A/N: This one's a little longer than usual. I tend to worry that I'm losing the tone that I'd set previously in the story. I'd appreciate it if you told me what you think, or maybe even gave a few suggestions. Feedback is always helpful.

CH 19

Mindy stepped through the door into the crowded apartment. Rishi had been overly generous when describing it as a house party. The place was a studio apartment, admittedly nicer than she'd expected, but not a house. Dimly lit, there was a cloud of smoke hanging over everyone's head. She wrinkled her nose. The sweet yet pungent aroma of something nefarious assaulted her. "Danny, you're definitely the oldest person here." She raised her voice slightly so she would be heard over the music being played at a moderate volume.

She felt his hand on her lower back, easing her further into the room. The entire time they'd walked along the street to their destination he'd stayed close at her back, his hand occasionally resting in that same place. He leaned into her ear. "You come in a close second place."

He smiled when she whipped her head around to give him a sour look. "I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that." She cast searching glances about the room. "Where did he go?" Rishi and Javi had outpaced them, disappearing into the building before Mindy and Danny had even reached it. "I mean really, it doesn't even look like there are other rooms in this place. Where is he?"

The slight note of anxiety tinging her inflection softened Danny. He did a quick scan of the place. There were no overhead lights, but rather randomly placed wall sconces casting a low wattage bluish glow over everything. There were a lot of people milling around and draped over the white couches in the middle of the apartment. Everyone had drinks in their hands, and there were more than a few glowing orange cherries floating in the dimness.

"Over there, in that group of guys standing by the island, in what I guess you could call the kitchen." He placed his hand on her shoulder and angled her in the direction he was pointing. The little group formed an attentive half circle around one person. "That must be that guy, little-whatever-his-name-is."

She could see her brother's mouth moving. Rishi's head bobbed evenly to some beat she couldn't hear. Lil' Killa closed his eyes and moved his own head along with Rishi's. Slipping from Danny's grasp, she nodded and took a couple purposeful steps forward. He quickly followed, laying a hand on her arm. Stayed by the movement, she looked up at him curiously. "What?"

He hesitated, pursing his lips slightly. He began slowly. "Well, you kind of promised to hang back while we're here." She opened her mouth to dispute the fact, but he cut her off. "And he's in clear view, it's not like they're going to drag him off and murder him for saying west coast rap is better than east coast rap or something." He squeezed her arm where his hand was still resting. "You need to let him feel this out."

She sighed, turning back to look at her brother. "I was kind of hoping I could sabotage this night and change his mind about the whole rap thing." There was guilt in her words. "This is all so…. Well, I don't even have words for it. He has so many opportunities, and this is what he chooses. Rap? We grew up in Concord, Massachusetts. What does he have to rap about?" She stepped back from Danny, throwing her arms out in the Mindy version of a rap-stance. "Yo! The winter is wicked cold! My mom bought me a sweater I didn't like, word!"

Her attempt to be lighthearted for a moment fell flat. She dropped her arms and her shoulders drooped. "I'm not uptight, I like rap. I can even ignore the fact that there is some obvious drug use going on here," She waved her hand in front of her face, cutting through the haze. "But I can't help wanting something more certain for him." The words flew from her mouth, picking up speed as she went along. "What if he gets some sort of encouragement tonight and wants to drop out of school again? I mean, look at that guy." She gestured to Lil' Killa. "Oh God, he looks like he likes it."

She felt her throat closing up again and swallowed hard. "This isn't how it's supposed to be." She bent over at the waist, placing her hands on her knees, taking a few deep breaths. She tipped her head up and looked at Danny. "This is what he does to me. He wouldn't be here in New York if it weren't for me living here. I feel responsible for him." She dropped her head back down and gagged. "I can't even take care of myself sometimes. The only food I have in my apartment is wine and Cheetos."

A few of the girls on sitting on one of the sofas began to peer at Mindy in concern. Danny stepped closer to her and laid his hand on her back, moving it in gentle circles. He leaned down close to her ear. "Mindy, people are starting to stare. You wanna step outside for air or something?"

She pulled herself upright again and straightened her jacket. She raised a hand to get the girls' attention, speaking more loudly than necessary. "Nothing to see here. Just a drunk twenty two year old girl trying to get this older gentleman to take her home." She looked at Danny then back to the girls. They shot her slightly disinterested yet incredulous looks. "He could be just the sugar daddy I was looking for. He looks like the kind of guy who might even own a blazer with elbow patches."

He frowned, and called out to the girls. "This sober woman is the same age as me and elbow patches are practical." The group had completely lost interest and had returned to sipping their drinks and bobbing their heads along to the beat of the music.

She leaned into him and threaded her arm though his and whispered in his ear. "Yeah, I need to get out of here."

Danny led her down the stairs and back out onto the stoop, shivering slightly in the cold night air. There were a couple people standing on the steps below smoking cigarettes in silence. He urged her down to sit on the top step, taking a place beside her. She leaned forward and put her head between her knees, groaning. "How will I explain this to our parents?"

Danny reached up and placed his hand on the back of her neck, giving her a gentle squeeze. "I don't think my mom will care all that much. She doesn't even know Rishi." His lame joke elicited a little laugh, but she left her head tucked between her knees. He sighed. "Explain what, Min? Nothing's happened yet. I've heard Rishi's rap. He's a talented kid, but there's not a lot of passion behind it, not yet anyway. He's had no real heartache, no real pain. He hasn't lived yet."

She slowly sat upright. Turning her face to his. The street lamp cast a golden light over them, reminding her of the night they went out. Danny looked good in the light of streetlamps, the glow casting his features in sharp contrast. She smiled, not as confidently as usual, but still, it felt nice. "I guess I never really thought about it." She reached up, caught his hand still resting on her neck and pulled it down around her shoulder, leaning into him. "I don't like the idea of him going through things that hurt. He's had it pretty easy."

"I guarantee you, they'll say a few things to each other, Rishi will be encouraged, but it's not like anything will come of it immediately. Do you have any idea how many people approached that guy tonight?" He tucked himself in behind her a bit, enjoying the warmth of their bodies in contrast to the chill of the breeze blowing around them. "You're just overly protective. It's nice actually. I've never seen you care so much about another person."

She laughed. "Wow, Danny, way to a girl's heart. Just call her selfish. That'll work." The usual sting in her words was absent. She made no move to pull herself from his embrace. She let out a long breath. "You're right though. No one else makes me gag from the sheer stress of caring about them." She angled her head so she could see him. "I do feel better now. How is it that you can be so reassuring? The things you usually say only make me doubt myself."

Danny shifted uncomfortably against the cold concrete. For a moment he couldn't find the ability to speak. A wave of guilt washed over him. He looked down at her, the question still written in her eyes. "I never want to make you doubt yourself. You're just so impulsive sometimes. It can be terrifying."

Confusion spread across her features. "Terrifying for whom?" She scooted forward a couple inches so turned to face him head on. He felt his heart pick up its pace when a shrewd smile spread across her face. She reached forward and traced her index finger along the line of his v-neck, brushing by his rapidly thumping pulse. "For you?"

He cleared his throat, hoping to dislodge the tight feeling afflicting it. "Some of those impulses have been advantageous for me, but the majority of them end with you sitting in your pajamas sobbing while eating candy and drowning in red wine." He reached up and stilled the hand at his neck. "And you're an ugly crier." He smiled broadly.

"Rude!" She drew back, ready to shove him back against the wall, but he grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her in close, laying a quick kiss on her lips. She softened against him, laughing into the kiss. Her hand slipped from between them, sliding her fingers up his nape into his hair. The other hand rested on his upper thigh.

The door behind them opened unexpectedly. They jumped apart like two teens caught necking underneath the bleachers. Rishi looked down at them, one eyebrow raised. He leaned on the door frame. "So, I'm ready to go. Javi's headed home with some girl. Lil Killa's about to take off." He jingled the keys in his hand. There was an element of disappointment in his voice.

Danny stood up, reaching down to pull Mindy out of her sitting position. "What's the matter? Lil Whatever not into what you had?" Danny looked at Rishi over Mindy's shoulder. "I've heard that guy's stuff. He throws around a lot of 'hos' and 'mo moneys' but it's all pretty generic stuff. Plus, it's unlikely that someone like him has any say at his label."

Mindy snapped around and shot him a surprised look. "You listen to rap? You know how rap labels work?"

He plastered a pseudo-offended look on his face. "I listen to lots of stuff, ok, and all I'm saying is that guy has no staying power. He's not exactly a wordsmith."

Rishi shrugged. "Yeah, it is kind of hard to argue in defense of someone who regularly calls all the women around him hood-rats." He started down the steps toward the street.

Mindy wrinkled her nose and followed after him. "He does that? Disgusting little twerp." She almost tripped in her haste to get down the steps after Rishi. Close behind her, Danny caught around the waist and steadied her, preventing a nasty stumble. She looked back at him. "Did you see his face? He's so disappointed."

Danny stepped down to the step beside her, hand at her back urging her to continue forward. "Isn't that what you wanted?" The question came out with some reticence. He didn't exactly want to poke at her, but he thought that getting her to articulate what she really wanted for her brother would help her.

They continued down the sidewalk, headed toward the little yellow car. Mindy slowed a bit and looked up at Danny. "Yes, no, I mean… I guess I just want him to be happy." The words were pronounced reluctantly. She stared ahead in contemplation. "This won't be easy for him, and he may never find any success." Her shoulders sagged.

Danny walked along beside her in silence. He stepped closer and captured her swinging hand in his. "Mindy, he's so young. He'll figure it all out." He squeezed her hand and smiled down at her. "He's a smart kid."

The words were what anyone would have said. Normally someone just telling her everything would be okay only made her feel more annoyed, but coming from Danny it was different. He rarely said things he didn't mean. She felt the anxiety lift from her chest.

When they arrived at the car Rishi was already sitting in the driver's seat. Mindy opened the passenger door and slid into the seat beside him, leaving Danny to sit in the back alone.

She reached up and grabbed her seatbelt, fastening it as she spoke to her brother. "You spending the night at my place?" She reached across and laid a hand on his shoulder.

He turned the key in the ignition and the little car came to life. "Yeah, Javi and I are driving down to Concord tomorrow." He pulled the car out onto the street, driving in between the cars lining it.

Mindy bit her lip in nervousness. "You have any news for our parents?" Her voice waivered a bit. "Anything you maybe want to tell me first?" She waited for an answer, holding her breath.

He briefly looked away from the road to shoot her a glance, looking back a Danny for a second before looking back ahead. "Not at this moment. Why? Anything you want to tell me, Mindy?"

She glanced back at Danny. He had an expectant expression on his face, as though he were waiting to hear what she had to say. He stirred uncomfortably when she looked back at him. He leaned back against the seat and shifted his gaze to the window.

She returned her attention to Rishi. "Me? Not at the moment, no." Fed up with the silliness of the conversation, she blew out a breath. "Look, I just want to know what you have decided. In regards to school and stuff."

He sighed and flexed his grip on the steering wheel. "Nothing's changed. I'm still in school. I'll continue to go. Tonight was a bust."

Mindy smiled broadly and unbuckled her seatbelt, scooting across the seat she gave her brother an awkward hug. "Good. I mean, good you decided to continue school, not good that Lil Killa was a tool. I mean, I can't deny I'm kind of glad about that too, but still it's the twenty first century and there's no place for such misogynistic attitudes, you can do better…" She was rambling.

She laid her head on her brother's shoulder and patted his arm. She didn't want to leave him hanging so she tilted her head a bit and whispered to him. "For the record, I may have something to tell you soon, I just don't know yet."

He let out a quiet laugh and whispered back, "Good, I actually like this one."