DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT but I do have kick ass Hello Kitty tattoo!

Hey Party People:

I wanted to get this out before the Breaking Dawn Premiere...yes I'm camping out - Don't judge me! *grin*

I have to give a shout out to Fangmom who listen to me whine, Krysti who has patience of a saint and my co-worker Yvette who dealt with my constant IM's abount random crap.

Now, off to have some beer.

xoxo,

Tammy

Halo - Beyonce

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby, I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby, I can feel your halo
I pray it won't fade away
I can feel your halo

I watched Rosalie through my viewfinder, to most she looked calm and collected. But because I knew Rose, I could tell she was about to lose it. I looked over and saw Alice too saw she was on edge. "Ok, Rose a few more shots, ok?"

She barely nodded her head in acknowledgement, she moved the faux fur coat and angled her body to the side in order to display the garment and gave the camera a sultry smile. I heard a grunt from the back of the room and she froze.

I turned to see one of Gwen's new investors, Boris, practically leering at Rose; I swear if we were not here he'd be rubbing one off. I grabbed Gwen to speak with her privately in the other room. "Gwen if you want these pictures you have to get that guy out if here. He's making Rose uncomfortable and this would be a complete waste of time and money."

"I don't even know him but someone told me to approach him since he's looking to invest his money," Gwen admitted.

"Listen, I hate to put you in a bind and I don't want to over step my boundaries but if we don't get him out of here now, Rose will have a full fledge panic attack. Sorry, her mental state is more important," I said.

"No, Bella you're right. God, I'm so mortified right now! I promised Rose nothing like this would happen," she said remorsefully. "Okay just do what you can, focus on the garments Alice and I put together."

"Will do, please just get him out of here along with everyone else. Alice and I can handle the rest," I said.

We headed back to the studio we saw Alice stand protectively in front of Rose as the investor guy stood closer than when we left the room. "Okay there has been a change in plan, we only need Camille, to stay otherwise I have to ask everyone to leave," I called out. At first no one moved, a few people smirked and continued on with their conversation as though I hadn't spoken. "Okay that was me being polite, now I just need everyone to get out," I said loudly and started shooing people out. Gwen along with her business partner went to speak with Boris and eventually got him to leave the room.

"Thank you," Rose murmured once the room was cleared out.

"You're welcome I just want you to be okay," I said. "Here's the plan we have a few more swimsuits Gwen wants us to shoot for potential add campaign as well as a few dresses. Let's get through this as quickly as possible."

We had no choice but to move quickly cause Rose and Alice had band rehearsal for the show in a couple of days. Since our 'tourist' day Edward and I haven't had any time to ourselves, he's been preparing for the show not only with the band but he planned to perform with other people.

But busy is what I needed. I've texted and called Jenks so often she resorted to sending a strongly worded text not to bother her while she worked. In all honesty, I just wanted to help in the investigation.

I needed to know why parents had this jewelry box filled with enough jewels worth more than a small third world country. The bigger question is how they obtain this box, was it stolen? Was it given to them? And if so, by whom?

I tugged at the gold locket that held a photo of me and my parents, the one thing I couldn't leave in Seattle with the other items. It was like the missing link to my family. Even though I had Jake and was taken into the Cullen family, I needed that connection to people whose blood ran through my veins.

"Bella, we're ready," Alice said interrupting my mental list.

I grabbed my camera from the work station. "Great Ace, let's get this show on the road," I said.

oOo

We were able to photograph five different outfits within two hours. Between Alice and Camille the hair and makeup took less time than expected, the notes I took during my meetings with Gwen paid off because I felt as though I was able to capture the look and vibe she was going for.

"Bella are you sure you don't want to come to rehearsal with us?" Alice asked.

I shook my head. "No I need to go through the frames before I present to Gwen in the morning and then head over to assist Zach with the St. John photo shoot," I said distractedly.

Zach has been a godsend introducing me to his equipment suppliers, his favorite makeup artist and hairstylist, like Camille, so there was no way I was going to let him down tomorrow.

"I don't know Bellini, I think Edward will have an aneurism if we show up without you," Rose said.

I sighed. "He'll get over it," I muttered.

"Come on Bells you can just work while we rehearse," Alice interjected.

"I tried to get stuff down yesterday but only came out with a headache. Seriously you guys, go on, it shouldn't take me too long to finish up and I will meet up with everyone for dinner," I reasoned. "I'll even wear heels if that will make you happy." Ace and Rose remained silent but shared a look and I knew they spoke with Edward. "Ohmigod is this about what happened on the subway?"

"Bella you're not worried?"

I thought about my first day in New York when I thought I saw Laurent, he use to be a close friend of James but I hadn't seen him in about a year. I figured they met up in either Port Angeles or Seattle and quite honestly I didn't care. It was one less person I had to worry about. "No I'm not worried. This building has round the clock security and I plan to hop in cab once I leave here," I explained.

"The paparazzi have been lurking," Alice equipped.

I chuckled. "I'm not worried about that, once they see you two exit the building they'll follow you and leave me alone," I reminded them with a wink.

"Yeah that's what you said the day of the sentencing," Rose chirped as she put on her leather jacket.

I rolled my eyes and turned back to the computer. "That was a different set of circumstances," I said drily. "Now please get out of here so I can work in peace."

"Fine, we're going but if Edward interrupts rehearsal cause he's texting you then you will have to pay for dinner," Alice said from the doorway. "And you better pray Edward stays focused."

"Yeah, why is that?"

"Because Emmett's back and he's always super hungry after a long flight," she said saucily and walked out the door. Emmett had been in Los Angeles since the day after Thanksgiving working on something outside the band but no one is sure what it is. Either way, it was hush-hush. I was too mentally exhausted to decipher his 'Don'tworryitslegalandclothingisoptional!' comment.

Once they were gone, I put on my Pandora station and random songs by The Yeah, Yeah, Yeah's, Pheonix 1901, Jay-Z, Beyonce, and Lady Gaga filled the room. As I stared at each photo, I knew immediately the first fifty were utter crap, Rose looked stiff and frightened. After an hour I touched up a total of ten photos but Gwen had so many she could choose from and my absolute favorites did not require any work at all.

I quickly packed up my gear, took a look around the room to make sure everything was in its place, and turned out the lights. When I stepped onto the elevator I chose the play list Edward artfully called 'Bella has PMS & moody List' which housed songs from Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Taylor Swift, Beyoncé, Kelly Clarkson, Miley Cyrus, Black Eyed Peas and Alanis Morissette.

I waved good night to the guard and started walking the three blocks toward the Duane Reed on 57th Avenue. Thanks to a stressful day and pms, I had a strong craving for peanut butter M&M's and a Mountain Dew and knew I there were plenty of cabs along that street.

The studio I worked in today was located in the Meat Packing District it was a nice mix of fashion houses like Diane von Furstenberg and St. John as well as studios photographers use.

Even though the sun had set hours ago, I did not feel unsafe walking down the street alone. I took a chance and sung out loud to Black Eye Peas 'I gotta feeling' and half way through the song when I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stood and knew I was being watched.

It wasn't that feeling I get when there's paparazzi around. This was that weird unknown feeling. My stomach suddenly felt as though there was a brick weighing me down. Unfortunately, it was a familiar feeling I sometimes got when I lived in Forks and believed James was watching me to make sure I didn't go to the hospital or Jake's.

I quickly turned off my iPod but kept my ear bud in to give the illusion I was still listening to the music and picked up my pace. It didn't take long to hear the footfalls behind me, whoever this person was easily kept up with my stride, I feared if I tried to run they'd catch me.

Out of irrational fear I refused to look back, my goal was to get to the store where I'd be surrounded by people. With my goal insight I started to walk faster, a moment later I heard the footfalls speed up. When I was a block away I heard someone say "Excuse me, Miss?" I refused to slow down. When I reached 57th, I jay walked across the street and quickly went inside the Duane Reed. I stayed in aisles where there were two or more people.

And then I heard it again, "Excuse me, Miss?" I looked up to see a guy in his mid to late thirties with shaggy sandy blonde hair and his eyes reminded me of aged whiskey. ThismanwasdefinitelynotLaurent. "Um, you dropped this," he said and held up my favorite multi-color gloves that Esme bought me while I was in Seattle.

I doubled checked my bag and sure enough my gloves were missing. "Oh, thank you!" I said.

"You're welcome, my daughter always losses hers," he explained. Even though he seemed okay something was off about the situation.

"Well thank you," I said and moved past him.

"You know this isn't a safe area to be walking alone in," he advised. "Especially, if you're unfamiliar with the area."

With much bravado, I smirked. "I can take care of myself," I said, brushed pass him and walked out the store. I hopped into the nearest cab, and felt instantly better knowing I was putting distance between me and the blond stranger. I suddenly felt my phone vibrate and noticed I missed a call from Edward and he was calling back.

With shaking hands I answered the phone. "Hi honey."

"Hi babe, are you still at the studio?" he asked.

"No, I'm on my way to the hotel."

"Ok good, we're almost done here so I'll meet you at the hotel and then we'll go to dinner."

"Sounds good see you there," I replied.

"Love you, see you in a bit."

"Love you too," I said and hung up the phone. I didn't want to get into this kind of discussion with Edward over the phone, but it was something I definitely could not hide from him.

My thoughts kept going back to the man in the store, especially his warning about it not being safe to walk the streets. How did he know I wasn't from New York? I didn't think I stood out that much and I know I've never seen him before he definitely wasn't an associate of James he never came to the house. I was so wrapped in my thoughts I didn't realize we arrived at the hotel until door man opened my door. I paid the driver and quickly went upstairs.

I suddenly felt tired and weighed down, as soon as I walked into the suite, I stripped down to my underwear, and went into the bathroom to run a bubble bath. Since I had a little time before Edward arrived, I decided a soak in the tub was definitely required. I went to the mini bar and found a bottle of Riesling chilling. Perfect!

I poured a small glass, knew it was a mistake but I guzzled a glass and then poured another. By the time I returned back to the bathroom the tub was filled. There was a small radio and I found a classical music station. It wasn't my usual forte but I needed something relaxing. I placed my phone a safe distance away yet reachable distance from the tub and immersed my body into the water.

Between the wine, music and warm water my eyes began to droop. Aquicknapwon'thurt.

"Babe," I heard Edward whisper. I opened my eyes and found Edward shirtless sitting on the edge of the tub. "Hey sleepy head."

"Hi," I said and leaned to give him a kiss. "How long have you been here?"

"Not too long, I found the open bottle and figured you were in the tub," he said. "Rough day?"

I sighed. "Overall it was ok, nothing too strenuous. A handsy investor but we took care of it," I said. I took a deep breath and knew this next part may set him off. "It was after that has me a little freaked out."

As predicted Edward was on alert, his entire body tensed up. "What happened?" he asked.

I watched as he paced the bathroom as I told him about how the street was pretty much deserted and noticed someone following me until I ran into the nearby store. "Dammit Bella I thought you were taking a cab! Why the hell were you walking down the street like that?" he asked. I could tell he was getting agitated.

"I wanted M&M's!" I fumed. It wasn't the best argument but it I was in dire need of chocolate and I he didn't seem to understand this desire.

He stared at me for a minute. "You wanted M&M's?" he asked calmly.

"Yes," I said with a sigh. "Babe, I have some serious PMS going on and needed chocolate."

He took a deep breathe and sighed. "You and your chocolate," he said with a chuckled and leaned over and kissed me on the lips. All traces of laughter left his face as he caressed my face. "You're sure this guy wasn't that Laurel guy?"

"Laurent," I corrected. "And I'm positive it wasn't him."

Edward nodded. "I guess it's a good thing Sam is coming tonight."

This was news to me. "Why is Sam coming?"

"Mike wanted more security since we're participating in the concert and hired him to come out early with his team," he explained. "And as more artists arrive the paparazzi have been around so people know where we're staying." Ohthejoysofdatingacelebrity. "Maybe we should hire him for you permanently."

I shook my head. "No Edward! Think about it, Emmett has been working with me with self-defense moves and boxing, I carry pepper spray and I promise you if its dark I will make sure a cab is nearby – pms'ing or not."

Edward smirked and then his face became very serious. "Please Bella, be more aware of your surroundings," he said quietly. "I constantly fight this irrational need to protect you from any and everything but I know that's not what you need. I know you need to find your own way, as cliché as it sounds, spreadyourwings. But… in order for me be rational when it comes to your safety, I need you to meet me half way."

Edward looked at me with pleading eyes but I knew he was right. I knew he could be overprotective but he's given me room to breathe. Even at my worst he constantly gave me the emotional support I needed and never ask for anything in return. "I promise," I said quietly.

"Thank you," he said and gave me a kiss on the forehead. "Is there any room in there for me?"

"I think we can squeeze you in here."

I watched Edward as he took off his jeans, as much I loved looking at his abs there was something about his long legs I could not get enough of his thighs, they were lean yet muscular. Thanks to Emmett and his exercise regiment, which included squats he had a nice ass.

I scooted up so he could sit behind me and once he was settled I leaned against him. Edward wrapped his arms around me and we just enjoyed the moment of being together. We talked about our day; he said the rehearsals went smoothly now that Emmett had returned.

"In fact while he was in LA he figured out what was missing for the new song."

"Which song?" I asked because I knew Edward and Jasper wrote several songs during Thanksgiving but had yet to hear any of it the new music.

"Right now it's titled 'Weak' but Alice hates the title."

"Why?"

"She thinks the title is misleading because it's a song about people perceiving you to be weak when in actually you're stronger than you look," he said. "It's a song telling people like Jane and James that they can't push people around. Think on the lines of an anthem but louder."

We sat in silence as I digested his description of the new song, it reminded me of when we were in LA and he met Stacey for the first time. He was seeing the world differently and using his voice to be heard. "Lyrically, we all agreed but the sound was off, Emmett realized we needed more guitars," he said continued.

"You and Emmett aren't enough on the guitar?" I asked jokingly but I was still digesting his description of the new song.

Edward chuckled as well. "No, it needs to be loud, so Alice will have to brush up on her guitar playing as well as brining in a session player. But we have two days to get it right if we want to play it at the concert."

"Can you do that with no CD?"

"Yes, just means we have to get our asses in gear," he said softly. "And it means it will be the start of time apart." Just hearing his say those words, it felt as though someone was squeezing my heart and I was waiting for it to restart.

In theory, I was ready for us to occasionally have time apart but the reality is I was far from prepared. Ijustgothimback! "Hey, it's going to kill me when that time comes but we'll be ok."

I couldn't reply, I simply nodded my head and Edward held me tighter. I knew this pain was partly due to the fucking pms that plagued me but I knew when he left that crazy emptiness would engulf me but much worse than last time. "Don't mind me. Logically, I know I'm just being a girl. So, blame the pms," I said softly.

Edward remained silent then I felt him lean forward and kissed my shoulder, I had to turn slightly to get a good look at him. "It's not going to be like last time. When I left last time…I…it was as if I died. I went through the motions of the life I created but I didn't begin to live until I kissed you again. For the first time in years, I felt my heart pound in my chest," he said. "And let's face it I'm a greedy mutherfucker and I love this feeling. And I can only obtain this feeling with you. You make my heart race, Bella."

I left his words sink in and like a fucking girl I started to cry silent tears. I had no words because they were exactly how I felt. I turned until I straddled his lap and kissed him.

I realized something… sometimes words are not required.

oOo

The day before the show I was utterly drained. Both Zack and Gwen were demanding in their own way and when I was done with them I had to photograph the band during rehearsal and recording. A few months ago, when Alice said it was a lot of work, she didn't lie and I would never complain. I was just too damn happy to complain even though I was exhausted.

When I woke up I was surprised to see I slept well pass noon. The last thing I remembered was Edward kissing me good morning then heading to the shower. Today, I knew the first round of sound checking was taking place at Madison Square Garden after a few radio interviews.

I checked my phone and saw Edward sent a text about catching a late lunch. So, I reluctantly got out of bed and took a long hot shower. Took my time to blow dry my hair and even put on a little make-up. Once I was satisfied, I threw on a pair of jeans with a black lightweight v-neck sweater and flat black lace-up boots. I tensed up when I suddenly heard a noise from the other room, but instantly relaxed when I heard Edward humming.

"Hey Gorgeous," he said when he walked into the bedroom.

"Hi yourself," I said and stepped into his arms. And just like that all thoughts of exhaustion left my mind, even though we were completely alone we always create a little bubble. I groaned a little when Edward ended the kiss. "How did sound check go?"

Edward remained silent but I noticed his gaze on my lips. I slowly licked my bottom lip and I heard him groan then he crashed him mouth against mines once again and much to quickly the kiss was over. "Sound check went ok," Edward replied softly. "Are you ready?"

I nodded. "Yeah," I replied. Edward came behind me to help me into my red cashmere coat and I grabbed my Coach pouch.

It took less than five minutes to get to the lobby and that's when I began to hear the whispers. I looked around to see several people watch us as we walked through the lobby. My initial reaction would be to hide my face in Edward's side but if we're really going to build a future the stares came with the territory. Instead, I took a deep breathe, stood straighter and kept my gaze on the exit. But the stares in the lobby were just the beginning, by the time we were outside there were several photographers snapping to get a photo. Edward squeezed my hand then guided me to an awaiting cab. I didn't relax until the taxi pulled away from the hotel.

"Sorry about that," Edward said.

I shrugged. "It's no biggie, I'm actually getting used to it," I replied with a small grin. I don't think I will ever be totally comfortable with the paparazzi but I will endure. "Speaking of the paparazzi, where is Sam?"

"Told him to take the rest of the day off, tomorrow will be insane," Edward explained.

The taxi dropped us off in an older neighborhood not too far from our hotel. The Italian restaurant seems to be a staple in the neighborhood. I felt as though I was warped back into time somewhere in Sicily. The red and white checker tablecloths, with a single red carnation as a center piece gave the place an old school vibe. And the Italian opera blaring through the speakers made you forget you were in New York.

We fell into a silence as we looked over the menu. I nearly threw my hands up in frustration when I couldn't choose between the potato gnocchi and the seafood risotto. Edward suggested I order both so we could share because he too was having trouble deciding between the chicken calzone and the lasagna.

I went into complete mother hen mode when he told me about Seth's panic attack during sound check. "Edward, you can't keep that from me? I'm responsible for him."

"Babe, he's eighteen so that makes him an adult. And it was more like a freak out than a true panic attack. He simply realized he was playing at Madison Square Garden – it happens everyone who plays that stage," Edward replied nonchalantly.

Edward hired Seth as the session player for the new song after hearing him play at Thanksgiving. Both he and Jasper were impressed and knew they wanted to hire him for future projects or at least help him get work as a guitarist. As Jasper would say "His talent should be shared with the world."

"Eighteen or not, if something happens to him, Leah will be on my ass like white on rice," I stated.

Edward chuckled. "White on rice? Have you been chatting with Jenks?" he asked.

I grinned. "Sadly, no, she's out of the country. I actually heard it from Avery," I said and thought about my divorce attorney and his odd and sometimes inappropriate one-liners. "So you think Seth will be ok?"

"Seth is going to be fine, I promise."

I cocked an eyebrow. "He better," I said seriously. "Or you'll have to deal with Leah and let me tell you that's a scary bitch."

He sighed dramatically. "I forgot about her."

We looked at each other and started laughing because we both knew Leah would go ape shit if something happened to her brother. It was simply a pleasant afternoon considering we've been busy non-stop since we arrived in town and I was anxious for the concert to be over because that meant Edward and I would be alone.

After lunch we decided to walk around Central Park, it had been snowing the last few days but coming from Forks it was perfectly normal to walk around in weather like this. But I had to admit it was colder than what I was use to, even with the heavy cashmere coat and scarf I was still chilled to the bone.

We walked to a cobblestone bridge over looking a pond, I could not contain my smile when I saw the ducks. The melting snow on the leafless tree branches made this a picture perfect moment. "You know what's missing?" I asked.

He chuckled. "What's missing?" Edward asked.

"Bread to feed the ducks!"

He laughed as he came up behind me and gathered me in his arms. "Next time," he promised. I shivered when Edward's hands touched mine because we were both gloveless. And the cold temperatures made his calloused fingertips rougher than usual. I took both his hands in mine and tried to rub some warmth back into them.

I heard him chuckle in my ear. "What are you doing?"

"Trying to warm you up."

"Sweetie, that is not the way to warm me up?"

"I would love to warm you up the other way but you keep saying no," I retorted.

"Touché," he said with another chuckle. "But if you keep this up you will chafe my hand."

"Sorry, I don't keep lube on me," I said. "I'm usually always moist."

He groaned in my neck. "So wrong."

I just laughed and eased up on the rubbing, I just needed the skin on skin contact. When I looked down the E+B tattoo was visible, my heart clutched just a little bit and then I was suddenly inspired.

"Edward," I murmured softly as the idea seemed to take over my brain.

"Yeah?"

I turned around so I was facing him. "If I say I wanted to do something out of the ordinary would you trust me?"

With no hesitation he replied, "I trust you." All I could do was smile and give him a quick kiss before I grabbed his hand to find the nearest cab.

Thirty minutes later we stared at the sign, both reluctant to move from where the cab dropped us off.

"So," he started, he frowned, shook he head as if to clear the cobwebs then looked at me. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, remember that day we had that talk in the tub?"

His frown deepened. "Yeah…"

I grabbed his hand. "I didn't come alive until you returned, finding the courage to leave was because of you and I want to… get that symbolized," said truthfully.

He looked at the sign on the door and then back at me. "With a tattoo?"

"Yes."

"Okay, then let's do it," he said as he held his hand out his hand and led us into the tattoo shop.

The shop was busy, as though instead of going to a bar after work people stopped in here instead. A burly guy with a lip piercing and tattoos on his hand and neck asked if we needed help.

"Yes, could we talk to an artist about getting a tattoo today?" Edward asked.

"Do you have a design in mind?" the burly man asked.

"Yes," I said. "Do you have a pen and paper?"

He nodded. "Of course. I'm Jonah, if you have any questions let me know," he said as he reached under the counter and brought out a sketch book and pencil for me.

"This is a spur of the moment idea so getting an artist today won't be a problem right?" I asked.

"No problem," he assured me.

"Thank you," I said. I took a deep breathe and started drawing. After a few tries, I finally got it just right and handed the book to Edward. I wasn't the best artist but this was simple yet significant. "What do you think?"

Edward looked at the drawing, his face reminded me of a blank canvas just completely void of any emotion. It wasn't until he took a deep breathe I saw his Adam's apple move. "I love it," he said quietly. "This sums it up perfectly."

We walked the book back up to the counter where Jonah was waiting. "Do you think you can tattoo this on my wrist?" I asked.

Jonah looked at my drawing. "Yeah shouldn't take no more than thirty minutes," he assured me.

"Actually, we both are getting the same design," Edward said suddenly. "Will that cause a problem?"

Jonah smiled and shook his head as he walked us over to a station in the back. Thankfully, no one paid attention to Edward as we took off out jackets and got settled. Jonah came because with a trace of my drawing and placed it on my wrist, after confirming everything was okay, he began to prep my arm.

A sudden buzzing noise brought me out if my stupor. I zoned out completely because one minute Jonah was shaving my wrist and now he held a tattoo gun in his hands. I flinched when the needled touched my skin. Admittedly, it hurt like a mutherfucker but James had broken this wrist twice before, so the needle was much easier to take than it breaking.

As predicted, Jonah was done thirty minutes later. He cleaned off the excess ink and there it was my first tattoo. A heart rate showing the beats then in the middle, a heart to signify our love and then it goes back into a heartbeat. Edward came over to examine the tattoo, he never formalized words. He simply nodded and kissed the top of my head.

We were alive again.