A/N: Thanks for all of your support

"I'm sorry James, but I can't" Lily said somehow it started to rain harder "I understand what you are asking so I don't want to lead you on for even a second." Lily could tell that she was hurting him, but she knew it would hurt worst if she waited, maybe even destroy him. "James I know that you love me, and understand how much you want this, maybe even need this. But I don't deserve you; I could never love you enough, not like this"

"That's okay I don't care" James said quickly

"No James I will not do that to you, you deserve someone that will give everything they are to you. I'm not in a place where I can do that, and I don't know how long it will take" James looked like he was about to cry and it was breaking her heart. She almost gave in, almost.

"It's ok" James said taking a deep breath "You know, that was pretty much what I expected so" James looked torn when he said this, tears started to fall from Lily eyes. James grabbed the back of her neck and pulled her into a hug his chin on the top of her head

"But I want you to understand Lily that there is not one second that I won't be thinking of you. From the moment I saw you I thought that I had to have you, and the more I watch you the deeper I fell in love with you until you were everything. I've tried so hard to have you, but if this is what you want, if you want me to stop. I'll stop fighting for you, because I love you, I'll let you go"

Lily started to cry "I'm sorry James"

James held her tighter "its okay you can't help what you feel"

"It would have been better if you never fell in love with me" Lily said it didn't look like the rain was ever going to a stop.

"Even if I can't have you, I am a better person because I loved you. You saved me Lily more then you'll ever know" James said there was a loud thunder making both of them jump, Lily let go of him

"Lily I love you so much I will always think of you, I will always wait for you , and I will always be yours even if you can never be mine" James kissed her forehead and Lily felt James' tears fall on her, and her heart started to break. James handed her the petaless flower and walked away. Even though he was doing so well to hide the fact that he was crying she could tell that she just broke his heart.

Sirius was walking back to the castle, but stopped 'I can't go back' Sirius thought. He looked around and saw Lily and James standing by a tree. James looked like he was pouring his heart out to her, and she looked like she wanted to run away. 'She is going to break his heart' Sirius thought getting angry he was about to walk over to them when he stopped 'I can't stop her' He thought feeling helpless

"I HATE THIS" Remus screamed after he ran away it started to rain, then Sirius started to scream his name, but he couldn't face him each time Sirius would say his name it would tear at his broken heart because he knew that he could never have him.

"ENOUGH" Remus yelled hitting a tree the only way he could get away from Sirius was to run into the forest. Remus hated that someone had this much power over him, he hated thinking of him all the time, wondering what he was doing, what he was thinking about, if it was ever about him, only realizing now that he could never be thinking of him, and never would. His heart started to hurt with every pasting moment it was getting worse he waited for it to reach its maximum but it never did, the pain never stop, and it never would.

"I CANT DO THIS" Remus screamed he started throwing up everything he ate that day. When there was nothing left to throw up he started gaging and throwing up nothing it hurt so badly that ever bone in his body aced and burned it felt like his soul was ripping in two.

"WHY IS HE DOING THIS TO ME?" He screamed he wanted, no need him to like so badly, and the ripping was getting louder until it consumed him. He felt like he was in a dark hole, and there was no way out.

Remus was running away from something, he couldn't remember what it was, but there was blood everywhere, it was his blood. His arm hurt so badly but he couldn't remember why. He looked down at his arm there was a hug bite there.

"What the heck" he said he stopped running and he remembered again, the biggest wolf he even seen was running after him. He bit him and he was still running after him. Remus heard something behind him, and he started to run again. Whatever was running after him caught up with him and jumped on him he started to bite him again and again he didn't know if he was ever going to stop. There was so much pain he wanted it to end, not one part of his body was not in pain. He couldn't remember when he stopped or left, but he could never forget what came next. He didn't really know how to explain what happen next it felt like his soul was ripping in two. He only been burn once or twice before, but that was nothing compared to what he was filling now it felt like his entire body was on fire, and his bones aced so badly. He wanted to scream but he couldn't open his mouth. He started to hear a soft roar but it started to get louder until it felt like his ears were going to bleed. He tried to cover his ears but the sound was inside of him there was no way to cover the sound. His heart started to beat faster and faster it felt like it was going to explode but it never did.

BANG! Remus woke up from the thunder he repeatedly had the same dream over and over the past few days. He didn't remember why he started dreaming about his past.

BANG! Lily suddenly woke up from the loud thunder. She hadn't slept peacefully in days every time she closed her eyes she saw his. 'If this is supposed to be the right thing then why does it hurt so badly' Lily thought to herself. She looked out the window, she always loved the rain; it washed over everything making everything fresh again. She wanted to be clean to, of all the emotions that were eating at her. Lily started to put on her shoes 'maybe the rain can wash all the bad things away to' she thought. Adrenaline rushed through her she ran down the stairs, but she couldn't get outside fast enough so she disaporated outside. When she landed on the ground she felt the rain fall on her instantly soaking her to the core. The fresh air filled her lungs and she was filled with happiness. She started to forget why she was so sad. She closed her eyes and twirl in the rain. She wanted it to rain forever continuously washing away all of her worries and regrets. She laid on the grass and waiting for the rain to stop and slowly it did. As the rain ending she remembered why she was so sad, but this time it ran deeper inside of her continuously eating at everything she was. She continued to lay there until she became more cold and empty as before. She signed and walked back to the castle to get ready for the day.

A/N: btw if you guys review and give me feed back I'm more likely to update faster; just saying if anyone wanted to be able to read it faster or whatever.

P.S: I know I made a lot of grammar errors, but if any one has no idea what I'm trying to say then let me no.

P.S.S: You guys suck (me sticking my tough out) .

P.S.S.S: why don't you review more? There is no reason not to, because it takes less than 5 seconds. All you have to type is 'I liked it', 'I hated it', 'you stink', 'you the worst ever' whatever, just write something. Come on guys, girls, goblins, blue what ever you are, or choose to be, just type those three little words that are apparently really hard to type.

(Sign) just forget it ;( do whatever the heck you want