!"

"Maybe our baby was just anxious to be known," Matthew pushed her gently back to lay down. He gazed at her lovingly.

"Don't look at me like that," Mary hissed. "Because this is only the beginning you know? A slippery slope."

"How can I not look at you like that? When you look so gorgeous," he was wearing that goofy grin again and it was infuriating to Mary.

"I am not gorgeous Matthew, I'm fat," she groaned.

"You are growing our baby in there," he kissed her cheek, his hands running down her sides until they rested on her hips. He shifted down, pulling her nightgown up to expose the tiny baby bump that now resided there. Gently he pressed a kiss there, then two, then three.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"I'm letting our baby know about much I love him or her," Matthew replied. Between kisses he rhythmically stroked the bump. "Papa loves you so very much. Never doubt it for a second."

"That's enough," Mary pulled his head up. "Papa will wonder where you are, and we mustn't keep our boys waiting. They expect to see their Mama after breakfast and at this rate they won't."

"We can't let our little princes down, can we?" Matthew chuckled.

"No we cannot or we would never hear the end of it," Mary laughed. "I wonder where they get that from?" She arched her eyebrow towards Matthew.

"I have no idea what you are talking about," he chastely kissed her on the cheek, untangled himself from her, and got out of bed.

"Of course my darling," Mary rolled her eyes. "Your mother has asked us over for tea today, shall we expect you or-"

"Tom and I wanted to have a look at the cottages today, but if we are finished by luncheon certainly I will join you," Matthew said going to his door. "Enjoy your morning with the boys, I shall see you later." Mary drank her tea and rang Anna for breakfast and to get dressed. Her good mood in the morning was ruined as she struggled to fit her tightly skirt over the baby bump.

"Milady whatever is the matter?" Anna asked as Mary practically gave up and sat on her chair with a bump, crying softly into her hands.

"I'm terribly fat," she cried.

"You are not milady, you are pregnant," Anna reassured her.

"No Anna, yesterday I was slight, I could have fit into this," Mary continued. "And now it will not fit."

"There are plenty of other skirts we can try milady," Anna put a hand on her shoulder. "It will be quite alright."

"I don't even know why I am crying," Mary cried.

"You are pregnant," Anna said, rubbing her shoulders comfortingly. "You've told me enough times before that it is not your fault, now it is my turn to remind you of that."

"Oh Anna what would I ever do without you," she sniffed and Anna handed her a handkerchief to wipe away her tears.

The day was further complicated as she went to the nursery to find that the cold Sybbie had was transferred to Bertie and the four year old was unusually fussy and already desperate for his Mama to comfort him.

"I do not believe he should go outside today," Mrs. Jensen said. "Or if so he should not walk."

"If he is still up for visiting Isobel we shall take the pram, he won't take kindly to it but I will carry him if I must," Mary told the older woman.

"You won't be carrying him Lady Mary if Mr. Matthew has anything to say about it," the older woman quipped and Mary sighed.

"So you've noticed my condition," Mary mumbled. "I suspect many more will in the coming days and I will be known as the fat Lady."

Mary was thankful Bertie was too tired to want to walk and settled for being pushed in the pram instead of being carried, because she wanted to carry her baby boy, and Mrs. Jensen was right, Matthew would never allow it.

"It is such a wonderful day, isn't it?" Matthew asked as the family of four walked into the village, Matthew's hand secure around William's.

"It is a shame Bertie has a cold, we could have allowed them to play in the garden but I'm afraid I won't feel comfortable with that," Mary shook her head.

"Maybe we can all sit outside," Matthew suggested.

"Oh Matthew Bertie will not sit if he is outside," Mary chuckled.

"Perhaps we will have one calm child," Matthew reached out to place his hand on her bump. Mary swatted it away playfully.

"William is as calm as you are going to get Matthew," Mary's eyes sparkled.

"I wonder where they get it from?" Matthew joked.

"You I'm sure," she said sheepishly.

"Mama, Papa, let's go faster," William tugged on Matthew's arm. "I want to go faster. I want to see Gran Iz!"

"Your Mama must take it easy my boy," Matthew told him. "We must go at this pace."

"Why?" William asked. He peered around his father to his mother, his eyes full of worry. She was glaring at Matthew but looked softly at her oldest son. Both Matthew and William shared the same expression of worry.

"Do not listen to Papa my darling, your Mama is perfectly well," Mary said pointedly.

"She just must take care of herself because she is carrying your baby sibling," Matthew told him.

"Baby?" Bertie chirped from the pram.

"I'm still your Mama, I'll just look different for a while," Mary reassured.

"Fat, Mama get fat?" Bertie added and Mary froze, inhaling sharply.

"Robert Matthew Crawley apologize this instant," Matthew hissed. "It is not nice to call your Mama fat when she is not." He looked up at Mary who was sobbing into her hands. "Mary darling."

"It's the hormones," she wailed too loud and too improper in public but Mary couldn't help it. She was at least thankful her husband was not like her father when it came to speaking logistics, perhaps because he was a doctor's son. "But it's true."

"You are gorgeous," he told her. His hands wandered to her stomach. "The fact that you are pregnant makes you equally as beautiful as you ever were, maybe even more." Mary swatted his hands away as Bertie started to cry.

"I'm sorry Mama," he wailed. Mary went around to the front of the pram; though tears were still leaking out of her eyes she took her baby boy's hands.

"I'm not upset at you darling," she murmured. "Mama's just being silly."

"You are not fat Mama," he protested, still crying. Mary wiped at his eyes, though still looking around and thankful that not many of the villagers who were walking around were paying much attention to them.

"Oh but I am my darling, would you like to feel Mama's belly?" Mary laughed through her tears. "It's where your baby brother or sister is."

"YES!" he giggled and reached out his little hands.

"He or she is too little to kick, but some day she will kick and you can feel it too," Mary smiled as he looked up at her in amazement.

"May I feel too Mama," William piped up.

"Of course," Mary ruffled his hair. "Now we better continue or Gran Isobel will wonder where we are." Matthew grabbed William's hand again but held out his arm for Mary. She managed to push the pram with one hand, her other entangling with Matthew.

"You handled that better than I expected," Matthew quipped and Mary scoffed.

"I blame you," as she overheard Bertie babbling about her belly and his baby brother or sister.

"For what?"

"For being you."

"And why is that bad," Matthew chuckled as William ran ahead, seeing Isobel exit the house to greet them. Mary stopped and turned to him.

"Your sons are as obsessed with my stomach as you are."

"Are you sure you are comfortable," Matthew whispered, leaning over his wife.

"Matthew," Mary moaned. "I'm six months pregnant, honestly, I'm not invalid. I would tell you if I was not uncomfortable."

"If you are sure," Matthew mumbled. Mary made a growling sound in the back of her throat as her fingers fumbled with the buttons on his night shirt.

"I'm sure," she hissed. "Now stop talking and kiss me before I get cross." Matthew smiled widely and leaned over to kiss her hard on the lips, Mary sighing against his mouth. Matthew's hand caressed her shoulder and slid the top of her nightgown down her arm. "Oh Matthew."

"I love you darling," Matthew breathed and allowed his stomach to touch her protruding one, though his arms and legs braced him so that none of his weight was on her.

"I-" Mary murmured, her eyes having fluttered closed, snapped open as she felt Matthew jump back. "What is it darling?"

"The baby," he whispered.

"You felt that," Mary gasped, her hand flying to her stomach. "I thought- you couldn't feel that yesterday." She reached out her other hand to hold his but couldn't find it in the dim light.

"Has he or she been moving the whole time?" Matthew gasped, Mary was confused, he sounded distressed and horrified.

"Matthew the baby always moves at night," Mary winced sitting up.

"Does it know what we are doing?" he moved further away from her. "Does it know what we were about to do?" Mary let out a cry of frustration.

"Honestly Matthew, not this again," Mary clenched her fists around the bedding under her hand. "When the baby is born, he or she will be a newborn, which might be the most obvious thing I have ever said."

"But will it know what we were doing?" he repeated.

"Damnit Matthew," Mary hissed, despite her protruding stomach she stood up. "A newborn cannot talk, let alone walk, hold its head up, anything except cry, eat, and go to the bathroom. Do you think it will know if we are having sex?" Matthew winced at her tone. "What is different now Matthew, because we had sex plenty of times during my pregnancy with Bertie and William."

"But they never kicked me," he whispered.

"Baby's kick, it's what they do," Mary wrapped her dressing gown around her.

"Where are you going?" he protested weakly.

"The only explanation I can see for you stopping is that you did not want to make love with me," she said pointedly. "And if you do not want to make love with me, I'd prefer not to be in the same room as you right now."

"But Mary-" he reached out and arm but she stalked towards the door and walked out. Matthew jumped out of bed, his fingers attempting to rebutton his shirt quickly, slipped on his dressing robe and slippers, before following her out. "Mary," he hissed. She was nowhere in the hallway as he peeked his head out. For a pregnant woman she moved rather fast.

Despite not seeing her, he knew exactly where she would be.

"Mary," he ran his fingers through his hair as he saw the nursery door creaked open. He was thankful for their nanny being a fairly heavy sleeper as he spied Mary in the corner of the room, sitting in the rocking chair. In the far corner sat an unused bed, recently abandoned by Sybbie as she was old enough to move out of the nursery. Adjacent to the bed sat two beds side by side where his sons slept peacefully, their blond hair identical as it stuck out in odd ways as his often did in the mornings. Closer to Mrs. Jensen and the door sat the crib, dragged back out from the attic to accommodate their newest addition to the seemingly ever-growing nursery.

She didn't look up as he entered but he knew she heard him.

"Mary please come back to bed, you do not want to disturb the boys," he sighed.

"You should have thought about that when you refused to make love with your ugly fat wife," Mary shot back at him quietly.

"Mary," Matthew gulped, walking to the rocking chair and bending down beside it. Her arms were folded against her chest so he practically at to pry her fingers away in order to hold her hand. "I'm sorry, it just shocked me. You are not ugly and you are not fat. I could not think of anything more breathtaking than my pregnant wife. You are carrying my third and most likely last child, I just… I don't want anything to happen to either or you, I want to be careful. And careful means I do not want to emotionally scar our child before he or she ever comes into the world." Mary opened her mouth but pursed her lips as she heard Bertie shift. His little legs kicked out and pushed the covers off his body. Without a word she stood up and pulled Matthew out of the room, but not before pausing at Bertie's bed to readjust his covers.

"And," Mary said quietly. "It was this point in my pregnancy when I miscarried."

"I suppose so," Matthew muttered, his thumb moving over hand.

"Matthew nothing is going to happen," Mary said softly. "And nothing will happen. Whether we make love or are as careful as can be. OH-"

"What?" Matthew gasped, terrified.

"That was a big one," Mary smiled softly, her hands still in his, placing both of them over her stomach. The two of the waited in silence until their baby kicked again.

"Oh Mary," Matthew tucked her hair behind her ear. Mary smirked and untwined her hands from his.

"You had your chance Matthew," she teased, getting back into bed, more towards the middle. Matthew groaned at his foolishness but climbed back in next to her. Mary placed her head on his chest, her arms wrapped around him. She felt Matthew's hands run softly down her back, settling on her hip, his fingertips barely touching her stomach.

"I'm a fool then," Matthew mumbled, pressing a kiss to her hair.

"But I love you anyway," Matthew nuzzled her nose into his shirt, sighing and closing her eyes. He thought he would be used to his wife's mood swings, but he was always scared he would cause irreparable damage one day, but as his wife's breathing deepened and she murmured contently he highly doubted it.

The last thing Matthew felt as he lost his battle with consciousness was a soft kick beneath his hand.

"Good afternoon," Mary heard a voice in her ear and her head snapped up from the book she was reading.

"There you are," Mary smiled. "I was beginning to believe Papa would have you tied up all day." Matthew placed a chaste kiss on her cheek and sat down next to her on the bench outside.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Decided to enjoy one of my last days outside," Mary said wistfully. "With the weather turning and moving into the last months, I won't be able to be outside for months after the baby is born."

"Do you mind if I join you?" Matthew asked.

"Well you are already sitting down," she arched her eyebrow a leaned her head on his shoulder, holding her book back up. Matthew tipped his head back to look at the slightly cloudy sky and chuckled as he heard the faint giggle of his boys behind him. "It looks like my quiet day is no longer." Matthew turned around and saw Mrs. Jensen ushering the boys towards the garden.

"Mama, Papa!" Bertie trilled.

"Hello my darling boy," Mary sighed. "What are you doing today?"

"Mrs. Jensen said William and I can play outside in the garden today before it gets too cold," Bertie played with the bottom of her dress.

"Yes because you can't play outside in the cold unless you are bundled up really tight," Mary reached forward and tried to button his coat a little more but Matthew pushed her back gently before bending in front of his son and doing it instead.

"Brrr," Bertie giggled.

"Bertie come on!" William hissed. "Let's go!"

"Go on son," Matthew chuckled.

"Bye Mama, bye Papa," Bertie called as he ran towards his brother and nanny. Mary waved to William and nodded at Mrs. Jensen before turning back to Matthew who covered her mouth with his own.

"Matthew," she gasped, pushing him away. "We are outside."

"Alone," he whispered, his hands on her stomach.

"So let's do something constructive," she hissed.

"Like what?" Matthew said arching his own eyebrow is a fair imitation of Mary's famous look.

"Like… names," Mary smiled.

"Girl or boy?"

"Both," she murmured, leaning her head on his again.

"Catherine?" he questioned. "Georgina?"

"No and no," Mary laughed. "Be serious Matthew, William, Robert, and Georgina?"

"What is your brilliant idea then?" Matthew shot back playfully.

"I don't know, I must have time to think about it," Mary tapped her finger.

"So you berate me for my choice of names and you do not even have any ideas," Matthew chuckled, holding her hand gently. "That's not fair is it?"

"It is if I say it is," Mary smirked. Matthew looked at her incredulously. "Fine… what about we think of middle names for a girl, that will be easier."

"A family name?" he questioned.

"Granny would appreciate it if we named a girl after her," Mary said. "After all, she championed for us from the beginning."

"Something Violet Crawley," Matthew laughed.

"That is good enough for now," Mary shrugged. "A boy?"

"Well it needs to go with William and Robert, or rather William and Bertie because we never call him by his true Christian name," he reminded her.

"I was thinking-" she began. "I don't know."

"Mary you can't let me suggest Georgina off the top of my mind and not tell me this, something you have clearly thought about deeply," he teased.

"I can if I want to," she arched her eyebrow. "Fine," Mary sighed. "I was thinking Reginald Crawley, after your father." She looked at him seriously and he returned her gaze.

"Really," he mumbled.

"Bertie is named after my father, it is only right if we have another son to name him-" she was cut off with Matthew grabbing her face and crashing his lips down on hers. They broke apart for a moment. "I take it you like the idea."

"I love it… and I love you," Matthew smiled and leaned in again to kiss her a lot more gently now. Despite being outside, Mary allowed it, because they were pregnant, happy, and on their way to having a complete family.

As mentioned before, this chapter was not planned; I just wanted to show a little more of Matthew and Mary's relationship with each other, their parenting, etc.

Let me know what you think, I promise you will meet Lily Crawley soon enough (: