Here we are. I bet you all thought that I'd forgotten about you, didn't you? Well, real life sucks balls and I've been struggling to find time to write lately, but its better late than never, right? No? Oh well, I can but try. But since today is my birthday, I thought I'd treat myself by updating. Unfortunately my hotmail account is being a bitch also, I haven't got around to replying to all the reviews, for which I am very sorry, and i hope you can forgive me.
Did I mention it's my birthday today?
Neah knocked warily on the door to the Millennium Earl's private chambers. He knew he was expected, but not showing the Earl the proper respect could prove disastrous.
As he retracted his fist he noticed that his hands were shaking and scowled in annoyance. He should not be afraid of this man!
Not only was it a matter of pride, but the Earl would not hesitate to take advantage of any weakness.
A deceptively jovial sounding command to enter interrupted Neah's attempts to stop the fine trembling of his limbs. He took a deep steadying breath and smoothed out his frown, releasing the breath slowly as he pushed his way into the Earl's suite.
The room was dimly lit, and if was anyone else, Neah would have said it was to create an intimate atmosphere, however, as this was the Earl, there was bound to be a sinister ulterior motive.
He couldn't see much in the dim interior, but he didn't need to see to know where the Earl was.
A fire raged in the grate on the far side of the huge sitting room, a winged armchair silhouetted against the flickering light.
He approached the chair, head held defiantly high. He knew that this was what the Earl wanted- he wanted a fighter, a challenge, but when the alternative was rolling over and passively giving himself to the other man, there was no alternate course of action.
He studied the man in the chair, who did not look up, or otherwise acknowledge the presence of the younger man beside him, instead the Earl continued to stare into the flames silently.
Tyki was right- in his true form there was nothing ugly about the Earl's body. Long-limbed with solid, powerful shoulders, the Earl was both taller and broader than Tyki, stubble roughened instead of clean shaven and altogether different from his lover, but not unattractive. If only the personality matched the packaging then perhaps Neah wouldn't be so reluctant, though the man could never match up to Tyki in any way.
"Neah" his name was breathed, the deep voice rolling over the letters like a caress. That voice certainly matched the body, Neah thought absently, lowering his head in acknowledgement and the faintest hint of respect. "Earl."
"Now, now, don't be like that" the other man admonished, reaching out and clasping a large hand over Neah's wrist.
The Noah tried not to flinch at the touch, but the Earl noticed anyway and the grip tightened. "What's the matter Neah?" this time the words were growled, a threat and a promise. "Is my touch so repugnant to you?" he hissed, jerking Neah closer so suddenly that he stumbled, only just catching himself on the back of the chair so that he was hanging over the other man, staring down with wide startled eyes.
"N..no" he managed, the words sounding choked. "Not at all, I…"
"Or perhaps" the Earl interrupted smoothly, his hand clenching on Neah's wrist in a warning to stop talking, "it is because I am not Tyki."
Neah's heart shuddered to a stop, and no matter how he tried, he could not prevent the half-smothered gasp or shock-widened hands that were impossible to hide.
He attempted to free his arm, stepping backwards and trying to put some distance between them, but the grip on his wrist was too strong to brek away from. "I don't know what you mean! I… he… you..." he struggled more, his denials useless in the face of the Earl's calm, icy expression.
"Now, now" the Earl chided again, giving the arm in his grip a sudden, sharp yank, catching the panicking Noah by surprise so that he fell off balance, sprawling across the Earl's lap, looking up at the other man in horror. "Don't be like that" the Earl continued, using the hand that wasn't clasped around the pale wrist to brush the dark hair from where it had fallen across the Noah's brow. "I'm sure we can come to some… arrangement."
Neah shook his head, throwing himself off the Earl's knee and landing in a heap in front of the roaring fire. The sudden movement had dislodged the Earl's grip.
The Earl stood, towering over the shorter man who cringed back a little, all pride forgotten in the face of the Earl's fury.
"Do not forget your place, Musician" he sneered the title, backhanding the young Noah across the face. "And NEVER forget that you are not irreplaceable."
Neah wiped away the trickle of blood from his lip where he had cut it against his teeth with the force of the blow. He tried to glare at the Earl but quickly averted his eyes. He didn't want to admit it, even in his own head, but right now the Earl terrified him. He gingerly got to his feet, edging away from the Earl as he did so.
"What kind of arrangement?" he asked bitterly.
As though at the flick of a switch, the Earl beamed at him, fury wiped out in the blink of an eye. He gave an indulgent chuckle. "I'm so glad you asked" he smiled. "It's pretty simple- be mine, or Tyki-pet will die."
Noah closed his eyes. There was no question as to what his answer would be, and he knew that the Earl knew that. The Noah might not be the most moralistic of people, but they were loyal to those they loved. 'I'm so sorry Tyki'
"If you promise to leave Tyki completely alone, I'll do it."
"Done" the Earl said with a sharp nod of his head. He bowed low, his curly hair, so like Tyki's hanging over his eyes and giving him the appearance of an overgrown schoolboy, an image his next words destroyed. "Your body now belongs to me, and I'll kill anyone else who dares to touch you." He straightened abruptly, gesturing to a door half hidden in the darkness. "After you."
0o0o0o0
Neah blinked open his eyes, looking around blearily. It had been a long time since he had given his past much thought so he couldn't understand why the memory had come back to him now of all times. He'd claim nostalgia if those memories were not of the event that ruined his life.
He idly scratched his nose, heaving a sigh and watching his breath condense in the frigid air. It was as he was contemplating the shapes his breath made as it drifted away that he realised that something was, well, not wrong per se, but very different. He was actually physically scratching his nose. Allen's nose. Whatever.
It was unnerving actually. Sure he'd been able to grab control for moments when Allen was weak and distracted, and had happened when, even on a subconscious level, they were aiming for the same goal. And then it had only been partial control- this was different- more complete.
Curiously he attempted to stand, but whether his control was less complete than he thought, or he'd forgotten how legs work, but either way he couldn't get them to co-operate.
Deciding that standing wasn't going to happen for a moment at least, Neah leant back against the chilly wall and closed his eyes. As he fell into a meditative state, he began to search his mind for Allen's presence. If the boy could talk to the Noah when he was in control, it stood to reason that the reverse was also true.
The boy wasn't dead, that much the Noah could ascertain- he suspected that once the accommodator died, the innocence would revert to its natural form, although if only Allen's spirit died, the body wouldn't have physically been dead, so would it? But the new spirit inhabiting the body was a Noah, carrier of Dark Matter, the opposite of innocence, so would that actually matter? Damn he was confusing himself. The important thing was that he was pretty sure that Allen wasn't dead.
Wasn't very alive either, if the way that Neah felt in this body was any indication.
Allen had been sicker than he had thought, it was no wonder that he'd passed out. He searched his mind for the other presence, poking into the deepest recesses to try and locate where Allen was hidden.
When it was the other way around, it had seemed very easy to locate each other, but now Neah felt himself breaking into a sweat as he struggled to trawl through the darkness in his mind. He didn't remember it being this dark usually either.
He winced at that thought- he had once believed that he had just as much right too this body as Allen did. Sure the boy had been born into it, but without the Noah's memories, his very presence, Allen would have died a hundred times over by now. But now the more he thought about it the more he realised that he was nothing more than the parasite that Allen had once called him. just being in this darkness showed what a negative impact he had on their shared mind.
Feeling guilty and not knowing why, he continued his mental search, eventually stumbling up6n a small flickering light, burning resolutely through the darkness like a single candle flame. It was so out of place in the otherwise solid darkness that Neah instinctively knew that it had something to do with Allen. There was certainly no aspect of his own soul that could produce such a pure light.
He followed the light, which, now that he looked at it properly, was actually rather vague and nebulous, flickering in and out of existence irregularly, and every time he drew close it winked away only to reappear at a distance, even fainter than before.
He moved quicker, worried about what this dying flame meant for Allen.
He wanted to kill the Earl, he had more reason to hate the man than anyone else. He wanted to take his place and make the world suffer as he had, but now he wondered if he could go through with it. Was his revenge worth this boy's life?
Allen also wished the Earl dead, would it be so difficult to work with him to achieve that? Would half his dream, half his revenge, be enough?
Eventually the light stopped retreating, highlighting a corner- though where a corner came from in a place with no wall was a mystery.
And huddled in this impossible corner was Allen Walker.
But not Allen Walker as Neah remembered him.
Skeletal and pale, with spindly limbs and hair that may have been white, or brown, or purple even for all the distinctiveness it held in the gloom. His eyes were closed and breath whistled between slightly parted dry and chapped lips.
Neah should have been happy- it was clear that Allen was on his way out, and he didn't even have top do anything.
But he couldn't leave Allen like this- the boy was so close to death. He knew that just by looking at his appearance, and not just what the physical appearance was- it seemed that Allen didn't even have the strength to project the mental image of himself- the one that people think of when they visualise themselves in their own head.
Neah gulped. This was it- crunch time. He could either leave Allen here where he would quietly slip away, to leave Neah in total control of his body for good and allowing him to take the long awaited revenge on the Earl that he had been dreaming about since before the Earl killed him and then he'd finally be able to take his place and finally, finally be able to live the life he wanted or...
Or...
He could try and save the little exorcist. They could work together to defeat the Earl. Neah would never replace him, and would either fade away still locked in the boy's mind or have to spend the rest of his existence (because it wouldn't be a life) sharing Allen's body.
Neither choice sat well with him, for very different reasons.
What it came down to was a simple question. Could he sit back and allow his adoptive nephew to die?
He sat in consideration for several minutes. The innocence in Allen's body was fighting against him, he could feel it trying to resist him. Since neither he nor the innocence were at the top of their game, it was currently a stalemate, but the Noah knew that eventually the innocence would win- it was more thoroughly entrenched in the flesh and blood of its accommodator, whereas he merely possessed the mind. He felt it in every beat of Allen's heart and he was reminded that it was the innocence that made it so. Without it, Allen would have died long ago from the hole Tyki had created there.
Still, he was in control at that moment, even if he couldn't move.
Could he do it? Could he let Allen die?
No, he decided. If Allen died in a way that he could not have helped, then perhaps he could, with a clear conscience, use the boy's body to serve his purpose, but not right now, not when he could do something to stop it.
His options were limited however. The body he was occupying was refusing to obey his commands, and even if he could move, he was miles away from help, weak and tired- he'd never make it to civilisation before he simply collapsed and died.
There was therefore only one course of action, one he knew that Allen would never approve of, one that could quite easily backfire and kill him anyway.
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, allowing his consciousness to spread out. It had been a long time since he had used this technique, but the ease with which his mind spread came as no suprise3 to him- it was a sensation easily forgot.
He felt his mind slip over the blazing consciousness of humans, the fainter pinpricks of animals and- there!- the sinister, pulsing dark-light of a trapped soul. He called out to the Akuma, mind-voice travelling the miles like inches.
"Akuma. Find Me."
Did I mention it's my birthday?