Chapter X~ Why me?
Disclaimer~ I do not own Hetalia.
I raced down the hallways at godspeed, swerving down every corner til I met Room 21. The room I was destined to share with whom ever inhabited it at the moment. Angry puffs of air blew out of my mouth as I hyperventilated, I was almost 100% sure my face was as crimson red as a tomato. I put the key in the lock and turned. Only to find the three bastards just right where they were
Italy, my fucking treacherous brother of mine. Still wondering how we are related still.
Germany, the Potato Bastard who I have yet to find an effective way for him to die a painful death, without getting in trouble.
And Spain, ...I have no words for him.
And the first thing I did was wake all three fuckers up from their sleep. Why? You might ask.
Because even though there were four perfectly fine beds. The German rapist decided it was fine to have my brother in his fucking bed. Not that they were doing anything in particular, they were sound asleep. But like hell, I was going to have a peaceful nights sleep with my brother cuddling his bastard of a boyfriend in the same room and my ex-boyfriend sleeping in the same room as me while I'm obviously single...
Does that make sense?
It does now.
~.Oo0oO.~
"FRATELLOOO~! Please stop! Ve~ your ruining everything!" Veneziano cried as I dashed forward to whack that potato bastard upside the head. The only thing getting in the way was Vene holding me back onto my arm like a life preserver and Hungary and Austria blocking my way to the demon from hell.
How I woke them up? Easy, first you strip the covers off the two of them... only to find that they were both naked... well the potato bastard was half-naked and my brother had no shame and was completely naked. And the next thing I did was pull the fire alarm which triggered a loud siren that resonated throughout the building.
Yeah I panicked, hoping the police would arrive, not Hungary and Austria in their nightgowns (Yes, Austria wore a nightgown. Go figure.)
Next, Feliciano and his "lover" woke up. Then, I grabbed Spain's axe, only god knows why he brought it with him, and I charged at perpetrator and they both dodged it.
CRASH!
Dammit! I have no idea why I missed but I broke the entire bed frame which collapsed. Then, the axe refused to get out of the comfort of the bed frame which was now just rubble. It was too damn heavy! And that only aggravated me more.
The rest was a blur actually. Blah blah blah, Feli cried some more, the German bastard tried to console him while raging at me, and Spain slept through the entire crisis on the other side of the room. It wasn't until Hungary stormed in screamed causing all our ears to bleed, did the peacefully sleeping Spaniard woke up a little cranky.
"Romano! What are doing?! Look at the mess you've made!" Hungary cried. Austria just stood there in shock since Hungary was in motion.
"Ugh... it's you again." I grimaced at her. "What do you want, cagna?"
"Lovi, stop insulting Miss Hungary! It's rude and mean~!"
"No. Waking me up while shrieking like a muchacha is mean, Feli~" Spain said broodingly, as he sat upright on his bed glaring at us all. His Spanish accent laced so velvetly and thick, I couldn't helped but admire... a little. I don't know where in those words spoken in pure hatred did Hungary start drooling but the rest of us were genuinely scared to death. So petrified, I think Veneziano wet his pants and clung onto the potato bastard saying sorry in Italian over and over and over...
Anyways, I was pretty adamant on killing Germany and there's no way I'm murdering my brother in the process so...
"Feli! Get away from him!" I screeched. Hungary, finally, snapped and blatantly stole my axe and started reprimand me.
"Romano! Why are you making such a ruckus at 4 in the morning?!"
"The potato bastard and Feli slept in the same bed together ...naked!"
"Tsk Tsk. THAT IS NO EXCUSE MISTER."
"Didn't you hear me? It's illegal I tell you! Vene is just too stupid!" She just sighed.
"I'm afraid we have no spare bedrooms, I apologize for that. So you'll have to make do and share a bed with Spain." She replied, not so disappointed.
"What?!" I spoke sharply and cold.
"Que?"
"Romano, you brought this upon yourself. You've completely destroyed this bunk bed! I must ask, did you want this incident to happen for just that reason?"
"NO."
"Ah, right I forgot your not that bright. But this is genius. Spain I'm confiscating your axe. Please refrain from bringing lethal weapons into my house. I shall return it to you after the Games end. Tata~!" She said as she left, locking the door leaving all of us with a face full of shock.
I'mNotSleepingWithSpain.I'mNotSleepingWithSpain.I' . . .SPAIN.
I'm sure Spain and Germany can fit into one bed together... maybe. And besides Feli's my brother, he can't betray me. That's like treason. He wouldn't... would he?
~.Oo0oO.~
How did I end up here?
In bed with Spain. AGAIN.
"Romano, I'm not going to touch you."
"Who said you could?!" Spain said out of no where. Not because I was quivering and nervous or anything. Spain sighed. Goddammit, when is the earthquake of emotions going to end?
"Romano. I know you hate me..."
Check.
"...and I know this is the last place you want to be in..."
Check.
"...and I know I was wrong... so...I just want to say- Romano! At least look at me when I'm talking to you!"
Hmph! Instead, I gave him my back. I bit my lip. Okay... I'm done crying, oh shit I got my shirt wet and my cheeks and chin. I can't imagine what I must look like now. Probably more of a mess than the broken bed. I don't want to hear him. Spain stood silent for a little while before he jerked my head to look at him. Ow...ow...ow...
"Hey-!"
"Romano, just listen to me for a minute. Lo siento, but I've been wanting to speak to you for a long time now and I'm at my wit's end. Can't we be just friends?"
"Hnnn...what?"
"I don't want us to be enemies. I want us to be friends. You've been acting like you hate my guts and you can but..." He thought for a while. "Isn't it kind of childish to hold a grudge for over a century?" He tempted
I gulped. "Fine! We're friends!" I said outraged. I'm not a child! Those three words brought a grin onto Spain's face. That manipulative bastard. "And not the type of friends you and France are! Not friends with benefits!" I made very clear.
"Si, si! Gracias Romano!" He hugged me pretty tight then. "That makes me sooo happy."
I twitched my left eye. Why was he so happy on being just friends with me? I'm not too happy about it.
"Gahh, get off of me! No hugging!"
"Hm?" He looked wide-eyed at me. "But we're friends, si?"
...how can I argue with that?
I still fucking hate him. When's morning? I'm probably not going to sleep a wink tonight with him here.
~.Oo0oO.~
I slept like a baby. Or so I was told by my brother. I wouldn't say it was a good night's sleep, but considering that Spain wasn't asleep lazily next to me like I expected. I was beginning to worry. Still, I didn't have the energy to deal with a lot of difficult stuff today which included eating breakfast, standing up, opening my eyes, Spain. Nuff' said.
Wait... am I being friend zoned? Fuck, I better not be. Suddenly, I remembered exactly what happened last night. This is exactly why I hate being just friends with Spain and I hope that didn't give you the implication that I want to be more than friends because I DON'T. Okay, fuckers?
Hungary had all of us meet in the Auditorium for an announcement. God, I swear this is worse than the first fucking day of school. Imagine having Hungary as an assistant principal and Austria as principal...
*shudders*
"Good Morning Everyone. I hope you all had your beauty sleep." She announced.
Fuck beauty sleep. I look gorgeous all the time. I don't need sleep, bitches.
Neeee...what was she saying? Oh yeah the Questionnaire I took yesterday! Okay Romano, eyes open annnd listen!
Oh look she has a presentation ready. How nice...
"Today, we will reveal the results of your compatibility questionnaire. Above you will see a PowerPoint presentation. Please wait patiently for all the couples I have chosen."
Names popped up on the screen almost immediately and everyone leaned over to find their match. Let's see...
Lithuania + Poland
Turkey + Greece
Hong Kong + Taiwan
France + England
Austria + Hungary
...
Cuba + Canada
Prussia + Hungary
Wait, why did Hungary's name come up twice?! When she saw those names come up she gawked at it in surprise. Then, went to find where Prussia was I assume. Why is she the only one who has a threesome?!
Switzerland + Lichtenstein
Spain + Northern Italy
Germany + Southern Italy
Netherlands + Belgium
Romania + Hungary
OH WAIT WAIT WHAT THE FUCK.
WHY DOES VENE'S NAME COME FIRST?!
I ignored the rest of the names that popped up and focused on my own and I need to set my priorities straight. I think I need glasses... do my eyes deceive me? ... D-do I see Germany and Me together?
Not possible.
He hates Pasta.
And Spain with Veneziano...
I gulped. Please let this be a dream please.
"Ve~ why did I get Big Brother Spain? Germany didn't you write sausages on your quiz?" My brother asked.
"No. I wrote pasta because I knew you'd write it. You wrote sausages, didn't you?"
"Yes..." Italy said sadly. "But still how did you get Germany, Lovi~?"
"OI! DO I LOOK LIKE I FUCKING KNOW! I GUESS YOUR GERMAN BASTARD LIKES BONDAGE THEN!" I growled, seething in anger.
Let me be clear on one thing and one thing only. WE ARE NOT COMPATIBLE. Luckily, the potato bastard got a migraine and left to find some beer. Leaving me to deal with Feliciano alone. Can't blame him though, fratello's being a real pain in the ass.
"Lovi~ how could you?! You know how I feel about Germany!" Feli cried. "Its not faaair~!"
"Goddammit Feli, do you think I want the macho potato?"
"Ve~ well I don't see why not."
"For fuck's sake, I didn't do it on purpose! I just didn't want to be paired with Spain!"
"So you did do it on purpose!"
"Eh... in a way... yes BUT THAT DID NOT MEAN I WANTED THAT BASTARD! I wrote Austria on my quiz!"
That was kind of loud. I saw Austria turn his head to our direction in astonishment.
"Fratellooo, Austria's German sort of, and there's no way Hungary would let you~"
"Well I realize the situation now, so thank you mister obvious!"
I yelled. God, my comebacks are getting worse by the second. Feliciano clearly appeared upset. Maybe more than me. Disappointed as well. But then he thought for a while.
"Ve~ well then maybe being Spain's partner won't be so bad."
"What?" I said deadpanned.
"Well everyone says he has a nice-"
"Feli stop! What do you mean? You like Germany." I can't believe I'm encouraging this.
"I do but he's not my partner. Spain is." What kind of logic is this?
"But you know how I feel about Spain!?" I harshly whispered because Netherlands was leaning over me to eavesdrop... bastard.
"And that's why you won't mind fratello! I'm doing you a favor and stealing big brother away from you~"
"Feli, for the freakin last time, I'm your one and ONLY big brother!"
"But he's more brotherly ve~"
"Feli, what the actual fuck? No, never mind that! Stay away from Spain!"
"Ve~ why? Don't tell me you still like him?"
"N-no! Hell no! I don't!"
"Then why?"
"Because... because..."
"Well until you give me a reason, I'm going to hug Spain now~ Ciao fratello!" He replied as he skipped over to Spain who was currently talking to Prussia and France and embraced him tightly. I tried hard to ignore the painful throbbing in my chest as I stared at the two.
My fists clenched and unclenched as I saw Spain respond with a bright grin on his face, returning Feli's hug. I'm not gonna lie, I felt like the loneliest piece of shit in the world. Something about Feli always made me feel worthless but now was different... it was worse. My eyes stings and I stormed off once I saw Spain glance at me. Fuck, I don't want him to see me like this!
I fast walked into the bathroom where no one could see and I looked into the mirror.
Why did my face looked so frustratingly red?
Why did I look like I was on the verge of tears?
Why did Belgium just flush and come out of that stall?
"Ack Femke!" I shouted.
"Roma! W-what are you doing here?!"
"I- uh what do you mean what I'm doing here! This is the boys rest-...rooom." For the first time, I noticed my surroundings. Pink tiles, marble sink counters, pink floral wallpaper, sleek silver faucets, flower printed tissue paper, perfume scented air, a vase filled with daffodils, and Belarus just came out of another stall... "Dammit!"
"Romano, why are you crying?"
"I'm not!" She pinched my cheek.
"C'mon I know you better than you think I know." She chimed.
"Ow! I got paired with the potato bastard. Happy?"
"So? I got paired with my brother. That doesn't exactly make me very happy. Plus he's running away from me now. Have you seen him?"
I shook my head vigorously.
"Now tell Femke everything. Why is my precious Roma upset? Although I think I already have an idea-"
"IT'S NOT BECAUSE OF SPAIN!" I bellowed.
"Uh..." Belgium paused and looked momentarily startled. She, then, pinched my cheek again. "I wasn't going to say Spain and don't you dare raise your voice at me!" Tears formed on the corners of my eyes. It's too bad she noticed them as well. "Oh...aw Roma. You're really hurting aren't you?"
I nodded, biting my lip.
((A/N~ ...hiatus...
11/16
Okai this had been sitting lazily in my document manager for 2 months. So I decided to upload it before it gone forever.
Rereading this makes me feel somewhat disappointed in my writing skills over the summer and laughing til my stomach hurts. I mean this had completely turned into a crack fic already without me noticing. So, let me apologize for that. Romano is such a sassy country here. Can't believe I was actually hoping for angst.
This was so painful for me to read. I am sorry. And if Im honest. Im probably not gonna continue with this unless my Spamano inspiration comes back. Which I do have now... but for another fanfic coming soon! ^^ Stay tuned. I still love you all.
Thank you for reviewing! *kiss* Muah! Im so overly affectionate~ I will reply to any reviewers who review after this chapter because it might be the last one. Then again, Im so indecisive so... ))