PG: Autobotschic is responsible for this idea. She was nice enough to message me with the idea, and I thought it was a gold mine!

REVIEWS

Anonymous BW FG: I think those two really will destroy the Earth!

Autobotschic: XD you must wait no longer! Good! What they even doing sleeping at a time like this! The world might be ending! XD He'll touch who he wants! XD

Mimic smirked evilly as he steadily made his way over to Unicronia's "Box of objects not to touch". He smirked as he pulled out what he was looking for. No longer could the evil femme ignore him! No longer would she attack him as he tried to flatter her! He would get what he wanted. He would frag the lights out of that femme, or he would offline trying!

Shadow Stalker watched as the blue and silver femme tested out her new arm. "You out did yourself Ratchet."

"Get out. If I see you or Wheeljack here in the next week, I'm giving you to Perceptor, and letting him dissect you to his spark's content!"

"Have fun, Shadow!"

"Don't call me that! You're just lucky I can't get up right now!" Shadow Stalker yelled.

"Yeah, it's hard to do that without pedes."

Shadow Stalker glared. "You have a lot more than Sunstreaker to worry about when I'm out of here!"

"Sure!" Unicronia waved as she walked out of the room. "Shadow!"

"AAUUUGHHHH!"

"Shadow Stalker, are you alright?"

Shadow Stalker's helm fell to the side. "Optimus? What are you… wearing?" She smirked as she sent amusement through the bond.

Optimus smirked. "Do you like it?"

Shadow Stalker frowned. "No, no, it's…. nice?"

Optimus smirked as he showed off the huge bodice he had on. "I used Perceptor's growth beam to allow it to fit. Do I look sexy?"

Shadow Stalker sent a purr through the bond. She frowned when she received confusion from Optimus's end. "What's wrong, shadow Stalker?"

"Oh, nothing." Shadow Stalker smirked. "So, Optimus, You want to go a few rounds?"

The Optimus with her smirked. "Hmm." He leaned in for a kiss before Shadow Stalker pushed him away.

"What are you doing? You know we don't kiss."

"Wha- I mean of course. Why don't you remind me what we do?"

Shadow Stalker smirked. "It's kind of hard to do when I don't have pedes, but it's kind of like this. Come closer."

Optimus leaned forward. Shadow Stalker let out a battle cry as she tackled the optimus to the ground. She brought her fist up, and stopped when it was at it's peak. "What's wrong? Aren't you going to fight back? It's not as exciting if you don't join in."

"Umm." Optimus gave a weak shove back.

Shadow Stalker frowned. "What was that? We'll never frag if you don't get me excited enough."

Optimus got a serious look on his face as he shoved her to the ground, and rolled on top of her. "Is that better?"

Shadow Stalker kneed his guts earning a groan. "Oh, are you ready?"

"No." He grunted.

"More?" Shadow Stalker punched his helm. "Come on! We're getting nowhere!" She forced Optimus back under her, and glared. "I'm going to beat the slag out of you, and you'll wish you were never on-lined!"

"Shadow!"

Shadow Stalker glanced up and smiled at the real Optimus standing in the doorway. "Hi Optimus, excuse me as I finish beating the scrap out of this kid!"

"No! Stop!" The figure of Optimus under Shadow Stalker phased away, and Mimic's form took his place. "Just stop! You Psychopath!" He shoved Shadow Stalker off him, and ran out of the room.

Shadow Stalker sat on the ground with a dumbfounded look on her face. "Wow, I didn't expect that?"

Optimus stared down at Shadow Stalker. He sighed as he walked up to her, and picked her up. "What were you doing?"

Shadow Stalker was placed on her berth, and she smiled at Optimus. "I wanted to teach him a lesson. I actually thought he was a Decepticon."

Optimus nodded. "Of course." Optimus sighed ."I don't want you hanging out with Unicronia."

Shadow Stalker frowned. "What? Why not?"

"She's insane. She blew you up! She could have killed you. Did I mention she's insane?"

"You did, but I like to think I'm a little insane as well."

"You two are on two completely different levels. There's a fine line. You're on the good side. Unicronia's on the 'Might destroy the universe if I didn't like it so much' level." Optimus sighed. "Shadow, I know you two might have hit it off, but I'm worried you might blow up, and I'll be the one to have to gather your pieces."

Shadow Stalker nodded. "I understand. I'm not going to listen to you, but I understand."

Optimus sighed. "Just run if Unicronia and Wheeljack are in the same room."

"I'm insane, not stupid." Shadow Stalker laughed.

Unicronia stared at Mimic as he curled himself in a ball, and stowed himself away in the darkest corner of the lab. Which happened to be where Unicronia kept her Genetically modified Koalas. Unicronia sighed as one of the Koaloas crawled onto Mimic's helm, and began chewing on his audio receptors with the new set of insanely sharp teeth it had.

"Mimic, get up."

"No." Mimic glared at Unicronia. "I don't want to, and you can't make me."

Unicronia raised an optic ridge as she walked into her new favorite closet. She grabbed one of the guns, and walked out. She cocked the gun, and pointed it to Mimic. "Get out of the fragging corner. If my Koaloas get sick because of your nasty aft metal, I'll never let you rape Wheeljack again!"

Mimic's optics widened. "Is that-"

"Old age, Carrier fragger"

"No! I can't die old! I'll lose my sex appeal and the dream of Prowl having fun time with my frame will be over!"

Unicronia brought the death ray down. "You're kidding. Your dream is for Prowl to interface with your offlined frame?"

"Well, I want to be sent away in peace. I'm only at peace after I interfaced." Mimic shrugged as he ripped the Koala off his audio receptor, and stood up. "If I could die from an overload, that would be nice too." He set the Koala on a tree.

Unicronia made a disgusted face. "EW. That's disgusting. What the frag is your problem? Sick fragger!" Unicronia aimed her death ray again.

"STOP!"

Unicronia and Mimic turned to the entrance where Shadow Stalker now stood with both of her pedes in place. "Shadow Stalker!" Unicronia smiled. "How are you?"

"That glitch is gonna die! He tried to frag me while disguised as Optimus."

"He fragged Wheeljack while he was disguised as me."

"I've also fragged Optimus!" Mimic smiled.

Shadow Stalker glared. "Excuse me?"

"He said he's fragged Optimus." Unicronia opened a path to Mimic. "Sick him!"

Shadow Stalker glared at Unicronia. "Crossed a boundary."

"Oh, sorry." Unicronia smiled. "I meant, 'Your mission has begun, don't let me down Agent Shadow Stalker."

Shadow Stalker nodded. "You can count on me!"

Mimic frowned as Shadow Stalker slowly stalked closer to him. "NO! No! No! Nooooooo!"

Unicronia brought out a silver and blue gun. "Well, I have to bring him back now."

Shadow Stalker stared at the broken form below her. "Do you have to?"

"Yeah."Unicronia shot a huge glowing orb out of the gun. The orb struck Mimic's frame, and engulfed him in light.

Mimic shot up. "Oh Primus! Please tell me Prowl and I had an amazing interface session."

"No." Unicronia answered.

"NNOOOOO!"