Waking Nightmares

The elevator doors had scarcely opened before Pandora flew out and quickened her pace towards her apartment. A whisper of anticipation was followed by a smile as she peeled her heels off and started jogging.

The closer she got to the door the more the anticipation grew. Suddenly her heart skipped. She pressed her hand against the door and pushed. Breathing deeply as she searched around rooms.

Finnick was home. She couldn't restrain her excitement.

"Pandora?"

Just as she shut the front door she turned to see his silhouette in the darkened living room. Her eyes unwaveringly stared at him. He took a step into the light. His bright green eyes were just as vivid as she remembered.

When she ran towards him he started laughing. His eyebrows rose as she pressed her lips against his and clawed at his back.

"I missed you," she whispered in between kisses, smiling a little as he returned her embrace.

Before she could say anything else he picked her up and quickly returned the kisses on her lips, cheeks and neck. It was only a week since they last seen each other but it felt like another life for Pandora. She eased her way into his gentle grasp and let herself drown in him. Each caress and kiss was a memory that she would hold onto forever.

Afterward, in the darkness of their bedroom she rested close to him and smiled. Her hand relaxed on his chest as she gazed out at the city lights. He tangled his fingers in her hair and sighed.

"I missed you too," he finally whispered.

Her eyes sparkled, "Did you get them settled in?"

Immediately she regretted the question. He shifted away and let her hair slip through his fingers. His eyes stared at the ceiling in thought.

"Yea. I did."

"Don't worry, I'll be right here by your side for the entire thing."

His lips formed a sad smile.

This was the rift in their relationship. The one thing Pandora struggled with. She could help Finnick with anything but there was no way she could understand what it was like to be a mentor, to fear the death of two individuals that are, by all rights, your responsible to help live. Every time she tried to put herself in Finnick's shoes she was lost.

When she saw his pained grimace she wished she could take it back.

"Tomorrow is the Opening Ceremony—I handed them over to the stylists."

Pandora thought about her opening ceremony. The chariots, the confusion she felt. Everything was a blur then, and still was.

"We should get some sleep, I have to get up early."

"Of course," she whispered.

More than anything she wanted to tell Finnick about what Adric had done for her. The film clips of her family, the way it made her feel safer to know that President Snow had kept his end of the bargain intact, that her family was healthy, happy, and unharmed. She yearned to tell him, but Pandora knew she couldn't. What Adric had done was against the terms of her agreement with President Snow, he had broken the rules as a gesture of friendship.

For so long she felt like she was in the dark. She felt pain and loss, but when she saw her family's faces those feelings were eased. Her eyes watered at the thought of them laughing. It was peace of mind. All her misdeeds and sins, all her tragedy would be worth it.

But instead of saying all this she simply turned over. Her cheek pressed against the satin pillow. Her eyelashes softly closed, her muscles relaxed.

It wasn't long before sleep slowly swallowed her.

Click-click-click.

Darkness.

Everywhere the dark closed in on her.

Her eyes shifted from left to right.

"Hello?!" She called. The echo of her voice sent chills down her spine.

Clicking, chaotic and shrill clicking sounded. Then static.

Unnervingly and sluggishly a song started to crescendo. It took her a moment to identity the melody, and when she did her it felt like her lungs were shattering her ribs.

The Anthem of Panem.

No words were sung, only the instruments bellowed through the blackness. Creepily. Engulfing her in a strange symphony.

"Hello?" This time her voice was laced with fear.

"Help!"

A gasp trembled her body.

"Who is that?!"

"Help…"

A male voice.

Her hands swatted through the obscurity. Her feet began moving.

"I'm coming!" She yelled, suddenly she was running.

Whether she was moving forward, backward, or upward she didn't know. All she knew was that she was moving.

With a screech the anthem cut out. Her feet shuffled to a stop. Her eyes looked around aimlessly.

A low hum sounded. Followed by the ignited glimmer of a dull blue light.

This was a light she had seen before. A light that always terrorized her sleep.

In the distance a cylindrical tank filled with glowing blue water appeared. Reflection of the rippling water cascaded through the glass, into the darkness, covering her body.

She knew what was about to happen before it did, but the floating figure in the tank still froze her steps.

"Adric…" she whispered. Her feet started forward.

The blue light against his fair skin and blonde hair made him look like he was glowing.

Her hand pressed against the glass.

When his eyes opened she wasn't scared. She knew this was going to happen.

Bubble simmered from his mouth as he slowly peeled off the mask and stared at her.

"Help me…" his words were muffled underwater.

She remained motionless. Her hand dropped to her side. Her head tilted back.

"HELP ME!"

Pandora awoke with choking wheeze.

Immediately her hands covered her face and eyes. Daylight was blinding.

A headache dully crammed her skull.

Her teeth clenched in anger as she tossed the sheets away from her body and fell to the floor.

This single dream, this single image, was something that she couldn't shake. A nightmare that came to her every month, each time it felt more real than the next.

When the headache had passed she reached for the end table, steading herself to her feet with a trembling breath.

Finnick's side of the bed was empty. It hadn't been slept in for some time.

Her eyes narrowed in confusion as she approached the window. At first she thought that was the sun was rising, but as she came face to face with the glass she realize she was wrong. The sun wasn't rising, it was setting.

Her hand pressed against her head as she stumbled back. She had slept through the whole day.

In panic she ran to the bathroom and started the shower.

By the time she was dressed and made up it was completely dark outside. Her breathes unevenly quivered as she made her way down the white walkway. Chants and screams were shattering the night. Fireworks filled the sky. A cool sweat covered her brow as she struggled to meet the time of the Open Ceremonies. It wouldn't be long before they started.

She shook her head in frustration. She had never slept through an entire day, something was wrong…she knew something was wrong. Her hands nervously tapped against her thighs as she rounded the corner towards the mouth of the building, pushing past a small portion of the crowd to do so.

She was almost to the doors when she felt someone tugging on her coat. It was someone from the crowd.

"Pandora Sullivan!" they started screaming, "I love you! I love you!"

Her eyes widened. Normally she would have felt annoyance, maybe fear, but not now…something else broke through. Anger. Anger like she had never felt.

He was pulling on her coat so much that she was starting to move forward.

"Let go of me," she growled.

But he didn't hear her over the roar of the crowd.

She furrowed her brow and struggled to get free, but her feet were moving backward. She was too small to pull away. With fright and nervous tension she whirled around and grabbed the man by his coat.

A gasp stopped every muscle in her body.

Suddenly his face turned into Scorch's. His mouth was foaming.

A deafening scream bellowed from her. Before she could stop herself she balled her fist and left hooked him as hard as she could across the jaw. Blood spewed from his mouth.

"There is a fight! I repeat, a fight. Back up, now!" A guard was shouting into his walkie.

Her eyes darted around as she stumbled back and fell to the ground.

"Alright you," the guard angrily grumbled.

He grabbed Pandora by the wrist and pulled her up. His eyes widened when he saw her face.

"Miss Sullivan?"

Her head was spinning. She blinked her eyes a few times, trying to slow her heartbeat.

"I—" her eyes twitched to the front doors, a group of soldiers were spilling out. The first face she was Adric.

"Pandora?!"

Her knees buckled just as he reached her.

"Woah!" he quickly grabbed her shoulders and helped her catch her balance.

"What is going on?"

She was speechless, her lips parted but no words came out.

Adric peered behind her, his eyes landed on the man she had just punched. Sudden urgency filled him, "Did he attack you?"

She gasped for air. Slowly her head nodded, "He wouldn't let go of me."

Adric furrowed his brow, "Alright—I got you, don't worry."

She frowned as he helped her to the doors.

"You can take care of this?" He asked one of the soldiers who had a large scar on his face.

"Don't worry, we can take care of the crowd."

He gave the soldier a firm nod. His eyes lowered as they crossed the large foyer. A few audience members that hadn't taken their seats yet stared at them and whispered.

"Pandora," he shook her slightly, "You have to be normal. Just relax."

Her gaze fearfully twitched around, her eyes were burning, "I need to sit."

"Do you want me to get Viktor?"

She inhaled slowly, lowering her body onto one of the benches, "No…I'm fine."

He grabbed her chin and tilted her face up, "You look sick."

Her eyes fluttered for a minute, "Please, don't get Viktor. I'm fine."

Adric stared at her doubtfully. After a few seconds passed he peered around, "What happened out there?"

"I was—I was late—I was in a rush and that man wouldn't let go of me."

"So you punched him?!"

She clasped her hand to her chest, "He wouldn't let go!"

Her shout echoed through the cavernous foyer, causing Adric to straighten his back. That wasn't the truth at all. The truth was that she had a flashback to the arena, but she didn't want to admit that. If she admitted that aloud she could never take it back, never be as strong as she was before.

"Look, just calm down," he whispered, taking a seat next to her, "Are you tired?"

"No…I don't need sleep."

"Maybe you should go home."

"I have to support Finnick."

Adric scanned her face, "Do you want me to get him?"

She was beginning to catch her breath again. Her vision was becoming clearer, her voice more steady.

"No. Don't bother him with this. It's nothing."

"Alright."

Music suddenly started to blare. The Opening Ceremonies were beginning.

"The chariots!" Pandora exclaimed, "We should get inside."

"Hey—woah woah—" he grabbed her arm to stopped her, "Maybe you should just sit for a minute, hmm? I could get you water."

She pursed her lips and slowly moved away from him, "I'm not thirsty."

Before he could say another word she climbed to her feet and started walking. Adric silently followed her. His eyes were glued to the back of her head as they ascended the steps to the seating.

An ovular ring was surrounded by thousands of seats. Most were filled, however there were still a few that were empty. Near the end of the large track, sitting in a marble faced balcony, President Snow was awaiting the procession of Tributes.

The Panem Anthem sounded and the lights dimmed just as Pandora found her seat. The music made her feel nauseous, reminded her of the nightmare that had sent her into a strange spiral.

Iron doors slowly opened at the edge of the track. A few onlookers were throwing flowers already.

Adric worriedly glanced to Pandora's flushed face before settling down next to her.

"I thought you were on duty?" She whispered just as the Tributes from District 1 came soaring onto the track.

"I'm not going to leave you."

"I don't need to be looked after."

Music echoed through the stadium proudly.

"Yea, well—I need it."

Her terrible dream scratched through the fogginess. She solemnly rubbed her lips together and turned away.

Screens hung throughout the stadium, showing close ups of each Tribute.

Her eyes lowered to the iron doors just as District 4's chariot emerged. Pandora tried to concentrate on the chariot but it was hard for her to focus. Her head leaned back, her chest rose up and down slowly.

"I had a terrible nightmare," she whispered to Adric, not fully knowing why she had.

His dark eyes peered at her but the rest of him remained straight and soldierly, "What?"

"It was just a nightmare, but it—it was terrible. It keeps happening to me."

"Pandora…are you sure you're okay?"

She glanced to him, holding her gaze on his eyes for a long second, "Please don't ever ask me that again."

He studied her grimace and tired eyes. Pandora's fair skin had gone so pale that the dark circles underneath her eyes looked lavender, even her pink lips looked white. Of course she wasn't okay, but Adric had no idea why. Despite his worry he tried to get a hold of himself.

"You got it," he finally whispered back, trying to seem reserved.

The President was giving his speech, but it was all white noise. Holding composure was something Pandora excelled at, but for some reason she couldn't seem to fully steady herself. She leaned away from Adric, staring vacantly around the audience. Whatever had happened to her with that nightmare made her feel unhinged, and it was happening very fast.

Slowly she lifted her hand to her head and rubbed her temple. Her throat suddenly felt cracked and dry.

When Snow finally finished Pandora crept to her feet. Adric stared at her in surprise.

"Where are you going?"

A few people turned to look.

"Don't follow me," she harshly whispered back.

Her feet were moving faster than her brain. She needed to see Finnick, that would make her feel better. Her hand pressed against the wall as she started to descend the steps.

Footsteps were following her.

"Pandora…"

Adric was right behind her.

At the back of her skull a headache started to hum.

He reached out for her shoulder. She was still on the stairs when she turned around.

"What is going on?!" he exclaimed.

Instantly she yelped in horror. Although it had to be Adric, her mind was playing tricks on her. Marius's face was staring back at Pandora.

"No…" she groaned angrily, pulling away from him in terror.

"What's the matter?"

"You're not Marius!"

"What?!"

Suddenly the dull headache heightened. She let out a whimper and lifted her hands to her head.

"Ahh!"

Her feet fell out from under her.

Adric tried to grab Pandora but she was falling too fast. Her body rolled down the steps, pain splintered throughout her body until she collapsed at the bottom.

"Pandora!"

Her vision was hazy as she felt Adric turn her over. He lifted her head up and apprehensively scanned her pallid face.

He wasn't Marius anymore. He was Adric. A pained sob murmured from her as she gasped for air.

Dark spots started to form in her visions. He was shouting something to her but she couldn't make out what he was saying. Just before she fainted she heard the shuffle of feet heading towards them.

Beep.

Beep.

Her eyes squinted open.

Beep.

At first his face was only a silhouette. His blond hair seemed to glow against the bright lights overhead.

"Viktor!"

She flexed her fingers, grimacing as she felt the fatigue in her limbs and head. Her mouth was as dry as a desert, muddled blotches confused her eyes. Seconds past before her vision fully cleared.

"Where am I?" She groggily asked, dully turning her head from left to right.

Suddenly someone else came into view.

Mironov gently tilted her chin up. His light eyes narrowed in scrutiny, "Pandora? Can you hear me?"

She blinked her eyes. His voice was muffled for an instant.

"Pandora?"

"Yes, why am I—am I in the infirmary?"

Mironov helped Pandora sit up, he nodded as he readjusted her pillows and IVs, "You fainted, Adric took you here."

Slowly the memories of the past few hours came flooding back. The headache, the flashbacks she was having...all of it.

Adric was pacing near the doorway. His eyes darted to her as he moved from left to right.

"Adric said you were hallucinating?"

"No!" She clawed at the sheets nervously, "I just was confused. I was tired."

Mironov glanced over his shoulder, he was trying to hide the worry in his eyes, "Pandora, I think you were having flashbacks—"

"But—"

"Now," he quickly interrupted, "If you were, that would be normal. You aren't insane, you're brain is simply trying to cope with past trauma, you understand?"

She lowered her eyes shamefully.

"I know I'm not insane, Viktor," she snarled under her breath, "I don't need you to tell me that."

Mironov straightened his back and took of his glasses. He stared at her silently before he turned around, "Adric could you give us a minute."

Adric stopped pacing, he twitched his eyes from Pandora to Mironov. It was obvious he wanted to object but instead he nodded in compliance.

Mironov didn't turn back to her till the door was completely shut, "He's becoming quite the watchdog, isn't he?"

Pandora rubbed her lips together and peered away, "He thinks it's his job."

This made Mironov smile.

"Why don't you tell me what happened today?"

Her lips parted. She looked at the IV in her arm and shrugged sorrowfully, "Everything was good last night, I was happy. Then I had this…" she shivered at the dream, "…this terrible nightmare. When I woke up it was evening. I slept through the entire day, I've never done that. I felt sick, it felt like something was off. When I got to the Opening Ceremonies a fan grabbed me. One minute he was just another face, but then it changed. I saw Scorch…"

"Adric said that just before you fell down the steps you called him Marius."

Her hand lifted to her brow, "For a minute, I thought…I thought I saw Marius."

Tears were starting to well up in her eyes, quietly Mironov moved his hand to hers and gave it a gentle pat.

"Is that why you were screaming?"

"Yes, and—" her voice cut out, she couldn't look at him, "—I had another headache, if you could call it that. It felt more like someone had taken a knife to my brain."

"And that's why you collapsed?"

"Yes."

His hand moved away from hers. He quickly looked away and rubbed his beard. For some reason he wouldn't look her straight in the face. His lips were curled his entire face into a strange expression.

"Viktor…"

"Hm?"

Her voice lowered to a whisper, "Adric told me what you did, so that I could see my family."

Although Mironov didn't look at her his head perked up, "I hardly did a thing, Pandora."

"But it means a lot to me. It means more than anything."

All she could see was his profile. He smirked sadly.

"Well if I was able to see my family again, I know I would hope someone would do the same for me."

"Thank you."

Pandora thought that her offer of thanks would have had more of an affect on Mironov, but it didn't. Without looking at her he simply nodded, placing his glasses back onto the bridge of his nose as he stood up and sighed.

"I took a blood sample and some scans of your brain and spine, just so you know."

"What were my results?"

He stared at his shoes, "There was nothing. You're completely healthy."

"But I know something's wrong. I can feel it."

His eyes lifted to her face instantly. He was nipping at his lip when he lowered the chart to her gurney and smiled.

"Pandora I would know if something was wrong. This is what I do. You are simply overworked, you need rest."

"Where is she?!"

The voice made her attention shift to the door.

"Just hold on one second, you can't just go in there!"

Pandora's eyes widened as the door flew open. Finnick pressed his hand against the frame. His cheeks were flushed and his hair was tousled from running.

"What happened?!"

He cupped Pandora's face in his hands and stared.

"Are you okay?!"

She swallowed hard, reminding herself to play it off. A tired smile lifted her lips slightly, "I'm fine, Finnick…I'm fine. I just—I fell down a few stairs."

Finnick urgently glanced to Mironov, "Is that true?"

Mironov clicked his jaw in thought and he slowly nodded.

"You have nothing to worry about. She's strong. Not even a sprain on her. She just needs some bed rest. I recommend a lot of relaxation."

Mironov lowered his eyes to her face and tried his best to smile.

"Pandora, you're free to go whenever you want."

Just before leaving he tapped Pandora on the shoulder and turned around. His feet echoed into the corridor as he shut the door behind him and glanced at Adric. The helium lights buzzed quietly. He had only taken a few steps when he heard Adric's military boots following him.

"What's going on with her, Viktor?"

"I don't know what you mean."

They turned a corner together.

"That was not normal earlier. She was having a mental breakdown."

"Well, that's what happens when you repress things, they come out in strange and catatonic ways."

A few doctors gave Mironov a nod as they past.

"She was screaming. She kept talking about a nightmare. Did you ask her about that even?!"

"Lower your voice, Mr. Pedersen."

Adric's nostrils flared, "Don't you talk to me that way. Did you ask her?"

Mironov suddenly stopped, he turned so that he was face to face with Adric.

"I didn't see the point."

"What do you mean?"

"Pandora Sullivan has been through a lot…"

"You don't think I know that?!"

"I think you know it. I don't think you understand it. She has survived the arena. In order to do that she had to make decision that cost people lives. So no, I am not surprised that she has nightmares still. I don't ask, Adric, because if she wanted to tell me she would tell me."

Adric pursed his lips and leaned back.

"You're lying to me, you know something and you're not telling me."

"Since when do I answer to you? Adric, I've known you since you were a baby. I'm asking you to trust me, leave this be."

Adric angrily glared back at him. His dark eyes were burning with fear and rage. He let out a scoff and shook his head, "I hope you know what you're doing, Viktor…because if you don't and she gets hurt…someone is going to answer for it."

"You care about her too much, Adric."

"Yea? And what about you? You realize that just because she looks like Atty doesn't mean she is, right?"

"Don't bring up my daughter, not now."

Adric blinked his eyes away. He hardened his face and started stepping back, "Goodbye, Viktor."

"Wait—"

Before Mironov could stop Adric, he was gone.

He stared at the officer's shadow until it turned the corner.

The old doctor pulled on his lab coat in frustration. He stood there for several minutes, his eyes felt heavy and his bad knee ached.

When he started walking once more he released a heavy sigh and shook his head. Over and over again he saw Pandora's face, over and over he felt guilt.

The lab results were resting on his desk by the time he got back. He glanced down the hall for a heartbeat, before clearing his throat and closing the blinds.

It was dark in his office. He only bothered to light a single candle before taking a seat. Silently he rocked his chair, his eyes were glued to the folder.

"Rather archaic isn't it?"

The voice simmered from the darkness. Instantly Mironov sat up and widened his eyes.

Footsteps sounded.

As President Snow emerged from the shadows he adjusted the white rose on his lapel.

"The candle, I mean."

Mironov side-glanced the flame.

"It feels good on my eyes."

"Seems strange that someone like you would use that. With all your experiments and inventions I would have thought you'd create your own light emitting technology."

Mironov lowered his eyes. "I was going to meet you tomorrow."

Snow smiled sinisterly, "Well, Viktor, I just couldn't wait. Those are the result I suspect?"

His hand moved to the folder, "Yes."

"And how is our candidate?"

"I don't feel comfortable with this."

"Viktor—" Snow condescendingly cooed as he took a seat across from the doctor, "Viktor, Viktor, Viktor…this isn't a bad thing. What you're doing is miracle. It's science."

"It's just that she had an episode earlier this evening."

"You said that was to be expected."

Mironov tried to cloak his concern, "I wasn't expecting it to happen this fast or badly. I've been giving her the doses every month, slowly introducing it into her system in preparation. Mr. President, I don't know if her brain can take what this procedure will entail. There are so many other things going on inside her, it seems the memories of the arena are interfering with a smooth transition. I know I told you that her irregular chromosome count and blood results are the only compatible types I have found, but maybe there's another way. I'm just afraid—what I mean is—I'm concerned that there's a chance she will never be the same afterward."

Snow's snake eyes sparkled. He rubbed his temple and smiled through the shadows. His whisper seemed to hiss.

"So?"