Author's notes:

Thank you so much, dear readers, for your kind words! They truly flatter me, and I'm glad you're enjoying the story. I'm always very grateful for your comments, and also, feel free to point out any grammar and spelling oddities!

This chapter is a loooong one... but I really enjoyed writing it, it's one of my favorites so far, to be honest... and I hope you'll enjoy reading it just as much. This is also the last of the episodes that are set in the past, and from the next chapter on, we're back in the present! You might see a couple hints in this chapter that the level of angst is steadily increasing, and things aren't just as fluffy all the time...

Anyway, so let's get on with the story!

–––

Sometimes, Sophie mused, Howl's predictions at his wedding proposal weren't far from the truth. He wasn't always an easy man to live with.

Sure, he always had enough charm to melt her, most often even when she was in the foulest of moods. When sharing their moments as husband and wife, there was always a lot of passion between them… oh, just the mere thought of it made her blush… but foremost, Howl had a great need of intimacy… closeness… sometimes reminding her of a loved starved child. Still not quite comfortable during the darkest hours of the night, he would often ask her to hold him in her arms until he fell asleep. On several other occasions she'd woken up, feeling all out of breath, her head deeply buried in the pillow… only to find him sprawled across her back, clinging to her in his sleep.

However… no, she didn't want to call him immature, as little as she wanted to change him… but there were still areas of his personality that, well, might be in need of some work. She knew he was trying hard to better his ways, but it wasn't always a straight road. Every time he'd face a somewhat uncomfortable situation, part of him instinctively tried to escape. Usually, though, all it took was a bit of encouragement (or sometimes a sharp look) from her to make him stand up for himself.

If he found something to be particularly dull or not in need of immediate attention (which was the case with most of the household chores, in his opinion), his attention span was usually very short, and he was easily distracted. However, as he got caught up in something himself (most often the invention of a more or less useful spell, or sometimes, just an interesting book), he often got so immersed that he forgot about everything; the time and his physical needs as well as everyone around him. Sophie had learned that though he usually did complete any task or favor asked from him, his definition of "right away" rarely complied with hers.

She had become very well aware of that physically, Howl wouldn't be very strong if stripped of his magical powers. Even though he'd put on a little bit of weight since Sophie's arrival, he was still almost too thin for his own good. Considering his sometimes self-detached behavior, the combination was far from ideal. As Sophie first had come to live with them, Markl had told her that Howl didn't eat much, and for the most part, he slept even less. But the fact was–he did need at least four steady meals per day and a good night's sleep to keep up with his hard working schedule. Despite Sophie's ministrations, he often forgot about eating, and furthermore, he seldom realized the exhaustion and temper tantrums that followed had anything to do with the fact that he was famished.

Had he been going without nourishment for too long, he always lost his appetite, complaining about headache and nausea as Sophie tried to coax him into eating. As soon as she'd made him take anything, he always felt much better, but this scenario was repeating itself over and over again. Maybe part of it was due to his constant need of attention, but he just never seemed to learn.

One day, when Howl was out on his usual business, Prince Justin of Strangia, formerly known as the Turniphead, fulfilled his promise and came to visit them at the castle, via the Market Chipping portal. Of course, Sophie was glad to see him, and would always be grateful for everything he'd done for them. But even though he didn't say anything right away, it was clear to her that from the way he acted, and judging by the magnificent bouquet of flowers he'd brought her, his true intention was still to win her heart, and making her leave the castle. This made her feel slightly uncomfortable–but there was nothing she couldn't handle.

In a way, she felt truly sorry for him, knowing that he did care for real… and there was a great sadness behind his desperate obsession. Despite the obvious fact that he was being somewhat delusional and still believed she was in for a change of hearts, she definitely didn't want to lose him as a friend… a family friend…

She was also very grateful for his other gifts–some fresh meat, potatoes and vegetables from the royal farms that had survived the war, and a real cake with fresh cream for dessert. It was even more than enough for one meal. Naturally, the least she could do was inviting him to stay for dinner, hoping for Howl to be home soon. However, Howl's definition of "dinnertime" greatly varied from time to time. She eventually decided not to wait for him, and they started their meal.

Initially, there was a rather uncomfortable silence between Sophie and Prince Justin, but fortunately, Calcifer knew just the very right question to ask–could Justin please tell them a little about the peace talks? Obviously quite relieved, the prince said it would be an honor indeed, and thus, he began to tell the epic and complex story about the war between the kingdoms of Ingary and Strangia. Sophie even found a way to include Markl in the conversation, gaining his interest by breaking it down to his level of understanding. The boy took the bite, and as always, he was asking very clever questions.

In fact, Sophie mused to herself, this task might prove to be far more complicated for prince Justin than the peace talks. Markl had just questioned why in the world Justin's aunt had taken a presumed insult from an Ingarian minister so seriously that she'd successfully persuaded the king to launch an attack on the Ingarian cities.

The prince, seemingly thrown off guard, was doing his best to make Markl change the subject, blushing and stuttering slightly, fighting hard to maintain his composure. But Markl didn't budge. "Must have been quite an insult?" he said, an innocent expression on his face. But Sophie, torn between the urge to laugh out loud or try to lead the conversation into another direction, knew that there was more behind the question than Markl let on.

"Rumors said, that he referred to her as 'corpulent' or some such," Justin admitted, taking a deep breath, trying to move on.

Markl, however, was still persistent. "Shouldn't royalties know better than fussing over insults like that?" he mused. "Unless…" he continued, before Justin had a chance to open his mouth again, "…unless… she actually is, like… fat for real?"

"Markl!" Sophie scolded, wishing she could sink through the floor.

But to her surprise, Justin was just laughing, so hard that he found it difficult to speak. "It's all right," he managed. "Your assumption is rather correct, young man. I would refer to her as… a woman of… considerable size."

Sophie did her best to stifle a giggle, and failed. "But still… Markl, really, you shouldn't make fun of fat people."

Markl's eyes were wide open as he gave her that innocent look again. "But I didn't! I just meant you should feel sorry for her!"

At that moment, his reaction reminded her so much of what Howl would do, facing a similar situation. Sophie couldn't hold back the laughter no more. She made a dismissive gesture with her right hand, while covering her mouth with the other. "I'm sorry, Justin…"

"It's all right," the prince assured her, and for a moment, they all forgot that war really wasn't a laughing matter. Even Calcifer was crackling from the hearth.

Just then, the dial above the door turned, the door slid open and Howl's silhouette became visible in the doorway. As usual, Sophie's heart leapt at the sight. This time, it was beating so hard she could hardly breathe. "Howl!" She rose from the table to greet him. "Look who's here!"

Howl lifted his eyes, and she saw that he had obviously had a very bad day. His clothes were stained with dirt, and he was probably in desperate need of a bath. Squinting for a moment as if to focus, he appeared to be surveying the scene in front of him. Sophie's heart sank when she saw his eyes turning from clear blue to ice cold. She was almost uncertain he'd greet her in his usual fashion, but he promptly swept her up in his arms, kissing her. However, there was no genuine feeling behind his actions; this was obviously just a show off to be displayed in front of Justin.

"I'm sorry we couldn't wait for you, dear," Sophie heard herself saying. "I had no idea when you'd be coming back… but there's still plenty left for you…"

"Master Howl!" Markl exclaimed, obviously oblivious to his master's state of mind. "Justin brought us some real food, look!"

Howl took a deep breath through clenched teeth, reaching out his hand, taking Justin's with a plastered smile. "Prince Justin. How delightful to see you."

"Wizard Howl, the pleasure is all mine," Justin replied, just as dryly.

Sophie sighed inwardly, rolling her eyes as she rose to start preparing the dessert.

Howl's eyes were sweeping the scene, and he was still speaking in an overly formal manner. "I'm very sorry to tell you that I won't be able to join you on this happy occasion. I have very urgent matters to attend. But please, don't let me interrupt."

Before Sophie had the slightest chance to open her mouth, Howl had already swept up the stairs, and she could hear a door slamming shut. From the sound of the hinges, she knew he'd been locking himself up in the bedroom, not the studio. Urgent matters indeed…

Initially, she was almost overcome with feelings of guilt… but gradually, she felt them merging into anger. She had done nothing wrong! If Howl was in a sour mood, it was his problem… though she'd definitely have a talk with him later.

Prince Justin gave her a worried look. "Are you all right, Sophie?"

She nodded. "Don't worry."

"Are you certain? I don't want to intrude…."

"It's nothing that can't wait." She reached for the teapot. "Here, have some tea."

Markl was glancing at her questioningly, but she gave him a sharp look in return, and his eyes turned back to his plate.

"So," Sophie managed a smile. "Where were we?"

Albeit bit hesitant at first, Justin resumed his story. However, Sophie found it harder to focus by the minute. Though she tried her best to stop them, her eyes were constantly drifting up the stairway.

As the first word of profanity was slipping through the mouth of the royal prince, Sophie winced and snapped out of her thoughts, thinking at first she must have misheard. At first, Justin appeared to be totally unaware, but a few moments later he suddenly froze mid sentence, looking dazed, his cheeks turning red. "Oh Sophie! I'm sorry… I don't understand…"

"It's all right, don't worry," Sophie assured him, but within her, a feeling of suspicion and dread was rising in her stomach. Please, she pleaded to herself. Just let it be a natural slip of the tongue…

Prince Justin, still a bit taken aback but determined to continue, started over with his last sentence. Markl, initially just as puzzled as Sophie, was once again listening attentively. However, as he gently interrupted, asking Justin to clarify something regarding the degrees within the military, Sophie was truly horrified to see Justin's right index finger making its way to one of his nostrils, an absent look in his eyes. As he removed it, treads of slime were hanging from the tip of his nail.

Sophie's heart sank, and she gasped with anger. There was no doubt whatsoever in her mind, she knew exactly who was behind this. She clenched her fists in the pockets of her apron. Markl's eyes were wide as saucers as he dropped his spoon.

"Soophie…" Calcifer hissed a faint warning from the hearth, nodding in the direction of the stairs.

"Justin…" she prodded, and at her voice, the prince winced. "God dammit!" he exclaimed, before becoming himself again. Looking at his finger, he paled, quickly hiding it in his handkerchief. At the same time, his face turned the most prominent shade of red, and pearls of sweat were forming on his brow. He looked as if he was about to cry with humiliation. "I… I don't know what's got… what's got into me…" he stuttered.

But I know, Sophie thought to herself. "Look, Justin… this castle is pretty much alive. The mere atmosphere can play funny tricks on people who aren't accustomed to magic…"

Markl opened his mouth as if to say something, but fortunately, he was wise enough to stay quiet. Sophie was aware of what a terrible liar she was, but apparently, Justin accepted her explanation, and though some color remained on his cheeks, he was quickly regaining his royal composure. "Very well," he managed. "But there are no words that could describe how sorry I am… magic or not… Let me please make it up to you by inviting you–and your lovely family–to my castle… for a royal dinner, as soon as things have stabilized a little more around here…"

Sophie nodded. "Thank you. We would be delighted. And I am the one who should apologize… similar things have happened in the past…"

"Don't you worry, dear Sophie. You're a damn bloody excellent hostess… oh, sorry… but I mean, you are… and despite… this, whatever it might be… it's been delightful to see you again."

"Thank you" she nodded. And I'm gonna tan a certain wizard's hide, she made a silent promise to herself.

Maybe Justin was sensing her anger, but suddenly, it all seemed to be dawning on him. His eyes got dark and she could see his teeth clench. For a moment, she was almost certain he'd run up the stairs and challenge the wizard to a full blown fight. Not that Howl didn't deserve it, but she was still relieved when the prince's diplomatic side apparently took over. He put down his spoon on the empty plate, rising from the table, but not in a haste. "I think I'd better be on my way home soon. It's been a long day… and I think you have other, more important matters to attend to…"

At this, he suddenly let out a thundering belch. This time, he seemed totally unaware. Markl winced, once again looking at Sophie, who did her best to suppress a reaction. She drew a deep breath. "All right. Markl, dear, can you please wash up the dishes? I'll go see Prince Justin to the door."

"Yes, Sophie." Markl, still obviously having a hard time trying to understand what was going on, exchanged a look with Calcifer, who was rolling his eyes.

"Goodbye, Markl… Calcifer…" Justin nodded to the pair. "I'll see you two soon, I'm sure."

"Thank you so much, prince Justin!" Markl said, before turning his attention to the dishes.

Sophie followed Justin to the door, and much to her surprise, he opened it for her, gesturing her to follow him outside. She complied, and he firmly closed the door behind her.

"Justin, what…?" she started.

"Sophie…" Justin sighed. "I'm concerned. Don't worry about me, but you do not deserve this embarrassment, what he just did to you is–"

Having to muster up all the strength she had to control her anger, Sophie interrupted. "Look. I may not agree with his behavior all the time–and certainly not right now, I can assure you, I'll have a long talk to him at once. But I love Howl… and he has been, and is very kind to me. I couldn't ask for a better husband and I'm happy here. I think it's pretty obvious that he loves me back. I appreciate your concern, but this discussion will be of no use."

Justin nodded, a somewhat defeated look in his eyes. "I understand. But I still want to keep my promise–you're all welcome to visit me at the castle, even Howl, as long as he's feeling up to it. Also, I promise I will soon return for another visit… if that is all right with you, of course. I desperately need to see you again, Sophie, and I want to make sure you'll be all right–"

Sophie nodded. "You will always be welcome here, and there will be no more silliness, I will see to that. Just… try not to get your hopes up… regarding me, I mean. I do not want to disappoint you. You're a good, caring friend, prince Justin."

Justin took her hand, kissing it gently. "You could never disappoint me, Sophie Hat…err, Jenkins. Farewell. Some things are worth waiting for."

Lifting his hat with a twitching of the eyebrows and a smile, he swiftly turned around and walked away without another word. Sophie rolled her eyes, stomping her foot in frustration. Sometimes, she was convinced the world would be such a better place without men. Save perhaps Markl, but then again, considering that Howl was the closest thing to a father he'd ever get, she was not looking forward to his coming of age…

But though she often could see Howl's expressions mirrored on the boy's face, Markl seemed to be unusually resilient to adopting his most annoying behaviors. He rarely threw any tantrums, and though he, like any other children, appreciated attention and care whenever he was sick or sad or just in need of some company, he would never overdo it. Sophie had had to teach him some table manners and one or two things about cleaning, but she rarely had to remind him twice, and most often, he was eager to help her out. This was in fact rather remarkable, considering how things had been before she came, and judging by Markl's words, especially before the war broke out.

Of course, she didn't want to press Markl for information, but there were many things she was glad she didn't know before her first encounter with Howl. Sometimes, the boy's tongue had slipped as the two of them had been talking in private, and he'd hinted that not so long ago, Howl had been totally unable to handle any money whatsoever. Everything he'd earned from his customers had been spent on fancy clothes, silly gifts for his female friends and far too many bottles of red wine. Food was not a matter of great importance. It was Calcifer who had made sure Markl got a wallet of his own, saving his money for edibles.

Though Howl had rarely let any of his female acquaintances into the castle–in fact, the only times Markl had seen any of them at the door, they had been there to scold him–he was often out late, sometimes returning in the early hours of the morning, so drunk that he could hardly make it to bed.

At least, so much had changed. Sophie had never seen him drunk, not even at their wedding, and the Howl she knew had always kept track of the money, making sure his family would never starve. But his behavior this evening definitely had to be dealt with. Right now. Clenching her fists, she opened the door again, and just giving a brief nod to Markl and Calcifer, she ran up the stairs. She didn't even consider knocking on the bedroom door before yanking it open.

The room was only dimly lit. Howl was sitting on the bed, his back against the door. He didn't even move as he heard the door open. Sophie entered, closing the door firmly behind her. "Would you mind telling me what this is all about?"

Howl sighed, still facing the wall. "What? What are you on about?" he said in a tired voice. "I'm just not hungry, that's all."

Now blazing with anger, Sophie had to bite her lip to control herself. "Stop lying to me, Howl!" she sputtered. "The disgrace spell! Didn't you think I'd recognize it? It is disgusting, and so not fair! Especially not in front of Markl!"

Another sigh. Howl was still facing the wall. His voice was dripping with sarcasm. "Well, I'm sorry I ruined your happy reunion."

"What on Earth are you talking about?"

Howl was finally turning around to face her, looking like a defiant child. "Isn't it quite obvious what his intentions are? Pretty flowers… food that would suit a royal feast…"

"Howl, for Goodness sake! Justin is a friend, and after everything he's done for us, inviting him to dinner was the least I could do! And as for his other intentions, what do you think of me, really? Just because we were having a good time–because yes, we were having a good time–it doesn't mean I'd ever consider leaving you! Don't you trust the fact that I love you?"

Her voice nearly broke at the last sentence, but she managed to keep herself together as she continued. "In fact–we were waiting for you, but you were late! And with the spell, what were you trying to accomplish?"

Moaning, Howl hid his face in his hands, rubbing his forehead. "Oh yeah, once again, the good for nothing wizard just blew it" he muttered. "At least it's a good thing knowing you have several men to choose from should something happen to me…"

Letting her arms fall to her sides, Sophie felt as all air had left her. Was he trying to get her pity? It certainly wouldn't work. She waved her hands in frustration. "Would you please stop your wailing! And you should at least remember that had it not been for Justin, none of us would have been here! He actually saved our lives, you know!"

There was another moan from Howl, and then, he got that glass marble look in his eyes… obviously sinking into a catatonic state. Soon, his forehead and hands were glistening with what eventually would be buckets of green, putrid smelling slime.

"Howl!" Sophie warned. "Stop it. And I mean STOP IT RIGHT NOW!" So enraged that she was completely unaware of her actions, she picked up a glass from the bedside table closest to her and threw it against the wall, full force. On its way through the air, it hit several of Howl's ornaments and baubles before shattering into a thousand pieces.

Howl jerked upright with a jolt, snapping out of his tantrum, seemingly surprised himself. Breathing heavily, Sophie felt her legs buckle and she sank down into a sitting position on the floor. She felt the tears silently running down her cheeks. The only sounds that were heard were their heavy breathing and the ornaments hanging from the ceiling quivering anxiously.

"I… I'm sorry, Sophie…" Howl managed before rising from the bed, his clothes sticking tightly to his body, and a big, wet stain slowly forming on the back of his shirt. There was already a wet spot on the bed where he'd been sitting. Walking past her, reminding her of a dog with its tail between its legs, he opened the door and wordlessly headed for the bathroom, leaving only a thin trail of slime behind him.

Sophie rose from the floor, heading downstairs, without even the faintest thought of cleaning up the mess. She seated herself by the kitchen table once more, wiping her eyes before supporting her head in her hands. Markl had taken care of the kitchen as promised, and in fact he'd done a very good job. Now, she could once again hear him from the patio, happily playing with Heen. She sighed.

Suddenly Calcifer spoke from the hearth. "So, how is our drama que… err, king? I can smell the stuff all the way from here…" He wrinkled his nose. "I even got the hot water coming without him asking for it."

Sophie gave a tired laugh. "At least I made him snap out of it… I think…"

Calcifer did a double take. "You made him *snap out* of it? A green slime fit?" Wow. That must be a first."

Sophie once again gave a dry laugh. "Whatever. But I got really, really disappointed with him there."

Calcifer nodded. "You're not alone. The mind control spell was not a clever thing to do. He'll probably regret it in the morning. Using magic for malicious purposes, jealously probably being the most common cause, will always have its consequences. Headache, fever or stomach upset." He smirked. "I'd probably vote for the latter. He deserves it. He's terrified of vomiting unless he's too drunk to care. But then again, that wouldn't be fair to you, having to care for him…"

Sophie snorted. "Oh. trust me, I'd take that before the green slime any day."

Calcifer chuckled, but then, suddenly, he turned serious. "But Sophie, Howl loves you, more than life itself. He would never intentionally hurt you… though there are some mistakes that everyone has to learn from to get on with life. Only… he hasn't. Yet. But eventually, he will, because thanks to you, Sophie, he's got every intention of doing so…"

Sophie smiled, a warm feeling filling her chest. "Calcifer, you're the best…"

The fire demon crackled. "When it comes to being honest, you're definitely right. Then I'm certainly the best. Within these walls, anyway."

Sophie rose from the table, reaching out a hand as if she was giving the fire demon a light pat on his back before heading for the patio door. "Markl, Heen!* she called out. "Bedtime!"

"All right!" Markl replied, and albeit a bit reluctantly, he soon got back inside.

"Just take a shower before slipping into that nightshirt… and make sure not to forget to brush your teeth!"

"I will," the boy assured her.

She placed a kiss on his forehead, ruffling his hair as he clung to her in a very tight good night hug. "Good night, Markl!"

"Good night, Sophie!" He ran upstairs, the dog in tow, and she could hear him calling out a "Good night, master Howl!" outside the bathroom door. There was a muffled reply from inside.

A few minutes later, the bathroom door opened, and she could hear Howl's footsteps in the upstairs hallway. To her surprise, she heard a clanking from the cleaning cabinet downstairs. It appeared as if he was about to summon a mop, cleaning up in a traditional way… well, almost, anyway. But she would not lift a finger to help him this time.

There was a bustle of activity from the hallway and the bedroom, and sometimes an occasional splash of water, mixed with the rustle of sheets and blankets. Eventually, the cleaning cabinet rattled anew, and then, she could hear soft, somewhat hesitant footsteps from the top of the stairs. Howl's head was still somewhat bowed in shame as he got down. Sophie rose from the table, and without a word, he swept her into a warm embrace. "Oh God, Sophie," he whispered into her ear. Why am I such a fool… I don't know what got into me. I swore I'd never ever control you in any way, and look what I did! How could you ever forgive me?"

"It's all right," she assured him, hugging him back. "I think you've learned your lesson. And judging from what Calcifer says, you might have other consequences to expect." She smirked teasingly as she released him.

Howl visibly paled. "Let's not talk about that right now, all right? And I know I owe Prince Justin an apology. I will write him first thing in the morning."

Sophie felt she had to downplay her enthusiasm for a bit, not really letting on just how relieved she felt. She took his hand, squeezing it gently, then silently kissing his fingers as he lifted it to stroke her cheek. "It's a very good idea, I think."

Howl turned to Calcifer who was listening from his usual spot, supporting his flaming elbows on a log. "Old friend… think you can do me a last favor before bedtime?"

Calcifer rolled his eyes, sighing in his usual over dramatic manner. "And what would that be?"

"Can you please heat up some of that leftover dinner for me? If there are still any leftovers, that is," he added, winking at his beloved.

"But of course." Sophie suddenly burst with laughter. "I might help you out a little… if you keep your promises."

Howl chuckled. "I will. You have my word."

–––

Pushing his empty plate aside, Howl gave a contented sigh. "This was truly delicious," he stated. "As usual for your cooking, of course," he added with a wink.

Sophie took the wet dish rag from the sink, throwing it at him. "Flatterer!" she teased.

Howl ducked just in time, and it hit the wall behind him. "Miss!" he stated.

With mocked anger, Sophie picked up the water bucket from beside the fire place. There was not much left in it, but enough to–

"Oh, don't you dare!" Howl threatened her, his mouth twitching.

"What if I do?" Sophie swung the bucket backwards, and then forward in a rush. Calcifer yelped, but she wasn't aiming in his direction. However, a split second before the water would have splashed Howl's face, he made a swift motion with his hand, and it changed directions mid air, now aiming for Sophie. But as she'd already put up her hands in protection, some of the water recoiled, showering them both.

Both of them were now howling with laughter, and Sophie had to support herself against the sink.

"Cheater!" she cried.

"Wizard tormentor!"

"Well, oh, how original," she said in a mocking voice.

"What do you expect? I'm tired…" Howl put up a suffering face.

"So you think you're tired? What would that make me, then?" Sophie countered.

"Why don't you two just go to bed?" Calcifer sighed.

"Oh, trust me, we will, but there's just some cleaning to do first." Sophie grabbed the plate, but Howl shook his head. "No, seriously, love–"

Sweeping her up in his arms, he headed towards the stairs. Behind them, Sophie could hear the kitchen cleaning itself.

"Goodnight, Calcifer" they both said in unison. They got a small "mhm" in response.

"I've changed the sheets." Howl probably expected more than Sophie's quiet "thank you" in return, but once again she didn't want to flatter his ego unnecessary.

Despite waking up the next morning to a pounding headache and a rather high temperature, Howl was determined to keep his promise. Propped up against a pile of pillows, using a tray for support, he actually did write a long letter for the prince, sincerely apologizing and all the same accepting his invitation to the castle some time in the future.

Sophie was still quite surprised to find him much less demanding of attention this time, considering his rather poor state. Though he spent most of the day in bed, he only really called for her once, as he thought he was about to be sick. Calcifer was right, the mere thought of vomiting seemingly made him panic. Though Howl hadn't spoken of it openly (and Sophie definitely didn't want to drag it out of him), she suspected that there was more to this than the disgracefulness of the situation in itself. She had concluded that some time during Howl's childhood, there had been a traumatic incident involving sickness and abandonment. Intense nausea would probably trigger these memories as well. Without his heart, he hadn't had the opportunity to work on the issue, just treating it like another matter that had to be slithered away from. He would always be fighting the urge to vomit to all costs.

This time, though, he didn't have to worry. With some gentle massage of his temples, administered by Sophie, while she encouraged him to breathe deeply, the nausea eventually abated. After she'd fed him some easily digested formula, he was feeling much better. In the evening, he was quite recovered, and they were glad to see him at the dinner table again, enjoying the fresh meat and vegetables from the day before.

Oh yes, Howl still had so much so learn. At times, he was overly selfish, and regarding some issues, even speaking to him on Markl's level didn't make him understand. Though his bathroom time had been considerably cut down, he still spent far too much time obsessing over his appearance. And while he obviously thought of himself as a good listener, his attention span was often just as short as with the household chores, if he didn't find the subject interesting enough.

Considering that many of these behaviors normally would have sent her into fits of anger (and sometimes, they still did), why was it that she still loved him, more than she'd ever loved anyone before?

In all its complexity, the answer was very simple: Because he had taught her to love and accept herself, for what she really was. With Howl, she was always acting her true self… there was no need to hide behind a false façade. And he loved her! Even should he not have expressed it verbally and despite her initial denial, she had to admit that there was no way he could pretend. His feelings were all mirrored in his eyes–sometimes, and particularly during their most intimate moments, his gaze was so intense that she almost had to look away.

Whenever there was an important decision to make, he always looked to her for support, in some cases he didn't even seem to be aware of his actions, just instinctively seeking her eyes for an affirmative glance in return. Whenever they were going somewhere together, he always made sure to let the world how much she meant to him, showing his affection quite openly (and even in front of pretty girls!)

All this… had made her grow. She had suddenly realized she was no longer the plain, unattractive girl who seldom laughed and whom everybody considered quite uninteresting, even boring… in fact, she had never been. The Witch of the Waste might have put the aging spell on her, but in truth, she had already been an old lady in a young woman's body, constantly downgrading herself. There was only one person who could break the spell–since it went so much deeper than the physical. Calcifer could have given Howl his heart back, and Howl could have loved her to death, but it wouldn't had helped at all–had she not realized that in fact, she was a young, witty, warm hearted and beautiful girl who actually was worthy of Howl's… or rather everyone's love, it would all have been for nothing.

This insight seemed to have stirred something within her… generating a new energy of a kind she had never previously experienced. She suddenly found that everything she did–or created–was turning out way better than before. If she had been cleaning, the floors would be shining after what appeared to have been just a few sweeps of the broom. If she was making flower arrangements or sewing hats, it seemed as if her hands were just working by themselves, creating beautiful bouquets or the most amazing hats.

Sometimes, it was like a great barrier had been broken within her, allowing her to show her feelings openly. When she cried, she cried until there were no tears left, and no one would hold it against her. When she laughed, she laughed with all her heart, never holding back as she felt it coming. She was also aware of that she was capable of returning the love given her, several times over, not only for Howl, but also for Markl, never once doubting that she loved him just as much as she would love her future children.

Yes, those were the reasons she was so madly, head over heels and yet so deeply in love with the wizard who might never quite grow up, but still had the wisdom of teaching her the greatest gift she would ever learn.

–––

To be continued...