This idea came to me while I was high (yes, higher than a kite) on migraine medication proscribed by my doctor. Seriously trippy sh*t! e_0 lol but anyway...

As I was way up there with no low in sight, I was driving my mom insane, singing to every song on the radio, even if I didn't know the song. (I don't remember any of this!) so my mom sat me down at my lap top and said "Why don't you write another one of your stories?" and so, there I sat, for 2 hours before I passed out, typing up 4 pages (I was heavily and consistently distracted, I think...) writing some of the most random shit I had ever, ever seen. I mean really! This story is one of the ideas I had. It was the best of them and I kinda remember where it was going, as it was the last one I wrote down before I passed out.

Disclaimer © : I do not own Katekyo Hitman Reborn!... but this funny-as-sh*t plot line I do.

Warning: language (from author) and cross-dressing! And a lot of Crack! Even more angst! (seriously, I cried while writing it!)

Oh I love this story line!

Happy reading!

~!~

Hibari Kyoya looked to his left. No-one. He looked to his right. Again, no-one. The window was closed, locked and the curtains were drawn. The door to his room was also closed and locked, and barricaded with the small table that he owned. He was alone in his house, alone in his room, with no expecting visitors.

The coast was clear.

Kyoya lit a few candles and turned off the light before he stripped off his clothes, folding them neatly on the bed to his right. He strode over to his closet and slowly drew it open. He sat on the floor in the closet, bare-ass naked, and holding a small box to his chest. The box was beige, a little longer than his forearm and about half as wide as it was long. A feeling of guilt and unease began to well up in the pit of Kyoya's stomach, tightening around his heart the more the perfect pushed against the feeling.

The black-haired 17-year-old lifted the lid and set the box on the floor in front of him, pulling the red silk cloth from its confines. He gently placed the silk dress back down on the lid, instead pulling out the black corset that he started to struggle on.

There were only 3 things in this world that Kyoya felt, well, real doing. He felt real whenever he was fighting. The thrill of dodging (a relatively good fighting opponent) while striking back was amazing and he felt truly alive when he did. Another time was when he was protecting Namimori, and everything that had to do with either the middle school or the small town.

The third was one Kyoya made sure no-one knew of. It was when he was cross-dressing as a woman. The corset, the skirts and dresses, the frilly underwear, the wig, the high-heels, and the make-up. It all made him feel, well, real!

Finally done with the corset, Kyoya then pulled on the black lace underwear, and began fishing through his closet for a different dress or an outfit other than the silk dress. He didn't feel like wearing red tonight. He pulled out a slightly frilled, dark chestnut skirt that fell to just above his knees and slipped into it, before looking for the blouse that went with it. He smiled softly as his eyes found the perfect shirt, a button up black blouse that fell off both shoulders, and went all the way down his arms. He slid his arms through the cotton sleeves and did up the buttons.

He tied back his real hair with a net and reached for the wig, flipping it on. The fake hair was as black as his real hair, though much longer, reaching just above the center of his back. He finished off his look with a pair of long black stockings and black stiletto high-heels.

Kyoya looked at his reflection in the full length mirror and offered a small smile.

"Hello, Kayla." Kyoya said, addressing his female self. 'Kayla' offered a small, shy and sad smile in return, shifting her weight onto one foot and tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. Kyoya's vision was getting blurry as Kayla's eyes got rather watery. Tears spilled down Kayla's cheeks and Kyoya's breathing stuttered.

"Kayla," Kyoya began, his voice almost shaking. "Why are you crying again? Is it because I can't let anyone know about you? Is it because I can't let you even out of this room? Because I can't let you go, or completely embrace you?" Kyoya fell to his knees, burying his face in his hands. Why did he have to be such a complete herbivore?! He was supposed to a carnivore!

"A wolf in sheep's clothing... more like the sheep in wolf's clothing..." Kyoya laughed bitterly, entirely hating himself. A feminine voice that sounded just as bitter as his laugh spat scornful words in his head. 'I hate you, too, my stupid male counter-part.' Obviously, Kayla hated him too. Who wouldn't? The perfect ('What an accurate title, Mr. Perfect.' Kayla snarled in his head.) reached behind him and slipped off his shoes, crying and crawling onto his futon, blowing out the candles on the way.

Kyoya bit into his wrist, hard enough to taste blood, and began to try to sleep. He knew he wouldn't, but he tried.

~!~

A/N: Well, what do ya think? Should I leave it like this or go for one of the 3 other extras I kinda have in mind (truth be told, I have no idea which one seems more likely, Reborn finding out and forcing Kyoya's secret out to Tsuna; Reborn finding out and forcing Kyoya's secret out to Tsuna, Gokudera and Yamamoto; or fuck it all and have Kusakabe find out instead the next morning).

Btw, if I do have all three (27,59, and 80) find out, it's because Reborn (without Kyoya's permission) invites the three over to said skylarks home for dinner!

So! Please read, and review, tell me what you like, what you hate, if you find this to be funny or horrible, and which which of the 3 choices you like best (if any at all)!

And please, if you are going to flame this, then I beg of you to please, please remember that during the creation of this weird-ass work of art, I was higher than a kite!

Thank you for your time! M.A. ~ now then, off to continue my chainmaille pieces for the craft fair this weekend. Time to make me some money! (dear lord, please, I need it!) lol