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Drowning in Agony

"Yo, BB! Are you finished yet?" Cyborg called, banging his fist on the bathroom door.

"Just a few more minutes!" Beast Boy shouted back.

Beast Boy leaned against the bathroom door and sighed. There was a little 'accident' a few days ago. All the bathrooms in the Tower got flooded due to an unexplainable water surge. Cyborg and Robin had managed to fix the main bathroom in the hallway, but the other bathrooms in the Tower were still out of order. So now all of the Titans were fighting for this bathroom.

Beast Boy walked over to the sink and scrubbed his hands with soap vigorously. After a few minutes, he rinsed his hands with water. No matter how hard he scrubbed, he still couldn't get the nasty green color off his skin. He wondered if he cut his skin at the surface, it would heal back in Caucasian or green skin. With his luck, it would probably grow back in green skin. However, it doesn't hurt to try. Maybe he'll experiment on it later.

Beast Boy wiped his hands dry and pulled his leather gloves back over his hands. Beast Boy tightened the straps on his gloves and peered in the mirror. Suddenly, the bathroom door slammed open, making Beast Boy jump away from the mirror in shock.

"I can't wait any longer, man! I really need to use the bathroom!" Cyborg said angrily, striding into the bathroom.

Beast Boy quickly recovered from his shock and said, "Why do you even need to use the bathroom? You're half-robot. You don't need to bathe, brush teeth, wash hands or anything."

"I was working on my car in the garage. Turns out that my baby had a gas leak. Now I need to wash the oil off my hands." Cyborg explained, turning on the tap.

"You could just use the kitchen sink." Beast Boy pointed out.

Cyborg sighed. "Starfire busted it again. She mistook a caterpillar for some kind of alien monster and shot a massive starbolt at it."

Cyborg finished washing his hands and turned back to Beast Boy. "What were you doing in here just now, man? I saw you staring at the mirror."

Beast Boy stiffened. Crap. Quick, think of an excuse! What would Beast Boy say? "Uhh, I was just checking out my good looks in the mirror!"

Cyborg snorted. "Yeah, right. You can't even get a date! Besides, I'm waaay better looking than you."

"I can too get a date! And girls would totally go for a guy like me! You know chicks dig the ears!" Beast Boy retorted.

"You mean those elf ears? They look weird and freakish! And you're green, man, who would go out with you?" Cyborg asked rhetorically.

Beast Boy winced internally. Ouch. That comment really hurt. Is that how everyone sees him? If this is how his best friend views him, does the rest of the world sees him as a hideous and terrifying monster?

"Now, I have the good looks and charm. Not to mention-" Cyborg continued to compare himself to Beast Boy as he exited the bathroom and pointed out Beast Boy's each and every fault. He even made a snide comment at Beast Boy's fang.

Beast Boy felt his heart drop lower and lower with each word that came out of Cyborg's mouth. He didn't think that his imperfections were so obvious. Beast Boy followed Cyborg down the hallway towards the common room. Beast Boy knew Cyborg was right though, he was only pointing out the truth. The horrible and nasty truth. So Beast Boy wasn't mad at Cyborg for saying these things. He also knew that Cyborg was only saying these things to prove that he was better than Beast Boy, which he was totally fine with. Because Cyborg is better than him. Heck, everyone and everything on this planet is better than him.

They finally stopped in front of the common room doors. Cyborg turned around and grinned at Beast Boy. "Aw, don't worry, BB. I'm sure you can find a girlfriend eventually. Come on, I'm gonna squash you in Rocket Racers 2.0, grass stain!" Cyborg ran into the common room and grabbed the game controllers from the sofa.

Beast Boy followed and shouted a half-hearted insult at Cyborg. Beast Boy appreciated Cyborg for trying to cheer him up, but he was just trying to instill false hope in Beast Boy.

After a few minutes of playing, Cyborg paused the game with his controller.

"Dude, what did you do that for? I was in the middle of kicking your butt!" Beast Boy exclaimed.

Cyborg chuckled. "Yeah, right!" Cyborg looked up and checked that the other Titans in the room were preoccupied and could not hear their conversation. Cyborg lowered his voice and said, "Look, I've been meaning to talk to ya, B. I noticed you have been acting a little…well, off. So, are you alright?"

Beast Boy's eyes widened momentarily. He noticed?! "What do you mean, Cy? Nothing's wrong!"

"Well, you were kinda quiet these past few days." Cyborg replied.

"Oh, I was just uh, thinking and stuff." Beast Boy said.

Cyborg snorted. "You can think? I guess we don't have to invest in a brain for you after all."

"Hey!" Beast Boy cried angrily.

Cyborg rolled his eyes before getting back to the matter at hand. "Seriously, man, what's up with you? I didn't even see you play any video games yesterday!" Cyborg said, looking concerned.

Beast Boy sighed, "Okay, okay, Cy, you got me. I was planning my greatest prank ever to pull on Raven!"

Cyborg groaned. "Do you ever give up? Raven is grumpy enough as it is without you pulling a prank on her."

Beast Boy inwardly sighed in relief that Cyborg fell for the story. He made a few slip ups this week, but he didn't think anyone would notice. He had to be more careful. "Raven might act like she hates being pranked, but I'm sure deep down she enjoys it."

"Did you hit your head or something? Because I think we need to get your brain checked." Cyborg said in reply.

The conversation soon turned towards food and videogames. Not long after, Beast Boy and Cyborg were arguing on whether meat or tofu was healthier.

Beast Boy slouched on the sofa in the common room. The rest of the Titans had gone to bed not long ago. Beast Boy said that he wanted to play some video games for a while before heading to bed. The Titans thought nothing of it as it was typical Beast Boy behavior. However, in truth, Beast Boy wanted to relax for a while and think about the things that have been bugging him since the talk with Cyborg. He really needed to be more careful around the Titans. If they noticed his weird behavior, they might start asking questions and that was something he didn't want to happen.

It was getting harder and harder everyday to maintain the façade. He was sick of acting happy every day. He couldn't even brood or be moody. If he did, the Titans would think that he was replaced by some alien clone. Beast Boy was envious of the other Titans lives. They always complain of the hardships and pain they endured, but that was nothing compared to Beast Boy's life.

Robin often complained about being in Batman's shadow and always seen as Batman's sidekick. However, he was respected and recognized by civilians and members of the hero community. Meanwhile Beast Boy was always seen as the green metahuman, the green freak that hung out with the Titans. He always encountered civilians that didn't even know his name or who he is. And he had been a hero in Jump City for almost three years!

Cyborg showed his hatred for his half-robot body frequently. He usually got into those moods during certain holidays or celebrations. He would hide in the garage and tinker with his car. Beast Boy tried to talk to him once, but Cyborg flew into a rage and started yelling about how unfortunate he was, being half-robot, rejected by society and so on. Beast Boy went through exactly what Cyborg did. Okay, maybe except for the half-robot part, but at least Cyborg still looked normal, or rather, half-normal. Beast Boy was green, all over, from head to toe! Forget rejected by society, he was most probably hated by everyone on this planet.

Starfire was always seen as the happy bubbly alien, but she had gone through many hardships as well. They weren't as bad as Beast Boy, but bad enough. She was betrayed by her own sister and given to the Gordanians as a peace treaty. However, she was able to put all that behind her and put on a joyful and happy smile every day. Beast Boy was envious of how she could forgive and forget so easily, which was something he could never and wouldn't do.

Raven was the dark and emotionless empath. She always said that she couldn't feel or have emotions because she would lose control of her powers. Beast Boy wished he could be like that. That way he wouldn't feel pain or anything.

The Titans didn't realize how fortunate they were. Beast Boy would give anything to be someone else, anyone, as long as it wasn't Beast Boy. That wouldn't be possible of course, because he didn't know how to be anyone else but Beast Boy. There was also the issue of his skin color. Even if he wore a holoring, the effects wouldn't last forever.

I guess I just have to live with being Beast Boy until the day I die, Beast Boy thought grimly.