I'm not sure how Itachi felt about the change in our relationship (if you can even call how we interacted a relationship) but I, for one, was thrilled.

The head scratching...no, hair stroking...wait, maybe weasel relaxing...whatever you want to call it, gave me an ace in the hole. Prior to my discovery of Itachi's love of affection, I had done anything and everything to avoid pissing off my partner. If he somehow managed to become enraged anyway, I tried to avoid him for a few hours or days. Possibly weeks, if the Uchiha was in a really bad funk. But my discovery altered things.

Whenever Itachi became upset now, I could approach him with a fair certainty that I wasn't going to be brutally slaughtered as long as I sat in silence while playing with his hair. The little weasel loved it, although there's little doubt in my mind that he'd sooner die than admit to that. He'd just lie there quietly, eyes shut as his body curled up into a little ball. It was adorable, really.

Please don't tell him I said that.

The point was that I no longer lived in overwhelming fear of Itachi (the fear was still there though. I was happy, not stupid.) It turned out that my fears were well founded.

One night, Itachi had gotten unusually upset about something, and silently fumed about it in the bedroom. What the something was, I don't know. Maybe Deidara pestered him for too long, maybe he was forced to spend time with Tobi, maybe someone breathed in his general direction, the possibilities really are endless. Well, me being the thoughtful shark I am, I decided that he needed a bit of TLC, and proceeded to sit beside him on our shared mattress and play with his hair. Nothing out of the ordinary so far.

Itachi relaxed under my fingertips, his eyes drooping shut as he curled up on the bed. I grinned inwardly; this was one of those rare moments where I actually felt like I had some sort of control over the Uchiha. Itachi would probably set the record straight with a lot of big words and then castrate me just to make a point if I ever told him that, but still, it doesn't change how I felt.

While I'd been pondering the weasel ripping off my nether regions, Itachi had fallen asleep. This was a surprise. Never, since we'd begun our partnership, had the man drifted off into dream land without first making sure that I was going to be on guard while he slept. So, either the weasel trusted me to watch him without being instructed to do so, or he had gotten careless.

I honestly couldn't say which option was less likely.

So, having a thoroughly relaxed and unconscious homicidal sadist resting beneath my fingertips, I did what any shark would do; I got stupid.

See, I know that Itachi takes great care in primping and whatnot. His hair isn't the only thing the weasel frets over; he needs to have this kind of body wash or that brand of bar soap, and he'll always require at least an hour in the shower. I've met women that go to fewer pains than he.

Seriously, please don't let Itachi know I'm telling you this. I like having my insides on the inside. Really, I do.

Ok, back to the point. I knew that Itachi spent a lot of time on his appearance; so, what were the results? Obviously I could see the flawlessness of my partner's body, but I also wanted to feel it with my own hands.

And so, listening to the voice in my head that told me that poking a deranged, murderous, and temperamental weasel was a good idea, I ran my finger across Itachi's cheek.

My eyes widened at the texture. Itachi's skin was perfect. I couldn't find a single imperfection with my fingertips, and his cheek felt unbelievably smooth. Now, what follows stupidity? Right, more stupidity. I chose to push my luck.

Slowly, gingerly, my fingers slid across his face to his lips. Even these were perfect; not cracked or anything, like you'd expect. Maybe he used chap stick or something-

I was abruptly informed that my number was up when Itachi harshly bit down on my finger.

To say that I screamed would be the equivalent of saying that provoking my sleeping partner was only mildly stupid. In any case, I managed to jerk my hand free of my partner's mouth before he bit my finger off, and scrambled to the other side of the bed as fast as I could.

Acting as though he hadn't attempted to mutilate me, Itachi sat up and looked at me with mild disinterest. "What were you doing?"

"I was just playing with your hair, and then you bit me!"

He didn't look convinced. "If you were playing with my hair, why was your hand near my mouth?"

"Because I was...erm..." Shit, I was dead. "Well, your skin was soft, and I wasn't really thinking about it..." Oh sure, go right ahead and dig your grave that much deeper, Kisame. Really, it's a miracle Itachi hasn't killed me yet.

Fortunately I escaped death once again. Itachi did not violently murder me for touching his face; instead, he just gave me a strange look. Like he was surprised and maybe...satisfied? No, that couldn't be it. Could it?

I watched quietly as the Uchiha climbed off the bed and walked into our shared bathroom. When he returned a few minutes later, he was carrying a first-aid kit under his arm. "Here," he said as he handed it over to me. Oh right. I was still bleeding.

A bit of quick doctoring soon took care of that, but I was still miffed. Itachi seemed to notice this, and frowned. The weasel then proceeded to sit down by me on the bed, looking intently at my damaged digit all the while. "Is it really that bad?"

"Yes," I snapped. That was a lie, but I was beyond annoyed with my partner by then.

Itachi looked at my hand for a few more brief moments, before actually grasping the limb with his slim fingers. He seemed to hesitate for a second, before bringing the finger to his lips and kissing it.

Itachi kissed my finger. Itachi, a twisted little sadistic weasel, who has NEVER shown me so much as a happy smile or spared me a kind word, kissed my wounded finger.

It's amazing I didn't faint. I mean-!...oh, never mind.

While I was still staring at my hand in disbelief, Itachi stood and walked around the mattress to get to his side of the bed. "Wake me in a few hours when it's my turn to watch," he instructed. And then he just crawled under the covers and went to sleep, like it was no big deal!

For the first time in a long while, I was grateful to be on watch duty. There was no way in hell I was getting any sleep that night. Not when all I could think about was how soft Itachi's lips felt against my hand-I mean…damnit, I can't get a break.