Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight, but we do have a few tattoos...and there might even be a Twilight one in the mix somewhere.


Removed - Chapter 6

EPOV

"Fuck! I mean, sorry, shit! Damn it! I'm sorry, Dr. Swan. I just didn't expect to see you here."

I'm such an asshole!

She laughs and places her hand on my bicep, completely drawing my attention away from the mess I just made. "Relax, Edward. I've been known to throw down a few cuss words from time to time. These are not virgin ears," she whispers, as if she's telling me her deepest darkest secret.

I'm still looking down at her hand on my arm; when she gives it a little squeeze before letting go, I spring into action, looking for a sponge while trying to play off my embarrassment.

"Oh, yeah, of course. Let me clean this up real fast. Alice will tear my balls off if she finds out I've already defiled her kitchen."

Dr. Swan picks up my mug as I wipe up the spilled beer and rinse out the sponge. "I'll tell you another secret, Edward. This kitchen has already been defiled. Alice told me so just before you walked in. Does that make you feel any better?"

"Hell, no!"

She burst out with another laugh and I can't help but laugh along with her. When I go to grab my mug, she quickly takes it, shaking her head. "I owe you another drink."

"No, Dr. Swan. I can drink that one, don't worry about it."

"First, please call me Bella when we're out of my office. Second, because of me, your Black and Tan's ruined. Let me fix you another one."

"You know what a Black and Tan is and how to fix one?" I raise my eyebrows at her in disbelief.

"How do you think I paid my way through medical school?"

I watch in amazement as Dr. Swan—I mean, Bella—pours the Bass Ale into my mug, stopping when it's half full. Holding the spoon, bottom up, over the mug, she expertly pours the Guinness next, resulting in both beers staying in their places and not mixing, hence the name.

"Now, that's a fucking perfect Black and Tan! Well done, Bella, thank you."

"My pleasure, Edward," she says, smiling up at me.

Piss, I forgot which president I stopped at.

"Can I fix you something to drink?" I can't help but test her. Yeah, she can make my favorite drink, but if she says she wants a Mojito or some shit like that, I may have to end my crush right here and now.

Yeah, right.

"I'm going to have the drink I messed up for you. I can't, in good judgment, let alcohol go to waste, especially when it involves a good stout."

Is it too soon to ask her to marry me?

Bella clinks her mug to mine before taking a long pull. I'm blatantly staring at her throat as she swallows her beer, when I hear a squeal coming from the living room.

"Eddie, can I open your gift now?"

Thankful for the distraction and that Bella didn't catch me perving on her drinking skills, I yell back, "I'll be right there, Alice!"

I manage to find my balls somewhere and gently grasp Bella's elbow. "Come on," I say, nodding toward the living room, "you don't want to miss this."

As we walk into the living room, a shrill squeal fills the room; a second later, Alice is leaping into my arms. I have no choice but to catch her.

"Oh, Edward! I love it! I've been waiting to get that book back ever since Jasper gave it to you for graduation!" she exclaims, as I put her back on the ground.

"I was so disappointed when we didn't get it as a wedding gift! I thought you'd lost it or jizzed all over it!" She holds Madonna's Sex book like it's a precious gem, smoothing her hand over the worn cover.

"I figured the plane tickets would come in much handier for your honeymoon. I was sure you and Jasper had the sex part down pat," I tease, nudging her with my shoulder.

"Is that Vanilla Ice?" I look over to see Bella giggling, as she and Alice flip through the book.

Jasper and I found that book in my basement back in 1996. I assumed it belonged to my dad. I hope it belonged to my dad, because it squicks me out to think of my mom buying a book of erotica. I stole it from my dad and gifted it to Jasper on his fifteenth birthday. Jasper gave it back to me when we graduated, and we've passed it back and forth to each other ever since. Emmett is jealous as shit over that stupid book, but Jas and I both know that if we ever let him get his grubby paws on it, we'll never see it again.

"There's also a gift card in the front," I tell her, not wanting her—or Bella—to think I'm a cheap ass.

"How about another Black and Tan?" Jasper asks, snatching the book out of Alice's hands as he walks past her. "I think we need a good trip down memory lane and I haven't showed you my man cave, yet!"

"Sounds good," I reply, following him back into the kitchen, leaving Alice behind, an angry scowl on her face tapping her face as she taps her foot. I'm sure she'll let Jasper have it later. She always gets the last word.

The evening goes smoothly and the drinks flow freely. By the time the majority of the crowd has said their goodbyes, I'm feeling completely relaxed and a bit too tipsy to drive home. Apparently, I'm not the only one. Bella's sitting across from me on the back deck, and her hooded eyes tell me she's not feeling any pain either.

We're all casually talking and drinking when a lingering question pops into my head.

"So, Jas, how did you meet Dr. Swan?"


A/N:

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