I stocked up on chapters so I figured what the hell? So here you go. Hope you enjoy. Read and review. It makes my day ;)
Chapter Twenty
Daryl sat cross legged in the middle of the bed and watched as Carol sat in the same position in front of him, holding the gun in her hands.
"That's it?" She asked as she shoved the clip in, released the safety and cocked the weapon back.
"That's it." He shrugged.
"Well hell." She frowned.
Daryl smirked. "Told ya it wasn't hard to learn."
They had checked in on Carl and Sophia before heading to his room. He didn't mind using a gun but he just liked using a crossbow better. He'd used one damn near all his life. They were quieter and he was good with it. But him and Merle always had guns handy. They had needed them with the people Merle was always running around with and all the trouble they got into. So now that Merle was gone he had a few extra.
Someone knocked on the door and they both turned to stare at it. Neither knew who would be looking for either of them. Sophia already knew where they were and they had already told her she didn't have to knock when she came looking for them. Which is why they weren't sitting very close. And Daryl did want her to know how to use the gun so he kept his distance to keep himself from getting distracted.
"Yeah?" Daryl finally called.
"Hey, man. You two decent in there?" Glen called from the other side of the door.
They glanced at each other and then Daryl shook his head. "Yeah. Decent enough." He yelled.
Glen and Dale came in and stood there awkwardly.
"Well?" Daryl asked, lifting one eyebrow at them. "The hell ya'll want?"
They both sat down on the couch that sat flush with the wall by the door. "We need Carol." Glen said after it became apparent that Dale wasn't going to be the one to say anything.
Daryl snorted. "Don't we all?" He leaned back against the pillows with his arms crossed behind his head.
Dale leaned up and laced his fingers together in front of him. "We think we should try to get Jenner and Milton to come with us."
Daryl rolled his eyes. "Those guys are nuts. Ain't nothin' we can do to get them to come and not just that but we don't need'em. Just more mouths to feed and I don't know if you noticed but they are fuckin' crazy. We got enough bullshit to deal with as it is." And then he seemed to remember what Glen had said. "The fuck could Carol do to talk any sense into'em when the rest of you ain't been able too?"
Glen shrugged. "Carol just has a way about her. People trust her. We think she would be able to talk them into coming with us."
Daryl narrowed his eyes. He didn't want her talking to either one of them. Not after what they had said earlier. He still wanted to take their heads off but he figured if he did that then she'd never let him hear the end of it.
"I'll talk to them." She said suddenly and those narrowed eyes zeroed in on her.
"No you ain't." He growled.
She shot him a look that would have probably made that Milton guy piss himself. But Daryl wasn't scared as easily.
"You heard what they said. They don't see any point in tryin' to survive out there. If they wanna fry that's their business."
Dale shook his head. "Daryl, you know you don't want either of these men to do that. They're scared to death. If we can talk to them, if Carol could bend their ear a bit, then that could help. We could save their lives."
"I never said I wanted them to do anything. I just don't care either way."
"Daryl!" His eyes slid over to the angry woman. "You don't mean that. And you don't tell me what to do either. If I can help these men, if Dale and Glen think I can help them, then that's what I'm going to do."
He sighed. "Fine. Ya'll ain't nothin' but a bunch of damn do gooders."
"So you two will come back with us then?" Dale asked in a hopeful voice.
"Just give us a minute. We'll be right behind you." Carol said.
Daryl rolled his eyes and watched the two men leave. He was probably really going to get an ear full now. He should have done what he usually did and kept his damn mouth shut. He looked up at the ceiling instead of at her.
"Do you really not care whether those people live or die?" She asked softly.
That wasn't the tone he had been expecting to hear from her so he looked at her and saw that she didn't look angry. Just sad. Which made him feel like a real son of a bitch. "I care about you. But they pissed me off." He said honestly.
She raised her eyebrows at him, that sad look replaced by one of mild amusement. "Well, we should go. Just because they pissed you off doesn't mean we should let them kill themselves. Everyone makes you mad, Daryl. I saw that from the first day you showed up at camp."
He sat up and swung his legs around. "If that's what you wanna do." He grumbled.
"It is." She stood up and then tried to hand him the gun.
He pushed her hand away gently and shook his head. "It's yours. I'll teach you to use a rifle too but I wanted to wait till we were outside. This'll do you for now though."
She looked stunned. "You're giving me a gun?"
"Well, I know it ain't the most romantic thing in the world to give a woman but now days it's the smartest." He smirked.
She looked down at the weapon in her hand and grinned before she looked back up. "I have a gun."
"I see that." He almost laughed.
"And I know how to use it."
He nodded and grinned. "Yeah. I know. I was here, remember?"
"Where do I put it?" She asked after looking at the gun for a few more seconds.
"Make sure the safety is on and then put it in your pants." He watched her as she checked the safety and then stuffed the gun in the back of her jeans and pulled her shirt down. "Like that?"
He laughed at her this time. "Yeah, just like that."
She grinned and then took his hands to pull him up from the bed and then wrapped her arms around his neck. "I wanna go shoot something." She said as he put his hands on her hips.
He shrugged. "Maybe you can shoot somethin' when we leave. That Milton would crap his pants if you started shootin' up the place, woman. Besides that, you don't wanna waste the ammo. When you do shoot it needs to be at a Walker."
She nodded and then pulled his face down to hers. "Tomorrow I'm going to shoot the shit out of some Walkers." She grinned.
He couldn't say anything else because she kissed him and usually when she did stuff like that his brain only went to one place. She tasted like wine and instantly he wanted more so he pulled her closer and deepened the kiss. Before this he'd never understood what the big deal was. It wasn't something he really thought much about. Having someone shove their tongue in his mouth never appealed to him. But as she sucked gently at his bottom lip he definitely understood the appeal now. All he would have to do was take a few steps back and there was the bed. And he knew she was willing. His fingers dug into her hips roughly.
"Mom?"
His eyes snapped open at the same time Carols did. The alcohol they had both consumed must have slowed down their ability to move very fast because instead of jumping apart like they normally would have if they had been caught like this they just froze up for a second.
Finally she stepped away from him and turned around. Sophia was leaning against the door with her arms crossed and a small smile tugging the corners of her mouth up.
"We were just talking." Carol said but she was very unconvincing. It almost came out sounding like a question.
"Good save, Carol." He said as he rolled his eyes.
Sophia just stared at them with that half amused expression on her face. Daryl blew out a breath. "Well, come on kid. What kind of smart ass thing you got to say?"
That small smile turned into an out right grin and then she shrugged her slender shoulders. "Good job, Daryl. That was exactly what I was talking about."
He had to look at the floor to hide his own smile. This kid definitely didn't need any encouraging.
"Sophia, we were just..." Carol started but the girl didn't let her finish.
"You were just kissing? I saw. I was just coming to tell you that if you needed me I'd be down the hall in Carl's room."
Carol's face turned three shades of red before she just nodded to the girl. She knew better than to deny what they had been doing.
"Have fun." Sophia said and then slipped back out the door.
"My twelve year old daughter just caught me making out with you." She hissed as she turned to him. "And then she told me to have fun."
He couldn't help it. He laughed. "Yeah, she did."
"Daryl, that's not funny. What kind of mother am I? I knew she could have walked in whenever!" She sounded like she really felt bad.
"Maybe your the kind of momma that she cares about enough that she just wants to see you happy. And for some reason she's crazy enough to think I can do that." He started chewing his thumbnail and looked away. "Let's go save those dumb ass men you're so worried about."
He could feel her eyes on him as he stalked to the door.
~H~
Everyone was still sitting in the same spots they were sitting in when her and Daryl had stormed out well over an hour ago but the mood had changed a lot. Mostly thanks to Shane. Rick and Dale were talking to Jenner, their faces determined. Jenner looked as though he was trying to be as polite as possible but it was obvious to her that he was starting to feel uncomfortable. She sat across from them like she had done before and Daryl sat down heavily in the chair next to her.
She listened to Rick for a moment. "But there has to be something else out there. A safe place. A place worth living for." He said to Jenner.
Jenner just shook his head. "Milton and I have known that it would end like this for a long time now. We've come to terms with it. We've done everything we could."
Milton looked up then and noticed that Carol was back. He shot Daryl one of those quick nervous looks but then met her eyes once more. "I wanted to apologize for what I said earlier. I was out of line and I hope I didn't frighten you." He said sincerely.
"She ain't scared. She ain't some pussy that's gonna curl up and die. Ain't nothin' you can say to her that's gonna change that." Daryl snapped.
She elbowed him in the ribs. Maybe he thought he was helping but he wasn't. She shot him a look that she hoped told him to shut up without her having to say it. When she looked back at Milton she gave him a small smile. She understood how the men felt. There were days when she would think death would be easier than an uncertain existence filled with fear and pain, and that was before the world went to hell. But she had always shaken off that thought. Not only because she would never leave Sophia like that but also because, inside, she had been strong. Maybe not strong enough to leave Ed but she was strong enough to live through it.
She reached across the table and touched his hand. She noticed Andrea watching her intently. Milton's hand tensed under her own and he glanced at Daryl quickly. "Milton. Why are you so sure that this is the best thing for you?" She asked in a soft voice.
Rick had stopped talking to Jenner and she could tell that everyone was looking at her. She just kept her gaze on Milton. "There isn't anything left," He said quietly.
"Milton, as long as the world is still spinning, there is always something left. It's just a little more scary out there is all."
He just shook his head sadly. "It's too dangerous."
"And it wasn't dangerous before?" She asked.
"That's different. We've seen the things that's happened out there. You saw the bodies on your way in. A world like that is not worth living in."
"You've had a cold view from behind the glass, Milton. The two of you have holed up in this place and you've been looking at everything in these ridiculous technical terms. There's death out there just like there always has been. There is fear out there just like there was fear out there before. It's on a bigger scale now but all those other things, those little things that always made life worth living before, they're still out there too."
The room had grown so quiet that her gentle voice could be heard easily.
"It's easier this way." Milton argued dully.
"Yes. I agree. I can see why it appeals to you. But hasn't this always been the easier thing to do? Say you killed yourself five years ago. Long before things got the way they are now. Tell me some of the things you would have missed out on seeing. Some of the things, no matter how small, that's touched you in the last five years. Jokes that have made you laugh. People that have shown you kindness. Friends that you've made. If you had died five years ago, what would you have missed out on?" She asked with a small smile.
He looked down at her hand that was still covering his. "But it isn't like it was then. I would have missed out on a lot if I had died that long ago. But there isn't anything to miss out on now. There's nothing left. Hunger, pain, fear. That's all there is."
It seemed as though they were the only two in the room. Their voices kept getting quieter.
"A year ago my husband came home from work late and his dinner had gotten cold. He was furious." She stopped smiling as she took a breath and went on. "He grabbed me by the back of the neck and slammed my face into the refrigerator so hard that he broke three bones in my face. I blacked out and woke up on the floor hours later and then had to drive myself to the hospital while he sat in his chair and watched television."
Milton looked as though he wanted to cry at that and he turned his hand over in hers and squeezed. "I'm sorry."
She shook her head. "Don't be. When I got back home from the hospital it was nearly dawn and everyone was still asleep. I went out to the back porch and I sat on the step." She smiled at the memory. "I waited for the sun to come up and I sat thinking about how much easier it would have been if I hadn't woken up. If maybe that had been the blow that had finally killed me."
She felt Daryl stiffen next to her and she leaned into him a little.
"I sat there like that and thought about how many more times he was going to hurt me before I just couldn't go on anymore. And then when the sun finally broke over the horizon that morning it was one of the most amazing things I had ever seen. The clouds lit up and no artist in the world could have painted a more beautiful picture. I stared at that scene for so long that I nearly went blind." She laughed quietly, "And then I thought to myself, I would have missed this if he had killed me. It didn't make the pain go away. It didn't make my fear go away. But right then I was glad to be alive so I could witness that sunrise. It may not seem like much right now. It probably sounds like the silliest thing in the world. But at the time it wasn't."
"What are you saying?" Milton whispered.
"What I'm saying is, there are still things out there worth living for. Still beauty in this world even if you have to look much harder to find it. There are still people to meet and things to see and places to go. It's going to be scary and it's all going to be uncertain but it's going to be worth it. I truly believe that."
No one said anything for a long time and finally Milton looked up. But he didn't look at her. He looked at Daryl. "How could you do that to her?" He asked severely.
"Huh?" Daryl asked, clearly confused.
"How could you hurt someone like her?"
Carol understood instantly. "Milton, he isn't my husband."
He looked back and forth between them. "He isn't? I just thought... but you have those bruises" He looked at her throat then.
"My husband is dead. This was just a parting gift." She said quietly.
He nodded. "So who is he?"
Carol gave his hand a finally squeeze before she let it go. "He's another reason that I am very glad to be alive right now. Even in this new world." She smiled. "He's another reason for me to live."