Cuddy groped blindly for a few Kleenex from the box on her nightstand and wiped her eyes. "I'm sorry." She forced the words out.

"It's all right," Patterson reassured her. "I'm not in any hurry. Just take your time."

Cuddy gradually got control over the sobs that were shaking her. She had retreated to the bedroom for this phone call at House's suggestion. The others were watching a post-pizza movie with the girls obviously bound and determined not to go to sleep tonight, but with Wilson and Sandra both here to keep an eye on them and House, Cuddy felt safe taking a few brief minutes. But she had barely launched into a recap of the day before she totally broke down. Belle, who had followed her to the bedroom, bumped against her hand and gave a concerned trill. Slowly the storm retreated, at least for the moment, and she felt a little better. "I'm sorry," she repeated.

"You have nothing to apologize for," Patterson repeated. "Sometimes we show more strength in letting ourselves cry. Holding back until you break isn't a wiser choice."

Cuddy blew her nose and put the damp Kleenex aside. "I'm okay now. I think."

"You have the right not to be okay," Patterson reminded her. It was a concept they had been working on. "Right now, why don't you start over at the beginning and just tell me what's been happening?"

So she took it again from the top, that last session, Blythe's death, House's reaction, the scene in front of the ME's office, and the girls. She made it through this time without dissolving into tears, at least.

"Good job," Patterson said once she had finished. "Sounds like you did your best with a horrible day."

"But I screwed up everything with the girls," Cuddy protested. "They're terrified now."

"That's actually the easiest one to fix out of all this. They'll be fine, Dr. Cuddy."

"I shouldn't have explained death like that."

"No, you shouldn't have. That was a mistake. Actually, it's about half a mistake; the idea that her body stopped working and that she isn't in it anymore was good. The other two illustrations could have been phrased better, but no permanent damage has been done. They'll get over it quickly. You also made an honest effort to answer their questions, and attempting that was good, too. You did as much right there as you did wrong."

Cuddy sighed. "Glad you think so, but they obviously aren't seeing it that way."

"They're toddlers. On the other hand, that also makes them very pliable and makes mistakes easier to fix. You haven't scarred them for life."

"So what should I do?"

"With them, just start over. Tell them that you said it wrong, that it's totally different from sleep, and that it doesn't happen all the time whenever somebody walks out the door. The body stopping working was a good one. Don't use any comparison that they might partially experience themselves, such as sleep or saying it's like getting sick and not getting well. As they get older, their understanding of it will advance, but for now, just reassurance. Tell them you explained it badly. They'll be comforted by that, and the fear will wear off pretty quickly. Of course, you shouldn't catch them by surprise again by both leaving when they weren't expecting it. For the moment, always tell them where you are, where you're going, when you'll be back. But really, this will be behind them before you know it."

"Just that easy," Cuddy said skeptically.

"Yes. In this case, yes. Don't create imaginary difficulties; you've got enough real ones here. The girls will accept that you explained it badly, and they will be reassured. Of course, they'll still be watching you for several days, but it will get better." Cuddy was silent, wondering if it really could be that easy. "Everybody makes mistakes with their kids, Dr. Cuddy, and this isn't a major one. Actually, it's an opportunity."

That got Cuddy's attention. "An opportunity?"

"Yes. Aside from loving them and each other, one of the most positive things parents can do for their children is to own their mistakes. As your girls grow older, they will learn that you aren't perfect. You'll never be able to hide that from them. But they will always be watching, and how they see you deal with a mistake will become their own example for theirs. If they see you just admit it when you do something less than perfectly and go on from there, that sends them a very clear message that their own mistakes aren't a tragedy, that this happens to everybody, and they can fix them and go on. If they see you try to hide your mistakes, never admit them, cover them up, and act like it's shameful to make them, they will get an equally clear message that their mistakes are shameful and should be buried and not acknowledged until they are forced to."

Cuddy was silent. Patterson continued after a moment. "If you want them to talk to you when they are older, when they are teenagers, you need to talk to them. Now is the easy time to get in the habit, because right now, they will accept your explanations automatically. As they grow, they will start to question things more, but they will always be watching how you handle things. If they grow up surrounded with love, they will always have that framework, that foundation, to remember even when they ask questions. If they grow up surrounded by the idea that we're all human and mistakes are okay, they will always have that framework in their minds even when they make their own, even when they struggle with a large one. Being approachable and honest as a parent is far better than trying to appear infallible."

Cuddy thought about it. "That almost makes sense," she said, but her tone was still dubious.

"The problem here is that you were raised by parents who tried to hide their mistakes from you and your sister when you were growing up. So you don't think you should make mistakes, that it's something to be ashamed of and is a personal failure. Don't forward that burden onto your girls, Dr. Cuddy. Just talk to them. You explained it badly. It really is that easy at their age."

"I'll try," she said finally.

"Well done. Even old patterns can be broken; it's just harder than growing up with the right examples in the first place."

"What about Greg?"

It was Patterson's turn to sigh. "That one is going to be a lot harder."

"He's blaming himself for everything. Plus there's John's old threat; technically that was about revealing the abuse, and John would kill her. But I think he'll figure that this still counts, that he let her down."

"Just be there, Dr. Cuddy. I'm very impressed with how you handled that scene this afternoon. Stay with him, watch him, let him know you're there, that he isn't alone anymore. It actually sounds like he is being at least functional through today. He hasn't totally locked up on you. That's good."

"He's going to make himself go to the funeral, just to punish himself for this."

"You won't be able to stop him. But go with him, be there every step of the way. You will remind him what he has now. He'll get through this, I think, but it will be a lot harder and longer road than with the girls."

"At least he's got Jensen, too, but Jensen is shaken up by this himself."

"Yes. He's just human, Dr. Cuddy, like the rest of us. I think he'll be able to deal with this and help Dr. House, too, maybe not as a psychiatrist, at least not in these first few days, but as a friend. They could even help each other, since they're both feeling guilt over it. So are you."

Cuddy looked down at the cat. "I can't help wondering about that last session. I was livid with Blythe, and I really let her have it. I wonder if later, when she started feeling ill, that was why she didn't want to come disturb us. Maybe she was afraid I'd snap at her again."

"Don't put that on yourself. There is no way we will ever know what was going through her mind right then, but from your descriptions through her life, it was perfectly in character for her to ignore warning signs and think they weren't anything serious. Can't you see her doing the same thing even if you had had a perfect family day together and no sessions at all?"

"Yes," Cuddy admitted. "But Greg. . . I probably ought to get back out there and make sure everything's okay."

"Don't you think the others would have called you if the living room were on fire or some other immediate need for action?"

She almost smiled at the image. "I suppose. Still, he'll be wondering."

"He knows we're talking, and he knows you are taking this hard. Let yourself be human, Dr. Cuddy, even with him. Again, the example might even be helpful. He's going to have a lot to get through. Don't pretend you aren't shaken up, too. By taking care of yourself, you give him permission to be having a hard time with it."

"I really do need to go."

"All right. Don't try to be Superwoman, though. Let yourself take time when you need it, and let yourself cry. I'm here whenever you need to talk."

"Thank you." Cuddy couldn't resist one final question. "Do you think he'll be all right?"

There was a pause for thought, which was comforting itself in a way. Patterson wasn't just spouting some empty reassurance. "Eventually," she said. "But it will be difficult. I'm sorry for your loss, Dr. Cuddy."

"It's his loss," Cuddy countered.

"Yours, too. Not as closely as his, but she was his mother, and as such, she gave you a priceless gift. Without her, you wouldn't have her son. Give yourself permission to mourn for her however you need to, anger, guilt, sympathy, whatever. But don't tell yourself this is only about him. Take care of yourself, Dr. Cuddy. Goodbye for now."

"Goodbye." Cuddy hung up and looked at the cat. "Are we going to be all right, Belle?" The white cat bumped her hand and gave a short purr. Cuddy's smile was weak, but it was there. "Thanks. I feel so much better for your vote."

Still, as she threw away the damp tissues and headed for the door, she did feel a little better.