A/N: Sorry it took so long to put up this chp hope you enjoy it

James roamed the halls with a heavy heart, he knew that Lily asked him to let her go but he didn't think that he could. Everything around him reminded him of her. He would usually go talk to Remus or Sirius, but he couldn't find them, he could check the map but he wasn't sure if they wanted to talk it him because Sirius was in love with him and Remus was in love with Sirius. He didn't know how it happen but he ended up at the library door. This was where Remus spent 80 percent of his time. He decided to go in and find him anyways. And found him in the back at a table reading a book, James sat down.

"Can I talk to you" James asked

Remus put his book down "Yeah sure what do you want to talk about"

"Um… err… can we go somewhere else so no one will hear us?" James asked

"Sure" Remus said shutting his book and following James. They ended up in the Astronomy Tower

"So what's up?" Remus asked

"Lily said no again" James said looking broken

"What's different this time" Remus asked

"This time I gave her all of me" James said laying on the edge of the tower

"Prongs get down you could fall" Remus said coming to his side

"I'm already broken what's the difference?" James asked turning to look at the ground

"Please Prongs you're scaring me" Remus said trying to pull him down

"Stop it you're going to make me lose my balance" James said pushing Remus away

"James Just come down" Remus said

"Fine I'll come down" James said trying to get up, but he started to lose his balance and began to fall

"JAMES!" Remus yelled trying to grab his hand, barely missing him by an inch.

...

Lily was in the common room studying for potions test that was in two weeks.

"Hey Lily do you want to play a round of…" Ivy asked she was one of Lily's best friends they meet in first year and was friends ever sense

"No I have to study for this test" Lily said cutting her off

"You didn't even hear what I was going to say" Ivy said sitting next to her

"I need to study for my potions test."

"That's not until two weeks"

"I know but I don't really understand it completely" Lily said continually repeating the terms in her mind over and over. The true was that she was ready to take this test an hour ago, but study was a lot easer then thinking of James and how much she hurt him.

"What's going on?" Ivy asked

"Just studying why" Lily said

"You're the star student in potions, I bent if you didn't want to study you could still pull an A-minus" Ivy said thinking for a minute than continuing "Well a side from Severus"

'Severus…when was the last time I talking to him' Lily thought 'I think it's be about a month' Lily's heart started to ach to see him again. She missed the accomplishment she felt when she made him smile or laugh. She remembered wanting to know more about him wanting to always protect him; she wanted to save him from his world. She remember all those nights she couldn't sleep she would go outside by the tree, their tree; after sitting there for about 30 minus he would show up and they would talk until dawn. The memories started to surround her and close in on her, reminding her she could never have that again until it consumed her.

"I need some air" Lily said running out of the room and down the stairs

She didn't know where she was going but she wanted to run away from all the memories that were eating at her. She found herself under the astronomy tower, she started to hear voices.

"Lily said no again" James voice floated down to her

"What is different this time" someone asked him

Lily ran out 'He's everywhere' Lily starting walking down the hall ways. Willing no one to talk or look at her. She found herself in the dungeon, and went to hind under the stairs. She put her face in her hand and thought 'what is stopping me from letting James in?' the memories of Severus appeared in her head again 'Maybe because thinks ended so badly' Lily got up and started looking for Severus

...

Severus walked along the lake he was having a hard day today mostly because he couldn't stop thinking of Lily. Lily was everything to him, and every time he saw her he would die a little more inside. The only reason he stop seeing her was because somehow his mother found out that she was a mudblood. She told him that if he didn't stop seeing her, she would pull him out of school, but he knew she would do a lot more than that. He figured it was better to see her from a distance then never see her again.

The wind started to blow harder so he pulled his coat tighter against him. It has been about a month sense he last talked to her, and every day that pasted he grew colder inside. When he was little he always felt this way, growing up in the family that he did he don't know any better. He remembered all ways being alone, playing alone, and crying alone; until the day he met her. 'She was all ways so kind and nice to me; before I met her I never knew that someone could be so kind' Severus though continuing 'she was the brilliant sunlight that drove away the endless winter that I was force to repeat over and over again.'

Severus could fell that bitter cold returning he wanted so badly to see her smiling at him, laughing at him. Because even though he never told her, she was the only thing that was keeping him from falling to pieces. The worst days were summers they were long and hard because his family keep pushing him to join Tom; whenever he said no they would threaten and hurt him. Every time they did she was always there even if she didn't know it, she saved him. He tried so hard to cover up the marks they made, but somehow she would always see right through him. Every time she asked him why he didn't tell her, he would say he didn't want her to worry about him.

The thing that scared him the most was how much he thought of her, she was in everything that he did, every time he saw her he would melt inside. He wanted so badly to run away with her, but he knew that he never could because no matter how many times she said she could, she could never save him from his world. He would be a foul if he thought she could. No matter how badly he wanted it, there was always something that was going to stop them or someone was going to find them sooner or later. And he knew as soon as they found them they would kill her and bring him back.

He knew that he had to let her free to save her that was the only way, and it was killing him to think that someone else would have her. He wanted her so badly, wanted to always be the one to make her laugh, heck he wanted to have children with her. But he knew that he couldn't protect her not from everything, and he knew that if anything happen to her because of him he wouldn't be able to live with himself.

He sat down at their tree the memories of her clouded his mind making it so he didn't see her walking up to him.

"Severus" Lily said,