RECAP OF CHAPTER 4:

I shook my head, as I felt the water grow way too hot for comfort and practically yelped as I jumped out of the shower. What was I doing thinking about those kind of things? It wasn't even worth a second thought. An accident that was. Accident. I reminded myself. I quickly curled my hair up in a towel and wrapped another one around my body. I silently spurned Edward Cullen for appearing in my thoughts once again. Was there ever an escape from this fool? I shook my head annoyed as I paced back into my room searching for clothes. Today was going to be a good day. I was not going to let him ruin it. Not at all.

Bella POV

Lunch out with the boys only proved to be exactly how I imagined it. Alice, Rosalie, and I sitting there barely picking at our food as Emmett, Jasper, and Christopher completely devoured plate, after plate of food. Gross. And even had to ill mannered mindsets to talk in between bites with mouths full of food. Typical. I almost barfed when I saw Emmett shoving an almost complete hotdog down this throat. But Rosalie had apparently had enough of the bad table manners too.

"Emmett!" She screeched at him. "You are being so embarrassing right now, that is so disgusting." she said swatting the beef frank from his hands and back onto his plate. Served him right. The other two boys seemed to follow suit, not wanting to incur the wrath of Rosalie.

I was about to say something to insult them further when my phone buzzed. I unlocked it and peered down at the messaged.

I'm off in a couple hours, just got on break for a little bit. See you soon?

-Dimitri

I smiled like a little school girl down at the message and typed back fast.

Good to know you're still alive, and yes, we'll have to make plans!

-B

I left it at that and put my phone away, still smiling like a fool.

"Ohh, la, la, looks like Bella got a text from lover boy!" Alice crooned looking over in my direction her eyebrows moving up and down suggestively.

"Oh, shut it Alice, he's not really a lover boy, more like, a cuddle boy, nothing happened!" I said my face turning red. It was true, nothing had happened between me and Dimitri, that's what made it so impossibly sweet. He was a good man, he didn't want to take advantage of me, not like Edward had. Even with the alcohol, that was still no excuse for him to have done with he did. He knew that I'd never done that before, and still he… I shook me head pulling my thoughts from him. Darn him again for entering them.

I'm almost 23 and I had the right to do as I pleased. I could bring a million guys home and sleep with them if I wanted to, but that's not what I wanted, I just wanted a sweet genuine guy, and I wanted that guy and me to have a sweet and genuine love for my first encounter with the bittersweet experience of making love for the first time. But damn is that whiskey a strong and evil mistress. And this time I was going to make certain that this guy was genuine and passionate and that we loved each other before doing the nasty, which meant definitely limiting my alcohol intake. Hell, he could have taken advantage of me last night if he had wanted to, but he didn't. That's one check mark in the good box for him so far.

I'm not saying I'm ready to marry the kid, or even put a boyfriend status on him, I'm just saying he's a good cuddle buddy, and he knows what boundaries are, and he treated me like a perfect gentleman should. That's all.

I pulled myself out of my thoughts just in time to see the rest of the gang getting up to pay the cashier for our meals, the men all splitting the bill. Good, since they practically ate enough for a small country.

The ride home was a blur I just couldn't seem to keep myself out of my own thoughts of the night before. Dimitri was just so perfect, almost too perfect, but who was I to kick a good thing in the ass? I smiled at myself and rested my head against the window of Emmett's jeep. When we pulled back into our driveway Emmett and Rosalie said their goodbyes and went back to their place. This is the situation that I hated the most.

Alice all over Christopher in the living room watching a movie, and me and Jasper, the third and fourth wheels. It was extremely awkward. Obviously we didn't have any remaining feelings, we were friends now, but at times like this it really sucked to not have someone. I looked over at Jasper who was already looking at me, clearly thinking the same thing, but he just shrugged and climbed the stairs to his room. I sighed and checked my phone, no messages. Oh well.

I ran upstairs really quick, pulled off my jeans and sweater I had hastily thrown on this morning, and traded them for a pair of jean shorts, a white tank top, and an off the shoulder, hot pink see through baggy shirt. I pulled my hair up into a pony tail and assessed myself, finally giving a shrug. It was as good as I was going to get right this moment. I bolted back downstairs, slipping on my pink and purple Osiris sneakers and muttered a goodbye to Alice and Christopher who were still making out on the couch, they didn't even notice me.

I made my way down the stone walkway that led down to the roadside curb in front of my house. I looked over at my black convertible bug, and decided to walk instead. Where I was going I had no idea I just needed to get out of the house, I had so much to think about, and no one to talk to. My best friend currently occupied with her man candy. I sighed again and stuck my hands into my pockets and looked up at the sky. I had no idea how I had got here in life. Or how I had ended up hating my best friend. Edward. If I didn't hate him so much I would be calling him right now to hang out, or at least spill my guts to. Our relationship, scratch that, our friendship was ruined. I couldn't talk to him about anything, let alone boy issues. He was one.

I couldn't call him up and be like "Oh hey Edward, by the way, I'm so confused right now, seems like this Dimitri guy is like perfect, but I haven't quite gotten over the fact that I was one of your many one night stands, and now I hate you, what should I do about that?" ha! Like I could do that.

I tried so hard to make sure I didn't become one of the statistics when it came to Edward Cullen. There were so many of them, blondes, brunettes, red heads, girls with hair colors that definitely were not natural. So many. Admittedly back in high school I had the biggest crush on Edward Anthony Mason Cullen. It was enough for me to just be near him, even if it meant watching him with girl after girl after girl. It was just how he was since I could remember. Never fully satisfied and on to the next one. Everything was okay once I fell for Jasper, things got easier and then I could meet Edwards eyes without feel awkward and felt normal.

And everything was okay, for the next couple years we were as close as two friends could be. We told each other everything, and our group was always together, inseparable. We played together. Laughed together. Learned together. Cried together, and of course clubbed together. Which is what ended mine and Edwards friendship altogether.

It was useless to talk about what had transpired between us too. I looked back at it in regret and he looked back on it as just another one of the girls he took to bed I'm sure. I hated him for it. He never once contradicted it, and once he started to use the cocky attitude on me like he did with every other girl he had taken to bed, I knew it was true. It made my stomach turn over just thinking about it.

I sighed and looked around. I had ended up just inside of town while I was thinking. I looked up and down the street, trying to locate something to do to occupy my time. My feet carried me towards the only place I would go to if I was in doubt. The local bookstore, Bookends. It was the greatest bookstore I had ever seen, mostly because of their extensive selection, they had everything.

I leafed through book after book, not really finding anything of interest. Feeling defeated I went to my usual place, and plucked Wuthering Heights off the shelf and sunk into one of the many reclining chairs that the store provided for their browsers. I absentmindedly flipped to chapter seven only to see the text portray an angry Heathcliff when he finds Cathy to have switched roles and is not longer the rough tomboy he knew, but a dignified lady.

I almost laugh at myself. Heathcliff is such a beautiful monster, and Cathy reminded me a lot of myself in ways. I read this book so many times but never bought it. This was my one place to escape. Which is why I almost cursed the heavens themselves when I saw a familiar head of bronze hair just above the shelf in front of me. Just great. I groaned internally. No way he wasn't going to see me, no point in trying to avoid it.

"Must you always ruin my day." I sigh just as he rounds the corner and his eyes fall on me, surprised, confused, and another emotion I couldn't quite place.

Edwards POV

My heart almost stopped when I heard her voice coming from the other side of the bookcase. We often came here when we were hanging out, just sitting and reading in silent, maybe making a couple remarks. I don't know why I had expected anything to be like back then, and as I rounded the corner I knew it wouldn't be.

Her lips were pressed into a thin annoyed line, and her long brown was pulled back into a loose pony tail, typical. Her large brown doe eyes fell on me, and they held their usual distain that they seemed to hold towards me these days.

"Guns down!" I scoffed as I leaned against the bookshelf looking down at her, and she just rolled her eyes and turned the page in her book as she crossed her legs. My eyes wondered, she had on a pair of tight blue jean shorts, and an off the shoulder shirt, showing quite a bit of skin. Horribly beautiful.

I stood in silence for a moment, I had never noticed how essential she was to my life and happiness until she was gone. I made the worst mistake of my life. I was about to open my mouth to say something when her phone went off, playing some ringtone with a man singing about being kids in love, and making mistakes in the summer and almost laughed. Her call was brief and she stood up, and headed for the door, but I caught her arm.

"Where are you running off to/" I asked her, maybe a little for forcibly. And her reply cut into me like a knife.

"I'm going to meet Dimitri, not that it's any of your business." she hissed, as she walked out with a huge smile plastered on her face. Damn.

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