"How are you doing?" My Dad asked as he leant across my door frame of my room.
I was sitting with my legs crossed in the middle of the floor as I still hadn't decorated or even thought about adding furniture into the open space. I looked up from the canvas that I was in front of me to see that I had created yet another picture of Seth. I sighed while standing up and carried the painting into my wardrobe where I kept the others of the boy with the bog brown eyes that I had drawn over the past month.
That's right, we had now been living in London for a month. I had not seen my soul mate for two months and three days; my heart ached.
"I'm good," I smiled at Jasper as I realised that I hadn't answered his question.
"Esme said that if you don't want to decorate the room then she would be delighted to." He offered as he walked around the perimeter of my bedroom gracefully. He stopped at my porch doors that led to the balcony and looked out at the beautiful view.
"No I want to its just... I don't know." I grumbled while entwining my fingers together for something to do. I was bored a lot lately. I had finished the artwork that Esme wanted and even hung them up on the walls. I had also done extra by creating small clay sculptures that were dotted around the house.
"You can tell me anything you know, I know I'm not exactly the perfect Dad figure like Edward and even Carlisle but I will always be here for you." He rested his hands on my shoulder as we both sat down in my original spot on the floor.
"Thank you, and your not to bad. Though to be honest I see you more like an uncle. I've never had a dad before and it is still really weird to think of you as one. Your protective and set boundaries which I am so grateful for as it gives me some normality like everyone else but I don't think I will ever be able to think of you as one, if that makes sense. I still call you one but I don't know, it's so messed up sometimes." I mumbled while staring at the wooden floor.
"No, I think I understand what you mean. I still freak out sometimes each time I think that I have a daughter, I'm glad that I have you but most of the time I haven't got a clue what to do." He told me with a sheepish laugh.
"Well your doing great with what you are doing." I praised him with a smile.
"How come you haven't decorated this room yet?" Jasper asked while gesturing to the walls with outstretched arms.
"I don't know... I just..." I sighed and closed my eyes "it feels like if I decorate it it's the end of me and Seth." I owned up to my dad and to myself.
I hadn't thought about the reason why I had a hatred of adding colour to the walls but now it made so much sense.
"This is my blank canvas, my new start if I add colour it will be completed, my new start would be my future, without Seth." I laid my back down on the cool wooden floor and stared at the ceiling. "It sounds so stupid now that I've said it out loud as its just a room but..."
"You can't stop feeling like that." My dad finished for me while taking my hand and giving it a squeeze.
I gulped back my tears. "Can we talk about something else?" I asked quietly.
There was a long pause of silence until he finally spoke. "Carlisle wants a family meeting when he gets back from the hospital, about who wants to go to school and what year everyone wants to be in."
"Okay. I'm not goig to be able to ride my bike am I?" I shot up as I realised this.
"I'm sorry but no. You can still ride it out of town but we try to act as young as possible when we start out so we can stay longer and you can definitely get away with looking 15 like Renesmee. Everyone else would either be 16 or 17." He explained.
"It's gonna be strange going to a British school, the whole system is different and we have to wear uniform." I stool my nose up at the thought.
My dad laughed at me "it'll be fine, just keep your head down and don't cause a crowd,"
"Like that would be possible, we're frigging vampires for goodness sake plus a wolf." My throat closed as I remembered seeing Seth in his other self. Did he still wear my necklace? It was confusing but when he was wolf I felt closer to him somehow, like our imprint was unbreakable. I chuckled to myself. Yep- real unbreakable we lived on the other side of the country for goodness sake!
"Jasper!" I heard Alice call from downstairs.
"I'll speak to you later Ella," Jasper stood up, patted me on the back ad shoot off at vampire speed before I could say goodbye.
I shook my head in frustration, seth could never leave my mind no matter how hard i tried! It had been just over two months, wasn't time meant to heal wounds?
That is what is was with Seth; a wound. Like something had been ripped out with force and hadn't been stitched back up. I was still open and bleeding.
I needed a distraction again. I thought painting would be that distraction but each time I worked Seth would always appear in front of me. I had created 297 prices of Seth. That was just sad. They were each different yet they still had the same meaning: loneliness. I was lonely without him even though I had so many great people around me.
I eased myself up off the floor and headed out of the door. I sniffed the air automatically to pick up Renesmees scent; she was outside with Jacob.
I couldn't go to her when she was with her imprint. It reminded me to much of what I could of had. The wolf with an inbreed. I shook my head of the thought and decided to go hunting; there was nothing better to do at the minute.
I gracefully ran through the forest with ease. The sun peeped through the clouds in the early September air and it made my skin glisten like stars. I traced my index finger over my arm as I admired the beauty as I carried on running. I was grateful that only the supernatural with great eyesight could see the difference between me and a human when sunny, it meant i didn't have to be cooped up indoors half the time.
My path changed as I caught the sound of hooves lightly crunching grass and leaves. I ended up at the edge of a clearing, it was full of emerald grass that stood out wildly. Five small deer had their heads down as they ate, oblivious to my presence. My throat burned as I saw a larger one come into the meadow.
He was mine...
I crouched down subconsciously and grazed my teeth with my tongue. I could taste the venom leaving a salty trail over my taste buds as it filled my mouth. I took one step forward.
Two steps forward...
Three...
"Ahhhh," made me snap out of my hunt as a large figure came barrelling through a gap in the tress at the other end of the meadow that I was crouched down in.
I hissed as the deer fled while he was chasing them through the English woodland with his arms up in the air.
"Emmett! They were mine!" I stomped my foot on the ground as he reappeared in front of me.
He replied with a chuckle and tapped me on the head. "Sorry little neice but Carlisle sent me out to come find you."
I stuck my tongue out at him immaturely, I could still taste the salty taste of venom on my tongue ad the burn in my throat raged on. "I need to drink before I go back." I admitted sheepishly.
It was still weird to discuss my feeding habits to the Cullen's. It was always my private thing that no one knew about.
"Okay, but I'm staying with you." He shrugged his shoulders. I had kicked everyone in the butt (not literally) when they asked constantly to go hunting with me. They don't want to leave me alone with my emotions after Seth but I forced them with my powers to let me go with no hassle. I didn't want anyone to see me hunt and everyone knew about it.
"No!" I screamed at Emmett and he rolled his eyes.
"Your keeping everyone waiting so go hunt." He pushed me in the back before sitting down on the ground with crossed legs. "I'll wait just here."
I eyed him suspiciously, I hated the fact that he could follow me but I hate more that I was keeping the Cullen's waiting.
I sighed and head back through the woods to find my previous deer.
"Finally!" Renesmee cheered as I followed Emmett into the light dinning room. I took a seat next to my dad and he smiled at me.
"Have a good hunt?" He asked while the corners of his lips tugged up.
"Kind of..." I shifted uncomfortably. I needed to be more open about my vampire side. "I caught two deer, I'm starting to miss the mountain lions and bears to be honest. The England woodland has a lot less variety." I grumbled as I thought of it.
"Tell me about it, though I did sample a squirrel last night, they may be small but they actually taste real good." Emmett commented out of the blue. Everyone stared at him in shock but it soon turned to laughter around the table.
"Okay, guys." Carlisle called from the top end of the table to quieten everyone down. It took another couple of seconds before the bubbles of laughter completely stopped. "I went to enrol you all into school today as the school just started again after the summer holidays." He paused dramatically, I rolled my eyes.
"We know this already old man," I sarcastically responded.
He smiled at me "Renesmee and Ella you'll both be 14, in year 10. Edward, Bella, Jacob and Alice you'll be 15, in year 11 and Rose, Jasper and Emmett you'll be 16, in your first year of sixth form which is connected to the school." He looked around at all of us in turn a he spoke to make sure everyone was okay with the ages. "Right, we now need to short out a story."
"Are we keeping it the same?" Rosalie questioned while twirling her blonde hair around her right fingers.
"Yes, I think so. Rose and Jasper will be twins and Ella will be their younger sister, your last name will be Whitlock. Alice and Bella will be cousins and both be Esme's nieces, your last name will be Swan. Edward and Renesmee will be siblings, your last name will be Cullen. Emmett and Jacob you wont be related to anyone in the family as you don't exactly look like anyone you will be Cullens, i will let you guys decide what happened to you and how you camr into our 'care'. Me and Esme will both be your foster carers. I remind all of you to tell us as soon as you change a story or reveal something about your background." He remind serious throughout his speech to make sure we all understood and knew.
Everyone nodded "when does school start?" Renesmee asked excitedly.
"Tomorrow," Esme piped in while offering a smile to Renesmee.
Everyone groaned except Renesmee.
"I don't get why you guy don't like school. You get to learn new things and speak to new people." Renesmee excitedly clapped her hands together as she thought of the 'great' experiences she was going to have tomorrow.
I scoffed "keep thinking that Ness." I nudge her shoulder with my arm as she sat on my left where my Dad sat on my right.
"It's my first time at school, I'm allowed to be excited!' She cheered a bit to loudly.
"Just don't get your hopes up to high, I used to think exactly the same before I left..." I somehow chocked at the thought of my Mum, I hadn't done that in forever. I had always thanked God that I could have left her, that I found a way out. She wasn't always horrible, i remember mainly the bad times but now I couldn't stop thinking of the okay times. She changed drastically for a reason that I had come to know as money. I remember the times we used to take picnics with other family's around the town that we live in. She changed just like I have.
I smiled at the thought of my change, I now felt a better person, it may have taken me a while to short my life out but now I saw everything around me as perfect.
"Before I left my mother," I finished off the sentence as everyone was waiting for me. I stood up with a smile and waved goodbye to everyone before I headed upstairs. I wanted to paint, but not on a canvas I wanted to paint on a wall.
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