"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"Its You-Know-Who!"

"We're all gonna die!"

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"We're cursed, we're cursed!"

"Save us save us!"

"Javert! Do something! Police!"

"Its Snapes fault!"

"What? No! Detention, lavender!"

"Ahh! I see him, I see him!"

"That's a lamp, you idiot."

" Same thing."

"Not really."

"They're both nose-less!"

" Its Bellatrix! NO, God deliver me!"

"Harry, help us!"

"Where is he, where are they?"

"Ahhhhhh! I hear something at the door!"

"Can they get in here?"

"Duh! They're dark wizards!"

"Run!"

"Where?"

"Err…I dunno?"

It was chaos, everybody running around in absolute panic, wands were out and scripts were flying as the cast screamed in panic. It was a general riot, and it was almost completely my fault. I was going to KILL Bellatrix. Hopefully before she kills us all. Why had I asked her? Was I insane? And why had she brought Voldemort along? That was the worst idea I'd ever heard of. I seriously hoped that he wouldn't be playing Thénardier. That would be a real disaster, because everybody knows that The Dark Lord-although he has a very good voice-was prone to cursing any character that annoyed him. Mainly, all of us. Don't ask me how I know this. The story of Voldemort as Freddie in Chess was too horrific to recount. Just let it be known that that was the last time I'd EVER hold open auditions. Or the last time I'd cast the first person who came along out of sheer terror. The only beam of hope was that if they had this much energy for the fight scene, we'd be ok.

"SHUT UP! THERE'S NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT!"

But all my yelling wasn't calming people down, and it was just a chaotic as before. There was a mad rush towards the back of the room as somebody heard a random sound, and said it was Voldemort.

"Who let Voldemort into Hogwarts?" Somebody yelled. This very, very good question quieted everybody down.

" Yeah, that's a good question."

"Was it Dumbledore?"

"Surely not!"

"But-maybe he's gone bad?"

"Impossible!"

"He's gonna get killed by you soon anyway Snape."

"How dare you insult a teacher, Fred. Detention!"

"What! It's the truth."

"Fred…please, let's keep it in the present OK."

"Sorry, Andromeda."

" Wait-But who did let them in?"

"Err…I did."

"You did! That's impossible! But, you're the director!"

"Wait-" gasped Lee. "I know whats going on here! You-" he pointed at me " You are still a Black. You are a spy! A double crosser! You've just been pretending to be with us!"

" You mean like Javert?"

" Uh-huh."

" No, you guys, of course not. I let them in-because, well, they will be playing the Thenardiers."

I was met with silence. Total, shocked, silence that was broken only by the creak as the door opened to reveal a snake-like nose less man with red eyes standing next to a tall, gaunt beauty, with a hollow face and dark, flashing violet eyes.

"Hello sister" hissed Bellatrix Lestrange.

" NO!" yelled Harry and Sirius simultaneously.

" SHE KILLED ME!" Yelled Sirius, brandishing his wand at his smirking cousin, anger on his face like a terrible scar. She smiled at him, displaying pointed teeth, tossing a lock of think black hair out of her eyes.

"You witch!" he turned on me. "How could you let my Murderer-" he spat that word at my feet- " In here?"

"Calm down Sirius. She hasn't killed you yet."

"But I will…..at the very first chance…blood traitor." She hissed, her fingers curling around her wand.

"Why not now then?" asked Draco, sounding genuinely interested.

" Draco, Draco, Draco. My 'Sister' has made me take an unbreakable vow. I can't kill anyone before the book said so. And I can't kill anybody else, either-without a very good reason."

" She made me add the last bit." I mumbled, annoyed, and somewhat ashamed. "So everybody be good."

Harry jumped up, his glasses askew.

"What about me?"

" What about you?"

"He's my arch enemy. He's the antagonist! I can't let him live! We should be dueling, trying to fulfill the prophecy, not performing in a play together."

" I agree." said Voldemort. "Its my job to kill him. This may be my only chance. Due to the annoying fact that I am incapable to kill him-through no fault of my own- I must carpe horas."

" No killing." I said. "No dueling." Both Harry and Voldemort groaned, then glared at each other."

"Snaky."

"Four-eyes."

"No-Nose."

" Idiot."

"That's pathetic Voldy."

"Pah!"

"Incompetent fool."

"Orphan!"

"Back at you."

"Half blood."

"How dare you! You idiot half blood, how dare you insult my master!" shrieked Bellatrix, her wand at Harry's throat. The Dark Lord chucked, low and dangerous.

"See Draco, there are still some loyal to us, even if your father is not among them."

"Hey-"

" Can it-both of you." I snapped, annoyed. "Bellatrix back off. Thank you. You better be happy with this, cast-and if not, you better do a good job pretending." I glare around at the cast. I did not want any deaths on my toll this time around.

"Now, we'll go straight into the next song. Sirius, ready?"

"No."

"I don't care. And no smartass comments this time."

"What about me?"

"Bellatrix? You can er…study your lines."

"Hey! Give me my-er-never mind."

"Bella! Give Ginny back her script. I'll get you your own. Ready? Ok, lets go!"

With an annoyed expression on his face, Sirius swaggered out into the middle of the room with his script. A smile hinted on his lips as he began to sing.

[VALJEAN]

What has Andromeda done?

Sweet Jesus, what has she done?

Inviting those death eaters here,

Making us all sing in fear

And has she fallen so far,

And are the rest of us really that terrible

That she stoops to hiring death eaters-isn't that horrible?

Now they're be cries in the dark that nobody hears,

When the death eaters hex us into the turning of the years!

"Sirius!" I yell, amused and annoyed at the same time. "What was that?"

"The song." He deadpanned.

"No, it most certainly was not." I flipped around the script in his hands, and waved my wand, causing the song to go back to normal. "Thats the song. Now sing it."

"Err- I liked the other version?"

"It was your rude version, and I won't stand for it."

"Sorry?"

"You better be."

"Ok"

"Continue!"

If there's another way to go

I missed it twenty nineteen long years ago

-well, thirteen really.

My life was a war that could never be won

But we did! We beat Voldy! Or-we will. In book 7

They gave me a number and murdered Valjean

Murdered Sirius black! Except not really.

When they chained me and left me for dead

In Azkaban! Lousy beasts!

Just for stealing a mouthful of bread

Just for being falsely accused!

Yet why did I allow that man

Werewolf! Not man. Not fully.

To touch my soul and teach me love?

He treated me like any other

Only fair. I was never prejudiced against his 'furry problem'

He gave me his trust

He called me brother!

He called me a marauder!

My life he claims for God above

Can such things be?

Can they?

"No."

"Why not?"

"There is no God."

"Will you guys stop with that? It's really disrespectful."

"Sorry."

For I had come to hate the world

This world that always hated me

They always have. Even my own family.

Take an eye for an eye!

Turn your heart into stone!

"Or a horcrux" Harry whispered, smirking at Voldemort.

"You shouldn't know about them, Potter!"

"But I do. Read the book."

"That's dishonest."

"So?"

"Its cheating."

"Everybody does it."

"I am the Dark Lord. I am above such nonsense.

"Yeah, but-"

"Harry, er…Mr. He-who-must-not-be-named, I need to sing."

"Sorry."

This is all I have lived for!

This is all I have known!

One word from him and I'd be back

He'd never betray me.

Beneath the lash, upon the rack

With the dementors, in a cell. What's a rack?

"A rack is a muggle torture-"

"Thanks Hermione, but I'll tell him later."

Instead he offers me my freedom

He's so kind! Thanks Remus!

"You're Welcome. and that's the Bishop to you."

I feel my shame inside me like a-

Ouch! That hurt, Bellatrix. Andromeda, you sister threw a knife at me."

" BELLA."

"Its in the script."

"Yes, but-"

"I killed Sirius black!"

"You did not."

"Crap. Well, I will later."

" Can I continue?"

"By all means dear cousin"

He told me that I have a soul,

I knew I did! Told you, James.

How does he know?

Because he's my BFF!

What spirit comes to move my life?

Lupin, duh.

"SHUT UP!"

Is there another way to go?

"Is there?"

"Yeah. I'll fire you if you don't can it."

I am reaching, but I fall

"Into the table. Ow."

And the night is closing in

And I stare into the void

To the whirlpool of my sin

But I'm innocent!

I'll escape now from the world

From the world of Jean Valjean

This guy's a loony. Can't he be an animagus?

"No"

"That'll spice things up a bit!"

" It gets better."

"It better get better. Because this is pointless. Can we stop here?"

" Why? You only have two lines."

"Oh"

Jean Valjean is nothing now

Another story must begin!

"Lets chuck it already! Who hoo! Finally! I hate solos. and this guy is cracked. "

I could see Bellatrix smirking at me, as if to say 'This is your silly little show?'

"Break time everybody!"

to be continued.