Chapter XII
Forever and Always Nicklaus

Klaus thinks that I should become the thing that hurt the Doctor to start with. I am not sure why though it is me, I am the ripper and I know that. I have always been a ripper I just try to push it back to control it. It has control over me not I have control over it. I need to forget the past, just forget the past. The past left you with that letter you left in the TARDIS. I closed the blue book I was writing in. "Jason how long do you think it is going to take me to shut out the past and emotions?"

"I don't know, a week couple days, But why are you doing this Kat?" he sat by a tree.

"Because I owe this to Klaus, I want to do this." I looked at the blue book it looked like the TARDIS. "I need to go hunt let me take you back to the Mansion."

"No I will walk it's not far, where are you going this time?" I looked at him.

"Where ever Klaus is." He let out a growl.

"You have got to be kidding me Katerina!" he pushed me up against the tree behind me. "Turn it off, Katerina you don't care for him."

I vamped out showing my glossy black eyes, "Is this why you are staying with me, because you think I care for Klaus? I do and you can't stop me Jason. My world is collapsing and he has been there for me not you Nicklaus."

"Maybe that's why the doctor left, because he knew he couldn't fight for your love any longer."

"You don't know why he left, and neither do I he always leaves. I thought you would know that by now." I started to cry sliding down the trunk of the tree. Jason put his hand on my shoulder I pushed it off.

"Tardis, I am sorry. Sis please listen to me I am sorry." I ran off turning in to my wolf. I was fighting my memories, trying to push them back. I started to bite the wind and growl at the trees.

I shut it off, I shut off the pain, the emotions, I'll I felt was anger, rage, and the hunger for blood. The perfect ripper Katerina Tardis Karr, a ripper that who couldn't change anything ever again; hunters were looking for deer and came across me, I bit into the hunter the blood touched my lips I feed hard and fast. Blacking out on the first kill.

(Doctor's View)

"Doctor what's this?" Clara was holding a paper.

"I am not sure can you give it to me." I asked nicely, trying not to show my sadness.

"Yes, I am not sure who it is for, but I thought I would tell you." She set it on the consul next to me. I opened the paper; it was Tardis' hand writing. "what does it say?"

"It says: Dear whoever might find this,

I was moving on trying to find my real place among the earth as a wolf I am not sure yet. I plan on traveling far and wide for my family, and for my home. I will love as once before if I can shut all the memories of the doctor out of my mind then I will find love. If not well I am forgotten and I will shut my emotions off, my humanity. What Klaus wants the perfect ripper not just any old ripper one who can't stop who blacks out but still feeds. I will try hard as my feet begin to bleed I will continue walking until I fall to the ground alone and dead.

I sit here in the fog and the moon light. There was a new werewolf out there not knowing what is happening to them, the pain and agony of the wolf ripping its way out. The vampires broad their windows scared of the werewolves why wouldn't they be, maybe they don't and they are killed. Most people write their thoughts down, their hopes and dreams, wish upon a star wait to be forgiven to be given love. I know it comes true but it always ends.

If you try your hardest it might come true, but there are no happy endings. I have tried to get my happy ending, look at me now I am in the woods waiting for my world to come crashing down. I am a Time Lord I am not from earth and I am a monster I kill people to live. If you are reading this then well I left the Doctor and he is off in a cloud waiting for me to come beg him to take me back.

Katerina Tardis Karr." I sighed as I read the last words. "That was my wife, she is gone now."

"Doctor I am so sorry I didn't know you had a wife, at all did she leave you?"

"You could say that, last time I saw her she was running off into the woods as a wolf." A picture of her fell out of the paper. It was the night we first met, at her birthday party. "I still love you." I whispered to myself, rubbing my finger on the picture.

(Tardis' view)

I looked up at the sky, "ok that's new." I was in the plains of the United States; I must have ran a long ways. I looked down at my red covered fur. "I need to wash again. So what I do and what do I not?" That was the question what do I do now I left the doctor so I wouldn't hurt him. I left Klaus because he made me into a monster, no idea what happened to jack. I was alone in the plains and free of the men who crowded my mind.

I shut my mind off, biting into the flesh of another human. "That's better." I started towards a house; I placed myself on their front porch licking my fur clean. I haven't been I my human form for a couple of weeks. I couldn't control the crying if I turned back. I started to head back to Klaus' house.

* Back at Klaus' House*

There was a note on the door for me:
Tardis
My sweet Tardis,
I promised myself to forget your name
your wonderful hair. Your shining gold eyes
your smile charming Smile. I still can see it in my dreams.
Many, many years ago, when I saw last time… I thought that
my life was broken in a billion pieces.
I thought it was my destiny to be lonely, be selfish, and heartless.
But you my dear, you taught me how to feel again.
You should me that I'm able to love.
I was hiding for all those years. But I can't do it anymore.
This letter I wrote to tell that... I love you Tardis
I love you like nobody else.
I know where you are. You still have to leave that place
if you don't feel the same.
But if you feel... Just wait for me... I'll be here soon…
Doctor.

I threw the paper on the ground; I wasn't ready to see him not like this. I left a note on the door for him:
Doctor
if you are reading this it means I have shut everything off to not to hurt you but to protect myself. I wish I didn't have to tell you good bye like this I just couldn't face you both. Don't try to find I am not going anywhere important I just want my love to be true to both of you and in this sate I am neither true nor human. I have loved you both and I wish I could love you both again. I tried so hard to keep it in control and both I and you doctor. Those nights it was raining and I tried to leave, you both kissed me in the rain, and I fell for you both.
Tardis

I sat on the porch crying trying not to lose it, I saw Klaus car pull up on the drive way, I knew I could look him in the eye and tell him I love him. I walked to his car. "Katerina, I didn't expect you to be home so early."

I smiled hugging him, "Don't let me leave ever again."

He nodded, lifting me off my feet, "Mrs. Michaelson, I will never leave you. I promise." He said walking in the door of our house. He set me down softly.

I backed up slowly, pulling on his tie to make him follow me.

*The following day*

"You do know that I am breaking my brother's code." He looked at me.

"I know," I put on his shirt walking to the bathroom, "I am cheating on Damon if that makes you feel any better, Nicklaus." My accent was strong around him.

"Yes, yes it makes me feel a lot better." He was stilling lying in bed, his tattoo on his shoulder showing.

"I want to cut my hair if that's ok with you love." I got dressed faster than normal.

"As long as you're happy I am happy." He looked at me, I blinked and he was behind me, "Do you need help with the strings?"

I nodded, taking in a large breath. His fingers were soft, touching the back of my neck. He leaned down kissing the scar running down my back. I let my hair fall over the scar turning around.

"I am sorry I didn't mean to bring back that memory." He was concerned.

I smiled, "That's just the past and I need to get over this old scar that has been haunting me my entire life."

He kissed the top of my head; he pulled his shirt on over his head. I walked out to stand in the sun to feel the warmth on my face. I took a hold of my necklace, holding the stone that allowed me to walk in the sun. I pulled it off my neck, holding it in my hand I slowly let my hand open, turning to the side. I watched the stone hit the ground.

The sun was powerful; the agony of the sun burning my skin, Klaus pulled me back into the house letting me heal. "What were you thinking Tardis you could have killed yourself?!" He was mad at me.

I looked away, trying to hide my emotions from him. The tears rolled down my cheeks. I was hurt still the note that the doctor gave me. The note was in my hand, I gave it to Klaus. "This is my reason Klaus, for everything. I can't go back to him."

He looked at the tear stained paper, "I don't understand why this is the reason of you trying to kill yourself?"

"If you knew what a time lord's pain really felt like you would know why we do things that humans don't." I looked at him, "I am hybrid Klaus I can't be killed, I am also a time lord, my heart break is worse." I took his hand pressing it against my right side of my chest.

He took a step back in shock, "You have two hearts."

"There is a saying in my kind, Time lords Have double the love and double the heart break." I looked at him; I stood walking over to him.

"But it isn't possible you're not human. You are something else, what are you?!" His eyes flashed gold as I continued walking towards him.

"I am who you think I am Nicklaus, I am a time lord, I have two hearts, and I am scared." I looked at him scared.

"Hey I am sorry I didn't know," He pulled me into his arms.

I looked up into his blue eyes; I rested my head on his chest. "I will love you forever, Klaus." I smiled. I heard a terrible noise across town. "He's here I am not spouse to be here."

"What do you mean you're not spouse to be here? Who is here?"

I jumped up, Klaus' hand still in mine. "The doctor read the last part of the note."

"You didn't wait for him did you?" He looked at me releasing my hand.

"I stayed for you only you Klaus, you are the one I love Klaus, I love him, but we never had a connection like you and I have Klaus." I pulled him up, kissing him. "We are real; my feelings for you are real Klaus."

I looked around panicked. "Please don't go with him," Klaus plead with everything he had.

"I won't I just need to get out of this town for a little bit, I'll come back I promise."